What was he supposed to say? Christ. Right now, he wanted to lick that little bit of syrup off the corner of her mouth, and run his hands over the smooth skin on her legs—her ridiculously long legs that he could see every bit of, because of her impossibly short pajama bottoms.
“Billy, did you hear me?”
“Yeah. You wanna to ride or not?”
“I told you I did. Why are you acting so weird?”
“Just go get dressed,” he barked at her.
“Keep talking to me like that, and you’re gonna be cleaning the kitchen by yourself, cowboy. You might be finished by next weekend.”
“I won’t be here next weekend,” he growled.
Renie threw her napkin down on the counter and stood. She put her dishes in the sink and went downstairs.
Great. Now he made her mad.
Less than two minutes later she was back upstairs, dressed, and had her bag with her.
“Where are you going?”
“I’m going home, Billy. Everything I say or do makes you mad. Sorry about leaving you to clean up the kitchen, but it’s best if I go.”
Oh no, no. This wasn’t what he wanted to happen. He paced around the kitchen and ran his hand through his hair.
“Jesus, Renie. I’m sorry. Look, we do need to talk. I just don’t know where to start, but I sure as hell don’t want you to leave.”
She dropped her bag on the floor. Was she crying? Renie almost never cried. He kept making things worse.
“Come on,” he said, pulling her by the hand. “Let’s ride.”
She brought Pooh out of her stall while he figured out which horse to ride. She was quiet, and that wasn’t like her. If things were normal between them, she’d be giving him hell for the way he was acting.
“Come here,” he said, but walked to her and pulled her into a hug. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s goin’ on. Everything’s off kilter this weekend. I can’t explain it.”
She rested her head on his shoulder. “I hate this. We’re never like this. Why are we like this?”
“No idea,” he answered, but he was lying again.
They followed the heavily-treed trail until they reached the top of the short incline, in another few feet they’d come to a large meadow. Renie coaxed Pooh into a gallop.
He stayed a few paces back, watching her ride. It was a beautiful thing. Her long, blonde hair blew in the wind, and it was cold enough today that he could see her breath. There was a mist hovering over the trees that made up the Black Forest.
“Let’s go see your mom,” she shouted out before she took off in that direction.
The best view of his parents’ house was from this meadow. The house wasn’t as modern as Liv’s—his house now. It had been built in the traditional Colorado-style, with log siding and a tin roof. Each of the three levels had decks off the main rooms, with forest-green railings.
In the summer, his mom hung baskets filled with colorful flowers off the decks. Smoke streamed from the stone chimney that shot up on the kitchen side of the house. Another stone chimney mirrored on the side of the house opposite the one billowing smoke.
Renie climbed off Pooh and had opened the gate to the pasture by the time he rode up to the barn.
“Meet you inside,” she shouted, running in the direction of the back door.
His heart ran right along with her. Why had it taken him so long to realize she took it with her wherever she went?
Renie went inside, pulled her gloves off, and hung her jacket on the hook by the back door.
“Dottie? You in here?” she called out.
“Right here, sweetheart. I saw you two out riding, so there’s milk heating on the stove for cocoa. Come in here and warm up by the fire.”
Dottie pulled her into a big hug. Nobody gave hugs like Dottie. She held on a little longer than usual, and then kissed her cheek. “Everything okay with you, honey?”
“I’m okay, but I don’t think Billy is,” she said, biting her lip. “He’s out of sorts.”
“Pancakes didn’t go so well?”
“No, the pancakes were fine.” Renie laughed. “I figure you had a hand in them.”
“He called and asked me how to make them. In the time he took to write the directions, I could’ve ridden over, made them, and ridden back home.” Dottie chuckled. “It seemed important to him.”
“He made bacon too.”
Dottie raised her eyebrows.
“The kitchen looks like a war zone, and the main weapon used by both sides was flour.”
“I can picture it.”
“I don’t think that’s his problem, though.”
“I’ve been waiting for this day to come.”
Renie nodded, and looked out the window. Billy was headed their way, which meant she didn’t have time to ask Dottie what she’d been waiting for. Had they been waiting for the same thing—for Billy to realize Renie was no longer a little girl?
“Hey, Mama,” Billy said, coming in the back door and shedding his gloves and jacket as Renie had.
“How’d the pancakes go this morning?”
He glared at her, which made Renie laugh. “Billy, I’ve known you most of my life, and I’ve never seen you cook anything. Did you think I’d believe you whipped them up all on your own?”
“What are you two doing today? Besides cleaning the kitchen?” Dottie winked at Renie.
“I’m beginning to think I made a mistake buying the house next door.”
“Oh stop. You love livin’ next door to your mama.” Dottie patted his cheek.
She was right, he did. He’d loved Liv’s house since they built it on the open ranch land next to his parents’ place when he was a little boy.
The house he bought from Renie’s mom had two floors, the main one, where the kitchen, family room, master bedroom, and two other bedrooms were. On that floor there were two big stone fireplaces, both were double-sided. One was between the kitchen and the family room, the other was between the master bedroom and bathroom. Those fireplaces were among his favorite things about the house.
On the lower level, there were three more bedrooms, and another double-sided fireplace that opened to the deck outside the walkout great room.
The house had three bathrooms on the main floor and another three on the lower level. Billy doubted he’d ever set foot in more than two of them. The hundred acres the house sat on, bordered his parents’ land, so technically he lived next door, although a big, forested hill sat between the two ranches.
3
Billy wrote a text to Renie. Not going this weekend.
Why not?
Feeling off.
Why?
He wasn’t sure, but things had been off for him for most of the year. At the end of the previous year, he was the saddle bronc champ. This year he considered retiring. He knew it would mentally be worse for him to go out this weekend and have another crappy showing, than it would be for him to stay home and try to get his head on straight. He didn’t know where to start. So many things in his life weren’t working right.
Are you coming down? Two could play the answer a question with a question game.
Wasn’t planning to.
Now what? Should he ask her to? Seeing her was part of the reason he wanted to stay home. Maybe by Friday she’d change her mind.
Billy pulled up to the Irish pub in Palmer Lake, the town northwest of Monument. It would be crowded and loud on a Friday night. He wanted loud. Maybe it would drown out all the stuff going on inside his head. The stuff about Renie.
Gods somewhere were really fucking with him. If there were any girl alive—any single girl who walked the face of the earth—he shouldn’t be attracted to, it would be Renie. And she was all he could think about.
He wanted to get drunk—rip roaring drunk.
Several beers, and a few shots of whiskey later, Billy was too drunk to drive home. He couldn’t think of anyone he could call to call for a ride home. His parents would be asleep by now, not that
he’d call them anyway. He was thirty-three years old, not twenty-three.
Twenty-three. Renie was twenty-three. All week that’d been happening. No matter what thought came to mind, something about her followed.
He could just sleep it off in his truck, until he sobered up. Wouldn’t be the first time.
She might as well go to bed. Whatever possessed her to drive down here in the first place? Especially since Billy wasn’t home.
Her phone chirped. Hey, said the text message.
Hey, she answered.
What r u doin?
Hanging out in your house.
My house?
Yep.
Thought you weren’t coming.
Changed my mind.
Renie waited ten minutes for another text from him. She sat there, staring at the stupid phone. Waiting. Nothing.
Tomorrow morning she’d get up and drive back up to school. She needed to study, and the way things were between them lately, she wouldn’t be able to focus.
She was halfway down the stairs when her phone chirped again.
Wish I hadn’t left tonight.
What did he expect her to say? Why?
Cuz wish I was home.
Where was he—in jail? Why don’t you come home?
2 much 2 drink.
Oh for Christ’s sake. Where are you?
O’Malleys.
On my way.
Renie waited another two or three minutes to leave, in case he told her not to come, but he didn’t.
Billy was standing next to his truck when she pulled in. There wasn’t anywhere for her to park in the crowded lot, so she stopped and rolled down her window.
“Lookin’ for a ride, cowboy?”
Billy walked toward her car without answering. Even drunk Billy Patterson’s swagger was sexy as hell. Renie was five feet ten, Billy was at least six inches taller. He had dark, brown hair that he’d let grow longer than she’d ever seen it. His eyes were blue, but pale, not dark blue like hers.
His jacket hung open in the front, and his red plaid True Grit shirt fit tight across his chest, even with the top two buttons undone. His tan cowboy hat sat low enough that his eyes were partially covered, and when he smiled, his shit-eating grin and perfectly symmetrical dimples guaranteed Billy would get exactly what he wanted.
“Hey there, cowgirl.” Billy tipped his hat.
She smiled. “No cowgirls here that I can see.”
He climbed in the passenger seat and turned sideways, so he faced her. “Come on, Renie, you’re a cowgirl. You know you are. You have been since you were a little bit a nuthin’ ridin’ around on Pooh Bear.”
“How much did you have to drink tonight, Billy?”
“Not enough to chase the ghosts away, Renie.” Billy stroked the side of her face.
“Ghosts?” she whispered.
“Your ghosts, Renie. You been hauntin’ me tonight, you been hauntin’ me all week, and no amount of whiskey could get you out of my head.”
Billy cupped the back of her neck. “You know what I’m talkin’ about, don’t ya?”
If Billy kissed her right now, and then didn’t remember tomorrow, it would kill her.
“Please don’t, Billy.”
“I gotta.” He pulled her closer and put his lips on hers.
She gasped, and opened her lips slightly. He must’ve taken it as a sign. His mouth went from gentle to rough, his tongue attacked hers.
He pulled back, his hand still tight on her neck. “I knew it,” he said, his eyes looking deeply into hers.
“What did you know, Billy?”
“Fucking amazing. I knew it would be.” He leaned forward and nipped her bottom lip, pulling it until her mouth opened to his again.
Renie pulled back, getting lightheaded. “Let’s get you home,” she murmured.
“Home.” He threw his hat over the seat. “I live in your house, Renie.”
“It’s not my house, Billy. It’s your house now.” She pulled out of the parking lot.
“I can feel you in it, even when you ain’t there. It’s your house too, Renie. Your ghost hangs out there, hauntin’ me.”
Yep, he was drunk. She turned the music up, hoping he’d pass out between here and home.
She helped him into the house, and as far as the big couch in the family room.
“Come here,” he said, lying on his back, reaching up for her.
“Night, Billy.” She tossed a blanket at him.
“Wait, Renie, come back. We need to talk.”
“We’ll talk in the morning.” If he even remembered this. She went downstairs, no more ready to go to sleep than she was when he texted her to pick him up.
Billy lifted his head to look around and immediately put it back down on the pillow on the couch. Jesus, how much had he had to drink last night? And how did he get here? He hoped like hell he hadn’t driven here.
He didn’t remember a thing except his crazy-ass dreams. Renie was in every one, kissin’ him. It made him hard thinking about it. He tried again to raise his spinning head, no good. He felt nauseous. He closed his eyes instead, hoping his dreams about Renie came back, so he could imagine feeling her lips on his.
When he opened his eyes again, he had to shield his eyes from the sun. He pulled out his phone to check the time. One in the afternoon? Shit.
He sat up a little too quickly, and had to wait a second before he stood. He walked as far as the kitchen and saw his truck keys on the counter. Damn. He did drive home. What was wrong with him? He knew better. He picked up his keys and saw the note.
Your dad and I got your truck. Took care of the horses. Your turn tonight. Renie.
He hadn’t dreamt it—she had been here. What about the rest of it? Did he dream about kissing her, or had he? Billy went to the window, but didn’t see her car.
He pulled a beer from the refrigerator, and saw a container that hadn’t been there the day before. It looked like soup. God love Renie Fairchild—she’d left him something to eat. He heated it up and went to sit back on the couch, but instead kept going, into the bedroom. He set the bowl on the dresser, and pulled out his phone.
Where are you? he texted. He put the phone down, and picked up his soup. She still hadn’t answered by the time he finished it. He rested his head on the pillow. Maybe he’d sleep a while, then get up and check on the horses later.
He shook himself awake, and checked to see whether Renie had answered. Nope, and it was almost five.
When he walked into the barn something didn’t feel right. He looked in each of the stalls, and then it hit him. Where was Pooh? He didn’t remember seeing her out in the pasture. He walked back out to check anyway. No sign of her.
He checked his phone again. Renie still hadn’t answered, and now he was worried. He couldn’t very well text and ask about her horse, the one that was supposed to be in his care. He called his dad instead.
“I have a situation over here, Dad. I might need your help.”
“What’s goin’ on, Billy?”
“I think I lost a horse.”
His dad laughed. “A whole horse?”
“Seriously, Dad. I can’t find Pooh.”
“Renie brought her here.”
“Why’d she do that? And why didn’t she tell me? Shit, I’m freakin’ out over here.”
“She wouldn’t say, just asked whether it was okay if she did. She told your mama she’d explain later. I hate to ask this, but did you do something to upset her?”
“I don’t feel right about this,” Bill said.
“Pooh’s home is on the other side of this hill. I don’t know what Renie’s particular problem is, other than I went out and got drunk last night, and then made the mistake of asking her to come and get me. I can see her bein’ pissed, but that isn’t a reason to move her horse.”
“She seemed determined.”
Billy laughed. “That doesn’t sound so unusual.”
“She’s gonna be mad.”
“Yep, I know it
, but I’ll keep you and Mom out of it.”
Bill put his hand on Billy’s shoulder. “Why don’t you tell me what’s really going on?”
“She won’t answer me.”
“Who won’t?”
“Renie. When I got up this morning, she was gone. I’ve been trying to get in touch with her all day. She won’t answer.”
His dad shook his head. “You may have gone too far this time, Billy.”
Billy texted Renie again, for the fifth time. Still no response out of her. He wanted to wring her damn neck.
Probably not the best idea, but he called her mother. “Hey Liv, have you talked to Renie?”
“Earlier this morning, why? Is everything okay?”
He couldn’t remember much about last night, and didn’t want to speculate about what may or may not have happened. He also didn’t want to tell Liv that Renie moved Pooh to his parents’ stable, or that he brought Pooh back to his barn. That would unleash a whole slew of questions he couldn’t answer.
“Everything’s fine. Texted her, but she hasn’t answered yet.”
“Don’t know what to tell you, Billy. Maybe she’s ignoring her phone to get some studying done. What’s up? Anything I can help with?”
“You’ve done enough. How you talked me into keeping the stables goin’ is beyond me.”
“What does this have to do with Renie?”
“Please just ask her to call me if you talk to her.”
Three hours later he got a text.
What?
Was she kidding? What? He’d been texting and calling her all damn day. Call me.
Fifteen minutes passed with no response. He called her for the millionth time, and again she didn’t answer. He was pissed.
What the hell, Renie? What’s your problem?
What was her problem? If he remembered what happened the night before, he wouldn’t be asking that question.
All her life she wanted Billy Patterson to kiss her, and now that he had, he didn’t remember.
Renie was about to have the most awkward conversation of her life. She was calling her mom to talk about Billy. She didn’t have any choice, there was no one else she trusted enough to tell her deepest darkest secret to.
Dance with Me (Cowboys of Crested Butte Book 2) Page 3