Dance with Me (Cowboys of Crested Butte Book 2)

by Heather Slade

  “If Liv and I have a girl, I don’t think I’ll live through her courting years. When I met Renie she was already grown up, and I gotta tell you, I’m about ready to sit both you and Cowboy Patterson down and threaten you within an inch of your lives.”

  “I hear ya.” He laughed. “I want what’s best for her,” he said more seriously. “I care about Irene. I’d like to be the man that puts a smile on her face for the rest of her life. Although I’m beginning to think I don’t have a prayer in hell up against…what did you call him? Cowboy Patterson.”

  “See ya in a bit, Jace. And good luck. Never liked Patterson all that much myself, but can’t say I disagree with your assessment.”

  Jace was waiting near the barn when Renie rode up on Pooh.

  “Good morning,” he said.

  “Hey.”

  “Wanted to say goodbye.”

  “Heading back?” She looked in the direction of the pass. “It’s a beautiful day for a drive home.”

  “Yep, it is.” He took off his cowboy hat and walked toward her. “I hoped we could talk before I go.”

  She climbed down and took Pooh’s reins. “Sure. Of course. I owe you an apology.”

  “Nah, you don’t. I figure things are hard enough for you right now without me complicating them.”

  She laughed. “True. They are.”

  He was close enough to touch her face, so he did. When she leaned in closer to him, he lost what little resolve he thought he had. His palm held her cheek as he leaned in to kiss her. When she kissed him back, he grabbed her around the waist and pulled her into him.

  19

  Her arms circled his neck, keeping him close. She pulled away from his kiss and rested her forehead against his chin.

  “I was supposed to be apologizing to you, not making it worse.”

  “Uh, I’ll take worse along with that kind of apology anytime you want to give it to me,” he answered.

  She let go and walked Pooh into the barn.

  “I’m serious, Jace. I can’t do this. I mean…”

  “You’re in love with him.”

  “I am, but I heard what you said yesterday. Something between us doesn’t work. Even before he became a dad, he saw it.”

  She looked away from him, shook her head, and laughed. Then looked back at him. “You’re so much alike.”

  “Oh man, I wish you wouldn’t say that. Jeez, Irene, no man wants to be told he’s so much like the guy he’s trying to steal you away from.”

  She laughed again, but she was frowning.

  “Billy and his family are coming for Thanksgiving. I need to figure things out before then. You know…what I want, how I feel, who I am.” She took a deep breath. “And what the hell is wrong with me.”

  “I’d like to help.”

  “You just confuse me more. You don’t help.”

  “No, I’m serious.” He held both his hands up. “Hands off, I promise. Talking only.”

  She raised her eyebrows at him as if to say she doubted him.

  “How was your ride?”

  “Too short.”

  “Wanna go back out? If we did, we could talk, and you’d know for sure I wouldn’t try to kiss you.”

  “That sounds nice. I miss riding with you.”

  “I miss riding with you, too.”

  “Ben won’t care which horse you ride.”

  “What about that one?” he said, pointing to Micah.

  “Uh, no. That’s my mom’s horse and nobody rides him but her and…”

  “Who?”

  “She lets Billy ride him.”

  “Why him? Not you?”

  “I’m sure she’d let me if I wanted to, but I don’t. And the reason Billy gets to ride him is because he took care of him after my mom’s accident.”

  “Your lives are entwined.”

  “You have no idea.”

  They rode out over the hills of the Rice Ranch, quiet at first.

  “Why don’t you tell me about him? Forget who I am, just talk about him.”

  “Seriously, Jace. I can’t do that.”

  “No, I’m serious. Tell me what you feel. I won’t lie and tell you hearing about him won’t hurt, because I know you love him. On the other hand, you need somebody to talk to. I’m here, and I’m offering.”

  “We already did this.”

  “No, we didn’t. You told me about him, not about you and him. Tell me what’s got you so tied up in knots.”

  “If only it was that easy.”

  “It is. Start talking. Try a pros and cons list. Here’s the good stuff, and here’s the bad stuff.”

  “I can probably handle that.”

  Once she started it was easy to talk about the good things about Billy. There was so much she loved about him. She talked about the Billy she knew when she was a little girl, and how kind he was to her. Sometimes she felt as though Billy was the only person who really saw her. When she thought no one was paying attention, she’d look at him, and he’d be watching her. Studying her.

  She told Jace about the day she rode Pooh out into the meadow the first time, and how Billy didn’t tease her about giving a girl horse a boy’s name. He told her that day to listen to her horse as much as she talked to him, and now she realized that was what Billy did with everybody. He listened more than he talked. He paid attention.

  “Confidence,” she said. “That’s another thing. Until I met you, I’d never met anybody as confident as Billy Patterson.” That had been a deal-breaker, she told him.

  “When my mom got hurt, I don’t know what I would’ve done without Billy. My mom was impossible to deal with.” She laughed. “Between trying to hide her condition from Ben, to being the biggest pain in the ass in the world, she was also very depressed. I’d never seen my mom that way. Billy helped so much. He was there every step of the way. No one else thought about me, everyone was worried about my mom. And rightly so. But not Billy. He worried about me.”

  “What else?” Jace asked.

  Renie talked about how much fun Billy was. He made her smile, he made her laugh. He was the first person she felt like a woman with, instead of a kid.

  If Renie ever needed anything, she knew Billy would do everything in his power to make sure she got it. Everyone else had given in to her about school. When she said she wasn’t going back, no one argued with her. Not Ben, not her mom, but Billy had. He pushed her to at least consider going back.

  “Is there more to this superhero, or is that it?”

  “There’s more, but I don’t think I feel comfortable talking about it.”

  “Door’s open, pretend I’m a priest or something.”

  “Jace—”

  “I’m not kidding, Irene. You have this one opportunity to talk about whatever you want. It may not come again. And I’m not watching a clock trying to hurry you along.”

  “Okay, but remember, you asked.”

  “I’m ready, give me your worst.”

  “He was my first…you know.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Yeah. I wanted him to be. But, I didn’t think he saw me that way, as a woman, rather than a little girl. I was the sidekick, and I assumed one day he’d find someone who was more…and I’d get left behind.”

  Jace stopped his horse. She reined Pooh in as soon as she realized it.

  “What?”

  “I’m not here to comment. I’m here to listen.”

  “If you have something to say, say it.”

  “Think about what you just said. Figure it out for yourself.”

  “Which part?”

  “You heard me, figure it out for yourself.”

  “I was afraid he’d find someone else?”

  He shrugged his shoulders.

  “It’s the reason I told my mom to sell him her ranch.”

  “Why?”

  “Because I knew that I wouldn’t be able to stand watching him from afar. The Pattersons would never give up their ranch to another family. I knew one day it would be where Bi
lly lived with his wife, and their children. I knew it would rip me to pieces to see him with someone else. I’ve loved him for so long.”

  “Keep going.”

  “About this, or pros and cons?”

  “So far I haven’t heard any cons, and I’d sure like to. But if you have more pros, keep goin’.”

  She could talk for hours about the virtues of Billy Patterson. He was, after all, her favorite person on the planet. But what about the not so wonderful stuff? That was harder.

  “He slept around a lot. Before me. I guess that isn’t much of a surprise.” She looked at Jace and raised an eyebrow.

  “What? We’re talkin’ about Billy, remember?”

  She thought back to the first time she met Jace, and how she wondered if he greeted all the new girls who came to the ranch personally.

  “He’s stubborn.”

  “Keep goin’. I like this part.”

  “He’s selfish.”

  “Care to elaborate on any of these condemnations? I’m enjoying this.”

  “Before we became…romantic…Billy took me for granted. He expected me to be around when he wanted me to be.” She laughed. “He’d call me and ask me to dinner, and then expect me to cook it for him.

  “He relied on me to be there for him. He never asked, he expected. And, of course, I was. I wanted to be around as much as I could.”

  She looked at Jace, who nodded his head. “Go on.”

  “He was the saddle bronc champ year before last.”

  “That’s a con?”

  “It’s not a pro or a con. It’s just something about him, part of what makes him who he is. Cowboys like him, the good ones, are some of the best men on the planet. They’re honorable and gracious. They know their lives ebb and flow by the luck of the draw of the horse, or the bull. Don’t get me wrong, there’s a lot of skill necessary to get to their level. And with it, there’s an expectation, a code among them, that they’ll have humility. You know, ‘work hard, stay humble.’”

  He nodded again.

  “You’re one of them too. I don’t know why I’m even telling you this.”

  “First, thank you. Second—keep talking about Billy.”

  “Doesn’t stop any of you from being cocky, Billy included. I doubt he gave much thought about any of the women he had sex with.”

  She rode for a while without saying anything.

  “I didn’t believe him at first, about Roxanne. He told me he’d never had a relationship, or a girlfriend, and I didn’t believe him. When we went to Texas, when he found out Willow was his baby, I thought he lied to me.”

  “What changed your mind?”

  “He did. We argued about it, and I realized he was telling me the truth. I should have known he wouldn’t lie to me about something like that.”

  “So we’re back to pros.”

  “He’s a good man. I know it in my heart.”

  “So where’s your damage comin’ from?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “There’s something that’s holding you back. Keeping you from taking the next step with Billy. Is it the baby, or is there more to it?”

  “That’s what he asks me. I don’t have an answer for you any more than I do for him. Or myself.”

  “Without the baby, would you be with him?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “So…”

  “So? What? You’re obviously trying to get me to come to an epiphany, and I’m not seeing it.”

  “There is something that’s holding you back from giving in…trusting him.”

  They rode another few minutes in silence. Irene was thinking hard on what he said. It seemed so obvious to him, but he wasn’t a shrink. What if he was wrong? He wanted to help her, but there wasn’t a lot he could do or say if she couldn’t see what was so obvious to him. He could lead her to water, he couldn’t make her drink it.

  “What about this? Worst-case scenario…you and Billy. What would that look like?”

  He hit on something with that question, because now she was crying.

  “I can’t.”

  “You can. You’ve gone this far. What is it? What’s the worst thing you can imagine happening between you and Billy?”

  She didn’t answer him, but it was obvious she’d found her answer. Tears streamed down her cheeks.

  “Say it out loud.”

  “No.”

  “I don’t think this is a good idea,” Dottie said to Billy.

  “I’m not askin’ you, Mama.”

  “Billy!”

  “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to disrespect you, but there’s gotta come a day I figure out what I’m gonna do in my life without asking my mama’s opinion.”

  “You have a point, Billy. I’m sorry. I’m just sayin’—”

  “Don’t say anything. I gotta do this, and if it blows up in my face, then I’ll know who to blame.”

  Dottie picked up Willow from where she sat, happily playing while they talked. “Grandma’s gonna miss you, baby girl.”

  “It won’t be for that long.”

  “I know, but I miss her when I’m away from her for an hour, so I’m gonna miss her more now.”

  “I know what you mean. I miss her when she goes to sleep.”

  He took Willow from his mother and hugged her. “I love you so much.” He nuzzled her neck, and she giggled.

  “Dadadada,” she said, and opened her mouth to give his cheek one of her special kisses.

  “Do you have everything packed?”

  “Nah, I haven’t even started packin’ Willow’s stuff yet.”

  “Give her to me. I’ll pack her stuff, and you can start loading the truck.”

  He kissed Dottie’s cheek. “Thanks, Mama.”

  “Gives me a few more minutes with my little angel.”

  “Thank you,” Renie said to Jace when they got back to the barn.

  “You’re welcome. I hope it helped.”

  “It did.”

  “I think you figured it out.”

  “I guess I did, but I need time to sort through it.”

  “I’m a phone call away if you want to talk more.”

  “Thanks, Jace.”

  He ran his finger down her cheek. “We both know this is the end of the road for us, other than as friends.”

  She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I’m so glad you feel that way.”

  “I don’t, or I don’t want to, but listening to you talk about Billy convinced me that even if you decided you wanted to be with me, it wouldn’t last. You love Billy. All you need to do is conquer your fears. It might not happen fast enough for Billy, but it’ll happen eventually.”

  “This is gonna be our home for a while baby girl,” Billy said the next morning as they drove into town. He stopped by the realtor’s office, signed the final paperwork and picked up the keys.

  “Everything will be finalized tomorrow morning,” she told him.

  It didn’t matter, he had the keys, and he was ready to get his baby girl settled. There was a lot more happening tomorrow, important things, which he needed to focus on.

  He patted his pocket, as he did every three or four minutes. Yep, it was still there.

  He hoped he could get Willow to take a nap so he could unpack the truck. This was one of those times he could use his mama’s help, or anyone’s help. Then it occurred to him. There was someone he knew who understood the position he was in better than anyone else. He couldn’t believe it had taken him this long to realize it.

  “Hey-o, Billy. What’s up?”

  “Hey, Livvie. I called to ask your help with somethin’.”

  “Yeah, what’s that?”

  “Could you come into town?”

  “To Monument?”

  “No.” He laughed. “Crested Butte.”

  “You’re here?”

  “Yep.”

  “Where are you exactly?”

  He gave her the address, and told her his plan.

  “Let me find Be
n and tell him where I’m going. I’ll be there in less than an hour.”

  “Sure. Just don’t mention it to Renie.”

  “Not a word, I promise.”

  “Bold move,” she said when he answered the front door. “Not unlike you, though.” She reached out for Willow, who held tighter to her daddy.

  “Oh no, you’ve forgotten me. I haven’t been around enough.” Liv started to tickle Willow, who got over her shyness quickly once she heard Liv’s voice.

  “They say they remember voices more than faces.” Willow reached out for Liv who took her from Billy. “Let’s go find something to play with, shall we? Where did your daddy put that bag full of toys I know he brought with him?”

  Willow pointed to a canvas bag sitting in the middle of the living room floor.

  “When does the furniture arrive?” Liv asked.

  “I haven’t gotten that far.”

  “Where are you planning to sleep?”

  “I brought Willow’s travel crib, the one she uses when she’s with my parents, and an air mattress for me.”

  “You go unload the truck, we’ll play.” Live looked from Willow to Billy. “And then your daddy and I will talk.”

  Willow started babbling, and Billy escaped to unpack the truck.

  “Do you want me to order in food?” Liv asked as he made one of his trips inside with stuff.

  “Sure. That Stash place was good.”

  “Perfect. I know their number by heart.”

  Billy had most of the truck unpacked by the time the food arrived. Luckily the house had a built-in microwave so he could heat up Willow’s baby food, which she had little interest in once she saw what her dad and Liv were eating.

  “I don’t want pizza to become her favorite food,” Billy said, watching her dive into a piece.

  “If it does, she’ll live. Kids crave what they need. Tomorrow she may try to swipe your banana, or dig her fingers into a salad.”

  “You remember a lot about raising a baby.”

  “I do, but I’ve also been reading baby books.” Liv laughed and rubbed her tummy. “It’s been a long, long time since I had a little girl around.” She kissed the top of Willow’s head when she said it.

  “Hoping for another one?”

  “It doesn’t matter. Ben would say differently. He’s terrified of being a little girl’s daddy. Says he doesn’t know how to do girls. He’ll figure it out, if that’s what we have.”