Drama Girls: A Lesbian Romance

by Mia Archer

  The words came out of my mouth, but to be perfectly honest I wasn’t sure if they were true. The more I looked up at the church and thought about walking down into the basement with Sarah at my side the more I worried.

  What would Pastor Dave think? I could already imagine he wasn’t going to be too happy with me considering it’d been awhile since I’d gone to youth group.

  It’s not like it was my fault. Drama club was an all the time sort of thing. Especially if I was the lead. It meant rehearsals every day after school and then on weekends as well.

  By the time we got done I was usually so exhausted that the only thing I wanted to do was hang out with Sarah on the walk home. Not to mention the idea of walking home hand in hand with Sarah always sounded a lot more fun than the thought of getting a stern talking to from Pastor Dave.

  “You okay Chloe?” she asked.

  She kept glancing up at the church as though she was unsure about this too. It was clear she didn’t like the idea of coming here, but it was also clear that she was going to do it. For me.

  That made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. She was willing to do this for me. That meant I couldn’t chicken out and decide I didn’t want to go.

  These were my friends after all. They’d been most of my friend group before I got involved in drama and sort of stopped going.

  Maybe I should’ve felt guilty about that, but I didn’t.

  “We might as well get going,” I said. “They’ll probably be singing right now.”

  We made our way down the steps into the basement and sure enough I could hear the familiar strains of Pastor Dave’s acoustic guitar playing as everyone sang one of the hymns he was fond of.

  I’d never been a big fan of the singing. Let’s just say I might be the lead in a play but I was never going to be the lead in a musical. He loved singing, though, so he was always getting out that stupid guitar.

  I blushed. That wasn’t a very nice thought. Not that I’d been having many nice thoughts about Pastor Dave lately.

  We stepped into the room and I felt a chill coming over everyone. It started with Pastor Dave looking up at us and he immediately stopped strumming his guitar.

  That look was like nothing I’d ever seen before. He looked at me with disappointment, but then when he looked at Sarah his eyes went wide and then narrowed as though he really wasn’t happy to see her.

  What could be going on here? He usually acted so easygoing even if he did have a bit of a temper on the best of days.

  Sarah reached out and took my hand. I blushed, but I also didn’t push her away. I’d gotten used to the idea of holding hands with Sarah. I liked holding hands with Sarah. I wasn’t going to stop even if Pastor Dave looked even more upset that we were holding hands.

  I was surprised that the usual panic I’d felt when I was first dealing with these feelings didn’t grip me now. Maybe it was a sign of all the changes that had come over me since I started at high school.

  Whatever it was, I pulled Sarah into the room and sat down in some empty seats near the back. Craig turned to look at us and he didn’t look happy at all.

  “I think we can be done with the singing for now,” Pastor Dave said. “There are more important things for us to be discussing anyways right now.”

  I’m not sure why, but I suddenly had a very bad feeling about this. The way he pointedly looked at us told me this was somehow going to be about me.

  “Today we’re going to revisit a theme I’ve been talking about with you guys since the school year started. Can someone tell me what that is?”

  A girl near the front who was new, she looked like she’d probably just started coming to the group since she got to middle school, raised her hand.

  “We’re talking about worldliness and temptation,” she said.

  “Exactly right,” Pastor Dave said with a smile. “Worldliness. And temptation.”

  If there was any doubt he was aiming this talk at us it disappeared as he looked at me right as he mentioned temptation. For some reason he’d decided to target us.

  Again there was a time when that would’ve terrified me. Now I found myself staring back at him and squeezing Sarah’s hand.

  I knew it had been a mistake to take her here. She’d been absolutely correct in wanting to avoid this place. It wasn’t a good place for her. For us.

  There was a time when I would’ve thought that was worldliness and temptation whispering to me, but the more time I spent with Sarah and the people in the drama club, the more I realized they were good people even if they were different, the more I started to realize that maybe it was Pastor Dave who was wrong about all this.

  “If you want to leave then we can leave,” I whispered to Sarah.

  I turned to look at her. I expected her to be frozen. She’d been so firm about not wanting to come to church with me and now the worst thing that could possibly happen was happening.

  So I was surprised to see that she was staring at Pastor Dave with a clear challenge in her eyes even as he stared back at us.

  “No,” she said after taking a deep breath. “No. I need to stay here. I need to let him know he has no power over me.”

  I cocked my head to the side and really looked at her. Wondered what the heck was going on here that she would say something weird like that.

  “Temptation is all around you,” Pastor Dave said. “And all of you need to be aware of it. All of you need to know that you should avoid temptation whenever it comes for you, and it will come for you.”

  The entire time he was talking to the group while staring directly at me and Sarah. A couple of people turned around to look at us and I started to blush, but I forced myself to look forward.

  “The devil is out there. He might take a pleasing form. He might look at you through the eyes of something that seems like a thing you want very much, but you have to be strong,” he said.

  Finally he locked eyes with me. “I see that Chloe has come here tonight as a shining example to us.”

  I looked around. Everyone’s eyes turned to look at me. There was a time when I would’ve felt uncomfortable being the center of attention like that, but that was before I’d gotten used to being up onstage with everyone in the club looking at me perform.

  It was just like Sarah said. He had no power over me. It was like being in drama had prepared me for dealing with most of Pastor Dave’s favorite tactics for keeping the people in the youth group under his thumb.

  “Yes. Chloe here is a shining example of what we do not do when we are out in the world and it tries to tempt us with its forbidden fruits!”

  I stared at Pastor Dave and I was surprised to realize that I was feeling something other than the shame I’d usually feel when he was going on like this.

  I’d see it happen time and again. He decided he didn’t like what someone in the youth group was doing, and so he singled them out in front of everyone. He made them feel miserable. He used that to keep them in line.

  I looked at everyone else turning and staring at me. Narrowing their eyes. Looking like they were actually mad at me because Pastor Dave told them they should be mad at me.

  I knew that each and every one of them had to be thankful they weren’t the ones getting singled out. Even Craig was glaring at me, but I’m sure part of that was because he was starting to realize that maybe me showing up with Sarah today meant he was out of the picture for good.

  Not that he’d ever been in the picture to begin with, but try telling him that.

  “The Bible tells us that it’s a sin to be with someone of the same gender, and yet Chloe comes down here with this girl who is known for tempting…”

  He droned on. That was interesting. He was going on almost like he knew Sarah. Meanwhile she stood there staring at him, but I could tell from the way she shook and her hand squeezed mine that there was something going on here.

  And something inside of me snapped.

  I’d done so many things since going to high school. I’d taken a dram
a class. Joined the drama club. Made a whole new set of friends. Gotten the courage to go up and audition. I’d won the starring role in a play when no freshman had done that in more than a decade if Mr. Thompson was to be believed.

  After doing all that and being so brave was I really going to let myself be pushed around by this… bully?

  I stood. I wasn’t sure what I was going to say. I opened my mouth and words spilled out.

  “You’re a sad angry little man, and God doesn’t speak through you. God is love, and you’re hate, and we all know who does that.”

  The room went silent. Which is to say Pastor Dave finally stopped his ranting. He stared daggers at me and opened his mouth, but I got there first. I knew just what to say.

  I dredged something up that I’d heard him say more than a few times. Something that seemed appropriate in the moment.

  “For such men are false apostles, deceitful workers, masquerading as apostles of Christ. And no wonder, for Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light.”

  Oh boy I was surprised I could still remember that whole thing. Thank the big guy above for all those stupid days we spent in youth group memorizing Bible passages for Bible Jeopardy. I never thought I’d use that memorizing to turn the tables on Pastor Dave, but they say the big guy works in mysterious ways.

  His eyes went wide. There was a sharp intake of breath from everyone sitting around us, but I didn’t stick around long enough to hear what the reaction was.

  “Come on Sarah,” I said. “We don’t have to spend any more time around this bully.”

  I pulled her up and was surprised at my confidence. Usually she was the one who didn’t take any shit, the one who acted protective around me.

  I guess it was my turn to return that favor.

  So I pulled her along and out of the basement. We walked up the stairs and the entire time I thought I’d hear Pastor Dave coming behind us ready to yell and froth at the mouth.

  He’d done it before. I was surprised no one had ever reported him. I thought of reporting him, but even as I thought of it I figured it’d be better to ignore him.

  He was a sad little man and he could sit there ruling over his little kingdom that had nothing to do with God. If he was right and his version of the Lord was the correct version then that wasn’t anything I wanted to do with.

  I couldn’t believe that the God of love, the God I held in my heart even after everything that had happened this year and all the changes, would be the hateful God that Pastor Dave talked about.

  Even if Sarah would probably laugh at me and tell me I was believing in fairy stories. She could have her beliefs and I’d keep to mine, thank you very much.

  It wasn’t until we got out on the church steps that Sarah finally lost it. Her grip on my hand became so tight that it was almost painful. I looked at her to ask her to maybe lighten up a little bit and saw that she was pale and her whole body was shaking violently.

  I didn’t know what to do so I wrapped her in a hug. I figured that was the best I could offer. As soon as my arms were around her she collapsed against me and we very nearly went spilling down the concrete steps.

  I only just managed to catch my footing at the last moment.

  “It’s okay,” I said. “He can’t hurt you…”

  I didn’t know what was going on here. I’d never seen Sarah lose it like this. I’d never seen her as anything but the cool confident girl who didn’t take any crap from anyone.

  Not even from Courtney, and believe me there’d been plenty of crap to go around from her once she realized she wasn’t going to be the lead in the fall play. I didn’t know how Sarah could be friends with her, but I also wasn’t going to say anything about it.

  I wanted to ask her what was going on here, but I figured I’d let her have her cry. Get it all out. And I prayed that Pastor Dave wouldn’t decide to take that moment to appear and ruin the whole thing by being a complete asshole.

  I blushed. I was so worked up that I was swearing in my head.

  Finally the crying seemed to come to an end. I looked into her eyes and I couldn’t help myself. We were in public and we might get a few looks if there was anyone around to look, but she was so beautiful.

  So I leaned in and kissed her. Right on the steps of the church that had taught me for so many years that kissing a girl like Sarah was wrong.

  Well anything that felt this good couldn’t be wrong. Pastor Dave could go fly a kite if he thought I was going to stop because of his hateful words.

  When I pulled away from the kiss there was a shadow of a smile on Sarah’s face. I took her hand and we moved silently down those steps and away from the church. After we were about a block away I figured it might be safe to talk.

  “So do you want to tell me what that was all about?” I asked.

  Sarah looked up at the sky then back at the church. Maybe she was worried Pastor Dave was going to be following us too.

  “It’s a long story,” she said. “But the short version is I was a good girl who went to her youth group once upon a time too.”

  She paused for a long moment. I kept right on walking in silence. I figured she’d tell me the rest of the story when she was good and ready. Finally my patience was rewarded.

  “I guess the people at that youth group weren’t the good friends I thought they were. I was confused and told the youth pastor I was having thoughts about girls and, well…”

  She trailed off and a light went off over my head.

  “The youth pastor was Pastor Dave, wasn’t it?”

  “He called himself David back then, but yeah,” she said. “That’s why I was so worried the moment I walked in there.”

  Another long pause as we walked along.

  “I’m sorry,” I said. “I shouldn’t have dragged you there.”

  “No, don’t be,” Sarah replied. “That sucked, but I actually feel better about it now. It was like I got to stand up to him in a way I never did back then.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Positive,” Sarah said. “Besides. You were amazing in there!”

  Then she did something that made me feel warm and fuzzy all over. She smiled. Really and truly smiled for the first time since we walked into the church basement and she laid eyes on Pastor Dave.

  And she was right. I couldn’t believe I’d done that. I stood up to him instead of taking it like everyone else.

  Being around Sarah sure had changed me, but I couldn’t help but think it was a change for the best.

  19

  Sarah

  Someone cleared her throat behind me. I turned around fully expecting to see Chloe standing there giving me her not-quite-as-shy-as-it-once-was look, but I was surprised to instead see Courtney standing there.

  Well, it would be more accurate to say that Courtney was standing there with Mike next to her. She didn’t look happy about something either.

  Not that I was surprised that she didn’t look happy about something. She’d been walking around the place like an angry cat for the past couple of weeks. She still hadn’t gotten over the fact that she was playing a supporting part rather than getting the starring role of Violet which she thought she deserved as a big bad senior.

  Those were the breaks though.

  I was surprised to see her there though. She could get into snits. There were long stretches in our friendship where we hadn’t spoken, and ever since she realized she wasn’t going to be a lead in this play we’d been in the middle of one of those stretches.

  “What’s up Courtney?” I asked, forcing a smile.

  The whole smiling thing still felt weird. Sure I was doing more of it now that I had Chloe around, but I was so used to walking around with permanent resting bitch face that it was weird feeling the corners of my lips quirking up.

  Another pause. Then Mike elbowed her in the side. She jumped a little and took a step forward.

  “I was wondering if you would like to go to a party we’re having at my place tonight,” she said.
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  “Are you sure you want me to go to your party tonight?” I asked.

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” she asked.

  I probably shouldn’t have risen to the bait, but I was like a big fat bass sitting just under the water looking at the nice fat wiggling worm run through by something shiny thinking “now that looks delicious.”

  Yeah. I shouldn’t have taken the bait, but I was going to bite.

  “Maybe I was thinking about how you haven’t given me the time of day since I got a lead in the play and you got a supporting part,” I said. “Maybe I was thinking how weird it is that a girl who’s supposed to be my best friend suddenly doesn’t have time for me.”

  “Yeah? Well maybe I’ve been thinking about how much it sucks that my best friend has dropped me for her freshman piece!” Courtney shot back.

  That brought me up short. I looked at her and then to Mike. He looked like he’d rather be anywhere but between the two of us, and he was pointedly inspecting a piece of lighting up in the rafters above the stage.

  And in that moment I realized that maybe I hadn’t been the best friend all this time. I’d thought she was walking around pissed off because she was upset about not getting the part, but what if…

  “You really think I’ve abandoned you?” I asked.

  “Well you have,” she said. “This was going to be our year, my year, and now I’ve been replaced by that freshman. In the play and with my best friend.”

  There was genuine hurt in her voice and I suddenly felt like a real piece of shit for not making an effort to spend more time with Courtney. This was going to be her last year at this school, after all, our last chance to spend time together, and I’d been ignoring her.

  Sure I had a pretty good reason for ignoring her. I’d seen it happen to other people as well. They get a boyfriend or girlfriend and they forget all their old friends. At least until the inevitable breakup.

  I never thought I’d see myself doing the same thing. Mostly because I’d never thought I’d actually have a girlfriend until I went off to college.

  Still, now I had a girlfriend, or something that felt a lot like having a girlfriend, and I’d pretty much dropped or ignored my friends.