Understanding Mercy

by Janelle Ashley

  “I did not.”

  “Yes, you did.”

  “When did I propose to you?”

  “When you said you wanted us to be lighthouses together.”

  She thought about her words to him and then nodded. “I suppose you are right. What do you think of that? A woman proposing. Well, it’s 1786 now. Times are changing.”

  “Well, let’s go talk to your father, my progressive future wife.”

  When they walked into her father’s room, her mother sat at a chair by his bedside reading and when she turned around and looked at them her face broke out in a smile. “It took you long enough to find him, Mercy.”

  “I know. But I found him and I brought him here. Better late than never.”

  She gave Addison a knowing smiling and he returned it, with a whispered, “My sentiments exactly.”

  Her mother stood and motioned to the chair. “Here, Mr. Berkeley. James wants to talk with you.”

  Addison quickly sat and leaned toward her father whose tired eyes looked up at him and he managed a weak smile and said slowly, “Thank you. I don’t know what else to say.”

  “You don’t have to say anything else.”

  “But I feel the need. You have showered blessings upon me, and I’ve done nothing to deserve it.”

  “That isn’t true. I told you before that when you were kind to me as a child, I never forgot it. You planted a seed in me, and it reaped a harvest.”

  “What if I hadn’t planted that seed? What if I’d rushed to my coach and ignored you? Where would we be right now?”

  “Well, you don’t need to think about that because you didn’t ignore me.” He leaned a bit closer and continued, “I have some papers I want you to sign tomorrow so we can get started on our shipping business.” He reached up his hand and Mercy came and stood beside him and took it. Her father understood what the gesture meant and his eyes sparkled with happiness. Addison continued, “With your permission, I would like Mercy to be my wife.”

  His voice came out somewhat garbled, but his sincerity was evident as he declared, “This is good news. You have my permission. Of course you do. And since Mercy is my only child, my shipping business will be yours one day anyway. Actually, I would like to retire and Elizabeth and I can live quite comfortably on the interest of the account you set up for my family. Draw up the papers and I’ll sign over what is left of my company to you.”

  “However you wish to do it. I want you to know I will always take good care of your daughter.”

  “I have absolutely no doubts about that.” With difficulty, he sat up and asked, “Elizabeth, do you know where I put my attaché case?”

  “Yes, it’s right over here.” She disappeared for a moment and then came back with the large leather bag.

  “Good. There is a black toy horse in there. Can you get it please?” She pulled out the toy horse and looked at it questioningly, as he said, “Give it to Addison.”

  She handed it to him and he took it with a smile and then turned to her father and simply stared at him for several moments before saying in a voice choked with emotion, “I cannot believe you got this for me.”

  “I saw it in the toy shop window, and I just had to get it for you. Better late than never, right.”

  “That seems to be the motto today.”

  “I know it must seem silly to you. But you can just save it for my grandchild.”

  “I’ll give it to your grandchild, but what you have given me in this gift, you could not begin to imagine. I wanted that horse desperately. I wanted it so desperately that I thought about stealing it, but I just couldn’t do it. I heard a voice tell me that if I worked hard and did what was right I would get it someday. I listened to that voice, and now I know it was the Lord speaking to me. He has watched over me, and protected me, and provided for me, even when I didn’t know it was Him. Now I know. I told my own father about that horse, and I wanted him to buy it for me, but he never did. But now God has brought me you as a father. You will be my father now.”

  He turned and looked at her mother who frantically wiped at the tears streaming down her face. He took her hand and said with deep feeling, “And He brought me you as a mother. Thank you for having Mercy and raising her to be my wife. She is everything I’ve ever wanted. I have a family now. I belong.” He pulled Mercy to his side and gazed up at her as he said tenderly, “Without even knowing it Mercy, you have shined like a lighthouse and brought me to a safe harbor. I have found my safe harbor.”

  Mercy’s heart burst with love for Addison and she brought his head to rest against her chest as she stroked his hair. “My family’s lives were in turmoil being tossed to and fro in the storms of life and God has used you to help us find that safe harbor as well.”

  Letting out a soft laugh, he replied, “We are off to a good start, being lighthouses together already.”

  ****

  Daisy’s pretty face scrunched up into a frown. “Are you sure this church allows negroes?”

  “Yes, I promise. And you look beautiful in that dress, Daisy.”

  “Thank you. But are you sure Mr. Berkeley doesn’t mind if I come to church with you?”

  “Silly, he’s the one who told me to invite you. He wants you to come to church with us. I want you to come to church with us.”

  “Is it a good church?”

  “I’ve only been once, but I thought it was wonderful and you will too. Let’s go or we’ll be late.”

  As they went downstairs, Addison waited at the doorway with a beaming smile. “Well, look at the two of you. How pretty you both are.”

  Mercy held out the lovely lavender fabric and spun around. “You like it?”

  “Yes, I do.”

  “Thank you for buying it for me. Thank you for buying all of my dresses.”

  “And mine too,” Daisy added.

  “My pleasure.” He lifted both elbows with a charming smile. “Shall we go?” He escorted them through the falling snow to the sleigh where Cecil and Jane sat waiting, while holding little Royce.

  When they got situated, Mercy asked, “Can I hold him?”

  “Certainly,” Jane proclaimed with relief. “He is getting so big, my arms get tired.” Mercy took Royce and he smiled at her while he reached up and played with her hair.

  Addison chuckled and then whispered in his ear loudly enough for everyone to hear, “You know Royce, I wanted to do that the first time I met her too, but you can get away with it because you are just a baby.”

  Everyone laughed and then Mercy kissed Royce’s little hand and said dreamily, “I want one.”

  Jane patted Addison’s shoulder. “ That is exactly what your fiancé said when he held him.”

  Mercy looked at Addison intently. “You will be such a good father.”

  “I hope so. And you will be a good mother.”

  “I hope so too.”

  With amusement Cecil interjected, “Well first things first. When exactly is your wedding?”

  “Saturday, April seventh,” she answered quickly.

  Cecil teased, “Why are you making poor Addison wait that long?”

  “I always dreamed of a springtime wedding reception in my garden and it’s only a little over two months away. It takes that long to make a wedding dress anyway.”

  Addison put his arm around her and kissed her cheek. “She is worth waiting for.”

  Soon, the sleigh came to a stop and as they entered the church Able Cotton walked toward them with a concerned expression. “Did you hear that Ian Magregor escaped? He attacked the guard and the poor man may not live. Magregor’s hanging was supposed to be in a few days. I am surprised they waited this long to hang him, but it had something to do with paperwork. But now look what the delay has done. That madman is on the loose.”

  Mercy’s heart began to race as Able continued, “I don’t think Magregor would be foolish enough to show his face around Boston, but I just came from warning Sarah Guiness. Poor little thing. Magregor never showed any care to her
or the baby, but you never know what he will do.” He looked at Addison. “I gave her some money and she said you already gave her some. That was nice of you.”

  Mercy’s eyes shot up to Addison’s face. Part of her was glad he wanted to be generous to a poor girl that needed help, but part of her wondered why he’d kept it from her. Was he going to see Sarah Guiness as Ian had? She didn’t want to believe it.

  Addison nodded and said to Able, “Thank you for letting us know. We best get inside out of the snow.” Addison’s strong hand gripped her arm and led her away to a private corner of the church. “Mercy, please don’t look at me that way. I heard about this young girl and how she’d been abandoned with a child. My heart went out to her. I dropped an envelope with a little money off at her mother’s tavern, and I spoke with the girl for less than two minutes. I should have told you, but I didn’t want to do or say anything to remind you of Magregor. I know you have been betrayed in the worst way and it must be hard for you to learn to trust again, but you can trust me.”

  “I do. I trust you.”

  “Good. Now let’s find a seat.” As he led her toward a pew, she tried to settle her racing heart. She desperately wanted to trust Addison, but she’d been stupid and gullible once before. She’d handed Addison the broken pieces of her heart. If he betrayed her, he would smash these broken pieces into powder. But she couldn’t think that way. She wouldn’t allow herself.

  The pastor walked to the pulpit and began to sing Amazing Grace and Addison leaned over and whispered, “I love this song.”

  She nodded. “Me too.” She sat next to him, holding his hand as his deep voice boomed out the words. She stifled a chuckle when she realized how horribly out of tune he sang. He glanced down at her and whispered, “What is it?”

  Shaking her head, she whispered back, “Nothing.”

  “Tell me,” he insisted.

  She felt a little bad telling him, but she patted his arm and said, “Did you know you are tone deaf?”

  His brows knit together in a frown. “Tone deaf? I’m not tone deaf.”

  “Well, actually the fact that you are tone deaf means you cannot tell you are off key.”

  He stared at her thoughtfully for a moment and then shrugged. “Oh, well.” Then he continued to sing as loud and off key as ever. Oh, how she loved this man.

  The pastor gave a sermon about Joseph and the power of forgiveness which he showed when he granted his brothers mercy, when they deserved judgment. The message touched her deeply, but throughout the sermon she noticed the muscles in Addison’s strong jaw clenched and unclenched and she knew the news that Ian had escaped put him on edge. She didn’t blame him. It put her on edge too. Ian certainly wouldn’t be stupid enough to stay around Boston, but just the thought of him out on the loose unsettled her.

  As they filed out of the pew, Addison leaned down and said, “Listen, Mercy, I don’t want you to go anywhere by yourself until Magregor is caught. Not even your yard.”

  “But he might never be caught.”

  “I just…I don’t have a good feeling about this.”

  “Well, I’m sure he is long gone.”

  She could see him chewing on the inside of his cheek, then his eyes narrowed as he shook his head. “I don’t like this.”

  Later that night, Mercy stood by the window looking outside at the falling snow, and the clock on the mantelpiece chimed eleven times and she groaned out loud at the reminder of her stupidity. Well, that part of her life was over. Old things had passed away. All things had become new.

  She climbed into bed and smiled as she remembered how Addison sang so off key. He was truly adorable. The hinges on her door creaked, and she sat up expecting to see either Daisy or her mother. Instead she saw Ian. Before she could scream, he lunged across the room and placed his hand over her mouth and then quickly pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket and gagged her. “Shhhh, my love,” he cooed. “You can tell me all about how much you missed me later, but for now, I think I will leave this on.”

  She kicked at him and when her leg came around it knocked over a vase that came crashing to the ground. He grabbed her shoulders and whispered harshly, “That was not smart. Now if anyone comes in here I will have to hurt them.” He pulled out another handkerchief and tied her hands together, and sure enough Daisy came running into the room and her eyes widened in terror. Mercy’s gaze flew up to Ian’s as she shook her head made frantic noises past the gag. Her heart leapt in horror as she saw Ian’s fist heading toward her face, and then a piercing pain exploded as blinding lights twinkled in her eyes…and the world faded away.

  ****

  Addison placed his Bible on the nightstand and leaned over to blow out the candle. A smile came over his face as he thought about how he would only be sleeping alone for two more months. It most certainly would be the slowest two months of his life. He sat up when he heard a commotion going on downstairs and he jumped out of bed and ran toward the noise to investigate. “Wake him up, then,” he heard a gravelly voice yelling.

  Addison came around the corner to see his poor butler shaking in fear at the wrath of the Creed’s bear of a footman. Addison called out, “What is it?”

  “My name is Barry. I’m the Creed’s footman.” In a panic he declared, “Magregor kidnapped Mercy. He came into her room and gagged her and tied her up. Daisy heard the struggling and came in to investigate and she saw Magregor punch Mercy so hard that he rendered her unconscious and then he hit Daisy. He split her lip, and knocked her out, but she came to and watched them leave on a grey horse…bareback. She woke me and here I am. I ordered your groom to saddle up two horses before I came in here. Go get dressed. I’ll meet you outside. Hurry before the snow covers their tracks.” Addison felt a cold and prickly fear shiver down his spine. But he needed to remain calm. When he turned to leave, Barry called out, “Mr. Berkeley, do you have a pistol?”

  “Yes.”

  “Bring it.”

  ****

  Mercy’s eyes fluttered open and a blinding pain made her shut them again. Her head must be broken. Never in her life had she felt such pain. A swaying motion caused her stomach to lurch. Was she on a ship? Ships made her sick. With a violent heave, the contents of her stomach came spewing forth. “Mercy, what did you do that for? You got puke all over my boot.”

  Who did that annoyed voice belong to? Forcing herself to open her eyes she saw the ground swaying precariously under her dangling fingertips. Her hand just hit something. In the moonlight, she could barely make out a horse’s leg. She wasn’t on a ship. She was on a horse. Upside down. Her hands were tied together with a white handkerchief. “I need up,” she somehow managed to say.

  “All right,” the annoyed voice came again. The swaying stopped and strong hands jerked her to where the world was right side up again. She blinked rapidly trying to bring this confusing world into focus. She sat sideways on a horse, but why? Almost incoherently, she muttered, “Where am I?”

  “You are on an adventure with me, my love.”

  Slowly things became clear and a tightening fear squeezed at her chest. A madman had kidnapped her. Carefully she asked, “Ian, what do you plan to do with me?”

  “You want me to tell you now and spoil the surprise?”

  She glanced down at herself and groaned in mortification. “I’m in my nightgown. I’m freezing and sore and sick. My head hurts.”

  “I’m sure you feel horrible, my sweet, but soon I’ll make you feel much, much better. I’m taking you to my cabin. We’re almost there.”

  “I’m in my nightgown.”

  “I’m aware of that. I have plenty of money. I’ll buy you new clothes.”

  “Where did you get money?”

  “Don’t you worry your pretty little head about that.”

  “Ian, you said if you escaped, you wouldn’t come back for me.”

  “I know, but I knew you would miss me too much.”

  A slicing pain shot through her temple, and against her will, her head topp
led over on his shoulder. His arm wrapped around her and his hand slid up and down her waist. “That’s my girl. I knew everything would be all right between us.” The man was insane. Totally and completely insane. But she hurt too much to even move…let alone argue.

  She began to shiver from the cold and from the fear and revulsion that raced up and down her spine. Through chattering teeth, she asked, “Can I wear your coat? I’m freezing.”

  “No. I’m cold too. We’re almost there.” Soon Ian jumped down from the horse and carried her toward a cozy looking cabin by a lake. The moon reflected off the still water and the canopy of fragrant pines swayed in the breeze. At one time she imagined living somewhere like this with him and being deliriously happy. Oh, what a fool she’d been. He carried her inside and placed her on a chair and then began building a fire. She looked around at the sparsely decorated, but charming little home and asked, “This is your place?”