Dirty Little Virgin: A Submissives’ Secrets Novel

by Michelle Love

  The darkness closes in on me and I want to cry but can’t manage to do it.

  Is this how it will end for us…?

  Chapter 9

  CYPRIAN

  His body is blue as they pull him from Cami’s stomach. The cord is wrapped around his little neck and he’s not moving. I want to fall down on my knees and beg God to take me instead but I have to stay strong for my wife.

  “Is he?” I manage to get out.

  A nurse takes me by the shoulders and sits me in a chair. “Wait here, Mr. Girard. We don’t know anything yet.”

  I can’t take my eyes off the little blue baby as they painstakingly unwrap the cord wound around his neck and shoulders. I don’t know how he managed to get himself all wrapped up like that.

  They all handle him so roughly, yet his body is limp in their hands. The last bit of umbilical cord is taken away then the doctor hands him off to the pediatrician and his staff.

  Unable to get up as I feel weaker than I ever have. I watch as they take him to the waiting clear bassinet with the large light above it and start doing things to my son.

  The pediatrician turns to look at me. “Come here and call to him, Mr. Girard.”

  I get up and go to find my baby boy still blue and unmoving. Taking his tiny hand with one finger, I say, “Hey there, Colton. This is your daddy. I’d love it if you’d wake up for me. You see, your mommy and I have a bet going about the color of your eyes. I say they’re going to be blue and she says they’re going to be brown. If you could open them then I could tell your mommy she was wrong and I’m right.”

  The slightest feeling of his hand gripping my finger has me looking at the doctor. His stethoscope is on Colton’s tiny chest. “I hear something. Keep talking.”

  “Colton, your mommy would really like to wake up and find your sweet face looking back at her. If you could just come on home to us, we promise to love you forever and ever. Just come on and take a breath, buddy. Daddy’s here. I’ll always be here for you, my little man.”

  With an eerie coughing sound, I step back as the doctor puts something in my son’s mouth to suck stuff out of his throat then he picks him up and I hear his tiny cry. “Come on, Colton!” the doctor says as she jostles the tiny kid around.

  “Colton, come on,” I say, then hear the whole room full of nurses and doctors calling my son’s name.

  “Colton! Come on, Colton!”

  His cries grow louder and I’m amazed to see the blue of his skin turn to red then fade into pink. His arms are flailing and his body is arching as the doctor lies him back down and a nurse hands me a pair of scissors. “Time to cut the cord, Daddy.”

  I have to wipe the tears out of my eyes to see well enough to do such a thing and cut my son’s cord. Before I know it, they have him all bundled up and he’s handed to me.

  Holding him and watching him breath is like a miracle to me and I kiss his forehead. “Daddy loves you, son. Daddy loves you so much. Thank you for coming back to us. Thank you.” His eyes open just a bit as he seems to be looking for me. “Blue! I knew it.”

  I turn to look as the doors to the OR open and a man comes in with a bag of blood. “I’ll need at least two more. Have them ready,” Cami’s doctor tells the man who puts the bag up on the IV stand and leaves as the nurses get it going into her IV.

  Carrying the baby with me, I go back to Cami’s side and see her looking paler than I’ve ever seen her. “She’s lost a lot of blood?”

  “Yes, she has. She was anemic already. I knew I would have to give her more blood. I had her sign papers on it the other day when I was doing her last check up.”

  “You sure did a number on your mommy, little buddy,” I whisper to him and find a nurse tapping my shoulder.

  “I’m sorry. We need him back for a little while,” she tells me.

  Reluctantly, I hand him to her, kissing his little head before he leaves my arms. I watch her carry my son away and know in my heart he will be the only child I ever see born.

  I could never ask Cami to do this again. Taking her hand, I find it limp and wonder if she’ll ever really be the same person she was before.

  Who can come back after all this…?

  Chapter 10

  CAMILLA

  Cyprian stands close to Colton as he blows the candles out on his third birthday cake. I watch them as they laugh and my heart fills with something completely unexpected.

  I want another baby!

  My husband is dead-set against another baby. I get it. I do. And I was too, at first. But with Colton being three now, I can see he needs brothers and sisters and I feel the need for more kids too.

  Cyprian sets our son free to go play with his cousins. Catarina makes her way to me with her new daughter in her arms. Maybe that’s why I want another baby. A girl would be nice.

  “Jasper asked if we could take Colton with us for the night. He has a present for him at home he forgot to bring,” she says as she gets to me.

  Plucking the baby out of her arms, I say, “That actually sounds perfect to me. You see, I want to have a serious talk with my husband and having Colton gone for the night would be great.”

  With a plan forming in my head, I run up to the bedroom to get rid of the drawer full of condoms Cyprian has kept filled these last three years. He’s vowed never to plant his seed in me again. But I’m not having any of that nonsense!

  CYPRIAN

  “Have you gone insane?” I ask my wife as she sits on the bed in a cute little nighty asking me to get her pregnant.

  “How is a wife asking her husband for another child considered insane?” she asks me with a pouty bottom lip.

  “Um, did you forget the hell you went through?” I ask her as she clearly has. “Let me remind you.”

  “No,” she says as she holds up her hand. “I don’t want to be reminded. This will a brand new experience. No worrying about anything. We simply stop using protection and if it happens it was meant to be. That’s it. No pressure at all.”

  “Except the pressure put on me. You see, I’m not proud it was me who made you go through all of that.” I sit on the bed next to her and stroke her pink cheek. “It hurt me, baby.”

  “I got over it,” she says. “Please, Cyprian. Please.”

  “Begging won’t help. I remember it all too well.” I get up and go to the nightstand to get out a condom. “But I will satisfy that need you have.” Opening the drawer, I find it empty. “Cami!”

  “I threw them out.” She pulls the thin spaghetti strap off one shoulder and rolls it, seductively.

  “You shouldn’t have done that without talking to me first. I’m telling you, I don’t want to see you like that ever again. I felt terrible the whole time.”

  The other strap is pushed down and her tits pop free as the silky thing falls to her waist. “Please, Cyprian. Let’s just forgo the condoms. I’d love to feel your silky skin inside of me again.”

  “Damn it!” I shout as my cock springs to life with her words.

  “Don’t you want to feel me again?” she asks as she bites her bottom lip and looks all cute and sexy.

  Her hands move like stealthy spies as her eyes hold mine. The deep blue back to them. It took months for the color to come back to them. It took a solid year for her body to come back to what it was before the hard pregnancy and she wants to go back to that hell?

  My pajama bottoms pool at my ankles as her hand moves over my cock. “Cami,” I moan as she strokes me.

  She stands up and her nighty falls all the way off. “Cyprian,” she moans back at me.

  Moving slowly down my body until she’s on her knees in front of me, I tense as her mouth moves over my cock and her fingers tickle my balls. “Baby. Don’t make me do this to you.”

  She moans as she takes me into her mouth and runs her tongue along the underside of my throbbing dick. I’m putty in her hands before I know it. Just before I pour myself down her throat, I pick her up and toss her onto the bed.

  A growl fills the air
as I turn animal and find myself feeling lusty and hot for her. “You just remember, you asked for this.”

  “I will,” she says as she holds out her arms. “Come to me, baby.”

  So, I do as she says and thrust my unsheathed sword into her and hope I don’t kill her this time around…

  Epilogue

  CAMILLA

  Watching Cyprian swing our twin daughters as Colton pushes his new baby brother in his stroller, I think about how different things turned out. The first pregnancy was a nightmare and the next two were easy as can be. Even with the twins.

  Cyprian was worried for nothing and he’s already talking about trying for another baby in a couple of years. His fear is long gone, as is mine. Seems things ended up working out.

  Funny how that happens. As for the rest of our family, we all were shocked when Cyprian’s father told us he’d gone to Vegas and gotten married. We were really shocked when the woman he brought to meet us turned out to be Cyprian’s mother, Coco.

  It seems the two found love for one another as they came one long weekend to watch our kids for us, so we could take a bit of a vacation alone.

  No one was happier than Cyprian to see them happy together. He always had an empty spot inside of him, thinking he was conceived not out of love, the way our kids were. To find his parents did have love, eventually, made him feel a bit more whole.

  The man Cyprian was before he and I began this dance of a life, is no more. There are tale-tale signs of him now and again. But only in the bedroom. His sexual antics never get old.

  The gym in our home was replaced with a toy room. He still exercises but nowhere near as vigorously as before. With the kids taking so much of his attention, he found hours-worth of exercising took time away from them.

  He’s a devoted father and husband. His head never turns when other women walk by, the way I see some husbands do. His mind never seems to wander to a place that asks him, what if.

  My husband sewed more than his fair share of wild oats. I’m not sure how to feel about that, exactly. Am I happy I don’t have to worry about him skirting around behind my back?

  Of course.

  Am I happy my husband has such an extensive collection of former lovers?

  Not really.

  However it all happened, it all worked out in the end. My husband isn’t the man he was when we met. He’s evolved into a real man. A man of substance. A man I know I can count on for anything and everything. A man I can devote my life to and have.

  Cyprian is my world and I believe he always will be.

  CYPRIAN

  Another baby on her hip and our latest daughter makes us a family of seven. With five kids, Cami and I have decided to stop there. But who really knows how things will go?

  Life with a family is so much more fulfilling than the life I had pre-Cami. I barely remember that life. A lot of disco lights and heavily made-up women are all I can recall about that time.

  “Look, Dad,” Colton calls out to me as he tosses his little brother a baseball.

  “Great job!” I call out to Camden when he catches the ball.

  He holds it up like it’s a trophy and beams his bright smile at me. “I got it, Daddy!”

  Cami comes and sits next to me on the swing I hung up on one of the large oaks on the property. The kids love to play outside and we spend the majority of our time out here. Her shoulder brushes mine as she places the baby on my lap. “Go see Daddy for a minute, Candace.”

  A blur of pink feather boas flashes past us as the twins, Callie and Caylie run away from little Cody as he chases them with a frog. “You girls better hurry,” I tell them. “He’s gaining on you.”

  They squeal and pick up their speed as their little brother makes a diabolical laugh. “I’m coming to get you two!”

  “He can be so creepy,” Cami says as she leans against my arm and tickles the baby’s chin, making her laugh.

  “Can’t they all?” I ask with a chuckle.

  My family is large, loud, boisterous, and I wouldn’t have them any other way. Times have changed for me. For the better.

  When I look in the mirror, I don’t see the man I was, I only see the father and husband Cami molded me into. A man I can say I’m proud to be. A man, my family can depend on.

  It seems things did turn out happily, after all. I got things I never knew I wanted. I got a life I never wished for. I got it all and I never had to ask for it. Not even once.

  And that has me wondering what else lies in store for me. What other kinds of miracles might occur? What other things could happen that I’ve never thought about before?

  The world is an odd place. Full off different ways to live and love and I was fortunate to get to experience this life, with Cami and the kids. A thing I never knew would make me so damn happy.

  Looking at the family I have, I have to thank the Lord above for the happily ever after he gave me. He knew what I didn’t, all along. I was made to be a father and husband over anything else. I have evolved into a man I didn’t know resided within this body of mine.

  I have been reconstructed, and I couldn’t be happier about that!

  THE END

  Preview of my next “Single father, virgin” story

  Norah, a beautiful, young graphic designer, is convinced her boyfriend Lucian is having an affair but as yet hasn’t been able to prove it. Miserable in her relationship, she throws herself into her work, and through it, meets an enigmatic billionaire, Giacomo, who hires her to design the marketing campaign for his new tech. There is an instant attraction, but Norah is determined not to sink to Lucian’s level and denies herself, even when Giacomo makes it clear he wants her.

  Meanwhile, after a terrible tragedy, Giacomo is trying to convince his best friend, Orlando, a single father to a young daughter, to get back into the dating game. Lando is unenthusiastic …until he meets Zulika, a feisty young photographer with whom he bonds. But Zulika has her own demons to overcome, not less the fractured relationship with her brother, Lucian, who is cheating on Zulika’s best friend, Norah.

  When she finally discovers the truth about Lucian’s infidelity, she is shocked to find his lover is supermodel Tara Hubert—Giacomo’s fiancée. Realizing that Giacomo has also discovered the affair, she starts to spend more time with him after they both end their relationships. Soon, things become sexual and Norah wonders how she could ever have settled for anyone less than this gorgeous, sensual man.

  But both Lucian and Tara are infuriated by the discovery of their betrayal and both plot their revenge in very different ways—ways that may split apart more than just one couple. Can Norah and Giacomo’s love survive the ferocity of their ex lovers’ anger, and just how far will Tara and Lucian go?

  The phone’s shrill ring broke across the bookstore. Zulika waved the receiver.

  “Lucian,” she yelled across the room. Norah didn’t notice the man, sitting at the corner table and the way he stiffened at Zulika’s words, his attention caught. Norah grinned at Zulika as she took the phone from her.

  “I’ve told you before, me Norah, him Lucian.”

  Zulika poked her tongue out good-naturedly at her friend.

  “Ha ha.” She walked away, swatting Norah’s butt with her hand.

  “Hey you,” Norah glanced at the clock on the wall of the bookshop.

  “Hey, doll.” Lucian sang cheerfully, “It’s Friday, work’s out, and I’m in the mood for some quality time with you. Are you going home soon?”

  Norah grinned, caught up in his mood. He sounded more cheerful than he had in months. And wanting to spend time alone with her? Rare, she thought to herself, what was up with him? But she didn’t want to waste his good humor.

  “Yeah, very soon, just gotta clear up some stuff– then I’m all yours. You cooking?”

  They both laughed. “Pizza it is then.” Norah said, “I’ll pick it up on the way home. Have we got beer?”

  There was a pause. “Well, we did until last night.”

  She roll
ed her eyes. “Ok, hey, did Ziggy eat his breakfast?” Ziggy was their ancient St. Bernard crossed with a barrel on legs. Lately, he had stopped eating so much.

  “Yep, all of it.” Lucian sounded like a proud daddy.

  “Oh good, ok, be home soon.”

  “Love you.”

  She hesitated, then smiled. “Love you too.”

  Norah went back up to her little office above the bookshop. Her freelance graphic design company – consisting of just Norah and her uber-organized work ethic – was beginning to take off, and she found herself spending less time in the bookstore she ran with her almost-sister-in-law and best friend, Zulika. It was a blessing and a curse, she thought now, as she glanced through the endless emails she’d received. As much as her first love was art and design, she loved the laid-back pace and friendly atmosphere of their San Francisco store, and now that Russian Hill was an up and coming “hip” area, their clientele had tripled in the three years they had been opened. The store, all dark wood bookshelves and large comfortable couches, had added a coffee machine in the last year which had drawn many people in and they had recently expanded into the empty store front next door, and added tables where writers could sit and work. Ziggy also took up residence, making friends with the customers and their dogs.

  Norah, at twenty-eight, was competing her Ph.D. in Graphic Design part-time, as well as working, and sometimes the work seemed overwhelming. She wondered if she had missed the signs that her relationship of five years with Lucian Hargity was beginning to unravel, whether it was her fault for working too hard. She’d even said as much to Zulika – Lucian’s step-sister – but Zulika had merely rolled her eyes. “If my brother can’t handle a successful woman, that’s on him, not you.”

  Zulika and Lucian were not close, but Norah and Zulika were, and so, Zulika put up with her brother. Her mother had married Lucian’s father after both being widowed, but the marriage had been a disaster and lasted less than five years. It had cost Zulika’s mother her health, and when she had died, Zulika went to her best friend for comfort: Norah. The two had met in college and become as close as sisters; they’d earned the name “the twins” because they were always together. Looks wise, the only thing they shared was their long dark hair; Norah, with the dark beauty inherited from her Indian mother, dark brown eyes, and soft, warm smile, was tall and curvaceous, whereas Zulika, her sapphire-blue eyes large behind black-rimmed spectacles, was athletic and slender. They shared a silly sense of humor as well as sharp intelligence and street-smart and, despite never being apart for long, they enjoyed each other’s company.