Happily Never After

by Bess George

“Hello, yourself.” Kelsey smiled.

  “I’m Marge. I heard Bode leave earlier.”

  She entered her next pose. “He went to the office.”

  Marge threw her head back and gave a loud laugh. “Wow, and he left you here all alone? I’m impressed. I don’t think I ever saw a woman still here the next morning.”

  “It sounds like you know him pretty well.”

  “Not as well as I’d like too. I’ve lived here for a year now, and Bode is the talk of the neighborhood. All the single women want to be the one to tame him.”

  “You, too?”

  “Oh, I tried, believe me.” Marge grinned. “But he let me know up front that it’s all about the job for him. He doesn’t do commitment. Period. Take my advice, honey. Heed the speech if you don’t want to get your heart busted.”

  She didn’t respond but continued to do her stretching and breathing exercises.

  The nosey neighbor leaned across the fence a little further. “You did get the speech, didn’t you?”

  “No, no speech.”

  “Oh.” Marge frowned. “Well, maybe this time it’s different.” The woman’s doubt came across loud and clear.

  Kelsey used her years of experience as a prosecutor to keep every emotion concealed. Inside, she felt raw and exposed. Needing to get away from this woman, she strolled toward the door as Marge called out to her.

  Not bothering to say goodbye, she waved a hand over her shoulder and went in. She sat on the sofa to think. How could I have been so stupid? Yesterday her decision to throw caution to the wind seemed like such a bold idea. Now it felt more like a nightmare.

  Caught up at the moment, she’d fooled herself into believing she could handle a one night romance. Men did it all the time, so why shouldn’t she indulge in a one-night fling? It was her bad luck that instead of leaving this morning, she wanted to wrap herself around him like a vine. Without any sense of self-preservation, she jumped into bed with him and had given away a small piece of her heart.

  He wasn’t interested in a relationship with her. Hadn’t he shut down and bolted at the mere mention of her doing laundry?

  Bode didn’t fake his pleasure last night, of that she was positive, but maybe that was normal for him. The emotion in his chocolate brown eyes had convinced her they had a connection. She didn’t have any experience with relationships. Why did she believe she could deal with the consequences of casual sex?

  There was no way she would stay here for a repeat performance of his cold shoulder. She rose to her feet, resolve in place. Be the one to leave before he has to ask you to. Don’t make the man spell it out. Bile rose up in her throat as old insecurities bombarded her.

  First, she needed to call David about the fire. She hummed while she waited for him to answer.

  “David, it’s Kelsey.” Pulling the phone away from her ear, she listened to his yelling until he wound down. People in this town seemed to know what everyone else was doing. She should have known he’d get a phone call right away.

  “Okay, I’m sorry I didn’t call you. Things were hectic, and I forgot.”

  “Forgot? A person forgets to cancel a lunch date, not let her brother know that her apartment caught on fire. Where are you, anyway?”

  One arm wrapped around her midsection, hoping to hold herself together. You can do this. You’re not a child anymore. She swallowed the ache in the back of her throat.

  “I spent the night with Bode.” She winced at the sudden silence on the line. The urge to run and hide was almost unbearable.

  “I see. Is he there with you now?” David’s voice sounded tight. “Let me speak to him.”

  “Uh, he went to work this morning.”

  “Come on out to the house and we’ll talk.” He paused and his tone gentled. “Kels, don’t become attached to Bode. You’ll get hurt. He’s got too much relationship baggage.”

  She howled with laughter. “Yeah, I realized that when he raced out of here like his hair was on fire. Don’t worry about me, David. I’m a big girl who carries around a trunk full of her own luggage. I’m not looking for happily ever after. Listen, I’m going over to Ann’s for some girl talk. I’ll call you later.”

  The need to leave before Bode returned made her rush around gathering her few possessions. After backing her car out of the garage, she paused just long enough to make sure the door rolled back down.

  While she drove, she strove to hold back tears. She was a grown woman and had taken the release and comfort that she needed. Bode never lied to her or made promises he didn’t intend to keep. Any issues would be hers to resolve.

  At the community center, she went straight to Ann’s private residence. She crumbled when her friend opened the door and hustled her inside without a word.

  Wrapped in one another’s arms, the smaller woman rubbed her back offering comfort. For as long as she could remember, Ann was her sounding board. After a few minutes, she pulled back and looked at her friend. “I spent the night with Bode and now I think it was a terrible mistake.”

  Ann’s smile was gentle. “You’ve always been so guarded with your emotions. Maybe it was time for you to loosen up a bit.”

  Her mouth opened twice before she could continue. “Did you hear what I said? I spent the night with someone I met a few weeks ago.” She got up and began to pace. “I don’t know what I was thinking.”

  “Well, sit down and let’s sort this out.”

  They sat side by side on the sofa holding hands, and she told Ann about the apartment fire and how she went home with Bode. “Okay, let me have it. Tell me what a fool I was for sleeping with him. Tell me what an idiot I am for believing we had a connection.”

  “Kelsey, there’s not going to be anything for me to beat up if you continue to do it for me.”

  “You don’t understand. I believed that I could do casual but when morning came, I didn’t want to leave.” She hesitated. “I’ve fallen for the guy. Hard. It will shred me up inside to hear him tell me he doesn’t like me that way. Or even worse, not tell me, and just disappear from my life.” She waited for her friend's censure.

  Ann didn’t speak for a moment as if weighing her words. “Kelsey, I love you like a daughter, so I’m going to talk to you as such. In the real world, the decisions we make regarding who we’re attracted to aren’t always logical. As they say in the movies, our heart wants what our heart wants.”

  Kelsey moaned and held her head in her hands. “But why after all these years would that fickle organ decide to want someone who doesn’t want me?”

  Ann jumped up and placed her fists on her hips. “You listen to me, little girl. You waited your whole life to meet your special someone. Are you sure this was a one night stand for him? At the hospital, it was evident he was concerned.”

  “He’s a cop, of course, he was concerned. You should have seen him this morning. He couldn’t wait to get away from me. Can I sleep here tonight? I need to shop for clothes and find another room, but I just can’t today.”

  “You should talk to Bode,” Ann replied.

  Her cell phone began to ring and when she read the caller ID she sighed. “Speak of the devil. I might as well get this done. Hello, this is Kelsey.”

  “Where are you?”

  “Look, I know how busy you are so I got out of your way.”

  Loud breathing sent his anger crashing across the phone connection. “We agreed that I would follow you to David’s.”

  His icy tone made her wince, but she wouldn’t back down. “No, that’s what you said you were going to do but I decided to do something else.”

  “Okay, Kelsey. What’s going on? When I left for the office, you were going to wait for me. Now, let’s try this again. Where. Are. You?”

  On the verge of a new bout of tears, she was amazed at her calm tone. “
I met your neighbor Marge today and realized how little we really know one another. Last night was a mistake, but now we can move on. I hope this won’t affect our friendship because I think you’re a great person. Thank you again for helping me with my apartment.”

  She ended the connection and turned back to her friend. The tears could no longer be denied.

  Chapter 16

  Bode slammed the phone down on the desk and cursed under his breath. She is going to drive me freakin’ insane! This morning she was all sexy and tousled from their night of lovemaking, and now they were back to being friends.

  He chewed the inside of his cheek in irritation. When Kelsey remembered to mention that someone was following her, it had scared the crap out of him. Hallucinations wouldn’t hurt you, but a live man was a different story. The mere idea turned his insides liquid.

  She was upset with him and for good reason. When she started talking about the domestic chore of doing laundry, he panicked. His lip curled back in self-disgust. She’d asked for some detergent, not a commitment.

  Their night together had been unbelievable. For the first time in years, he’d had an emotional connection with a woman. A connection he didn’t want. So he used work as an excuse to put distance between them. Good job, Einstein. Now you’ve got all the space you need.

  He stared down at the documents on his desk. The first thing he’d done at the station was to pull everything he could find regarding Kelsey’s shooting. No doubt about it. Otis Warren was dead courtesy of the seven bullets police put into him.

  His fingers riffled through the papers until he came to the second photograph. Bingo. Miles Robbins was Warren’s brother and the resemblance was striking. What would he want with Kelsey?

  Steve entered the room and glanced at him in surprise before stopping to get coffee. He finished and strode over to Bode’s desk. “What are you doing here instead of the motocross race?”

  Cripes. He’d forgotten all about the race. After one night with Kelsey, his brains were already scrambled. Abruptly standing, his leather chair screeched as it slid back. Reaching the coffee pot, the reflection in the chrome base mocked him. His hair stuck out in places where damp palms had run through it.

  “I decided to get some work done instead. How about you?” His voice didn’t reveal an ounce of his inner turmoil.

  Sitting at his desk, Steve lifted his head from the paper in front of him. “David asked me to come in and go over the report on the fire in Kelsey’s apartment.”

  What the—

  “Why didn’t he call me?” His annoyance was evident even to his own ears.

  Steve’s gaze was curious. “I don’t know. Maybe he figured you’d be doing something else, like say a motocross race you’ve been talking about for months.”

  Uncomfortable with his partner’s scrutiny he changed the subject. “What does it say?”

  Steve sat back and crossed his arms over his chest. “It was arson. A small stack of soaked rags seems to be the starter. A canvas of the neighbors turned up a group of teenage boys wandering around that afternoon. We’ll start tracking them down. Bad luck for Kelsey they choose that particular garage.”

  Bode frowned and returned to his desk. “Maybe it was bad luck and maybe it wasn’t. Look at this.” He handed the photo to Steve.

  “Who is it?”

  “That is Miles Robbins, brother of the late Otis Warren. Warren was the man who shot Kelsey. He approached her at the park yesterday but ran away before speaking with her.”

  Steve’s head came up. “He followed her from Texas?”

  “Looks like it. Now someone set her apartment on fire. It could just be a coincidence.”

  His partner scoffed. “He left Dallas and just happened to land in Redding. Those odds are worse than winning the lotto.” He picked up the phone. “I’ll get people out on the streets looking for this guy.”

  Bode tried to work, but the memory of Kelsey last night returned. After the fire, the vulnerability in her face had gutted him. Masculine possessiveness coursed through him at the memory of her gaze when she gave herself to him.

  The tips of his ears heated over his actions this morning. He shouldn’t have left her the way he did. She didn’t deserve to be treated that way. He would go find her and apologize. Then they could put it behind them and hopefully remain friends.

  Who was he kidding? She’d rattled him by saying their night together was a mistake. The most incredible night of his life had occurred. He didn’t know if he would be able to stay away from her. But how could it ever work between them?

  He’d lost everything six years ago. The desire to be a cop again was the one thing strong enough to break the grip of alcohol. He dragged himself out of the bottle one painful day at a time. This job was everything to him.

  Kelsey wanted a home and a family. He didn’t think she even realized it, but he’d seen her face while she interacted with the children. He wasn’t the man to give her that even if she wanted him to be. Which she didn’t. She’d made it clear. I don’t date cops. Ever.

  The urge to skip work and worship her beautiful body this morning had blindsided him. What made him break out in a sweat though, was the idea of her being gone for good.

  Wait a minute! What did she say? She met Marge and realized last night was a mistake. How could something so right between two people, be wrong? He reached for his phone and dialed Marge’s number.

  She picked up on the second ring. “Hello?”

  “Hey, Marge, this is Bode. Did you see someone at my house this morning? I tried to call, but no one answered.”

  “I did talk to your friend. She’s gorgeous, by the way. I heard her leave a while ago so the coast is clear.”

  It didn’t take a detective to figure out the topic of their conversation. He gnashed his teeth together. “You didn’t by any chance chat about my love life did you?”

  Her laugh was low and sexy. “Now, Bode. Don’t be mad at me. As you cops like to say, don’t do the crime if you can’t do the time.”

  “Yeah, thanks.”

  He hung up the phone and his jaw clenched tighter. Their lovemaking had been off the charts, but the natural banter they shared eased a loneliness he hadn’t realized was there.

  An hour later he drove across town in a foul mood. The fire, Miles Robbins, and his own inept handling of the morning gave him a short fuse.

  Honest with himself regarding his shortcomings, he admitted he had caused this problem by shutting Kelsey out. The smart thing to do would have been to scoop her up and make love to her all day.

  Instead, he’d left her standing there, hurt and confused. He was going to rectify that. She might laugh in his face and tell him to get lost, but he’d have his say first.

  There were two places she could go. He would check the community center first. The way his luck was going, he’d have to drive over to David’s. Facing an angry brother would be icing on top of an already craptastic day.

  He got out of the truck and stormed to the back but came to an abrupt stop. Kelsey was on the basketball court shooting baskets with none of the life that had radiated from her the first time he saw her play. A fist squeezed his heart at the sight of her. He stalked across the pavement and whirled her around to face him.

  “Yeah, I’m an idiot and a jerk, but I’m not letting you just throw this chance away.”

  He caught her head in his two hands and lowered his mouth to cover her own. This kiss wasn’t the gentle one he’d intended. The emotion bottled up inside erupted, and he claimed her lips.

  After a start of surprise, she raised her arms to go around his neck and kissed him back. Relief swamped him, and he hoped his knees weren’t about to buckle. He ended the kiss and put his forehead to hers, his breath coming in ragged gasps.

  “I’m sorry I acted like such
an ass this morning.”

  She pulled back, and her sad eyes made his insides twist. “I don’t think I can do this. I won’t survive the fall,” she whispered.

  “Kelsey. What’s between us is different. You’re different. I’m different. Being with you is so good, it scares me to death. Please don’t give up on me, on us. I can’t offer you any guarantees for tomorrow. But don’t you think we should at least try for today before we pull the plug?”

  Indecision flitted across her face. She lowered her gaze but didn’t move away. He needed to tell her. He had to say the words and hope she understood why he couldn’t make any promises.

  His breath hitched as he got ready to open old wounds. “I told you that when I was with SWAT, I killed a woman.”

  Her head whipped up and she gripped his forearm. “Oh, Bode. You did what you were trained to do.”

  He nodded. “I know that now. Time has helped me deal with my guilt, but like I told you, I turned to the bottle. I couldn’t stop re-living the moment my finger pulled the trigger until I drank enough to become numb. My fiancé, Elaina didn’t understand what I was going through. She kept telling me, you’re a cop, just deal with it.”

  Kelsey stared at him with eyes that held too much understanding. “People who haven’t experienced it can’t know how hard it is to get past such a tragedy.”

  “I came home one day and found her in bed with Eric, my partner. She was lonely and he was there to offer her comfort. It wasn’t her fault, I’m the one who shut her out and spent night after night floating in a bottle.”

  “That’s a load of bull.”

  Her sudden fierceness startled him. “What?”