Smash: A Stepbrother MMA Romance (Includes bonus novel Rock Hard!)
Page 20
I shrugged. “I guess I wanted to hurt him more.”
Ronnie sat down next to me, shaking his head in disbelief. “Man, you fucking went toe to toe with one of the best standing strikers in the game. Then you break his fucking arm and you complain that you didn’t hurt him enough?”
How could I explain it to him? I always felt like this after a fight. The incredible rush of the violence was suddenly gone and I missed it, would do anything to get it back. Fighters were constantly chasing a high that they could never truly achieve, because in the ring they were too busy fighting for their life to appreciate it, and they could never get that same experience outside the ring.
And then suddenly there was someone standing in front of me.
“Uh, Cole?” Ronnie said. “You got a visitor.”
I looked up.
Everything suddenly seemed okay.
Alexa smiled back at me. I got to my feet. “Hey,” I said.
She threw her arms around me, hugging me tightly. It hurt in a thousand different places, and I grunted my pain, but I grabbed her and held her tighter.
There was the thrill I had been missing.
All of the emotions I had repressed for so long came flooding back. All of the anger and resentment and fear, but also the love, the fucking love. I felt her body crushed against my own bruised and broken torso and knew that I’d never stop fighting, because she was going to be with me.
She pulled back slightly. “You look like shit,” she said.
“Thanks.” I moved back farther, looking at her seriously. “Listen, Alex. Everything is going to be okay. I’m ready to give you the divorce now.”
She bit her lip, frowning. “Are you serious?”
“I’m serious. No more fucking around. Get me the papers and I’ll sign them.”
She stared at me for a second and then threw herself at me again, crushing her mouth against mine. It hurt like a fucking bitch, but it also felt incredible.
I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her back.
The room went fucking dead silent. I didn’t care, though, as I kissed her roughly and passionately, knowing that it was all finally done and we were finally making it real.
“Uh, guys?” Ronnie said.
We broke apart, but the only thing I could see was her. She smiled slightly, looking right into my eyes.
“So that’s a yes?” I asked. “On the divorce. Just so I’m clear.”
She hit me and laughed. “Whatever you want, asshole.”
“You know there are like ten cameras in this room and everyone is staring at us, right?”
She slowly turned red. “I know.”
“And we just did some crazy shit to hide this?”
“I know.”
I grinned. “Why now?”
“Because I don’t want to hide. Not you, not anymore.”
I looked up at the room. “Everyone get the fuck out,” I said loudly.
There was a slight murmur. “Man, I’m not sure—” Ronnie started to say.
“People,” I yelled. “Fuck off. Now.”
Everyone slowly filtered out of the room. Alexa was grinning like mad, and Ronnie was shaking his head.
“You should be nicer. These people can help your career,” he muttered as he followed the others out.
When the room was clear, I looked back at Alex. “Just me and you now.”
“Yeah. It is just me and you.”
I pulled her against me. Pain lanced up my body, but I didn’t care. She looked incredible in her dress, like she was born to wear it.
“What now?” I asked.
“Now,” she said, grinning devilishly, “I’m going to be real gentle.”
She kissed my lips, soft as could be.
Chapter Nineteen: Alexa
Fourteen months later
The wind was crazy as I made my way back toward the apartment. I was a little breathless and my feet were killing me, but I felt incredible.
For the first day on the job, I did pretty damn well.
The wind gusted again, and I had to steady myself against a light pole. People brushed by, some of them staring, and I shook my head.
They didn’t call it the Windy City for nothing.
As I made my way down the block, my head was still reeling from my first day of work. Sure, I was only an editorial intern, but I was getting paid a decent amount, and I got to work on an actual news program. WCNJ was only the local NBC affiliate in the Chicago area, but it was still an amazing job.
And I never would have done it on my own. I’d had help, lots of help, and there was someone waiting at home that deserved a little thanking. I could feel myself getting wet already imagining exactly how I’d pay him back for being so damn patient with me.
Finally, I gave up the treacherous hike and hailed a cab. Five minutes later, I was climbing out into a much less crowded neighborhood. I paid and tipped the cabbie and watched as he drove off, smiling to myself.
Our place was on the second floor of a converted row home, basically a second floor walkup. It wasn’t glamorous or huge, but it was absolutely perfect for the two of us.
I unlocked the door and hiked up the stairs. I pushed into the apartment, looking around with a big smile on my face.
“Hey Co—” I said, stopping short.
“Hi, sweetie.”
“Dad!” I ran over to him and threw my arms around him, hugging him tightly. “What are you doing here?”
He laughed. “What, can’t I visit my daughter?”
“Of course you can. But I thought you were still back home?”
He pulled back and shrugged. “Well, retirement has suited me well, I guess. I can travel whenever I want and nobody can say a word.”
I smiled, shaking my head.
So much had happened since the fight over a year ago. So much had changed, and yet it felt like nothing really had. Dad stepped back and looked around the apartment.
“Really nice place,” he said.
“Not as nice as home, but it’s good.”
He smiled. “Cole said he’d be back soon. He has a surprise for you?”
“I don’t know anything about it.”
He laughed and took a seat at the tiny kitchen table. “Well, tell me all about it.”
I sat down across from him and started to speak.
It was hard to believe that my dad was retired. I still imagined him as the serious businessman running meetings and making important decisions. Now, though, he was all about playing golf and spending as much time with Cindy as he could.
That was even harder to believe, actually. Even after the scandal had broke about Cole and me, Cindy and Dad had stayed together. They weathered the storm, and although Dad was forced to go into retirement to save the company, Cindy and he seemed better than ever.
I felt horrible about that. I hated that my decisions forced my father to retire when he didn’t really want to. I knew kissing Cole that night was selfish and stupid and impulsive, but I didn’t think about the consequences. There was only Cole and how badly I wanted him.
We got slammed in the media. The relationship between stepsiblings was bad enough, but it was quickly unearthed that the two of us were married. Needless to say, it was a huge deal. Dad was pissed, and Cindy gave us the cold shoulder. But slowly they began to accept our relationship and the ice began to thaw.
It wasn’t easy for anyone. The press had a freakin’ field day with the whole thing. My favorite headline was “Tech Kids Shack Up For Months of Sweet Fornication,” and that wasn’t even the worst one. I was called some pretty nasty things in the tabloids, but I tried my best to ignore it.
Cole had wanted to go out and fight every single reporter that said a bad word about me. He didn’t, of course, but his frustration was palpable.
It all blew over eventually. The weeks turned into months and people pretty much forgot about us. I went back to school and graduated with decent grades. I kept my nose in the books and pined for my fighter boyfriend pretty much e
very night. I spent time with Lacey when I could, but she was much more social than I was. Meanwhile, Cole’s fighting career began to take off as he fought and won some pretty high-profile opponents, all because of his win over Trent. For his part, Trent did honor the contract, though he didn’t really need to at that point.
“That sounds amazing, honey,” Dad said as I finished telling him about my first day at the news station.
“I know. I never really saw myself working for a news program, but here I am.”
“It’s really great. Honestly. And Chicago is an amazing city.”
“Cold though,” I complained.
I was used to the ideal California weather. I hadn’t known what real snow was like until we moved to Chicago.
“You’ll get used to it.”
Suddenly, the door rattled and pushed open. I watched as something that looked like a giant plant stumbled in through the door, kicking it shut behind him.
“Cole?” I said, laughing.
“Drowning here,” he grunted.
Dad got up and helped. Cole grinned boyishly as they placed the flowers and cake box down onto the kitchen counter. It looked like he had bought an entire florist.
“You didn’t need to do this,” I said.
“What, not celebrate my wife’s big day?”
He threw his arms around me and gave me a quick kiss. I wanted much more than that, but I figured it was the best I’d get with my dad hovering over us.
It felt weird to still be married. We sometimes talked about signing the divorce papers, but we just never got around to it. We had meant to at first, but life quickly got in the way. It was easy to forget about when we were together all the time, basically like we were married anyway. Even when we were long distance when I was in school, it didn’t matter at all.
We were in love. I was head over fucking heels for him, despite everything.
Maybe one day. Or maybe one day we’d have a real wedding, not some fake one that we didn’t even know was real.
“Well, what did you get me?”
He showed me the flowers and the cake. They had spelled my name wrong. “How do you misspell ‘Alexa’?” Dad grumbled, but it was still incredible.
Cole had no problem moving out to Chicago with me. Even though the center of his fighting life had been California, he was able to work in any major city because of his growing popularity. He was working on an undefeated record of 15-0, and we were more than comfortable financially because of it.
My job was more of a dream. I never knew what I had wanted to do up until I found the posting on a job site, and I just had to have it then and there. Cole wrote me an uncharacteristically sincere recommendation letter and supported me through the whole process.
Not to mention he uprooted his life and followed me out to an entirely new city.
“Well, let’s celebrate,” Cole said, popping open a champagne bottle.
“Here’s to Alexa,” Dad said. “And to you, Cole. May you guys have as much happiness as you both deserve.”
I smiled. “Thanks, Dad.” We clinked glasses and drank.
The day wound down that way as we sat around and chatted, catching up. Eventually Dad got tired and decided to head back to his hotel room. We promised we’d see him tomorrow and watched him climb into the cab.
When he was gone, I collapsed onto the couch, right into Cole’s arms.
“Long day?” he asked.
“Yeah, long day. And when did my dad get here?”
“About an hour before you got home.”
“How was that?”
Cole shrugged, kissing my neck. “Not bad. I didn’t tell him that we spend most of our time fucking these days.”
“Cole,” I said, giggling. “Cut it out.”
“You know it’s true,” he whispered in my ear.
“So what?” I turned and looked at him. He smiled, and I felt myself sigh, my head dizzy, light and free. I kissed him gently on the lips.
“I love you, dickhead,” I said.
“I love you too, wife.”
I laughed and kissed him harder, pressing my body against his.
Maybe not many relationships began with a marriage. Maybe even fewer began as stepsiblings. But I wouldn’t have traded what we had for anything in the world.
Because every day I was with Cole felt better than the last.
As I let myself get lost in his body, I knew things were going to work out.
He was my husband. Maybe it was just a legal thing, but that was meaning more and more. Because of him, I’d had the strength to go after my news job, to move across the country for it. He made me stronger, more likely to live in the moment.
And he did other things for me. Things I definitely wasn’t telling my dad about.
Cole the fighter, my man. I was going to last with him, one way or another, from now to always.
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My life is crumbling all around me. My dad is dying of cancer, my job barely pays the bills, and I have crushing student loans hanging over everything.
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Keep reading for the full text of Rock Hard!
Prologue
He’s just down the hall. And I know exactly what he wants.
It’s the same thing he wants every night. I keep thinking about his skin, his tongue and his lips running down along my spine, his callused fingers slipping below my panties, teasing shivers through my body.
I hated him for a while. I wanted him even more than I understood.
Now, our parents can’t know. Nobody can. Not when there is so much at stake, much more than just our reputation.
It’s our lives.
And it’s not just that he’s my stepbrother. There is so much more than that between us, so many people threatening everything we know and love. But he’s always there, his strong hands holding everything above him.
When he comes, the door to my room rattling softly, I’m always wide awake. I can’t sleep when I know he’s so close by. He slips into my room like a shadow, closing and locking the door behind him.
“You’re always breathing so deep,” he whispers into my ear as he presses his warm, muscular body against mine. I suppress a moan as my fingers roll down his defined abs.
His lips press against my neck. “I’m not going anywhere,” he says.
I grip his muscular arm. I can hear the house creak around us. I keep imagining the deep forest, trees and scrub brush jutting up against the windows and straining to get in, trying to swallow us up. It’s half dream and
half desire. I want nature to reclaim me, to be wild and free, to let him do whatever he wants with me. His body is soil and musk as he presses me down onto the mattress.
“Did you even want to get away from me? When you heard what I do, did you think that I’m a monster?” The stubble along his cheeks rubs against the nape of my neck. His fingers roam down toward the soaked spot between my legs.
I don’t want him to stop.
All it takes is a door. One open door and everything between us goes spilling out into the open. And we both know we can’t survive in the open.
We live out near the forest. The deep forest. The trees there are bigger than anything I can imagine and ancient like the feeling that drives me to bite his bottom lip. We could disappear into the forest so easily, swallowed up by time and space.
“Some part of you wants to get caught.” His voice is low and throaty, thick with desire.
I arch my back and gasp as his skilled fingers find their mark.
My mind blanks as waves of intense pleasure roll through me.
“Reid,” I say, over and over.
“Morning is a long way away,” he whispers.
I hope it never comes.
Chapter One: Rebecca
I first saw Reid Conway in third grade. He was the new kid in town, just moved to Ridgewood with his single mom from the big city. I’d lived in town my whole life, and any change in a tiny place like Ridgewood was bound to make a splash.
He was quiet back then. He’d always been serious, but back then he wasn’t popular yet, hadn’t grown to well over six feet tall and hadn’t gotten all that lean muscle all over his fit body. He was just a little kid when we first met.
We didn’t talk until years later, not seriously, at least. I felt bad for him in those first few months and went out of my way to say hello, but that was really it. Still, I noticed him, and wouldn’t stop noticing him as we grew up. I wasn’t the only one, of course. When it became clear how extraordinary Reid was, people flocked to him. He grew out of his shyness as soon as he hit his growth spurt and girls started throwing themselves at him like crazy.