Cowgirl

by Nance Sparks

  Breathing a huge sigh of relief, Aren answered, “Yes, I do get mail out here. It’s been a long time since it was anything but fire starter, but I still have a mailbox.”

  “Have you been living out there all this time or did you just get back in town?” he asked.

  “I’ve been out here all this time. I’m finally tackling the inside of the house and realize I don’t want to keep most of it. I’ll have to gut it and start over.” Aren had never been this open with a stranger before. She shook her head. Being around Carol was changing all kinds of things.

  “Well, good. I hope everything works out for you. I’ll have a truck deliver the container sometime today. Take care and let us know if you need anything else.”

  Aren thanked the man and shook her head, smiling. Well, maybe ol’ Maggie had been right. Some from the old days did remember. She called the power company next, and that proved much more difficult. After some kind words and lots of convincing, she arranged to have the electricity turned on later that day as well. She’d have to give the driver a deposit to prove she was better than the account history, but she figured she’d get it back in a year when they reevaluated the account.

  Satisfied that the two calls she needed to make were complete, Aren closed the phone book and put it away. She thought about the house, if she was going to do this, she needed to make it her own, all of it. New paint, new carpet, fix what was broken and make it the start of a new beginning. She wanted it gutted, especially the floors.

  Before she’d left for college, Aren recalled helping Ron cut down an old stand of oak trees that were at the end of their life. They’d cut the trees down and pulled them out of the woods with the old tractor. Then, he’d had a company come out and mill all that wood into one-inch-thick planks. It had filled an entire bay of the garage. Ron had loved to woodwork, but she didn’t see anything new in the house that he might have made. Maybe he’d sold it all when times were tough.

  Deciding to find out, Aren walked into the living room and went through the door that connected the house to the garage. Ron’s old pickup truck was still parked in his spot closest to the door. The other bay was empty, less a small set of shelves that held oil and antifreeze. Aren climbed up the old wooden steps that led to the large loft above the garage, where Ron’s workshop had been. Dust and spider webs covered everything. She smiled when she saw the huge stack of raw oak slabs just beyond Ron’s old, rusted tools. Now, she had new flooring for the entire lower level.

  Aren called out for Bailey on her way back to the front door. There was a lot of work to do, but she was excited to get started. Excited to start living again. The more time she spent with Carol the more she wanted her to stay. She was beautiful and open and exactly the kind of woman Aren could fall in love with. Now that she had a walking boot and more freedom, she could start pulling her own life together, and Aren hadn’t had the courage to ask what she’d been thinking about her future. She’d been content to let things flow and see what happened, but the more time they spent together, the more she wanted something…more. Was it worth taking a chance on opening her heart? She wasn’t sure yet, but she wasn’t about to put it aside, either. She and Bailey headed back to the loft to return Carol’s phone.

  Chapter Thirty-one

  Aren was cleaning the last of the box stalls when a sweet floral scent caught her attention. She dropped the scoop of the littered straw into the wheelbarrow and set down the stall fork. Carol walked up the aisle and she looked amazing. The dress hugged her figure perfectly, yet she looked professional, like she was headed off to work. Her hair lifted a bit with the crosswinds in the barn, making her look almost ethereal. Aren couldn’t take her eyes off her.

  “Wow, you look great. What are you all dressed up for?” Aren came around the wheelbarrow to stand in the aisle. She didn’t want to get too close since Carol definitely smelled much better than she did.

  “I’m applying for a job today. There’s an opening at the library in town. Can you believe it? Honestly, does the boot look completely silly with this dress?” Carol twirled around.

  “I think you look absolutely beautiful, boot and all.” Aren couldn’t help but stare. She looked stunning.

  “You’re sweet. Well, I’m off. Wish me luck.” Carol pulled the car keys from her purse.

  “Good luck.” Aren watched Carol walk to the car. She caught herself praying that Carol would get the job. Then, she’d have a reason to settle here and call this home.

  Aren finished up in the barn before she ran over to the main house to open the gate. The truck delivering the dumpster should arrive anytime. She was kind of glad that Carol had errands to do today. She wanted to have some time to sort through a few things on her own.

  When the truck arrived with the dumpster, Aren was glad she’d chosen the biggest one because even it looked small for all the stuff she wanted to toss. While the truck was sliding the dumpster off the slanted rails, the power company truck pulled in. Aren signed all the forms and gave the guy the deposit money before he would reconnect power. She was really doing this. A little anxiety crept in with the excitement, but excitement won. It was time to move forward. It was time to start living again.

  Aren wanted to get to work and fill the dumpster immediately. Action had become her habit, so she stopped and stood still for a second, forcing herself to slow down. She walked into the living room and removed three of the four photographs from the wall. She wasn’t sure she’d ever hang them, but she wanted to save these memories. She set the framed photos on the counter.

  She made her way up the stairs, to Jennifer’s room. There were a few photographs taped up on the wall that she wanted to save. Aren took her time looking at the pictures. She could hear the laughter they often shared. She thought about how good it had felt to have someone finally know her, really know her. Jen had opened that world up for her and she would always be grateful for that. She started pulling the photographs off the wall, saving a few off to the side, memories that made her smile, memories that deserved to be saved. It was time for the rest of them to go. Time to let it all go and say good-bye.

  An hour later, Aren stood in the doorway looking around Jen’s old room, the walls bare. She thought about Carol. Carol would have grabbed her hand or wrapped her arm around Aren. She would have asked if she was doing okay. Aren realized how much she’d grown to like that. Carol would poke and prod, ask her how she was feeling. Did she have words to explain that right now? Such a mix of emotions. Excited and scared, then grateful came to mind, and sad too, but there was something else. Acceptance. Maybe there was finally some acceptance. She picked up the few photos she wanted to save and made her way back downstairs.

  It was time. Aren looked at the chair in the living room that Phyllis always sat in. Stains surrounded it where drinks had spilled over the years. Aren picked up the chair and carried it out to the porch. She heaved the chair into the dumpster, and it crashed down on the other side with a great deep metallic thud. It felt good, therapeutic. She went back in for the couch. It was much heavier than she expected. She plucked off the cushions and launched them off the porch, into the trash container. She tugged and dragged the couch out the door and onto the porch, tipped it up on end, and heaved it up onto the side of the dumpster. Finally, the weight of it shifted, and it teetered on the edge before falling in with another loud thunderous boom. She ran back in, grabbed the photo of Daniel off the wall, and threw it in. She heard the glass shatter upon impact. Wow, that felt great! She worked her way around the living room, saving some pieces that could be refinished and launching the rest. Before long, she wrapped a bandana around her face and began the daunting task of pulling up the living room carpeting. She’d brought down the portable radio from Jennifer’s room and had a country station playing while she worked. She used her chore knife, cutting the carpet into long runs and then rolling it up and throwing each section out into the dumpster.

  While taking a short break and enjoying a cool glass of water from the n
ow running tap, she took in the wallpaper. It had been on the walls for at least forty years. She picked at a corner and found it barely stuck. She began pulling off sections of thick fabric-backed paper and found it much easier to remove than she expected. Before her break was over, she had most all the wallpaper peeled off, less a few stubborn areas. There was still some glue on the walls that would have to be sanded or scrubbed off, but that was easy enough to tackle.

  Aren was in the kitchen staring at the carpeting when Carol walked through the front door, a confused expression on her face. Aren turned down the radio on the island.

  “Well, this is a surprise. This is the last place I expected to find you. You ordered a dumpster. Holy shit, look at this place!”

  “It’s time, Carol. I’m doing it. I’ve decided to clean it up, fix it up, make it mine. A little elbow grease, some paint.” Aren looked around the room, seeing the possibilities.

  “It’s so unexpected, after yesterday,” Carol said, walking from room to room. “Look at all you’ve already done. This is great!”

  “I thought about it all night. I’m actually excited about it.” She dusted herself off. “Thank you, Carol, you helped more than you’ll ever know. I’d hug you, but you look amazing and I’m a filthy mess.”

  “You look great, Aren, even when you’re a filthy mess. So, would you like help? I can get changed and be right back. Or is this something you’d like to tackle on your own?”

  “I already tackled the part that I needed to do on my own. There may be others, but I’d welcome your help. Thank you though, you’re very kind to consider that. By the way, how did it go at the library?” Aren took a sip of her water.

  “There was indeed an opening and I was able to talk with the director. She’s very nice. I submitted my application and résumé. Fingers crossed I hear something soon.” Carol’s eyes lit up.

  “Did someone move or retire or something?” Aren asked.

  “Moved, because her husband lost his job. I never dreamed there would actually be an opening. They were just about to start a nationwide search. Some people applied and were even hired, but then turned it down because their spouse couldn’t find work with it being such a small town. Talk about things falling into place when something is meant to be!” Carol looked so happy she could burst.

  “Things falling into place when something is meant to be, I like the sound of that,” Aren said.

  “So, when did you set this up? You’re sneaky. We only talked about it yesterday,” Carol said. She walked over and opened the refrigerator. The light inside popped on and she could hear the humming of the electric motor. “The power is on!” She squealed.

  “I borrowed your cell phone and called for the dumpster and the power early this morning. I hope that’s okay. I’ve realized a few things about myself, since you’ve been here. The loft helped me get through a dark time, but I feel like I’m maybe coming out the other side finally. Being in here, looking around, it’s funny but I’m starting to see a blank canvas. I no longer see total darkness. I don’t feel that torment nagging at me constantly. I’m actually excited!” Aren smiled, “I’ve even decided to put in hard wood floors. I’m pulling up this carpeting and with the stuff I’m finding beneath it, well, let’s just say I’d like a clean surface to walk on. Here, you’ve got to see this.”

  She took Carol up to the loft above the garage and showed her the wood and the router table. She explained her idea for creating beautiful flooring.

  “Then all there is to do is sand, stain, and seal the floors. It’s all right here waiting to be put to good use. We’ll pick out colors for the walls and see if you can paint as well as you can ride.” Aren smiled.

  “I’m so excited to work on this with you. I finally feel like I can help you with something.” Carol’s eyes darted every which way, taking it all in.

  Aren looked around the kitchen too and then looked into Carol’s sparkling eyes. She’d already helped her so much more than Aren could ever express. She took a sip of water to control the emotions that suddenly welled up.

  “Let’s go to the loft so I can get changed. I bought deli subs as a treat. I put them up on the loft table. I figured you hadn’t eaten yet, but I assumed you’d be in the garden.” Carol spun around in a circle again. “Wow, I’m still in shock! Please tell me that I can have kitchen rights! I’m giddy at the thought of cooking something for us, just you wait!”

  “You have unlimited kitchen rights.” Aren smiled.

  She looked around the house and while it was in an early stage of transition, she felt like it was possibly the final stage too. Ever since she’d purchased the farm from the bank four years ago, she worked hard to claim it as her own. She fixed up the barn so it would last another hundred years. She mended fences and created pasture rotation to keep the land healthy. So many changes made this her land, her farm, and now it was time for this one final change. It was time that she created a home, a permanent place where new memories could be made and shared. This land didn’t always have to be remembered as the ol’ Harris farm, now it would be one hundred percent her farm.

  Chapter Thirty-two

  The August heat had been setting in with temperatures in the nineties for the past few days. Even with the straw insulation, the loft had been sweltering in the evenings. Carol had just returned from an interview with the library staff. After changing into shorts and a tank top, she walked out to the garden looking for Aren in the early afternoon sun. She believed her interview had gone well and was eager to share her good news, but Aren wasn’t there. She felt the sweat dripping down the sides of her face while she continued her trek around the barn, calling out for Aren. She noticed the cows lying lazily beneath a shade tree quietly chewing their cud. Wyatt, Doc, and a few of the other horses were also beneath a shade tree standing side by side, swishing their tails to keep the biting flies at bay. She could see the pigs enjoying the cool waters of the pond. It amazed her how fast the little piglets had grown in the last month or so.

  Not able to find Aren in any of her usual places, Carol headed for the house. She walked in through the propped open back door and was still amazed at the transformation they’d been able to accomplish in just a few days. The house smelled clean and fresh, having lost the musty odor after some good scrubbing. Carol walked into the kitchen, noticing instantly the renewed effort Aren had put into cleaning the blood out of the plywood subfloor. Though for all her effort, the shadows were still visible. She wondered if Aren saw Phyllis’s body each time she walked past that section of flooring. She wondered if she felt the stinging tinge of torn skin. Carol had never seen anyone hurt beyond a small cut. She hadn’t had to identify her parents after their car crash. Aunt Suzie had done that for her. She’d only seen violence and death on television, and while gruesome, it wasn’t someone she’d known personally.

  Carol was startled to hear footsteps coming up behind her from the dining room. She was so lost in the visions of Aren’s past that she hadn’t even heard a door open. Carol smiled when she turned and saw Aren come around the corner with an armload of milled flooring ready to nail in place.

  “How’d the interview go?” Aren asked while kneeling to set the large load on the floor.

  “It went terrific. I think I’ll get the job. They all seemed to like me.” Carol pulled her attention away from the speckled floor.

  “What’s not to like? I bet they find you irresistible and will be begging you to come and work there!” Aren stood and stretched her back. “Come with me, I have something to show you.”

  Aren took Carol’s hand and led her down the hall. The door to the horrifically smelling room was wide open. The room was now void of all the previous contents, including the carpeting. The walls were scrubbed clean and free of cobwebs. The old drapes were gone, allowing sparkling clean windows and screens to let the sunshine in to illuminate the renewed space.

  “This is amazing! You did all of this in the few hours I was gone? I can’t believe it’s even the same s
pace!” Carol exclaimed, twirling around in circles to take it all in. “Oh my God, where did the French doors come from? Were they always there?”

  “They were hidden behind the bed with blackout curtains. I opened them up to empty out the room. I think I’ll get a lot of use from them, don’t you? There’s a great view of the pastures from that deck.” Aren opened the doors and walked outside. “Do you think it’s weird, me taking Phyllis and Ron’s bedroom?”

  “Aren, it’s your house to do whatever you want, and if it’s your bedroom then it’s no longer Phyllis and Ron’s bedroom. You own it now. You can sleep in a different room each night of the week if you want. That said, I don’t think your wardrobe will fill a fraction of this closet. It’s huge!” Carol walked out of the closet and onto the deck next to Aren. “Oh, you’re right, it is a pretty view. Look at that, the porch is covered over here too. I think you should put the loveseat out here. What a great place to sit and enjoy the landscape. It’s nice and private.” She wrapped her arm around Aren’s waist. “So, what are we going to work on now?”

  “Well, would you mind if we went back into town? I think we’re ready for paint. As soon as that’s done, we can start in on the upstairs and then lay the floor.”

  “I think that I need to go grab my keys and purse!” Carol said, smiling while taking Aren’s hand and leading her out of the house.

  Carol ran down from the loft just in time to watch Aren put a paper bag in the trunk of the car before climbing into the passenger seat.

  “What’s in the bag?” Carol asked while starting up the car.

  “It’s a Wyatt present for my favorite cashier who should be working today.” Aren laughed.

  She explained her last solo trip into town as Carol drove. Carol was in tears from laughter by the time they pulled into the hardware store. Aren opened the door and pulled the seat forward so Bailey could jump out. She looked through the window and saw a new person at the checkout counter.