Conflict of Interest (Employee Relations Book 1)

by Teresa Michaels

  “Of course.”

  Jack ends the call.

  Neither Lucas nor I speak for a long time. Motionless, I stare at the carpet by his desk. Afraid that when I look up he won’t see how conflicted I am; he’ll only see rejection. How can I choose him?

  I want it all dammit. I want my career, I want to help my family, and I desperately want this man.

  “Congratulation,” he says. “This is huge for you.”

  I nod.

  “I bet you can move your grandmother in today if you wanted.”

  Again, I nod.

  “You should be happy, Gabriella. I know how much this means to you.”

  A lone tear slides down face.

  My eyes find his. “You mean a lot to me too.”

  He sighs and leans against the wall. “I think we can both agree it’s better to end this before it gets serious.”

  I scrutinize his expression but he gives nothing away. “Do you mean that?”

  Lucas loosens the knot of his tie that I tied this morning. “Yes.”

  His admission guts me.

  There’s no remorse or regret in his words, only the hard truth. He’s not conflicted at all.

  “Really? Because this got serious for me when you repeatedly got in my bed, stayed the entire weekend playing house with me and looked at me like I meant something.”

  “Gabriella, you know—”

  “Jesus, I’m falling for you, Lucas. Could you at least pretend it isn’t that easy for you to walk away? Clearly this was only sex to you but—”

  “Would you keep your voice down?” He runs his hands through his hair. “I’m trying to do right by you; I’d never make you choose.”

  Tiny shards of my splintered heart pierce my chest. “Doesn’t sound like there was a choice to make.”

  My throat tightens as the sensation of drowning sends me back peddling to the door.

  “Christ, Gabriella. That’s not at all what I meant.”

  “Don’t. Just…don’t. We’re done.”

  Chapter 17

  Gabby

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  Bloody hell.

  Linking my hands together over my head, I repeatedly walk the length of my office, wearing the carpet thin. Does she seriously think this is easy for me?

  I’ve seen her with her family; her love for them is fierce. Giving up everything to make their lives better comes naturally to her when it’s such a foreign concept to me. No way in hell would she choose me over them. Yet she’s made me out to be the bad guy without giving me a chance to explain.

  Admittedly my initial reaction wasn’t the best. Jack’s call took me by surprise. Knowing we couldn’t keep this up was a given, but was it naïve to think we’d be able to end it on our own terms?

  Turning, I stare out the window and grip the ledge.

  She’s falling for me.

  My head thuds as I drop it against the glass. Why did she have to tell me that? The pained look on her face when she realized what the program changes meant for us was enough of a blow without hearing those words.

  The worst part? I’m starting to think she’s not alone.

  Yesterday morning something changed. A revelation during mind-blowing sex, go figure. Ridiculous or not, my feelings towards her have been growing and for whatever reason watching the way we physically fit together became a metaphor for the two of us as a whole. We’re perfect together in all the ways that count. That was the moment I allowed myself to acknowledge that this is something more…I’m just not sure it’s love.

  Call it denial or self-preservation, but love has been a negative word for the better part of my life, and nonexistent the rest. So how can I be sure that’s what’s going on? I can’t. Especially when our priorities are destined to keep us apart.

  I’m doing her a favor by pushing her away.

  Then why do I feel like such a dick?

  I strum my fingers along the windowsill. Without a doubt I’ve screwed up. Whether or not we can be together I should at least try to make it right. She deserves better than this, to know I care about her too.

  I dash out of my office and knock on her door intending to apologize.

  There’s no answer.

  I jiggle the doorknob but it doesn’t budge. I pull out my phone to call her when Ted passes me in the hallway.

  “If you’re looking for Gabby she left.”

  Already? How long ago did she leave my office?

  “Thanks.”

  I close my office door and dial her number. It goes straight to voicemail.

  “Lucas,” Gloria, my admin bellows through the intercom. “You’re late for your meeting. Mike and Stan are already in the executive conference room.”

  A client meeting. Just what I need.

  “I’m on my way.”

  I shoot Gabriella a quick text.

  We need to talk. Call me.

  Then I send another.

  This isn’t easy for me either.

  For the first time in my entire life putting a work obligation first feels like a mistake.

  The customer meeting goes an hour longer than planned. Good news on any other day, yet the entire time I’m talking I worry that I’m not making sense. Apparently I am because as the meeting comes to an end it’s confirmed—we closed the deal. Again, I could give a fuck because it’s after 6PM and all I want is to talk with Gabriella, who hasn’t texted back or called.

  Stan shakes hands with the clients and excuses himself, leaving Mike and me to see them out.

  “Hey, man,” Mike grabs my arm. “I’m late to an appointment across town. Can you wrap this up?”

  “Not re—”

  “Thanks man.” He clasps me on the back and walks out the door before I can articulate my response.

  Fuck.

  Twenty minutes later I finally walk the customers out. Before I even formulate a plan I’m in the car driving to her apartment. Another first—I don’t even take my laptop. Making things right between us is all that matters tonight.

  I park the car, run inside and bang on her door. Music blares from within the apartment and I can hear Summer’s laughter. I knock again, louder this time.

  “Keep your shorts on,” Summer greets me with a glass of wine in hand.

  “Happy hour?” I ask, anxious to get inside.

  “For some of us,” Summer gives me a knowing look and sips from her cup. “What are you doing here?”

  “I need to see Gabriella.”

  Kyra joins us at the door. “She’s not here.”

  “I really need to talk to her.”

  They exchange a look and let me in. “Seriously, you just missed her. But feel free to wait.”

  Summer closes the door behind me and then heads back to the kitchen with Kyra.

  “Will she be gone long?” I call after them.

  “Not sure. Guess it depends on how well things go,” Kyra replies.

  “How well what goes?” I step into the kitchen and place my hands on top of the island glancing between the two of them. Empty wine bottles and shot glasses line the counter, none of which was here this morning. “Gabriella pre-gamed before spending time with her family?”

  “Who said she was with her family?” Summer replies and smirks into her glass.

  “What is that supposed to mean?”

  Summer nonchalantly lifts her shoulder. “She had plans.”

  My head jerks back at Summer’s words. Plans? Until a few hours ago Gabriella and I had planned to spend the night together.

  “With who?” I demand, my mind racing.

  “Oh no. You can sit here and suffer or you can leave. We’ve shared enough with you.”

  I nod once. It’s no surprise Gabriella would tell her friends what’s going on between us.
I’m actually shocked they let me in the apartment. I consider explaining my side but it doesn’t seem right to tell her friends things I haven’t yet said to her. Determined to fix this situation I head into the living room and wait.

  Two hours pass and she’s still not home. While I sit on the couch literally twiddling my thumbs, Kyra and Summer yack it up in the other room. The TV’s on but I have no clue what I’m watching. I’m going insane.

  Why would she drink before going out? Had she gone to a bar or club she’d have gone with Summer and Kyra. If she’s not with her family or friends, and she’s not with me that doesn’t leave too many options. Could she be out with another man? I shake the idea out of my head. The possibility isn’t a situation I can stomach.

  By 10:35PM I still haven’t heard from her and I’m a complete mess. She could walk through that door at any second and I haven’t any idea what I’ll say to her because I’m too worried about her whereabouts. I glance toward the kitchen, wondering if I should just bite the bullet and ask for their help when my phone finally rings.

  It’s not Gabriella though, it’s Ki.

  I answer before the second ring and sigh into the phone. “I fucked up.”

  Ki chuckles. “Interesting greeting. I’m guessing this has something to do with Gabby.”

  I spend the next ten minutes getting him up to speed on what’s transpired since I last spoke to him the day I left for London.

  He whistles through the phone. “Go big or go home buddy.”

  “This is serious, Ki.”

  “I’m getting that. What I can’t comprehend is how you can’t see what’s blatantly obvious to me after a brief conversation.”

  “What’s that?”

  “Jesus, I can’t believe I have to spell this out for you,” he mutters. “Let’s recap. You spend all of your time with her and it’s not enough. Works not holding your interest and sex hasn’t gotten her out of your system, if anything it’s the opposite. But instead of admitting to yourself how much she means to you, you purposely hurt her before she has the opportunity to hurt you.”

  “Could you make your point already?”

  “You’re in love, jackass.”

  “Caring about her doesn’t mean I’m in love.”

  “Then why in God’s name are you sitting in her apartment like a lost fucking puppy dog?”

  “To apologize for implying this was only sex.”

  “Bullshit,” he says.

  I concentrate on breathing as I process what he he’s said. “What if I am? We can’t be together. I’d never forgive myself if we got caught and her family suffered because of it.”

  “Sneaking around? That’s the only solution you can think of?”

  “Right now I have no idea what to do. I need…time.”

  “You need to get your head out of your ass.”

  “Thanks for the advice.”

  “Welcome. Since I’m feeling so generous here’s another suggestion. Don’t fall for what Summer and Kyra are telling you. Those girls are messing with your head. Gabby’s a good girl. She’s not on a date. If you let them get to you you’ll end up doing more stupid shit and as your friend I’m telling you I think you’ve reached your max.”

  He’s right, yet dismissing what they’ve implied is easier said than done when they’re the only source of information I have.

  “Thanks, man.”

  “Good luck.”

  I end the call as Kyra leaves and as soon as the door shuts Summer announces she’s going to bed.

  “Wait,” I call after her unable to let it go. “Tonight. Was is it a date?”

  Summer looks at me with a blank expression. “You could call it that.”

  I blink at her as an invisible fist squeezes my chest.

  Summer tosses me a blanket and heads down the hallway. I don’t take it though. Several times I try to talk myself into leaving but I can’t do it. Instead I wait until the apartment is absolutely still and make my way to Gabriella’s room to lie down on her bed. I’m completely surrounded by her scent. At any other time I might find it comforting but at the moment it’s driving me out of my ever-loving mind.

  You could call it that. Summer’s statement could be interpreted a dozen ways. Unfortunately, the explanation I latch onto is that Gabriella’s so pissed at me that she’s found someone else who she can be with, instead of someone who’s emotionally challenged and unable to date because of work related policies.

  Midnight rolls around and she’s still not home. Doubt over the sincerity of Gabriella’s declaration and what we have starts to seep in. More than anything I’m pissed at myself. I’ve said stupid shit in the past when I’ve been overwhelmed; she knows this about me. Deep down she has to know I didn’t mean what I said.

  Right?

  Attempting to answer that and a dozen other questions is what occupies my thoughts as I fall asleep.

  I wake up bitter and completely alone. Sitting up I scour the room. There are no clothes on the floor, no indication that Gabriella came home last night. Desperate, I push the covers off of me and check the living room in case she’s on the couch.

  She’s not.

  Running my hand over my face, I exhale and pull her number up on my phone intent on calling her again when I hear someone stir behind me.

  I turn to find Summer evaluating me. “You know what they say? Best way to get over someone is to get with someone else.”

  My brows pinch together. Fuck. Did I literally push her into someone else’s bed? Over a misunderstanding? No, I don’t believe that. Ki’s right. Gabriella’s a good girl, she wouldn’t tell me she’s falling for me and jump into bed with someone else.

  “She’s not like that.”

  “You sure about that?”

  “Completely.” I meet her glare head on. When she doesn’t back down I begin second guessing myself. “Do you know who she’s with?”

  “I do. Coincidentally, so do you.” She pulls a suitcase behind her and stops in front of the door. “I need to catch a flight. Time for you to go home.”

  Irritated, I grab my coat and leave. I know who she went on a date with? No one comes to mind. Absolutely no one.

  Until I get to work.

  Gabriella’s door is open just a crack, enough for me to see her wrapped in Mike’s arms, smiling. She was on a date.

  I clench my fists at my side remembering how fast Mike bolted from the conference room yesterday to get across town for an appointment. Bastard was racing off to get to Gabriella. Probably consoling her if she was ever upset in the first place.

  I impatiently wait in the hallway until Mike leaves, ignoring him as I push past him into her office. The door slams but I don’t give a shit. How could she claim she’s falling for me and then stay out with him all night?

  “That didn’t take long,” I say, my tone dripping with accusation. “I bet you couldn’t wait to rub that in my face.”

  She stills. “Excuse me?”

  Insecurity and anger combine into the perfect storm. “Where were you last night?”

  Gabriella has the nerve to look affronted.

  “Before you give me some bullshit answer you should know I spent all night waiting for you. I know you weren’t out with your friends and you didn’t come home. So tell me, were you with him?” I ask, pointing behind me to her door. “You and Mike seemed rather cozy. Is that who you were with last night? While you ignored my calls and I waited for you in your bed?”

  Her eyes go wide then narrow just as quickly. “Are you seriously jealous? Of Mike?”

  I stare at her and wait.

  “What I did last night is none of your business. And why on earth would you think you’d be welcome in my bed? You made it perfectly clear yesterday that what happened between us meant nothing.”

  “I never said our relationship meant nothing. Quit putting words in my mouth and tell me where you were.”

  Gabriella scoffs. “So now it was a relationship? Funny, I thought you said we were casual.”r />
  “Just answer the question, Gabriella. I was worried sick.”

  “My personal life has nothing to do with you.”

  “I’m not leaving until—”

  She exhales loudly. “Mike and I had something important to discuss about work just now. Satisfied?” She takes a step backwards and bends over her desk to grab a sticky note.

  I hang on to my anger but it doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate the way her dress hugs her curves. Curves Mike’s hands have no business touching.

  “That’s it?”

  She shakes her head and continues with her task. “It doesn’t concern you, Lucas.”

  I lock the door and stalk to her desk. Standing at her side I plant my fist on her desk and hover. Gritting my teeth I tell her, “I don’t care what you met with him about. Why were his arms around you? Why didn’t you come home?”

  “That doesn’t concern you either.”

  Being this close to her drives me wild. Pissed or not I can’t stop what she does to me, in fact her disregard for me has triggered a primal desire I can’t contain. Like I’ll die if I don’t have her.

  Before I can stop myself I grip her hips from behind and press against her till her legs are pinned against her desk. “I was inside you just over twenty-four hours ago. It most definitely concerns me.” Her muscles tighten under my grip at the reminder. “So tell me. There a policy change I should know about? No more rules against fraternization?” I ask. “Because if that’s the case you should know I don’t share.”

  “Share?” she laughs humorlessly. “That would imply I was yours.”

  “You are. Need me to prove it?”

  My hands push down her thighs until my fingers reach the hem of her dress. Gabriella sucks in a quick intake of air that has my heart hammering inside my chest. Aside from the brashness of my words it relaxes me to know I at least have the ability to affect her body. Before she can tell me all the reasons why this is wrong I bunch the material above her hips.

  Thank fuck for dresses and thongs.