‘Then tell me you love me… . Tell me! You must love me, Davey… . Please, please say you love me … !’ She began crying hysterically again. ‘You must tell me. You must marry me! I love you so much.’
‘I do love you,’ David lied. ‘But I can’t marry you. You don’t know what you’re saying.’ He looked hard through the darkness into her face, and shook her by the shoulders, but she persisted.
‘Then, if you love me, you must marry me. Tell me you’ll marry me! Please tell me. I’ll not leave until you tell me.’ She struggled to stand up and pushed him away, and the snow whipped around their young faces.
David grabbed her to pull her to the path and tore the sleeve on his coat, pulling it away from her shoulders as she resisted him again. He was cold, he was wet, he could hardly see, he could hardly hear. ‘Joanne, stop bitchin’ around… . Don’t be stupid … I’ll never marry anyone. No one … ! Ever … ! How can I?’
‘But I love you, Davey. No one loves you like I do. So, say it Davey … Say it, please! I beg you.’
‘I can’t say I’ll marry you. I’ll never say it to anyone. I’ll end up as reckless as my dad. Can’t you see it! Who wants a fool for a husband … ? Tell me, who?’ David pleaded. ‘Don’t you see it’s useless? It’s my inheritance. Not the farm - not Keld Head, but just evil - evil stuff. The dice is loaded against me, Jo.’
He pulled her again so hard, holding her by the wrists. He knew he was hurting her, but he didn’t care; they couldn’t stay any longer. So almost dragging her, they left the confines of the rocks and went together, stumbling and falling, down the steep path below, on to safety, back to the village and back to the warmth.
Joanne never said another word, she just cried. Some were tears of anguish, some of pain at the feel of his strong hands, grasping hard against her wrists and arms. Down they struggled, neither speaking, David with a sense of total bewilderment. He’d felt that with one more plea from her, he would have weakened. He was so close to giving up his promise for her, and it was only brute strength that saved him from a careless declaration. But now he was too tired to think anymore. His only objective was to get her to safety, back to the village and not let her go. What happened after that he couldn’t think or say.
The lights of Grasmere peeped through the white haze. The new bridge and the easy path lay in front of them. Checking his watch he realised he was late. It was 2:20 am and his mother would be worried senseless and would have already called the Mountain Rescue. If only he could shout and tell her they were safe. Just the walk across the village and then up the long and tedious lane to Keld Head, and they would be home. Joanne was still struggling, but with less defiance. But David couldn’t release his grip; he daren’t.
Grasmere was in silence as the snow falling steadily, sticking to the pavements and trees. No one to see them or hear them, no one to worry. David held on to her like a man with evil intent and, hoping all the time they wouldn’t be spotted, he walked as quickly as he could, still clutching the girl in his arms.
He could see the lights in the distance up at Keld Head. He wanted to fall to the ground and sleep.
Kathy must have heard the click of the yard gate and, as she rushed to the outside door to meet them, she saw the pitiful sight of her son with the distraught girl in his arms. ‘Oh, Davey… . Thank God you’re safe!’ She rushed to him and pulled him indoors. Linzi held on to Joanne, as she fell into her arms and rubbed her wrists, relieved to be free from David’s clutches.
‘Did you call the Mountain Rescue?’ David gasped.
‘I had to love… . We were worried. I did as you said. Don’t worry Davey, at least you’re both safe. Get your wet things off. We’ll look after Jo and I’ll ring them and apologise. Maybe they won’t have set off yet.’
David struggled to walk up the stairs, pulling his wet pullover and shirt off him at the same time, not thinking. But as he was about to fall on his bed he suddenly remembered Tony and, half-naked, almost fell back down the stairs to the kitchen. ‘Where’s Tony?’
‘He’s not here, love… . He must be at home.’
‘He can’t be at home. We arranged to meet here.’
David grabbed another coat and ran from the farm down the lane and bursting into the bungalow saw it was in darkness. ‘I can’t do this … I can’t do this … !’ He was standing desolate in the doorway, when he saw the blue flashing lights of a rescue Landrover coming up the hill.
The driver spotted David, and as he frantically waved his arms he fell exhausted onto the gate. ‘Please help. It’s my friend. He’s at Kelbarrow Tarn!’ he struggled to speak.
David felt the warm arms of his mother rest on his shoulders and she walked him slowly back up the hill, and then up the stairs into his room. ‘Come on, Davey. Come home, son.’
‘Where is he, Mum…? He should be here!’
‘They’ll find him…don’t worry…he’ll be fine.’
*
Joanne was still sobbing as Linzi took her to her bedroom. She helped her into some dry clothes and as Joanne undressed and rubbed her sodden hair, Linzi noticed the appalling bruising on her arms that she knew her brother had done. What’s this all about?’ she wondered and shuddered.
12
ROCK SOLID TRUTH
Kathy tiptoed up the stairs, not wanting to waken the young children. She was holding a hot mug of tea in her hand as she crept into David’s bedroom. He was sitting on the side of his bed with his head in his hands, bare-chested, and had a large bath towel draped over him. She sat down beside him and put her arm across his shoulders.
David leant his head on her chest; he couldn’t speak or close his eyes. Crying wouldn’t help; he’d gone beyond that. He was burdened with guilt and felt that if anyone should be lost, it should be him. One friend had almost died because of his foolishness and now he thought he was destined to lose another. He was so weak, he could barely move. No one needed to stop him from any more search and rescue; he just couldn’t do it, despite the fact that he had let his friend down, and badly.
‘You’re safe now, son. Don’t worry about Tony, they’ll soon find him. He won’t be far away.’ Kathy whispered; her face close to his ear.
David still couldn’t speak - not that he wanted to. But now at least he was able to close his eyes, if only to help shut out her words; he couldn’t believe what she was saying was true and he wanted to blame himself. He should be the one punished, not Tony.
‘Try and drink this tea. You must take in some fluids or you’ll get dehydrated.’
There was still no reply as he sat motionless.
‘I’ve rung 999. I think you should see a doctor.’
Still no reply.
Kathy tried to lift his head, but he couldn’t look at her. She put the beaker under his lips, but he pushed it away. ‘Don’t Mum, I can’t. Not until Tony’s found.’
‘I know you won’t sleep until he’s safe. But please take this drink, for my sake.’
David took the mug of sweetened tea in his trembling hands and sipped. And speaking in low tones with a voice that could melt the snow, he said: ‘I’ve done wrong by Joanne you know, and I’ve done wrong by Tony.’
Kathy didn’t reply and waited for more, but it didn’t come. ‘What do you mean, done wrong by Joanne?’
‘Don’t you see… . It’s all my fault… . If I hadn’t …’ then he paused. ‘Oh, this is all just stupid.’
Kathy sat bolt upright. ‘Hadn’t done what, David?’ She pulled his head up to face her. ‘What have you done? Have you been sleeping with her?’ She tried and succeeded to keep calm.
David couldn’t answer. He could see his mother looked confused, but for some time he couldn’t reply.
‘I’ll have to marry her now … !’ And in one bitter breath, David gave up his promise.
All types of crazy thoughts and ideas rushed through Kathy’s mind. She couldn’t understand what was happening. Linzi had assured her that nothing was going on between David and Joanne but her in
tuition told her better. And she now assumed Joanne must be having his baby. She wanted to scream at him for being irresponsible, but he looked so pitiful. She started to gently shake him. ‘David … David… . What have you done? Have you got Joanne pregnant?’
David looked at her and scowled, and thought how absurd her question was, not realising how ridiculous his answer would sound. ‘Pregnant! Why no, I only kissed the girl!’
Kathy pulled away and pushed herself off the bed and stood over him. ‘You’re just talking crazy you know that… . You don’t have to marry Joanne! You’ve got everything out of proportion. You’re overreacting. You’re beginning to sound just like your father.’
‘Oh, that’s what this is all about is it? I know you’ve all been watching me for weeks. Talking about me behind my back… . Don’t think I haven’t noticed!’
‘No … no … David. You’re wrong. That’s not what we’re thinking. I just can’t believe you feel you have to marry a girl just because you kissed her. It doesn’t make sense, unless you’re lying to me. So tell me the truth?’
‘I know you don’t understand. But this is the truth.’ David rubbed his tired eyes. ‘I will have to marry her … I led her on and it’s all my fault. She could have died up there tonight because of me, and between us we may have killed Tony. The only thing I can do is to try and put things right again.’ David raised his voice in defiance and gasped with sudden panic.
‘You will NOT marry her, David … ! And that’s that. I won’t hear any more of this nonsense.’ She had to insist.
*
In the morning when David woke up he wondered where he was. He was sitting in a plastic chair and leaning slumped over a bed. He could hear women laughing and some were whispering. Doors were banging and the noise was echoing around him. He could smell an odour that was neither pleasant nor terrible.
He tried to move, but his body was stiff; his back ached as he raised himself up from the chair. Wearing only a t-shirt and boxer shorts, he stood up and flinched as his bare feet touched the cold of the tiled floor.
Looking back at the bed, he saw Tony, lying pale and still. His red hair was sprawled across the pillows, and endless tubes and contraptions were hanging from him. Then Tony opened his eyes.
‘You’re a sight for sore eyes, Dave.’
Glimmers of memory melted the permafrost in David’s brain and he said, ‘Man, you had us worried.’
‘Where are we?’ Tony scowled with the brightness of the light.
‘In Lancaster, and you’re alive and that’s all that matters. I’ll get the nurse.’ And David stood up and walked stiffly down the corridor.
Tony drifted in and out of sleep. He was certain he’d just seen David, but he was alone again and lying in a plain white room which was brightly lit. He had a burning pain in his stomach, and he couldn’t tell if it was hunger or sickness. He also had a thirst so strong that it impelled him to look for water. He tried to feel around for a glass or a bottle, but was prevented by the tubes and pipes and a sharp needle thrust into the top of his hand taped up with Elastoplast.
Then a woman appeared; she was wearing a blue dress and had some kind of white cap or hair-band on her head. She was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Tony thought she could be an angel. She was tall and had soft, rose-coloured skin, and warm blue eyes. Her cool hands touched his arm and comforted him; his body tingled with the gesture.
He saw David again, but this time he was standing behind the woman, and looking over her shoulder. Tony felt comforted by the sight of his friend, and yet somehow he felt angry and he couldn’t explain why. He wanted to shout at David, but didn’t know what for. But this beautiful woman was interested in him, and she was ignoring David.
The nurse allowed David to stay with Tony. He gave him drops of water to sip, and held small portions of food for him. David didn’t know how much memory Tony had of last night’s events, and he hadn’t mentioned Joanne’s whereabouts in any of his waking moments so, as soon as they were alone, David wanted to let him know she was safe.
‘Do you know why we’re here?’ David leant across and whispered.
‘I know you’ve messed about with my sister and she’s probably dead on some mountain.’
The words tore at David’s conscience, because that’s exactly how it could have been. ‘No … Joanne’s safe, mate. She’s in another ward.’
‘Did I find her?’
‘No… . You had a good try though… . I found her. She was at the ghyll and in better fettle than you!’
‘What have you done to her, Dave?’ Tony didn’t understand and he sounded almost childlike in his question.
David paused. He didn’t know what to say. ‘You get some rest now. I’ll go and telephone your dad and tell him you’re awake.’
Tony couldn’t remember anything about his rescue, just glimmers of being manhandled. Then the next thing he knew he was looking at a beautiful blue-eyed girl. The answers to his questions wearied him so he shut his eyes again; his chest felt heavy and it was a labour for him to breathe. He wanted to dream again of the blue-eyed girl.
*
David rang Tony’s father, who was still in Scotland. Keith Milton was relieved to hear his son was conscious and reassured by the sound of David’s voice, prepared to make the long journey back to Cumbria. He partly blamed himself for Tony’s waywardness and knew that Tony and David had been in a few skirmishes in their life, but for Joanne to have become involved, troubled him. Keith also knew she’d been unhappy recently and he would have to make amends. He decided to take her back to Aberdeen with him, to stay with his sister to convalesce.
David had also rung his mother. He told her of Tony’s progress and Kathy was glad to hear him speak rationally again. She regretted shouting at him last night, but hoped some of what she’d said made sense. She hoped it was just ramblings from a mild dose of hypothermia that had made David say what he had.
*
‘Is there anything I can do to help?’ Hannah hung on to the receiver as she listened to Linzi’s sorry tale, and was bewildered like everyone else.
‘Could you drive us to the hospital? Mum’s up to her eyes in it and our Davey’s to be discharged.’
‘Yes, of course I can, gladly. I can probably borrow Barry’s spare car.’
Linzi hung up and looked at her mother. ‘Hannah can help, Mum.’
‘Good. Now, you keep Davey well away from Joanne, today.’
Linzi grabbed her Parka. ‘You’re overreacting again. But don’t worry.’ She zipped up her coat.
‘You don’t know our Davey at the moment, love. He’s unpredictable.’ And Kathy knew she couldn’t reveal to her daughter the truth.
*
David was at Tony’s bedside when Hannah came into the room. She found him just as she had left him – sleeping, with his dignity completely gone. He was unshaven, looked unkempt in every way, and was bare-legged and weary. He was grossly surprised and embarrassed when he woke up and saw her standing before him; he had expected his mother.
If only he’d known Hannah’s thoughts, David wouldn’t have felt as uncomfortable. She had only tremendous respect for him, because of his brave rescue of Joanne and the vigil he had kept at his friend’s bedside.
Hannah didn’t know what to say at first, but she realised that the foolishness between them must end here. ‘I’ve brought you some clean clothes,’ and she gently rested a small carrier bag down on the bed.
David saw Hannah’s uncomfortable posture and rose from his seat. ‘Please … please sit here. I’ll go and get another chair. Thank you for coming.’ He took the bag and quickly left the room.
Not wanting to disturb Tony, Hannah tried not to move, but sat quietly looking at the drips, bottles and tubes surrounding him. She was familiar with this equipment, as she’d seen it all before in the surgery, and it revealed the serious nature of his condition. It was hard for her to imagine that this was the same young man that had teased her throughout the previous ev
ening, as he was so still, but thankfully alive.
David returned, fully dressed, but still unshaven. His hair was brushed and he appeared to have more vitality and composure.
Hannah stood up.
‘No … no… . Please stay there!’ David gestured with his hands. ‘Thank you for coming. I’ve been discharged, but I really want to stay with Tony. I won’t be coming back with you,’ and he shook his head.
‘But your mum insisted!’
‘Yes … she would insist, she always does, but I don’t always listen!’ He raised his eyebrows and Hannah guessed there was a hidden meaning behind his reply which she couldn’t possibly understand.
Hannah had a dilemma, but the door burst open. It was Linzi.
David looked determined at his sister. ‘I’m not coming back, Linzi,’ he repeated.
‘Don’t be so pig-headed David… . You’re coming home, and now. Mum can’t keep coming backwards and forwards for you. Besides, Tony’s dad will be here soon and Jo needs to get home to pack.’
‘Pack, what do you mean, pack?’
‘She’s got to go to her Aunty Marian’s in Aberdeen.’
David looked at Hannah and yielded.
*
Joanne was impatient and restless; she was fully dressed and sitting with some elderly ladies in the day room; angry and perplexed at her father’s suggestion of taking her back to Scotland.
‘Come on, Jo… . It’s time to go,’ Linzi beckoned.
David and Hannah were waiting in the corridor but at the sight of them together, Joanne retreated to the day room and whispered to Linzi, ‘The staff nurse wants to speak to David.’
‘Speak to David. Why?’ Linzi just wanted to get him home, and was tired and frustrated at this unnecessary intrusion to her short break at home. She hadn’t intended staying so long at the hospital as it was. But as they were whispering, the nurse arrived. She beckoned Linzi and David into a small office and closed the door. ‘We’re just concerned about the bruising on Joanne’s wrists and arms. She said she’d done it to herself. Could that be true?’
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