Envy (The Damning Book 2)
Page 16
blinking rapidly, my neck craning from side to side.
My mates had fallen asleep around me, and I took the moment to survey
them. Bash still slept beside me, but in sleep, he looked like an entirely
different man. Peaceful. The stress of his position as a prince and a powerful
Mage diminished when he slept. His face appeared as if it was carved from
marble, and his lashes feathered against his high cheekbones like twigs of
ebony. His breathing was steady, sawing in and out.
Turning, being careful not to remove the arm around my waist, I stared
down at my feet. Lupe was clutching one of my feet in his sleep desperately,
as if he was afraid that removing his hand would be letting me go.
Silly boy. Didn't he know that I wasn't going anywhere?
That realization took me by surprise. I didn't know how to deal with it, so
I did what I did best. Bury it in the sand to uncover at a later time.
Devlin and Killian were on the opposite side of my feet. Devlin was
clutching my foot as if it was his favorite stuffed animal, and Killian was
curled around Devlin. Aww. Killian was a cuddler. It was too adorable.
I wished I could take a picture or something to remember that moment.
Jax was draped over my head, face inside my hair. I canted my head
backwards, smiling softly when Jax muttered something indecipherable,
inhaling deeply. I could've been mistaken, but it almost sounded like my
name.
Finally, I turned in my bed, meeting Dair's bright blue gaze.
"You're awake," I whispered accusingly. He smiled, blinding me with his
white teeth.
"I've been awake for awhile," he replied. He scooted closer to me so we
were nose to nose in the large bed. His golden skin was peppered with
freckles from all the time he spent out in the sun. Irrationally, I wanted to stay
in bed and count each and every one of them. I wondered if he had more on
his body, and the thought sent a thrill straight between my thighs.
"Why haven't you moved?" I asked softly. As if it had a mind of its own,
my hand lifted and began to lightly trace his features. His skin was smooth,
velvety, beneath my hand.
"I like watching you sleep," he replied unashamedly.
"Creeper." My hand caught on a shard of stone, and I tugged it out of his
hair distastefully. "How do you feel?"
He chuckled. "Shouldn't I be asking you that? You were the one who was
paralyzed."
"Yes, but you were the one who was turned into stone." I laughed,
quickly smothering it with the back of my hand before the sound could carry.
"Are we going to start comparing tragedies? Declaring winners?"
He laughed as well. "I would rather not."
"Good. Me neither." My breathing hitched as his eyes lowered to my lips.
We were so close, so painfully close, that all it would take was one inch of
movement and we would be kissing. I wanted to taste him, to decide whether
or not his lips tasted as salty as his skin. "And in answer to your question, I'm
fine."
"Me too," he whispered.
And then our lips met, and we were exchanging the lightest, most
innocent kisses imaginable. Our lips moved over one another's as if they were
meant to do exactly that. It was the sweetest kiss I had ever experienced
before in my life.
He pulled away with a simple peck to the corner of my mouth. His eyes
were alive, brightening with exhilaration and awe.
"I love you," he whispered. Another kiss was planted on my cheek. "I
love you." His lips touched my jawline before moving lower. Tiny kisses
were trailed down my neck, each one accompanied by a declaration of love. I
raised my chin to grant him better access. "I love you."
"Dair," I whispered breathlessly. "I-"
Before I could finish my sentence, a startled yelp came from by my feet. I
turned, amused, just in time to see Devlin jumping up as if his ass was on
fire. He was throwing daggers with his eyes at Killian who looked sheepish.
"Sorry," Killian murmured.
"Your fucking cock was against my asshole!" Devlin yelled in horror. His
hands reached for his butt as if he was protecting it from phantom cock. "I
felt it. Why the fuck are you that hard?"
"I'm always hard," my Incubus protested indignantly.
"Awww, Devlin, do you not want a dick in your ass? There goes my plan
for pegging," I teased lightly, and his violet eyes snapped to mine. Relief
shuttered over his expression as he practically climbed over Lupe to get to
me. He peppered my face with kisses, seemingly oblivious or choosing to
ignore Dair still kissing my neck.
"You damn, stupid girl. Don't you ever fucking scare me like that again."
"Us," a soft voice corrected. I stared over Devlin's shoulder at Ryland,
who was standing in the corner of the room. The shadows obscured his face
from view once more. “Don’t ever scare us like that again.”
Why the fuck was he all the way over there?
"Us. Me. Whatever. Don't do that shit again." Devlin accentuated the final
statement with a bruising kiss to my lips. There was no doubt that they would
become swollen.
"Yes, sir," I whispered, and his eyes darkened. Oh yes. Devlin liked that.
"I thought you were fucking dead," Bash croaked from beside me. His
hair was sleep-mussed, bags still evident beneath his eyes, but his smile was
luminescent. He interlocked his fingers with mine, but I immediately pulled
away. Hurt flashed in his eyes, briefly, before that was replaced by icy
indifference. Without a word, he pushed back the blankets and stormed out of
bed. My traitorous eyes automatically latched onto his ass looking especially
delectable in his boxer briefs.
Damn eyes.
And damn heart crying for him to come back.
"I'm sorry," Killian blurted, drawing my attention back to him. He was
now standing at the foot of my bed, eyes trained intently on me. He was
shaking, I realized somewhat distantly. His body shook with tremors, and
tears filled his eyes. "I'm sorry I couldn't protect you, Z. I'm a horrible, shitty
mate. I stupidly thought...I just don't...I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry."
I moved my eyes away from Killian's, briefly, to meet Devlin's stare. He
gave me a small nod to show me he understood.
"Why don't we give them a moment?" he suggested, and my other mates
reluctantly moved out of my bed. Lupe, Dair, and Devlin each gave me a
final kiss. Jax merely sniffed my chest, no surprise, but Ryland refused to
even acknowledge me as he glided out of the door.
What the hell was that about?
Ryland was momentarily forgotten when Lupe picked up Dair and held
him like he was a baby.
"This is humiliating," Dair murmured beneath his breath. Of course, that
seemed to be permission for Lupe to baby talk Dair as they exited the room. I
heard statements like "Do you need your diaper wiper changed?" and "Does
little Dairy need a nappy wappy?"
I snorted out a laugh, but that laughter died in my throat when I took
stock of Killian. Shirtless. His tattoos and muscles on display, so delectable
that I had to restrain myself from licking a pathway across his glorious skin.
For the fir
st time that I could remember, I was locked in a room with my
Incubus Prince.
TWENTY
KILLIAN
Iwatched her crawl to her knees on the bed, her glorious blond hair
trailing behind her like liquid gold. In her form-fitting blue dress, she
was a sight to behold. Something ethereal that I sought to worship and
love until the end of time.
Anxiously, I pulled my lower lip between my teeth. Why did it make me
so nervous to be around Z, my mate? It wasn’t just because she was beautiful,
though that could've been one of the many reasons, but because she was able
to see me. Not the me the rest of the world saw and revered, but the me I
reserved solely for my brothers.
And it scared the shit out of me.
That transparency...it shouldn’t have been normal. I had never felt more
vulnerable than I did in her eyes, stripped bare of all masks.
“What’s wrong, Kill?” she asked, nibbling on her lower lip. I couldn’t
help but smirk at the nervous gesture she displayed - a mirror image of my
own. She realized it at the same time I did and released her lip, smiling.
“Oops.”
I forked my trembling fingers through my tousled red hair, my agitation
physically manifesting itself. All I could see, repeatedly, was Z’s body falling
to the ground. The Gorgon carelessly tossing her over its shoulder. The fight
draining from her eyes, bleeding dry...
I shuddered at the images, the feelings they evoked within me. I never
wanted to feel that helpless again. Being able to see and hear everything,
unable to step in, was torture.
“I want you to train me,” I blurted. She paused, mouth partially opened as
if she was going to say something. At my words, her mouth slammed shut
and her eyes widened.
“Train?”
“Yes.” I nodded my head. The more I thought about it, the more sure I
was. Never again did I want to sit on the sidelines. To be a mere witness in
our fucked up world of predators and prey. “To fight.”
When she continued to stare at me blankly, I hurried to explain. To some,
my decision may have come across as impulsive, but I knew Z would
understand. She had to. “When we were...frozen...” My voice wobbled over
that one word. Frozen. Entrapped. I could still feel my body weighed down
by cement. Clearing my throat, I continued doggedly. Z didn’t laugh as my
stutter became more pronounced - something that always occurred when I felt
a strong emotion.
“When we were frozen,” I repeated, “we were able to see everything. We
watched you come into the garden, but we were helpless to warn you.”
My jaw clenched almost painfully at the memory. I had tried to scream at
her, but the words became lost. All I could do was watch...
“The others, at least, were faced away. They didn’t have to see you...they
didn’t see you get attacked. They didn’t see your body...”
I began to pace as if that could somehow quell the tension reverberating
through me. My fingernails dug into my biceps, and I impatiently scratched
at the skin.
“Kill,” she said softly. Sweetly. It was a tone of voice I imagined she
wouldn’t use with anyone else, only me. At first, I felt a rush of exhilaration
and a strange sense of giddiness. That dissipated just as quickly.
She had to treat me with kid gloves because she thought I was weaker.
Still, I couldn’t resist grabbing the hand she proffered. Immediately, I fell
face first onto the bed, and her small body wrapped around mine. I ended up
with my head beneath her chin, and her hand lightly stroking my arm.
God, I could die in her embrace.
I loved her.
I loved her so damn much that it sometimes hurt to breathe.
It wasn’t a surprise for me, this revelation. Not really. A part of me had
always known it, had known it from the very first time she had protected me.
When I had compared her hair to food.
I twirled a piece of her hair around my finger, smiling gently. Definitely
spaghetti hair.
“So you want to fight?” Z asked, breaking the silence we had grown
accustomed to. I tensed immediately in her arms before willing my body to
relax. She wasn’t like my father. She wouldn’t laugh at me or reprimand me
or talk down to me.
“I want to protect you,” I admitted earnestly.
Snorting, she tapped her finger against my chin, tilting my head up. I lost
myself in her gaze, the heat and love emitting from her. Her pink lips
twitched slightly, but it wasn’t in laughter. It almost seemed to be...approval.
“I can take care of myself,” she said. “But I agree. I think you all should
learn how to fight...but not to take care of me.” This time, her sigh was
resigned. “There’s more to the world than me, Killian. I want you guys to
protect yourselves, to live life to its fullest, you know?”
I was silent for a long moment, but not because I was ignoring her.
Instead, I processed her words.
She seemed to severely underestimate how much she meant to me and my
brothers. The second we had discovered the mate bond between us, she had
become our entire world. I knew for certain that I could never go back to the
shy, timid boy I was before I met her.
“I don’t know who I am without you,” I admitted, and I could feel her
body stiffen beneath mine. I cut her off before she could protest. “I said that
wrong. I’ve changed since I met you. We all have. You make us better -
better versions of ourselves, you could say. Not one of us wants to go back to
the person we were before. Z, you may hate to know this, but you’re our
world now. I didn’t know the mate bond could feel like this...feel this right. I
want to love you. And hold you. And fuck you senseless. And-“
“You want to fuck me senseless?” Z breathed, and I stilled. That was
what she focused on?
And then I realized what I had said, what I had admitted to, and panic
raced down my veins.
Abort mission! Abort!
“Fuck is such a crude term,” I stuttered out.
She propped herself onto an elbow, the gesture knocking me onto my
back. Her golden hair provided a shield between us and the outside world.
“So you don’t want to fuck me?” she asked innocently, batting those
damn eyelashes of hers.
I immediately began to backtrack.
“Of course I want to fuck you! I want to do a lot of things to you. Why
would you think that I don’t want to? And-“ I broke off when I saw the mirth
dancing in her eyes. “You’re teasing me, aren’t you?”
She pinched her thumb and pointer finger together. “Just a bit.”
“Just a bit?” My hands flexed on her sides, tightening before releasing.
“That’s not nice.”
“Haven’t you heard?” She sprawled onto her back, and I crawled over
her. The move found my legs on either side of her thighs and my hands near
her head. “I’m not a nice person.”
Her chest rose and fell, lust coloring her cheeks.
And we almost lost her today. I almost lost her. The mere thought had me
wrapping her spaghetti hair around my finger
once more.
“You scared the shit out of me today, you know that?”
She nodded wordlessly.
“I can’t...” I took a deep breath to rein in my emotions. “I can’t imagine a
world without you in it. I don’t want to live in one like that. Do you
understand?”
Again, she gifted me with a small nod. I wondered if she was paying any
attention to my words. Her gaze flitted from my shoulder blades, to my
stomach, and then back to my eyes.
Suddenly, so suddenly that I gasped in shock, her hands grabbed my ass,
pulling me even closer.
Her neck strained as her pink lips clasped around my nipple. The heady
sensation sent lightning bolts of desire straight to my perpetually hard cock. I
groaned, squeezing my eyelids shut as her tongue swirled around my aching
nub.
“Fuck,” I muttered through clenched teeth. She pulled her mouth away
with a satisfied slurp, and I dared a glance down. Her breathing was heavy,
and her eyes were hooded. So fucking gorgeous.
“You’ve never done this before?” she asked softly. Her hands kneaded
my ass.
“I’ve been saving myself. For you,” I whispered. As an Incubus, I needed
lust to live just like a human needed food and a Vampire needed blood.
However, that didn’t mean I had to partake in sexual activities myself. The
pheromones that permeated the air in most brothels were substantial enough.
Hell, I would sometimes sit in front of my brothers’ rooms and get fed.
And of course, after I met Z, I would touch myself. A lot. But before that?
I hadn’t ever felt the need.
“So you haven’t...done anything?”
“Not with a female,” I replied, my body still thrumming from her touch.
The hands on my ass paused.
“But with a male?” she asked. She didn’t sound disgusted, only curious
and a little turned on. Still, my face flamed in embarrassment when I realized
how my words could be construed.
Chuckling nervously, I said, “No, not with a male either. Well,
technically a male, since I do touch myself a lot.”
Shit, Killian! Stop!
“I meant...um...” My face was an inferno. God damn my mouth.
She chuckled, her hands once more resuming their ministrations on my
ass. I practically mewled like a cat in heat.
“Don’t worry.” She leaned up once more, teeth finding my earlobe. She