by Faye Sonja
“Dochtah,” her father called to her, signalling that she needed to get back to work instead of staring into space. A few stalls down, Cas was busy helping their neighbor and he looked like he was having a ball doing it.
Shops and stalls of all different kinds stood on either side of the street obediently. None of them had doors for the shopkeepers knew very well that the doors would not last long against the might, impatience, and the bustle of the customers that were to flood the weekly market space. Herds of people climbed on top of each other at the counter of each shop yelling wildly like mindless monkeys brawling for a banana. It was a comical scene that she never got tired of, and it was a positive thing. That meant that her family would make the much needed money to by seeds to store for the coming spring when fresh things would be planted.
Large tattered wagons decorated with a collage of vegetable were parked beside the street and their owners stood beside them screaming out prices like auctioneers, but instead of a hammer, they had a carrot which they would use to wade of the flies pointlessly dancing around the vegetables. Sweaty buyers skilfully wove their way by, locating minute gaps between people and squeezing through. Pickpockets were like rabbits in a carrot field, and snatched the wallets out of many of the pockets of innocent buyers too busy bargaining. She could see them but she said nothing more than warn the early customers who came to her stall. She knew she couldn’t cause a fuss in the market. Experienced visitors kept a tight grip on their wallets and purses for the same reason.
“Isn’t this lovely?” Cas ran up to her. It was his first time in the market and she could see he was enjoying every bit of it.
“Yes,” she said pinching his cheek. “Don’t get lost now, and don’t go getting yourself kidnapped. Daed would die of heart failure before he would be able to tell Maem.”
He laughed. “If they ever thought of stealing me, I guarantee they would return me soon after.”
She smiled. “Yes, they would. After seeing how much you actually ate.”
Laughing, they watched a helpless woman fumble through the scores of bags she carried and tried to tick on a list with a pen clenched between her teeth. The sun warmed up the stuffy, humid air which smelled of sweat and freshly picked produce from the fields. The unrepentant morning sun flamed the market, and exhaustion and breathlessness silently approached the first time visitors, but the weekly regulars proudly held on against the torture of the market and continued shopping.
As the day went on, the deafening chaos would make your split as if you were standing under the head of the town’s crier. Vendors yelled prices and frustrated housewives angrily argued with the annoyed shopkeepers. A nincompoop was trying to get his carriage across the market and carelessly shouted to the river of people ahead completely ignoring him. It seemed as if all the sounds in the world had come to a union.
As produce was bought she replaced it from the boxes they had hauled in until the last of it was put on display.
“Not a bad day,” her father said pinching her cheeks as she took a seat beside him to munch on the bread they had brought from home. Her eyes never left the crowd. She was looking for a young man who was paying more attention to her than the norm, but she saw no one.
“Expecting company?” her father asked her when she was clearly too distracted to look at him. She smiled. She could not tell him that she was trying to find a husband from elsewhere. He was expecting her to marry Samuel. She was twenty-six and well past the age where she should be settled.
“Just enjoying the scenery,” she said. “And no, it is certainly not a bad day.”
He pinched her cheeks and left her to go find his wayward son as the market carried on. Older than the people in it was this market, and it was like this every day. With long forgotten secrets lying deeply buried in its roots and vast knowledge in its stem, it kept on living
“Excuse me,” a culture deep voice interrupted her quiet meditation. “Are you Jessica Massey?”
She lost her ability to speak as she looked up into the sad grey eyes that spoke of many tales to be told.
“Ye-Yes,” she finally responded.
“You are beautiful,” was his first response and then shock registered on his face as she blushed. “I am sorry. I meant to say I am Joshua Ashon. It is nice to make your acquaintance.”
She could not believe that such a smashing gentleman was who she was expecting. He stood a whole head taller than her and even as he tipped his hat in salutation to her she knew that something was just right about him.
“It is nice to meet you, too,” she whispered. Then fell silent.
The loud chaos of the afternoon market faded and all she could see was him. All she could focus on was him and nothing more. He looked right and his strong presence spoke to a deeper part of her. She reset her bonnet on her head.
“Joshua!” A tall man made of bronze from his extensive time in the sun hollered at him.
She watched him reluctantly pull his face away from her. “Yes?”
“I need your help here son,” Smith called back.
Joshua turned back to face her and smiled. “I have to go.”
She nodded.
“I will come back before I leave,” he said to her and walked away reluctantly. She watched him go and wanted to beg him to stay. Something about him soothed her.
“He is quite a catch,” her father said to her.
She blushed and turned back to straightening the fruits on the stall that needed no straightening, afraid to open her mouth least her tongue betrayed her secret. She kept quiet and hopeful that he would come back, but as the market died down and the sun bid them farewell he was nowhere to be seen. When they loaded what was left into their buggy and headed home for the evening her heart broke.
Could it have been her blind eye that had turned him away from her?
No, for he had called her beautiful.
She hoped it was work that had kept him away and not something else, but for the next two weeks she would never know what it was for no notes came and with each day her heart wept for the lost connection she had felt so deeply.
* * *
2
Chapter TWO
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“ She hoped he would be something
more than just the same traditional
gentleman she was growing tired of.”
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It was two weeks later when she was back in the same place. She had skipped coming the week before out of fear that Joshua might not show up, or she would see him and he would be wholly disinterested in her. Fear of rejection had crippled her, but her father would not allow her to escape this week. He had no idea what the issue with her was, but it was made very clear that he needed her help, and so here she was again.
Red nosed and sanguine cheeked, the sea of people waited impatiently that day. It seemed they had all come out before the sellers like eager horses waiting to be fed. The swarm of anxious crowd unites in silence as she turns to place the final produce on the stall and waited the next twenty minutes before the market gates would be opened.
“I wrote to you and you did not respond,” she heard a familiar voice behind her and her heart near jumped from her chest. She turned to look into the piercing eyes that had held her soul the week before.
“I got no such correspondence,” she retorted. She had pined for him for two weeks and now that he was here all she felt was anger at being given hope only for her to be let down.
“Are you saying I fibbed?” he asked her in shock.
She turned to look at him. “Did you?”
His eyes narrowed. “I would never do such a thing to a woman like you. That is not our way. I simply got pulled away the last time and I wrote to you in hope you would understand. The week past I stood here hoping you would come, but you didn’t and I have waited with painful patience since then.”
She look
ed into his eyes and somehow could feel he was telling the truth but it still did nothing to ease her annoyance with him. “I got no letter from you.”
“Please, Jessica believe me,” he almost begged, but she could not. He had let her down once before and strangely it had hurt even though she had only known him for a matter of minutes. When it was clear no sympathy and understanding would come from her, he turned and went back the way he had come. She watched him walk away with his shoulders hunched and his britches loose on his hips. She could see his shoulders bore the weight of her rejection and she was happy he now understood what she had been feeling.
Just then, the gates flew open and the overflowing crowds bustled in, everyone eagerly vying and straining to see the latest offerings. As the people slowly scattered into different areas, enormous parties of business men made their way to the greasy spoon, hoping for a quick slab of breakfast. The aroma of pastries and welsh cake emitted from the bakery. It tickled the taste buds of bystanders. As the first customer approached; behind her, a trickle of people began to stream. The indulgences were stacked perfectly from one shelf to another, blanketing the diamond patterned tissues.
Whilst men piled into the bakery, women made their way to butchers, where banners of what was to be had and the cost of each stood out. Then as they bought meats they headed in her direction and the produce was being sold faster that she had time to restock the stall. The entire time she kept looking for him, but he was nowhere in sight.
Panic that she might have actually lost him ran deep and she had to take a moment to breathe. As the market filled towards the middle of the day, the air was muggy. The distant clinks of coins, passed from one hand to another; the clanking of knives and the roar of anticipating customers echoed from one corner to the next.
The cafeteria pulsated with screams and laughter. Infants could be heard crying, teenagers shrieked and howled, absorbed in the sheer suffocating torridness from the midday sun, causing beads of sweat to trickle down people’s heads. The smell of the greasy, fatty ham and sizzling bacon were overpowering.
Finally, as afternoon approached the crowd dimmed from its peak. Old and young alike stretched tiredly, after a mornings worth of shopping laden on their arms and she saw Joshua once again heading towards her. The determination to be heard and understood was something she could see from clear across the busy aisles.
“Hello again,” he approached her unsure of how she would respond to him.
* * *
3
Chapter THREE
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“ She hoped he would be something
more than just the same traditional
gentleman she was growing tired of.”
.
Cas signalled to her from the barn that their parents were on their way back from church and as soon as she heard that she made her great escape. Today was the day the preacher declared a feast and so there was no need for there to be any cooking done at home. Every month they had two feasts; the first was the barbecue where Joshua had met the community and then this one. She was happy, because she could sense a question coming on from her father and she was not sure what he would ask, but she was sure she would not have an answer for it.
“Can I come?” Cas hollered after her.
“Ask Mama when she gets there!” she called back to him and skipped off with him saying he would. She felt like one of the escaped convicts in the books she was always reading.
“Jessica!” came the excited call from Joshua as she walked down the lane to the little cottage where he was staying with Sister Cassandra, the friendly old woman who had taken to him when he had moved there. She could hear nothing coming from the house and now she was intimately aware of why the house was called the quiet cottage. This was probably only the second time in her life that she was ever coming here and she couldn’t quite remember the first.
“Hello,” she said to him. She could see his eyes twinkle in gratification from seeing her and her face flushed in response. She thought that was strange but brushed it off as she noticed for the first time just how beautiful he was. He wasn’t just one of those men you could call handsome. His piercing eyes and sleek, almost feminine jawbones, made him soft yet masculine and beautiful in a manly way.
There it was again. That strange tingling that told her she was attracted to him. She didn’t get that when Samuel walked into any room she was in. She kept thinking that with time that would change but it wasn’t changing at all. Only she shouldn’t be attracted to him and she knew that now that he was closer it would get increasingly harder for her to hide it.
“Thanks for coming,” Cassandra said rushing to the door and breaking up their very awkward moment. “Let me put you right to work peeling these mountains of potatoes.”
She was ushered away with a fleeting smile from Joshua that told her something she wasn’t quite sure of. Casting one last glance back at him she followed Cassandra who was busy speaking to no one in particular about all the work they had to do before the feast could actually begin in a few hours. Behind her, Joshua hung in the background but his presence was an ever recognizable and welcomed one. For the next hour as she worked Jessica would look at him… stealing glances when she assumed he had no idea she was looking at him.
He really was beautiful. The kind of innocent beauty she wasn’t so sure existed anymore
“You like him don’t you?” she heard a familiar yet barely audible whisper in her ears. She jumped out of her skin blushing red to see Cas’s smiling face beside her. She had been so lost in thought she had not even heard him walk in.
“Shhhh!” she shushed him and he smiled. “What are you doing here?”
“Maem said I could come help,” he said with a frown. “I asked just like you told me to and she said it was okay.”
The hint of disappointment in his face at the tone of her voice made her regret how harshly she had just spoken to him, and so she tousled his hair in apology and smiled as he took a seat beside her and began peeling potatoes. How much she loved him, she would never be able to explain.
“He is quite the catch,” he whispered with a smile and Jessica went back to admiring Joshua who was now laboring over the dough he was moulding. It was strange around these parts to see a man handling a woman’s work so well, but here he was doing just that and appealing to her more by doing so. But she had to look at her little brother sideways wondering what he knew about the dating world. But then again she spoke to him about most things, so she was sure he learned some of it from her.
She turned her attention back to Joshua noticing everything about him. The way he furrowed his brows in concentration and wrinkled his nose as the flour teased a sneeze out of him. She noticed how he shifted from one foot to the next as if he was nervous and tapped a foot in time to the rhythm of the task he was doing. She noticed the way his eyelashes flittered coyly as if flirting with the dough that would soon be consumed as pastry. She noticed it all.
And then Joshua lifted his eyes for a moment from the task at hand and glanced her way. Their eyes met in silent conversation and her breath left her in a startled whisper as she recognized something in his eyes. It was not curiosity at the fact that he had just caught her looking at him. It was not aversion nor was it surprise. It was joy and with it came the silent words that said I see you, too.
“He likes you too,” said Cas beside her as he caught the exchange between them. Ever the astute one Jessica knew he would not have missed it. “That’s good.”
“Shhhh,” she told him without taking her eyes from the man who captivated her. It was not a command to get him to be silent, but rather one to ensure that his utterance did not take from her the moment they were sharing.
A few seconds later Joshua smiled and lowered his eyes back to the flour board before him, and Jessica near peeled the skin from her own hand in joy. She didn’t know how she k
new it but then and there she was well aware of the fact that she had just connected with someone on a level that was sure to make her life a little harder, and with that fact came the reminder that she needed to do something about Samuel.
She groaned out loud. “Here we go again.”
Cas looked at her worriedly. “What is the matter?”
“I like him,” she said.
“I know.”
She sighed again. “And he likes me?”
Cas nodded, glancing at Joshua who was again looking at Jessica with a smile. “Yes, he does.”
“I think he noticed,” she nodded a chin towards Samuel standing to the side of the kitchen with a pensive frown on his face. None of them had seen him walk in through the side door.
“Oh,” Cas said, his eyes widening. “I think that might be a problem.”
She groaned again and for the next two hours she kept her mouth closed unless spoken to and her eyes on the tasks she was given. When she was through she avoided all eye contact with Joshua as she made her way back home with Cas by her side. She was worried about the conversation that would soon follow from her Daed, but he simply smiled reassuringly at her as if knowing that her soul was troubled and she simply made her way to her room to get ready for the feast she was sure she had no appetite for. An hour later as her Maem called up the stairs for her she took a deep breath and descended the stairs promising herself to stay as far away from Joshua as she could.
* * *
“Hello Joshua,” people called to him as they walked past the serving table and requested their taste of the meal to be had. But that was not the only thing he did. He stood at the serving table watching Jessica play with the children from the cover of the fading sunlight. He was not sure how to feel about her hasty departure from the house earlier that day, or what to think about the fact that the she seemed intent on avoiding him. A touch of sadness swept through him and he decided to see if maybe what he thought was true. He would wait though, because Samuel had all but attached himself to her hip today as if he figured something was amiss.