Remember When...

by Scarlett Finn

  Ginger was pissed at her brother too, he hadn’t been forthcoming either, but she was angry at herself as well for painting herself into this corner. She had no money to her name. And the DMV wouldn’t give her a driving license when she couldn’t remember passing her test. Ginger couldn’t walk out that door with Cameron, she couldn’t even afford a bus ticket. At least, not yet.

  Owen had said she’d had a job and he’d known about her passport. So he might be able to help her find out if she’d ever squirreled away any money.

  “I’m sorry to hear that,” Doctor Guinness said. “What is the cause of this upset?”

  So many things and as she looked at the doctor, she was too tired to explain it all. “Shane has money, a lot of money. Calvin found out and didn’t tell me then he wrote this crazy settlement into divorce papers I didn’t ask him to solicit.”

  “That is an abuse of trust,” the doctor said, guiding her to sit on the bed. “But if Calvin loves you and wants to marry you, perhaps he is eager to see you make a commitment to him, and that begins with divorcing your husband. You have to prove to him that you are ready to move forward. You said yourself in one of our sessions that he felt threatened by Shane.”

  She had been wishy-washy about divorcing Shane and Calvin wouldn’t want to be made a fool of. Of course, making out with Shane in Owen’s bathroom was kind of making a fool of the man who’d taken care of her for sixteen months.

  “But that… that doesn’t explain the money.”

  “Shane is worth a lot of money,” Guinness said and she huffed.

  “You knew too?”

  “I make it a rule to do some background on all my clients,” he said with a smile and covered her linked fingers with his. “You can’t be too hard on them. Calvin probably thought he was doing a good thing, taking care of an uncomfortable topic to take the pressure away from you dealing with the practicalities while you were rehabilitating. Your injuries may be invisible, but you live with a disability. He probably sees it as his responsibility to take care of you.”

  Just as he had for the last sixteen months, she began to feel sick like she’d overreacted. Pressing her hands to her gut, she recalled the papers. “That doesn’t explain the settlement. It asked for half a billion dollars, doctor. I can’t… I can’t even think about that kind of money without getting dizzy.”

  He laughed and patted her. “He didn’t choose your husband, you did. And from my understanding Mr. Warren is worth much more than that… if Mr. Bishop was only interested in money, he could’ve asked for half of Shane’s whole fortune, especially taking Cameron into account. Half a billion is actually a modest amount.”

  Sheesh, he was right. If all Calvin wanted was money, he could have asked for so much more. Half a billion was like the lowest possible amount he probably could ask for. It wouldn’t make sense to ask a man of Shane’s means for twenty bucks… and Calvin did have medical bills to recoup, he’d paid hers and Cam’s before they were on his insurance. And he’d fed and housed them both, providing everything they needed.

  Growling, she put her feet on the end of the bed and dropped her forehead to her knees. “Shane is the bastard for not telling me the truth,” she murmured, turning to look at the doctor for confirmation.

  The doctor tipped his head and winced. “Well…”

  “What?”

  “We haven’t covered education and occupation yet,” the doctor said. “I haven’t heard him talk about what he does. But I haven’t heard Calvin or Diane talking about their careers either. Murphy hasn’t either. We talk about this being a process, about answering questions and not overloading. And well, I did lay it on quite thick with him in the parking lot on the first day about not going into too much detail about your life together too quickly. It’s important to try and stimulate your own memory, not to simply ask and be told.”

  She’d been told that by other doctors too. “Oh…”

  “So maybe he could have been more forthcoming, but we don’t know anything about bank balances or material possessions… I’m not sure when it would’ve come up… Has he actively gone out of his way to hide his means? Do you think he was trying to subvert a divorce settlement if there was to be one?” The doctor frowned and then spoke as if to himself. “I don’t know what reason he would have to conceal the truth. You share a son. You would have found out eventually. Even if divorce proceedings were done through mediation and courts, there would have been full financial disclosure.”

  Oh great, so she’d overreacted there too. She sighed. “How could I have married a billionaire?” she whispered, believing it unlike herself.

  Doctor Guinness smiled. “I would like to think you married the man and not his money.”

  When she got here she’d been open to learning about who she was and accepted that she didn’t know much. Since spending time with these people she felt like she was getting to know them and was forging relationships. It was those relationships she felt had been betrayed when in truth, she had a false sense of security. Her subconscious knew these people and that made her feel connected to them, but they owed her nothing.

  Doctor Guinness had said this was a process and for some reason, she’s decided to skip the whole damn process to try to rush to the end without giving everything its due focus. Ginger took a deep breath.

  “So, will you stay?” Guinness asked, squeezing her hand.

  Smiling at him, she nodded. “But we have to make some changes.”

  “Ok,” he said, becoming professional. “I am open to suggestions of what will make this easiest for you.”

  “I want to know these people, who they are now, and I want to be able to ask about who I was. I need answers.”

  He nodded, considering her request. “Ok… then I have a suggestion.”

  After her private session with Doctor Guinness, Ginger did feel better, and was ready to give everyone a chance again. Cam woke up, interrupting their session, but they were done anyway and so she prepared her son and took him down stairs to find Calvin and Boyd in the living room.

  “I’m sorry,” she said, and both men sat up. “I overreacted and I shouldn’t have been so hasty.”

  “That’s ok,” Calvin said, glancing at Boyd. “We understand your condition.”

  Maybe her PTSD had been to blame, her mood swings often were extreme. “Will you stay?” she asked them.

  “Yes,” Calvin said. “If the doctor believes it’s for the best.”

  “Thank you,” she said.

  “What about Warren?” Boyd asked, looking toward the back of the house.

  Exhaling, she followed his line of sight. Both Shane and Murphy were on the back porch, though only the tops of their heads could be seen beyond the kitchen window. “I need them to stay too. I need them all to stay. Everyone has to have a private session with Doctor Guinness tonight. Cal, would you… would you mind going first?”

  “Of course not,” he said and stood up, he came over and kissed her and Cam too.

  His smile was weak, but she appreciated it all the same. “He’s in his room.”

  Calvin nodded and looked at his lawyer again before going up the stairs. “You’re doing the right thing,” Boyd said.

  Taking another breath, Ginger shrugged. “I hope so, Boyd. I really do.”

  Heading for the kitchen, she was struggling to contain her wriggly son, but he seemed to calm as soon as she pushed the back screen open. As soon as she stepped outside both Shane and Murphy sat up straight, clearing their tense expressions of annoyance to look at her with contrite hope.

  She didn’t even know where to begin, but Shane, she recognized him again and that was more of a relief than she could express. “Hey, buddy,” Shane said to Cam, but when he lifted a finger to touch him, she twisted the baby away to prevent contact much to Shane and Murphy’s surprise.

  “I’m sorry,” she said, finding this apology harder.

  “You’re… You’re sorry?” Shane asked. “Baby, I’m sorry. You have nothing to apo
logize for.”

  “Doctor Guinness and I had a conversation. He thinks it would be beneficial for everyone to have a private session with him. Calvin has agreed to stay and is talking to the doctor now.” Rolling her eyes upward, she felt more emotional here, and hid her mouth in Cam’s hair for a moment so she could calm herself before she spoke again. “I need to apologize to you both and ask if you are willing to stay and keep working.”

  They shared a look and for a second she thought they were going to say no. Ginger didn’t know what she would do if they did. “We’re here to the bitter end for anything you need, Bit,” Shane said and his polite smile gave her some hope that maybe there was something for them to build on.

  “Owen said you had business to deal with,” she said, kicking herself now for not asking more about all those times the office was referred to. If she thought about it, Shane had always freely offered money. He’d never hidden his means, he paid Cam’s treatment at the hospital, spoke about buying a new car, offered to pay for this stay too. But she couldn’t focus on the clues she’d failed to pick up on, they had to move forward. “I didn’t realize how important it might be. If you have to leave—”

  “Nothing is more important than this,” Shane said.

  She believed him, but had to be honest. “My memories aren’t worth ten billion dollars.”

  “No,” Shane said, leaving his seat. “They’re worth a hundred times that much.”

  She couldn’t look at him or let him touch her, so when he tried to reach for her face, she backed off a step. “Shane,” she said and her voice cracked, so she dug her teeth into her lip.

  “You don’t like to be touched,” he said, his voice so disappointed and resigned that when she raised her eyes to his a tear slid from her lashes.

  “I’m sorry,” she whispered.

  “It’s my fault,” he said, struggling to restrain the annoyance simmering behind his tone, but she didn’t feel like it was aimed at her. “You did nothing wrong… I promised myself I wouldn’t hurt you again and I… I fucked that up, didn’t I?” She didn’t even correct his cursing. His tongue moved on the inside of his lip. “Excuse me.”

  Shane marched off, but didn’t leave their sight. He went down the porch stairs and kept on going until he reached the edge of the grass just before the lake’s perimeter path.

  While watching the back of the stoic man, another tear slid free. This should be a happy day, Cam had official notification of who his father was. Instead, Shane had been threatened with divorce, told he was being used for his money, and kicked out of her life.

  The sadness welled because she had no idea if they would ever get their rapport back. She would have to be more guarded. It wasn’t his fault that she’d leapt in with both feet and got burned. But he would suffer the consequences because she couldn’t let it happen again.

  “There are things you have to know,” Murphy said and she spun around, having almost forgotten that he was there.

  “I know,” she said. “I mean, I know that now.”

  “He never wanted to hurt you.”

  “But I got hurt,” she said. “Even if it was my fault, it happened.”

  “You can’t keep him from his son,” Murphy said. “It’s not fair, they adore each other.”

  She looked down at Cam to see he was staring at his father’s static figure. “I… I wouldn’t, I…”

  “Shane tried to touch Cam and you pulled the little guy away like his father was going to poison him.”

  Oh God, she was fucking up over and over again. She hadn’t even been thinking how that would look. “I had to say my piece, that was all,” she said. “Doctor Guinness said I shouldn’t do anything else until I apologized and asked you all to stay.”

  To console Shane in the way she couldn’t, and to prove she had no intentions of playing games with their relationship, she took Cam onto the grass and put him down. “Go get daddy,” she whispered into the top of his head and kissed him before letting him go.

  Watching him in his racing crawl for a few feet until she was happy he was headed in the right direction, she went back up the stairs to flop onto the seat beside Murphy. “You know how to keep things interesting, Gin… You always did.”

  The grass was only about fifteen feet wide. Cam was three quarters of the way across when he stopped to sit. “Da!” he called out and then went back into his crawl.

  Shane spun around, genuinely surprised by the proximity of the call. As soon as he saw Cam, he crouched and gestured him over. “Come on then, buddy.”

  When his son got to him, Shane swept him up into his arms and held him high above his head, he brought him down for a kiss then tossed him up and caught him before running around with his son stretched above his head.

  Seeing the joy on her child’s face made her smile. If nothing else came of this, she had made the right choice of father for her son. “I’m glad it was positive,” she murmured.

  “I told you. They adore each other,” Murphy said. “None of us thought this was going to be easy.”

  “No,” she said. “But I didn’t think it through. I’ve been passive, letting everything come to me when I…” She wasn’t going to do it any more, she couldn’t put her destiny in other’s hands and then cry when she didn’t have a full picture. Leaving the bench, she went to the porch railing. “Shane?” He turned around. “You got him?”

  “Sure,” he replied.

  “For about an hour?”

  He swept a hand through Cam’s hair. “As long as you need.”

  “Where are you going?” Murphy asked when she began to head inside.

  “To the lodge,” she said. “It’s time I got myself an education.”

  Ginger had been gone for more than an hour, but there was a lot to take in, more than she could ever have imagined. WarNet started as a mapping device for outdoor types. She didn’t really understand how it worked, but it sent out pulses that registered every environment in 3D. It collected the data and uploaded it whenever it came into contact with any Wi-Fi and could be plugged into other devices too.

  There was a whole range of hardware from watches to bulky, mechanical looking things that were used by scientific sorts, with prices ranging from a grand to a hundred grand. Over the years, the devices had grown and included all sorts of extra features. There was also a WarNetwork too which connected all sorts of people who enjoyed outdoor pursuits. They shared the data from their devices on this massive social network allowing for changes and updates to be made all the time. People could communicate, keep in touch, check in with relatives, as well as share photos and status updates.

  Now people could plan their trips and routes, right down to taking into account the latest fallen tree. But it wasn’t just used by survivalists and boy scouts. WarNet had government contracts and were apparently working on some joint venture with NASA and another with the Navy. The device’s range was ever growing and they could be used to communicate, in fact, WarNet offered a whole range of sat phones that were apparently the world’s most reliable.

  As for Shane, his love for the outdoors was what inspired the device and he was an avid mountaineer who’d summited some of the world’s highest peaks, including Everest. He tested all devices himself, making sure they were durable and fit for purpose, taking them to their limits.

  WarNet worked to provide information to ski resorts and other weather reliant services as the devices could also collect data on humidity, air quality, a whole host of things.

  Ginger couldn’t even begin to read up on everything, she’d just started to read about the securities company Shane had acquired five years ago when she noticed the time and had to run from the internet café at the lodge to get back to the chalet.

  Shane had Cam ready for dinner by the time she got back. Everyone else was ready, waiting for her. Holding her printouts under her arm, Ginger went over to kiss her baby and then headed to the stairs.

  “Sorry, guys, I’ll get changed, just give me a minute,” G
inger said, starting upstairs, she turned to look back at the group. “Calvin, can I talk to you?”

  “Of course.” He left Boyd and followed her up to her bedroom. Grabbing a dress from the closet, Ginger stripped out of her jeans and shirt as he closed the door. “Is everything ok?”

  “Yes,” she said, applying moisturizer and deodorant. “How was your session with Doctor Guinness?”

  “Productive,” he said. “He has some good ideas. I like the change to how therapy will work.”

  “Me too,” she said, putting on her dress, she grabbed her brush from the drawer to run it through her hair. “I haven’t seen your mom today, is she ok?” Really she wanted to know how Diane was handling the explosive day.

  “She’s going back to the city,” he said. “Boyd will remain here.”

  He was probably more useful and with the changes in therapy, there would be less need for Diane to be here. “Could I ask you for something?” she asked, spraying perfume.

  “Anything.”

  “I need a computer.”

  He blinked, like he hadn’t expected her to say that and frowned. “Uh, okay… I can arrange to have one delivered. A laptop?”

  “Thank you,” she said. “I’d appreciate that.”

  Going over to him, Ginger took a breath and smiled. “Doctor Guinness said you were going to make a decision,” Calvin said. “That I shouldn’t push about the divorce papers for a few days.”

  She shook her head and wrapped her arms around him. “I know this is complicated and I appreciate you being patient… he suggested that on top of our regular therapy Shane and I should sit with a lawyer, you know, like mediation… I need to talk to him tonight about it.”

  “I would prefer you not talk to him alone.” Nodding, she relaxed when he put his arms around her. “Doctor Guinness said I should be honest about my feelings on your relationship with him, before the fact if I can.”