Ctrl Z

by Danika Stone

  He shook his head, turning again to look at the room.

  “Not really mine either.”

  His words faded as he caught sight of a group of men crossing the floor. It was Luca Brin and his thugs. He waved as he caught sight of Jude and the rest.

  “Marq! Jude!” Luca shouted. “You made it!”

  Jude turned, just as a young woman arrived carrying Kimbra’s coat and a set of keys on a silver tray.

  “I’m out of here,” Kimbra said with a terse smile. “See y’all Monday.”

  Jude waited until she’d stepped away before turning on Marq.

  “You set this up!” Jude snarled.

  Marq rolled his eyes.

  “Luca wanted to talk shop, and I thought we could have a little fun at the same time.” He lifted his drink, looking away from Jude. He and Marq had been drinking buddies since Jude had been hired in the Tech Department. He was a great guy to party with – always up for some fun – but there were times when Jude hated him.

  “You’re an asshole!” Jude hissed, just as Luca reached the table.

  “Jude, my friend!” Luca laughed. “You’re exactly the person I wanted to talk to.”

  Jude swallowed hard, his eyes taking in the sight of the mobster, beaming down at him. His teeth were a little too white, like fangs.

  “Why’s that?” Jude asked warily.

  Luca pushed into the booth next to him, putting his elbows on the table, and penning Jude in.

  “Mr. Fischer is very impressed with your progress so far,” he said. “Told me he might have another project for you.”

  “Look, I don’t think I’ll be able to—”

  “King wants a full report on what you’ve found. Start making a list of details,” Luca continued. “And when you give that, I’ll explain what else King is looking for.”

  “I… I’m not even done with this one,” Jude stammered. “I can’t take on anything else!”

  “Ah, but you must be getting close,” Luca said, waving Jude’s words away.

  “I still need time. I’m trying to get it done, but it’s not an easy thing to do!”

  Luca put a heavy hand on Jude’s shoulder, leaving it there. It was a weight, holding him down. Jude could barely breathe, let alone talk.

  “Get your report ready, Jude,” Luca said darkly. “I’ll be coming to talk to you soon.”

  Jude nodded, and Luca let go, standing to go to the other side of the booth.

  “Marq, my friend! I knew I could count on you to get everyone out tonight!”

  Jude felt the blood drain from his face. This wasn’t just a ‘get together’ for friends, this was Marq following orders. In his mind, the maze grew smaller, his exits disappearing. Nausea rising, Jude staggered to his feet. Halfway to the exit, he saw Abhishek. Jude put his head down and walked faster. Jude needed an escape, but even more than that, he needed to see Indigo.

  She was the only thing in his life that made sense anymore.

  : : : : : : : : : :

  Indigo had been dancing for what felt like hours, alcohol and music, and the hot press of bodies, wrapping her in a haze of motion. She and Shireese moved together, arms half-wrapped around one another. Indigo twirled, her eyes moving to the stage where Tanis sang, her voice a throaty growl. The sound was another layer, buffering her from the world. She should be upset, Indigo knew, but the whiskey had pushed away the fear, leaving numbness instead.

  She liked that.

  Ten years ago, this would have been the time to go into the back room of the club and shoot up with some of the other girls, but Indigo had learned that lesson hard, the first time someone had passed out, and never woken up. Nowadays, alcohol or pot were her drugs of choice. Something strong enough to muffle the pain, but not so strong as to kill her. ‘Don’t need any help with that…’ she thought in dark humour. She twirled around, losing Shireese and bumping into a dark-haired man in a too-tight shirt. He laughed, reaching out, but she shimmied away, eyes on the crowd. She couldn’t see Shireese anymore. Moving in larger circles, Indigo danced, waiting out one song, and then a second, Tanis’ voice growing hoarse as the set continued.

  Finally reaching the edge of the dancers, Indigo paused, panting, her eyes on the exit door. It was propped open with a sand-filled bucket full of cigarette butts. The scent of cannabis wafted forward, and Indigo laughed at her good fortune. ‘Yes,’ she thought happily, ‘tonight is the perfect night for that.’ She wove her way unsteadily to the door, heading outside, surprised to see Shireese and a man near the end of the alley. Backlit by the streetlight, she couldn’t see either of their faces, but Shireese’s voice, raised in anger, echoed forward.

  “And you stay away from her!” she bellowed. “Indigo’s done! Don’t you get that?!”

  Indigo put a hand on the brick wall, staggering forward.

  “Look, Shireese,” the man answered, his voice strangely familiar, “I saw the posters and I figured if you were here, she’d be here and—”

  “You’re not welcome!” Shireese roared. “Do you know what you did to her? Indigo’s strong, but everyone can be broken!”

  The alley was cold, winter air chilling through the sweat on her back. Indigo took shallow breaths, her legs weak and shaking. She stumbled, catching herself on the wall, and the man turned at the sound. In the light, she could see his face. The terror of Luca folded back in on itself, replaced by excitement.

  “Cal?”

  Indigo expected Shireese to say something, but she didn’t. She just walked away, disappearing around the front of the building by the time Indigo made it to Cal’s side.

  “Why are you here?” she asked thickly. Nothing made sense tonight.

  “I had to see you.”

  He held his hands at his side, not touching her. Indigo knew how hard that was for him. She was every bit the drug to him that he was to her, and she liked the feeling of it tonight. Emboldened by the alcohol in her veins, she stepped closer, watching as his eyebrows pulled together as if in pain.

  “Well, you’ve seen me now,” she purred. “So go.”

  He took a sharp breath.

  “I can’t! I thought I could, but then I saw you the other night, and all those feelings were back.”

  Indigo watched him, every word burned into her mind. Drunk, she was in no state to argue. All she knew is that she wanted to forget.

  “I’ve moved on,” she taunted. “You waited too fucking long to figure it out.”

  He reached out, grabbing her upper arm. He wasn’t squeezing hard yet, but he would be. That was Cal too. She hated and loved him for it.

  “It’s that kid, isn’t it?” he sneered.

  “He’s not a kid,” she said coolly. “He’s older than me.”

  Cal’s lips turned down at the edges, and he leaned forward, looming.

  “Might be,” he ground out. “But does he make you feel like I do?”

  His hands on her arm tightened until they hurt. Indigo’s heart was pounding, the rush of fear and lust riding one another.

  “Don’t!” she hissed.

  Cal leaned in and kissed her.

  : : : : : : : : : :

  When Jude arrived at O’Reilly’s the place was standing room only, the music so loud the front windows were vibrating in time to the bass. The band was onstage, surrounded by dancers and drinkers. Jude caught sight of Shireese standing next to one of the large speakers, but she was too far away to shout to, so he moved on, searching the crowd for Indigo. He did two tours of the bar, without success. There were simply too many people to be able to see, everyone jostling for position. Fighting the urge to start shoving, Jude pulled his cell phone from his pocket, walking out the front doors to the street to call her.

  Ears ringing, Jude wandered away from the entrance, hoping to get far enough away he could hear. Nearing the alley, his eyes were drawn to a couple standing up against a wall, wrapped around one another, kissing. The woman’s long leg was hitched around the man’s hip. He had one hand in the woman’s ha
ir, the other under her skirt, exposing a wide swath of skin between boot and hip.

  Jude lurched to a stop as the realization hit him full in the chest.

  “What the fuck! Indigo?!?”

  The man lifted his face, though he didn’t release her. ‘Callum Woodrow,’ Jude’s mind announced. Shock flickered in Woodrow’s eyes, followed by rage.

  “Jude Alden,” he growled.

  Indigo squeaked, pushing against the man’s chest, but he had her pinned against the wall and it appeared he had no intention of letting go. Her leg dropped to the ground and her skirt pulled up higher, revealing the lace edge of her panties.

  “Jude, wait!” she cried. “Wait! I can explain!”

  Jude turned, stumbling away from the alley and out onto the sidewalk, sick with grief.

  He was done. They were done.

  Chapter 11: Caught in the Act

  Officer Brodie started the trace the moment the call began. There were only a handful of hardwired payphones in greater New York City. By the time the kid on the other end began describing the hacking job and gave the names of Marq Lopez and Jude Alden, Brodie had already tracked the call to a single payphone in the industrial area of Jersey City. He thanked the informant for his information, assuring him that an officer would investigate his concerns, and hung up.

  In minutes, Brodie was surfing the internet for the businesses nearby. There was a Mazda dealership half a block away, a UPS store on the other side. His lips curled into a knowing grin as the last business appeared on his screen: an army surplus store by the name of “Now or Never”. A place like that was assured to have at least two separate closed-circuit cameras from which to choose.

  Information noted, Officer Brodie took several minutes to file a second, unrelated report about a bogus mugging downtown, and to delete the phone message from the system. He then turned to the computer history, removing his search, and adding the new, falsified information to the computer’s database. Done, he folded the hand-written report in half, tucking it into his inside pocket before returning to the phone lines.

  He’d be off shift in four hours. Time enough to deal with the informant then.

  : : : : : : : : : :

  Indigo was furious in the aftermath of Jude’s discovery. She pulled away from Cal, her upper arms throbbing where he’d had her pinned against the wall.

  “Let me go!” she shouted.

  Jude was already at the end of the alley, shoulders hunched. She took two stumbling steps forward as Jude disappeared around the edge of the building.

  “Jude!” she screamed. “Jude! WAIT!”

  Cal moved in front of her.

  “I want to get back together, Indigo,” he said calmly. “I’m ready this time. I don’t care about—”

  “It’s too late!” she cried, stepping to the side, only to be blocked again. “Jude,” she called. “Just hold ON!”

  Cal put a hand on her shoulder and she tore away.

  “It’s not going to last with him,” Cal said. “Jude Alden’s a fuck up. Plain and simple. I taught him. I know!”

  “You think everyone’s a fuck up!” she shrieked. “But the truth is, the fuck up is you!”

  Cal laughed away her words.

  “Think about what you want from life, sweetheart!” he scoffed. “Jude won’t be around for the long run. I will.”

  “You’re the only one who ever ran away!” she cried. “You’re the one who ended things, but you don’t get to decide if they start again!” She shoved against his chest, pushing him aside and storming down the alley.

  “You’ll come back when you see what he is!” Cal shouted. “You just wait! He’s a screw up who thinks you’re just an easy lay!”

  Indigo didn’t stop.

  Two hours later, she was no longer drunk. Instead, she was panicked. Jude wasn’t answering his cell phone, and when she called the other number he had given her for the apartment, his roommate answered.

  “Jude doesn’t live here anymore,” he said groggily, then hung up.

  As O’Reilly’s closed, Indigo helped Shireese and Tanis break down the stage, returning the equipment to Tanis’s van. Shireese was in a sulk, ignoring her attempts at conversation. Indigo knew she deserved it, but it left her fuming.

  “I’ve called Jude ten times,” she complained as Tanis and Shireese strapped down the speakers. “Texted him at least twice that many times. He’s not answering.”

  Shireese glared at her.

  “Would you answer if that’s what you walked in on?”

  “It’s not that simple,” Indigo argued.

  “Never is with you,” she retorted, then climbed into the passenger side of the van, slamming the door.

  Tanis gave her an anxious smile.

  “Do you need a ride home or anything?”

  Indigo shook her head. The bars were closing, but she couldn’t go back to the apartment. Not yet. Shireese’s words cut deep, and her fears about Jude were a bitter poultice.

  “I’m fine,” she mumbled. “Gonna walk around a bit.”

  Tanis took a step toward the van, then stopped, glancing back over her shoulder.

  “You got money for a cab?” she asked. “’Cause I can give you a ride somewhere, no problem.”

  “I’m good for cash,” Indigo said with a nod, wrapping her arms around herself. “Thanks though.”

  With no destination in mind, Indigo wandered, letting her anxiety work its way out through action, bits and pieces of years past filling her mind. Every darkened alley contained memories of her teen years, every faceless figure filled with the nightmare she’d spent years trying to escape.

  Shireese had been working on the morning crew at The Vault when Indigo had first met her. Shireese cleaned the club in its empty, morning state, whereas Indigo was one of the evening staff, their roles defining their lives.

  “You ever think about doing somethin’ else?” Shireese had asked her as she washed mirrors in the dressing room. “Just getting out of here, and doing… I dunno. Somethin’ better?”

  “Better’n this money?” Indigo had drawled. “Don’t think so.”

  “You could,” Shireese had insisted. “You’re smart, hon. You could go back to school, if you wanted.”

  “A girl like me’s only got so many options,” Indigo had said with an angry laugh. “This place’s a hell of a lot better than the other places I’ve been.”

  Indigo hadn’t known it then, but she’d been wrong. She just hadn’t met Luca Brin yet.

  Indigo’s phone buzzed and she jerked in surprise, pulling it out of her pocket. Her fingers tightened as she caught sight of Jude’s name on the text message.

  You still up?

  She typed an answer, heart pounding.

  Still awake. Haven’t gotten home yet. Walking. She held her breath as she added the rest. Can we talk?

  Indigo chewed her lip, waiting for his answer.

  Where are you?

  A tremulous smile pulled at her lips, and she stopped on the snowy sidewalk.

  Just passing the park near the bridge. Heading to the subway.

  Jude’s answer was immediate.

  Wait there. I’m coming.

  She felt her chest ease for the first time since she’d looked up and saw Jude watching her and Cal kissing.

  I’m sorry.

  Indigo hit send before she could change her mind, then waited, counting the seconds.

  Jude didn’t answer.

  The lump in her throat returning, Indigo began to pace. She knew there was relative safety in the light of the streetlamps but she still found herself jumping at every noise. She didn’t trust that the night’s misfortunes were over. And Jude might be coming for her, but he was angry.

  She was certain of that.

  Twenty minutes later, she heard the roar of an engine. A red sportscar sped up, skidding to a stop on the icy street. Indigo peered in the window, catching sight of Jude, unsmiling, in the driver’s seat. She pulled open the door and climbed in.
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  “Nice ride,” she said cautiously, taking in the leather interior and chrome detailing. “I didn’t know you had a car.”

  “I don’t,” Jude muttered, pulling away from the curb before she’d even tugged her seatbelt across her hips. “It’s Marq’s. I borrowed it.”

  “Oh.”

  She peeked at him as Jude slammed the car into gear, swerving through the darkened streets, brooding and silent. For a long while, neither spoke. Even the radio was turned off, the only sounds the thud of cracks in the pavement, the hiss of wind, and the random noises of the night-time city.

  “I don’t know how to do this,” Indigo said.

  Jude’s jaw tensed.

  “Start by not kissing other guys,” he retorted. “That’d help.”

  “He’s not just another guy. We were together for almost a year.”

  Jude’s eyes jumped over, loathing twisting his features.

  “He’s twice your age!”

  “I know,” she said, wincing. “But I… I thought I loved him.”

  “Woodrow’s a prof.” She could hear the accusation and disgust in his tone.

  “I know that too.”

  “Were you in his class?”

  “No,” Indigo admitted, “though he was married when we were together. We screwed around, and things got messy… and... and he left me.” She swallowed hard, forcing her voice to stay even. If she could play the role for Cal, she could certainly play it for Jude. “Tonight I was upset, and Cal was there, asking to get back together, and he kissed me, and…” She took another peek at him. Jude was staring straight ahead, face tight, though a muscle in his jaw was jumping. “And I let him.”

  Jude was quiet for a long time, his face expressionless, though the knuckles on his hands were white. In the hours before dawn, the sky was an inky black, the streets barren. When they reached the road leading to Indigo’s apartment, Jude slowed down, pulling into an empty spot near the front doors. He put the car into park, not moving.

  “Are you gonna say something?” Indigo whispered.

  He let out a weary sigh, rubbing his hand over his face. “Thank you for telling me, I guess,” Jude said.