Need

by K. I. Lynn

  Oh, she’s mad. Raging mad. For some reason, I find that to be fucking fantastic, because it means she cares. I always knew Kira cared, but this is different.

  I’m not even making sense in my own head, but I don’t give a shit. This girl has my willpower in shreds. I can’t resist her anymore, so I let her know: “I’m going to kiss you again.”

  She freezes for a heartbeat. Maybe two.

  And I start reaching for her face, ready to devour those pouty lips of hers.

  Kira starts pushing at my chest again, her anger returning full force. “Go find whatever slut you were with last night. I’m sure she’ll be more than happy to give you that kiss.”

  She’s jealous.

  I grab her wrists to stop her struggles, really smiling now. Cheeks hurting, teeth fully showing, shit-eating grin on full display.

  My Kitty is jealous, and I can’t explain why that makes me so fucking ecstatic, but it does.

  Her mouth falls open when she catches my smile. “What the heck is wrong with you, lunatic?”

  I drop her wrists and grab her face. “You.” I lean closer to her, staring right into her eyes. “You’re what’s wrong with me.”

  Surprise flashes in her gold-green eyes. This girl’s so beautiful that it kills me. I know she’s going to get even hotter as she gets older. It makes sense why all the guys talk about her, why they want her.

  None of those dipshits are going to have her. I won’t let it happen. She’s going to be only mine. I’ll make sure of it.

  I stroke her cheeks with my thumbs and lean in to press my nose to her jaw. Her scent gets me high, sets off a low hum inside my veins. “I wasn’t with anyone else last night.”

  “W–what?”

  She’s wearing a thin, gray and white scarf around her neck.

  Fuck.

  Me.

  All the blood in my body rushes straight to my cock. “Let me see it,” I tell her, eyes locked on the scarf, imagining what is beneath.

  “Excuse me?”

  She’s hiding my mark. I’m sure of it. I understand why, but I need to see it.

  My hand is actually shaking when I reach up and grab the thin fabric between my thumb and index finger. Kira goes utterly still, her chest rising and falling rapidly.

  One move, a tiny pull, and the purple evidence I’d left behind is bared to me.

  It’s the sexiest fucking thing I’ve ever seen, with the exception of her expression while we were kissing last night. I love it.

  If I could, I’d strip her down right now and give her another five or six of them.

  Groaning softly, I bend just enough to drop a kiss on the hickey I gave her. She tenses against me and gasps. Melting into her, I place my hands on the wall next to her head, bracing myself, and set in, tonguing her neck over and over.

  Right on my mark.

  I bite it, fighting the urge to go hard, make it deeper, larger.

  Kira fists my T-shirt, but she doesn’t push me away. She seems stuck between pulling me closer or keeping me where I am. A small whimper reaches my ears.

  This is what I’m going to do to every inch of you one day, I think as I swirl my tongue around her skin.

  But not today.

  Not. Today.

  I feel like someone is purposely poisoning me, slowly killing my life force one cell at a time. I told myself I’d wait, but how do I do that when her body is fucking screaming for me?

  I’ll find a way. I’ll find a way. I’ll find a way.

  Damn this shit.

  Somehow, I find the resolve to place a soft kiss on her cheek and move back to look at her.

  Her big eyes are uncertain. They gut me. Make me wonder how I could deny this to myself for so long.

  “I didn’t go off with anyone last night,” I repeat, speaking slow so that my words sink in and she gets what I’m telling her. She still doesn’t seem to believe me. It pisses me off that her eyes doubt me, more than I can properly describe in words.

  Curling my hand around her jaw, I stare into her eyes. “I don’t want anyone but you, Kira.” I want to give her some time to assimilate that, for it to sink into her head.

  But I can’t wait anymore.

  I lean down and press my lips to hers, yelling at myself to take it easy this time. To not go at her like some beast again.

  One feel of her lips, the taste of her gasp against my mouth, and my plan gets shot straight to hell.

  Holy God, this girl drugs me, her scent, her heat, the wet lushness of her mouth. Kira melts into me, her small arms wrapping around my neck, pulling me closer.

  Greedy. Just like last night.

  I fucking love it. Want more.

  I part her lips with my tongue, and my cock swells, jealous. I remind myself to take it easy, but her little mouth is so hungry for me, her tongue finding mine and demanding everything from me.

  Before I can even think of stopping this, we’re fucking each other’s mouths, my hands sliding down her back, cupping her sweet ass and bringing her in close so she feels how damn hard she makes me, how much I want her. Every time she licks at my tongue, it makes me want to fall to my knees in front of her, pull down her pants so I can get her clit into my mouth, slide my fingers in at the same time.

  Can’t think like that.

  Can’t help it.

  Kira groans and presses her small tits into my chest. Runs her hands all over me. Like she’s been dying for it as much as I have. I suck on her upper lip, bite on her lower one, and when she gives me this sexy, needy little moan in return, I make myself a promise right then, right there.

  I can’t have it now, but one day, I’ll have her naked.

  One day, I’ll have her tits in my hands. In my mouth.

  One day, I’m going to claim every inch of her sweet pussy.

  But not today. And, shit, the thought is actually fucking depressing.

  “Kira!” I hear Mrs. Roth calling from the foyer.

  The sound of her mom’s voice makes me fly back away from her. For two heart-pounding seconds, I’m convinced that she’s right outside the pool room, that she caught us going at it.

  Kira is leaning against the wall, her hair a mess, looking so damn tempting that I almost forget I just heard her mother’s voice.

  Then, Mrs. Roth calls out for her again. “Kira! Are you up there? Can you tell Brayden to come down with you? Steven is here, and we’re ready to talk to you kids.”

  What the fuck?

  Kira smoothes down her hair and raises a finger to her kiss-swollen lips, obviously telling me to be quiet.

  I move back toward her and whisper in her ear, “Why is your mom here?”

  She grabs my shoulders, clearly wanting to bring me closer.

  Despite how confused I am, I can’t help but smile.

  “She told me and Ryan that we had to come over. That she and your dad wanted to discuss something with us,” Kira whispers.

  What the hell could they want to talk to us about?

  “Kira! Hurry up!”

  I hear her mother walking back toward the living room.

  Shit. Whatever it is, it’s going to have to be dealt with first before I can sit down and have my conversation with Kira.

  The whole thing is odd. My dad and Kira’s mom have barely ever spent time in the same room together, as far as I know, so why the hell would they call a meeting like this?

  “Ryan’s here?”

  Kira nods up at me, eyes on my lips.

  She wants what I want. I raise my hand and run my thumb over her lower lip, already imagining the next time I’m going to kiss her.

  I want it now, but it has to wait. Fuck them and whatever the hell they want to talk about. The fact that they’re pulling me away from my girl makes me itch to slam my fist into the wall.

  “Okay.” I tilt her head up and give her one last kiss. A small one. It’s all I can afford to give her without losing control again. “Don’t forget that we have to talk after this.”

  No one ever to
ld me that a girl’s smile could be enough to make my year, but the smile that she gives me right then does that and then some.

  “Okay,” she mouths.

  I motion for her to head out before me. When she gives me a questioning look, I simply raise an eyebrow in the direction of my crotch, knowing she’ll see how hard I am.

  Man, the way her eyes drop down and lock on it starts ripping the pieces of my resolve, reminding me that this girl will definitely take it if I decide to give it to her.

  No. Stop.

  I shake my head at her and motion for her to go again.

  But when she turns to go, suddenly I can’t let her, not without one last feel. I grab her hand and caress it one last time before dropping it and letting her leave.

  Kira smiles at me over her shoulder, happiness literally beaming from her, and it’s infectious. My throat feels thick as I smile back at her.

  Watching her leave and not chasing her down now that I’ve made up my mind to have her isn’t easy. I force myself to stay right where I am and think of every cliché in the damn book, anything to try and get my boner to go away.

  It doesn’t.

  Not until I hear Kira gasp out a “What?” from the other room and Ryan ask, “What exactly is going on here?”

  I rush out of the pool room, jumping up the three steps leading out, and storm through the foyer.

  Strange, just strange.

  I look around the living room as I enter, trying to figure out why my dad and Ryan’s mom are sitting together on our couch. Kira’s sitting by the window, chewing on her nails, trying to hide how swollen I made her lips. The scarf is readjusted, once again hiding the hickey.

  I smirk, not wanting to wait to go at her again.

  I don’t register the worried look in her eyes until I hear my Dad clear his throat, pulling me back to the confusion of the living room configuration. “We wanted you kids here for an announcement that concerns us all.”

  My brow scrunches. What the hell is going on? And why the hell is Dad sitting so close to Mrs. Roth?

  The two of them look at each other, sharing secretive smiles, and my stomach drops.

  Oh, God . . .

  “We’re getting married!” Mrs. Roth squeals.

  Time stops and I stare at them. My mind is processing the words, the room silent, but in my head pieces snap together.

  “We’re going to have a small ceremony in two weeks.”

  No.

  No. No. No. No. No!

  They can’t be serious . . . can they? I stare at them, sitting all smiles and holding hands, fucking happy while they rip my world apart, tear me to shreds.

  The final piece clicks into place.

  Motherfucker.

  I knew my dad cheated on my mom, but I never knew who with. It’s painfully obvious now.

  My eyes flash over to Kira, whose mouth is hanging open. Her head snaps in my direction, anguish filling her hazel eyes. The floor disappears beneath my feet. My chest squeezes so tight I have trouble breathing.

  Fuck! I finally kissed her and it was fucking perfection, what was supposed to be the first of many, and they’re taking it away. The one thing—one person—I want and they’re going to make her my stepsister.

  My sister.

  I feel sick. My head spins. The school, our friends, the world, will see us as siblings. She’s going to live in my house, her room across from mine, torturing me even more than she already does.

  Anger takes hold. My fingers clench into tight fists at my side as I shake. I flex my jaw, mashing my teeth together. Their laughter and talk filters into my ears. Joy over some love they kept from us—one that had taken my mom from me and has now sucked any remaining happiness from my life.

  Kira.

  Not my girlfriend—my stepsister.

  “You can’t be fucking serious!” I blow, unable to take anymore of the bullshit ringing in my head. “Married? Where the fuck is that coming from?” I hate him, my father, for what he did to my mom, for being the asshole he is, and for being a liar. In this moment, I hate him for severing my happiness, because I know in my soul Kira is the only one to give it to me.

  “Brayden!” Dad’s eyes harden in warning, but I don’t give a fuck. He’s lucky I haven’t attacked him yet, because I want to.

  “What? I don’t get it, don’t understand what the hell you’re saying.” I stayed with Dad, breaking my mom’s heart, to be with Kira, to stay close to her.

  “You could’ve at least told us you were dating; it might’ve been less of a surprise.” Ryan’s rationality pisses me off. How can he be so damn calm about this? I told him what my dad did. Doesn’t he get it? He sits there, even tempered, looking around the room, taking everything in while I’m going out of my damn mind, willing myself to wake from this fucking nightmare.

  Dad starts answering, but I don’t hear anything coming out of his mouth, because Kira’s folded in on herself, silent, and it’s killing me. I start to walk to her, but stop after a few steps, standing in the middle of the room. I want to take her in my arms, hold her close to me, and run away. Get the fuck out of here and leave everyone behind. Just me and her.

  My muscles are strung tight, and I’m ready to do it, to run, when I catch Ryan’s eyes. They’re empty, contemplating, calculating, mulling it all over. His voice is in my head, asking me question after question. Where would you go? How are you going to get money? You’ll be eighteen soon and they’ll charge you with kidnapping.

  “Brayden Dean Hunt, do you hear a word I’m saying?” My father’s voice breaks me out of my thoughts, and I find everyone, even Kira, is staring at me. A tear slides down her cheek and my fingers twitch, wanting to wipe it away.

  I turn on my dad. “I have a mom, and I don’t want a fucking sister! Couldn’t you think about that before deciding you couldn’t function without a wife? Maybe you shouldn’t have cheated on Mom with her, then.”

  I run out of the room and down the hall, digging my keys out of my pocket just before throwing the front door open and stomping out. I jump into my car and peel out of the driveway. One last look at the house, and I see Kira running down the lawn at me. I pause, letting her catch the car, but I don’t unlock the door. She slams her hands on the window and our eyes lock. We don’t say anything—there’s nothing to say.

  Everything is fucked up. How? How could it turn to shit in less than five minutes?

  My finger ticks at the button that would let her in as my foot taps at the gas. My pain is reflected in her expression.

  All I want is her . . . and I can’t have her.

  Not anymore.

  The car moves forward, my hand moving to the wheel as I turn away from her and her hands that slip from the glass.

  I’m the oldest.

  I have to make the tough decision.

  I have to leave Kira behind.

  I have to figure out a new future. One that doesn’t include her.

  Two days later

  My father died when I was five.

  They caught the cancer late, once it was already in Stage Four, so the end came quickly. So quick, in fact, that it seemed like he was here one day, and gone the next. I was a five-year-old kid, and losing him devastated me.

  Then, it didn’t. Life went on so fast. Mom kept buying me all the Bratz dolls I wanted. Ryan went back to being a typical jerk.

  I graduated kindergarten and went on to the first grade.

  Then came the big move. Mom packed up our lives and moved us one state over because of an amazing job offer she’d been given.

  Ryan had been livid. He’d just finished fourth grade. Leaving all his friends behind and starting over was the last thing he wanted to do. I hadn’t cared. Mommy was my whole world then, and I would have gladly followed her anywhere.

  It was one of the few times in my life I’d seen Ryan that enraged. Ever since we were kids, I’d been the one with the quick anger-fuse. He could be playful, hyper, and straight-up annoying. But the guy had always been a master at
the “Stop, Breathe, and Count to Ten” mantra.

  Not that I don’t understand why he’d been angry back then. What I don’t get is how the hell he isn’t just as enraged now?

  “How can you be so calm about this?” I yelled at him earlier.

  He’d given me this too grown-up, serious stare, his hazel eyes, so much like mine, full of sadness. “Don’t mistake my attitude for a lack of anger, Kira. I’m simply trying to deal with the loss of the woman I’d believed to be my mother.”

  Ryan always spoke like that. Way too damn mature for his age. But what he said to me right then made so much sense that I’d fallen silent, unable to rail at him or keep pushing for more of his anger.

  He walked up to me, hugged me, kissed me on the forehead, and silently walked out of my room.

  I want him to hate Mom as much as I do now, to help me show her how horrible her decision is.

  That’s not how he does things, and I realized right then that he was dealing with his own pain, in his own way.

  We’d both respected her. We both spent our whole lives looking up to her. Finding out that she was the reason Brayden’s parents divorced . . . God, she’d come between them. She’d taken Mr. Hunt from Brayden’s mom, and now she was stepping in and becoming the next Mrs. Hunt?

  I’ve never been this disgusted. Don’t think I’ve ever been this mad. I want to break everything in her damn house, make her feel an ounce of the pain I feel right now.

  She’s lost me. My mother probably thinks I’m throwing a fit, that I’ll eventually get over this. I won’t. Not just because I’ve lost any and all respect I’ve ever had for her, but because she’s stolen something from me that I will never get back. Ever.

  I saw the look in Brayden’s eyes when he wouldn’t even lower the window. Watched his hope die as quickly as mine. He hasn’t even tried to speak to me in the last two days, and I know why. It’s the same reason I haven’t worked up the courage to reach out to him. They’re separating us in the most cruel way possible. We want each other. What the hell do we say to that?

  “Kira!” my mother calls from the other side of the door. “You’ve been hiding in there for two days. I’ve had enough. Come out. We need to talk.”