Arrest (A Disarm Novel)

by June Gray

  “Where does this go?” I asked, walking over and unlocking it. The view, once I opened the door, took my breath away. Directly in front of me was a dock jutting out onto the lake that spread out in all directions for miles. Silhouettes of the mountains framed the horizon, lit only by the pale moonlight. All at once the scene filled me with a sense of peace and wonder.

  “This is beautiful,” I said, sure that my mouth was literally hanging open. I turned around to find Henry standing right behind me, an inscrutable look on his face as he watched me.

  “Would it be cheesy if I said you’re the one that’s beautiful?”

  I smiled, feeling like a tiny moon was lighting me up from the inside. “Yeah, incredibly cheesy,” I said, fitting my body into his arms. “But who doesn’t like cheese?”

  He pressed his lips to my forehead and took a deep, cleansing breath. “It feels good to be here with you,” he said and for the first time in a long time, I felt him start to unwind. “Come on,” he said, pulling me back inside. “The owner filled the fridge per my request. Let’s cook dinner.”

  It was late by the time we finished our dinner of spaghetti and garlic bread. After taking a quick shower in the tiny shower stall (so small, we could barely move let alone do anything fun), we snuggled into the soft bed and fell asleep in each other’s arms.

  —

  “Elsie, come on.” Henry’s voice came from a faraway place, pulling me from a peaceful, dreamless sleep. “Wake up,” he said, his voice closer.

  I opened one eye and found Henry standing over me, naked and gloriously masculine, holding a blanket under one arm. “Good morning,” I said with a sleepy grin, then noticed it was still dark. I checked the time on my phone. “Why are you awake at five a.m.?”

  “I figured we could watch the sun rise over the lake.”

  I rolled over and snuggled deeper into the blanket. “No thanks. It’s probably cold as balls out there.”

  “That’s what the blanket’s for.” He pulled the covers away and lifted me up in his arms in one swift motion, carrying me through the house and out the back door.

  “We’re completely naked!” I hissed, the cool morning air taking my breath away.

  “Do you see anybody else here?” he asked. I looked around at our dark surroundings, realizing that we were alone for miles.

  Without missing a step, he continued down the dock, toward the two Adirondack chairs at the end. He set me down on the ground, waved the blanket open and wrapped it around his shoulders. Then he gathered me in his arms and sat down, pulling me onto his lap. I grabbed the edges of the blanket and closed it around us, creating a cocoon of warm, bare skin.

  I leaned against his chest and sighed as he wrapped his arms around me. “Okay, this idea has its merits.”

  “Did you just say I’m right and you’re wrong?” he asked, his breath ruffling my hair.

  “Not in so many words.” I tangled my fingers with his and held him tighter around me.

  Wordlessly, we watched the sun emerge, both of us struck silent as the navy blue sky lightened to purple and the orange rays of the sun soared up and over the black mountains, bathing everything in a golden glow. The pink and yellow clouds against the cyan sky were reflected in the water, and it was as if Henry and I were alone in the world, nestled in the very center of heaven.

  My heart had never felt more full, more in love with the world, than at that moment.

  I squeezed his hands as my eyes prickled with tears. “I wish we could stay like this forever,” I whispered, afraid to disturb the serenity enveloping us. In the distance, a bird greeted the morning with a trill.

  “I love you,” Henry said, his lips scraping against my ear. I knew right then that he felt it too, this magic that was spinning around, binding us together. “I could spend a hundred lifetimes loving you and it still won’t be enough.”

  A tear escaped and slipped down my cheek. “I wish we could set things straight.” I twisted around in his lap so that I was facing him, my legs hanging off the side. “Go back to being those naïve newlyweds without a care in the world.”

  Henry shook his head. “No, I don’t want go back there,” he said, taking me aback. “I don’t want to be that guy because he’s still in for a hell of a time. I’d rather be this guy right now, holding you in my arms even after all the mistakes I’ve made.”

  “I’ve made mistakes too.”

  His eyes flew across my face. “Then let’s just forgive each other and move on.”

  “Can we?”

  He nodded solemnly. “I don’t want to have anything hanging between us. I want us to start over with a clean slate.”

  I didn’t know if that was possible with our long, complicated history, but I so badly wanted to believe it. I nodded and buried my face in his neck, breathing in his distinct Henry scent. “I want that too. More than anything.”

  For a moment, I wondered what it would be like if we both woke up tomorrow morning without our memories. What would it be like to look at Henry and not know that he’d been an integral part of my life since I was a girl? Would we fall in love again without our history?

  “Let’s do it, Els. From this moment, it’s just you and me,” he said, placing a palm on my stomach, “and this being.”

  I shifted around and straddled him while he held the blanket around my back. I sat on his erection and slid along the length of him as I traced my finger along his angular jaw and down to his chin, pressing my thumb to the indentation there. “I love you so much,” I said as I lifted and held the tip of him to my opening.

  A tremor traveled over his body when I sank onto his length, joining us in the purest sense. He clutched me against his hard chest, running his warm lips along my shoulders, breathing hard. I touched his lips softly with my own, tentative little touches that promised more.

  It was in this moment, as I held him tight in my womb, that I remembered the one true thing about Henry and me: that the love between us was not only emotional but also physical, as if our bodies were magnets inexplicably drawn to each other.

  I held still and enjoyed the sensation of his cock throbbing inside me, warming me from the inside. I continued to squeeze at him and he groaned in appreciation. “That feels so good,” he said in a raspy voice. “I could come with just that.”

  I kissed him, continuing to make love to him without moving my hips. I grabbed the back of his head to deepen the kiss, our tongues gliding together as we breathed as one. We barely moved as we made love, blending in with the serene scene around us.

  I arched my back as Henry dipped his head to pay homage to my breasts with his mouth, wrapping his lips around each puckered nipple at a time. I threw my head back and looked up at the ever-brightening sky. I gasped when his thumb found my clit and began to draw circles, bringing me closer to the brink. Just as I was almost there, he stopped and gripped me to him, our foreheads and noses pressed together.

  “Els . . .”

  And then he flexed inside me, swelling as he started to come, taking me by surprise as he took me over the edge with him. My walls convulsed around him as bolts of pleasure raced through my veins. I gasped when the blanket fell away, exposing my back to the cool morning air, the contrast of hot and cold intensifying the pleasure, making the orgasm go on and on.

  I held his head against my chest and waited until the throbbing subsided, until our racing hearts began to slow. He gathered the edges of the blanket and closed it around us again.

  Henry looked up, the sun’s golden glow illuminating the planes on his face. “God, that was . . .” he breathed.

  I nodded, not needing to hear the end of his sentence, knowing in my heart what he meant to say. I wanted to stay in the moment forever, stuck in this magical little place, where it seemed like nothing could ever change.

  —

  After we ate breakfast, we walked to Main Street,
which was lined with store facades that looked like they came straight out of old Westerns. We ate our ice cream cones and walked along the boardwalk—the sidewalk composed of wooden boards—soaking up the quaint atmosphere that was far removed from the bustle of Denver.

  I stopped in front of a store to take a closer look at the old wooden Indian standing guard. Henry stopped beside me and wrapped an arm around my shoulders. I was enjoying the perfectly innocuous moment when Henry lifted his hand and touched his ice cream cone to my nose.

  I turned to him with a shocked look, vanilla ice cream sticking to the tip of my nose. He grinned down at me, mirth lighting up his features making him look years younger. “I’m sorry, it had to be done,” he said with an exaggerated shrug.

  I grabbed a handful of his shirt and pulled him down. “Come here and give me a kiss,” I said and wiped my nose all over his face, both of us laughing without fetters.

  Afterward we rented a wooden boat and rowed around the lake. It was breathtakingly beautiful, being out on the blue water with the tiny sailboats and other watercraft. Near the center of the lake, we put the oars away and ate our sandwiches, breathing in the clean mountain air around us.

  After several minutes of silently admiring our beautiful surroundings, I caught Henry staring at me. “What?” I asked with a curious smile.

  “Nothing.”

  I gave him a withering look. “Come on. What?” I said. “Wait, let me guess. You were wondering how you got to be so lucky?”

  He snorted. “No. I was wondering how you’d look with a huge pregnant belly.”

  I threw a crumpled napkin at him. “You are so not getting laid later.”

  “What? I was just curious,” he said with a laugh. “For the record, I think you’d look beautiful, glowing.”

  “Uh-huh, sure.”

  Careful not to rock the boat, he sat beside me and gave me a peck on the cheek then wrapped an arm around my shoulders with a sigh. “I may not always be the perfect husband but I can promise you that I will be the best dad I can possibly be to our child. Or children.”

  I touched his cheek, touched by his solemnity. “I know you will.”

  “I’ll probably miss more soccer games and school plays than I can make, but I’ll always try my best to be there for them, to be the kind of dad they’ll be proud to have.”

  I placed a kiss on his lips, swallowing his words in hopes they’d reach his unborn child. “You’ll be wonderful, Henry,” I said. “This child is going to be so lucky to have you.”

  PART FIVE

  DEFEND

  1

  “It feels so good to be home,” Henry groaned as he slid under the covers and snuggled up behind me. “I’ve had the longest day ever. Lots of garbage calls. You have no idea how many people think cops are there for their disposal. One old guy actually had the audacity to call 911 so we could clear out a branch that had fallen over onto his property.”

  I snuggled farther into the bend of his body. “I’m sorry.”

  “I only had time for a burger for lunch today,” he said. “And soggy French fries.”

  My stomach chose that moment to rumble. “That actually sounds kinda good.”

  “It wasn’t,” he murmured sleepily. “Trust me.”

  Suddenly I couldn’t get the idea of hot, fresh fries dipped in a hot fudge sundae out of my head. The saltier the fries, the better. My stomach rumbled again, and even though I’d eaten dinner a few hours earlier, I found myself starving suddenly. “Henry?” I whispered, but received no answer. I listened to his breathing and realized he’d already fallen asleep.

  Not wanting to bother him with this craving, I slipped out from under his arms and got out of bed. I went into the closet to dress but when I came out, Henry was sitting up. “You okay? Where are you going?”

  “Just going to get some drive-through,” I said, slipping on some ballet flats. I gave him a kiss on the forehead. “Go back to sleep.”

  Even with a sleep-rumpled face, he managed to give me an incredulous look. Without a word, he climbed out of bed and started pulling on the jeans he’d discarded on the floor.

  “What are you doing?” I asked. “You don’t have to come with me. Just go to sleep. I’ll be right back.”

  “Elsie. It is my solemn husbandly duty to take care of your cravings.” I was about to make a quip about feminism, when he held up a hand to stop me. “I know you’re perfectly capable of getting it yourself. Just humor me, okay?”

  “Fine,” I said, grabbing his hand. “Let’s go then.”

  —

  Six minutes later, I had a bag of fries and a sundae in my lap, glad I’d let Henry drive instead so I wouldn’t have to wait to eat. On the way back home, he abruptly pulled into the parking lot of a neighborhood park.

  “Come on,” he said after opening my door. He carried the sundae and led me to the swings, sitting down and pulling me onto his lap.

  “What are we doing here?” I asked, popping a fry in my mouth.

  He gazed up at the full moon in the sky. “It’s such a nice night,” he said, holding on to the sundae so that I could dip my fries into it.

  “Don’t you want to go back home to bed?”

  He yawned and then smiled. “I do. But I wanted to have a little midnight adventure with you while we still can.” I offered him a fry and he took it. “That doesn’t taste so bad.”

  “It’s the tamest of my cravings so far,” I said with a laugh. “The other day, I wanted to eat Braum’s rocky road ice cream and Tabasco. I almost asked you to fly to Oklahoma to get it.”

  He chuckled and wrapped his arm around my waist, his palm resting against my rounded stomach. “That would have been a little tough.”

  When the craving was complete, I threw away the rest of the food in a nearby trash can and reclaimed my seat on Henry’s lap. I wrapped an arm around his shoulder as we looked up at the bright moon.

  “It’s almost as beautiful as your painting,” I said, tangling my fingers through his hair.

  His hand slid up my neck and he guided me down to his lips. When he pulled away, he licked his lips. “You’re sweet,” he said. “Literally and figuratively.”

  He leaned his head against my shoulder and we sat there for another several minutes, enjoying the peace that the darkness afforded.

  —

  On Thursday night, I went directly from work to Maria’s Cantina, a Mexican restaurant, to meet Henry for dinner. The first to arrive, I took a seat at the bar and opted to wait there.

  A guy three seats down raised his glass when I received my drink. “Prost!”

  I lifted my ginger ale and smiled. “Salud!” I took a sip and turned back to the entrance to watch for Henry’s arrival.

  “So who are you meeting?”

  I turned back to the guy, who was probably in his forties, with wire-rimmed glasses and a head of wavy reddish-blond hair. He was wearing a thick sweater and slacks, looking like he’d also just come from work. “My husband,” I said, noticing the odd lump at his back. “And you?”

  “Waiting for an ex girlfriend,” he said with a wry curl of the lips. “Trying to get back some of my stuff.”

  “I see,” I said, and felt rather than saw Henry behind me. I twisted my head around in time to receive his kiss on the cheek.

  “Hey, sorry I’m late,” he said, giving my neighbor more than a cursory glance. Henry’s hand pressed into the small of my back when I stood up. “You ready?”

  I turned back to the guy. “Good luck,” I said and walked away.

  As we followed the hostess into the restaurant, Henry waved to a man sitting in the far corner with his wife and kids. “That’s Franklin,” he said to me as he pulled out my seat. “Veteran cop. I don’t really know him. I just know he’s been around the block and helped take down a drug ring last year.”

  “How bad
is it in Denver?” I asked. Yes, it was a naïve question, but when I thought of drug dealers, I thought of places like LA or Miami, not Denver.

  “Not as bad as other cities, but it’s here.”

  I took my glasses off and set them on the colorfully tiled table, glad to be done with them for the day. “Have you ever been involved in a bust?”

  “I haven’t yet,” Henry said softly. “But it’s bound to happen.”

  The conversation flowed smoothly over dinner, Henry seemingly relaxed and talkative. It was a far cry from that man long ago, the one who basically ignored me in order to watch his surroundings like a hawk. The Henry of today had managed to strike the right balance between paying attention to his surroundings as well as his company.

  From the corner of my eye, I noted the redheaded guy sitting at a table with a woman. They didn’t order food but only had drinks on the table as they had a verbal exchange that seemed to get more heated as time progressed.

  “Looks like he’s not having much luck getting his stuff back,” I said, trying not to appear as if I was gawking. In truth, their argument was a little entertaining and had caught the attention of several other diners.

  Henry glanced over and shook his head. “They need to calm down. They’re starting to disrupt the place.”

  I wiped the corners of my mouth with my napkin and stood up. “I need to use the restroom.”

  “The baby can’t be sitting on your bladder already, can it?” he asked with a hint of a smile.

  I pinched his nose as I walked by, feeling so fortunate in that moment. I shot one more look over my shoulder at my beautiful husband before turning the corner to head for the restrooms at the back of the restaurant.

  After using the toilet and washing my hands, I looked at myself in the mirror, wondering if I was already starting to show. I turned to the side and smoothed my top over my stomach, not sure if the soft swell was caused by the baby or my dinner.