Scornful Scones

by Mildred Abbott

  I’d just opened the car door and allowed Watson to jump inside when there was a squeal of delight from somewhere behind me. I turned to find Carl and Anna Hanson hurrying our way. The older couple owned a luxury home-furnishings store directly across from the Cozy Corgi. Each of them held a towering chocolate-dipped ice cream cone.

  “Winifred!” Anna threw her arms around me, pulled me into a quick, squishy embrace before practically shoving me aside so she could lean into my car toward who she considered my better half. “Watson, baby doll. How Mama has missed you. Aren’t you just the—” Her words broke off as she sucked in a breath and then coughed. She practically threw herself backward to extricate herself from the car, waved a hand in front of her face as she attempted to breathe and then began spitting and pulling things off her tongue. She shoved the chocolate-dipped ice cream cone toward her husband. “Carl, get the dog hair off this while I try to clear it out of my mouth.”

  If it had been anybody else, I probably would’ve crawled into a hole out of embarrassment. Only a select few were allowed in my car, and that was only with the strict understanding that they would be covered in dog hair for the following month.

  As I knew she would, once she’d gotten the hair out of her mouth, Anna dove back in, this time not speaking but lavishing vigorous physical affection on Watson. He was a good sport about it. Anna wasn’t his favorite person in the world, but she typically came with a bevy of treats.

  Carl held his nearly foot-tall chocolate-dipped ice cream cone toward me. “Would you hold this please?” Once I took it from him, he went to work removing the traces of corgi from Anna’s ice cream.

  After another minute or two, Anna emerged once more among a fresh cloud of dog hair. She waved her hand in front of her face, paused smartly as the hair drifted away before she dared to suck in another breath and shook her finger at me. “You’ve only had this car a matter of weeks. How in the world could you let it get so bad?”

  I shrugged, unapologetic. “I vacuum it out every week. That’s life with a corgi. You should see under my bed when I forget to use the vacuum attachment after a while. You would think I had a whole battalion of corgis, from the looks of it.”

  Carl handed the cone back to Anna. I doubted he’d had long enough to remove all the hair, but Anna didn’t seem to mind. He dug in his pocket with his newly freed hand, pulled out his cell, and flicked on the light as he aimed it at the car. “I forgot you got a new Mini Cooper. I’m glad you didn’t change; it suits you.” He leaned closer and then looked up in surprise. “But you got the same color? I thought maybe you’d mix it up since the insurance paid for you to get a new one.”

  Katie and I had been run off the road a couple months before. We’d survived, but my other Mini Cooper hadn’t. “You sound nearly as disappointed as Katie did when she saw it for the first time. She was almost angry about it. But it’s not the same color. My original one was a burnt orange. That option isn’t available now. This one is called volcanic orange. It’s a little brighter.” I tapped the top of my new beloved Mini Cooper. “Of course, Katie says it looks like spicy mustard, but I like it.”

  Carl didn’t seem convinced. Neither did Anna. She took a bite of her ice cream cone, then shook her head. “You shouldn’t be so resistant to change, dear. It’s good for the soul.”

  It’d taken me a while, but I’d learned to truly care about Carl and Anna. Plus, they were tied with Percival and Gary for first place as the biggest gossips in town. Maybe their timing was perfect. But Anna was always full of advice, so I decided to cut her off before she launched into a lecture, which somehow I was certain would begin with the color of my Mini Cooper and end up with pressuring me to get engaged to Branson or Leo. “I haven’t seen you two in several days. Any new pictures of that grandson of yours?” I couldn’t remember his name, but he’d been born around the same time as Carla’s son, and I wasn’t above using him as a segue. He lived in Florida, but their daughter sent them daily pictures and videos.

  Without missing a beat, Carl switched the phone from flashlight to photo album, and for the next five minutes—as Watson curled up and went to sleep on the passenger seat—we looked at pictures of Timothy, who they constantly referred to as Tiny Tim. Maybe I hadn’t forgotten his name so much as intentionally blocked it out.

  With much oohing and aahing, from all three of us, Carl finally reached the end with a photo their daughter had sent of Tiny Tim spitting up his dinner from an hour ago. I was glad I’d finished my Blizzard, but Carl and Anna continued their enthusiastic enjoyment of what remained of their ice cream cones.

  “He is a beautiful baby. It’s clear how proud you both are, rightly so.” I left the driver’s side door open so Watson had fresh air, and I leaned against the hood of the car with Carl on one side and Anna on the other. One of the beautiful things about the couple was that they required no subtlety whatsoever. “I’m assuming you heard about what happened at Black Bear Roaster this afternoon?”

  Both of their eyes went wide and grins spread across their faces that assured me I’d just given them a treat a thousand times better than ice cream.

  Anna clutched one hand at the bosom of her gingham dress as she spoke. “Of course we did. The whole town heard. How could they not? We also heard you were there. And that you were also there when Eustace died.” Though she shook her head in what was probably meant to be sympathy, she didn’t bother to try to make it convincing. “I have to say, we were really upset that we missed that one. Well, both of them. All that excitement and there we were just a few doors down not selling a lick of furniture because everyone else was watching the show firsthand.”

  “Anna! Really!” As he sometimes did, Carl took a little longer than his wife to get into the swing of things. I had yet to figure out why he bothered, but at times, he liked to appear above it all. “You’re talking about two people who lost their lives. Perhaps we should show a little more decorum?”

  Anna had finished what was left of her ice cream cone a few moments before, and she reached out and snagged the inch of what remained of Carl’s cone. “Oh, shut up. Eustace and Sally were miserable human beings. Absolutely miserable. We were two of the lucky ones who managed to stay in their good graces, but it was a high-wire at times.” She turned back to me with a knowing look, the lights of the Dairy Queen sign at my back washing her features away in a red glow. “They both liked to be in charge of everything. Granted, Eustace Beaker sort of was in charge of everything, but Sally Apple was in charge of enough, let me tell you. However—” She popped the bottom part of Carl’s cone into her mouth and kept going “—she did like to redecorate her home every few years, so she was good for business. I will miss that.”

  “Oh.” Carl’s shoulders slumped, and he joined me by leaning on the hood of my car. “I didn’t even think about that aspect. She’ll be hard to replace.”

  Anna nodded in agreement but brightened quickly. “Rumor is, you suspect Carla of murdering Eustace. Can’t say I blame her; he was horrible to her just like everyone else. Never good enough for his son. Not for someone with the Beaker name. Of all people, no one in town believed when Jonathan Beaker, who never showed an ounce of spine his entire life, defied his parents and married the White girl. The Whites always were considered a little low-class.” She waved her hand in the air, stopping me as if I’d been about to interrupt. Silly, as I knew better. “Of course we didn’t think that. In fact, Dolana was the sweetest thing you can imagine. Dolana was Carla’s grandmother. I guess technically, she wasn’t a White at all; she married into the family just like Jonathan did. But she was a good one. And there’s nothing wrong with Harold, I suppose. There’s just not much to him.” As if to prove what a rock star in the world of gossip she was, Anna surged ahead, not needing to stop for breath. “But Dolana’s family wasn’t that much higher up on the food chain than the Whites, so that marriage wasn’t quite so shocking. But for Jonathan Beaker…” She tsked. “Well, I know that was before your time, but let me tell y
ou, that was a scandal. Like the prince marrying the little pauper girl. And don’t you think, not even for one second, that Eustace Beaker ever let Carla forget it. Why, if I was her, I would have shoved my too-dry scones down his throat and held his mouth and nose shut years ago.”

  It seemed word about the poison hadn’t spread yet.

  “I would’ve too.” Apparently, Carl had decided to join in on the fun. “Take us, for example. We’re not in love with our son-in-law. He’s a little bit like Harold. There’s just nothing to him really; he’s a bit of a cardboard cutout, truth be told. But our daughter loves him, so that’s enough. We would never treat him as if he was a second-class citizen in our family. Even though he is. But he doesn’t know that.”

  When there was finally a break, I dared to speak. “I heard that rumor myself, that I was suspecting Carla. But I wasn’t, not really.”

  “Oh.” Anna and Carl spoke in unison and had matching expressions of disappointment on their faces. Anna recovered quicker. “Well, with Eustace, you’ll have no shortage of suspects.”

  I did love how they just assumed, by this point, that not only was I looking into things, but that I’d figure them out. “What about Sally Apple? I only met her once, but she seemed rather—” I considered sugarcoating, then remembered who I was talking to. “—malicious. I was disgusted with how she treated that poor barista, Nick. I guess he’s a student of hers, and she absolutely berated him in front of the entire coffee shop.”

  And again, as if they shared one mind, Anna and Carl moved as one, both straightening, eyes widening, as they glanced at each other and nodded.

  “What?” I wasn’t sure what I’d just said.

  “That’s your other suspect. I wondered.” Anna smiled at me in approval. “You’re a quick one.”

  Carl patted me on the shoulder. “Sally’s probably not even cold yet, and you’ve figured out who killed her.”

  Maybe it was brain freeze from the ice cream, but it took me noticeably too long to catch up. “Nick? You think Nick did it?” He was a possibility, but I just couldn’t see it happening. Though Carl and Anna seemed convinced. I had to remind myself that less than a heartbeat ago they’d both been confident it had been Carla.

  “Well, of course he did.” Anna rolled her eyes, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “It’s because of Sally that Nick’s not graduating on time. Not even graduating with his twin.” Her expression saddened, and her tone became a little more genuine. “Those boys have had a rough go of it. They both seem sweet. Odd and a little shy, but that’s how twins can be.” She paused and patted my hand. “Look who I’m talking to. You know that more than anyone. Given your stepsisters and their husbands. But still, it hurt my heart a little bit to know that Nick wouldn’t be able to graduate with Ben. Didn’t seem fair.”

  “Well, I betcha Sally regrets that choice now. Doesn’t she?” Carl joined in on his wife’s solemnity.

  “Good point.” Anna nodded in agreement and folded her hands as if in respect for the dead.

  I just couldn’t see it. Although, they always say it was the quiet ones you have to watch out for. And Nick definitely had opportunity for both. Plus, I could only imagine how Eustace had treated him. Now here was further motive of why he’d want to harm Sally Apple, besides her being a belittling teacher.

  Once more I remembered who I was talking to, and knew I needed to make clear my thoughts on Nick before it was spread around town by noon the following day like it was the gospel truth that Winifred Page had accused the barista of murder. “I suppose he’s a possibility, but I’m not convinced. Like you said, lots of people had reason to hate Eustace Beaker. And it sounds like the same is true for Sally.”

  “Well, that’s very true. Very.” Carl rubbed his bald head. “She had a reputation all over town, and that’s not even including all of the students’ lives she’s made miserable throughout the years. And their families.”

  “You’re right!” Anna reached across me and smacked Carl’s arm. “That brings us to Carla once more. Sally held her back a year too. Maybe revenge is best served cold, and dry.”

  “Maybe.” Suddenly Carl sounded less certain. “But like I said, that list is huge. She was a nightmare to Alice’s son; she’s talked a lot about it in bird club. And think about Odessa. She was on track to be valedictorian until she took Sally’s class. I thought Athena was going to murder her for that. Oh, oh.” He waved both his hands excitedly in the air. “And remember what she did to Declan Diamond his senior year?” His brows knitted suddenly. “Oh, never mind. I guess he’s not a suspect. He’s dead.”

  My heart stopped, and I reached out slowly and touched Carl’s arm, right where Anna had slapped him moments before. “Did you say Athena? Athena Rose?”

  He nodded.

  Anna took over the storytelling. “Odessa is Athena’s granddaughter. A brilliant, gorgeous girl. She’s a star on Broadway now. But Sally Apple took a dislike to her.” Anna leaned in to whisper by my ear, though we were surrounded only by parked cars. “Everyone thought it was because Sally didn’t want a black girl to be valedictorian.” She pulled back slightly and gave me the evil eye before returning to normal volume. “No matter what assignment Odessa did for Sally, she gave her bad marks. Every time. Athena complained to the principal, threatened to sue, but Sally and Eustace go way back. Several of the ones on the town council do. The principal’s hands were tied unless he wanted to be out of a job.”

  And another bombshell. “Sally was on the town council?”

  They both nodded. This time, it was Carl whose eyes brightened with an idea. “Not anymore. I hadn’t even thought of it; there’re two vacant seats. Maybe it’s time for Carl Hanson to be a town leader.”

  “And why not me?” Anna sounded truly offended, and seemed on the verge of smacking Carl again, although this time much less playfully.

  “Hold on.” I put out both of my hands, touching each of them on the arm. “There are two spots. Maybe you two can be a power couple.”

  They seemed to consider and then relaxed. Crisis averted. But the suggestion triggered a wave of speculation and excitement. And for the next twenty minutes, I was privy to all the ways Anna and Carl would change the town if they got into power.

  Occasionally, I glanced over, envying Watson taking his peaceful nap, but most of what they said flitted past. I was too preoccupied with options I hadn’t really considered. Perhaps I’d discounted Athena too quickly. Or, maybe, Anna and Carl weren’t the only ones who thought it was time for a change in town leadership. It was possible Eustace and Sally hadn’t been killed because they were horrible and mean, but simply because they had powerful positions someone else wanted.

  “You think somebody might be making their way through the town council?” Katie didn’t pause in her preparations. We opened in less than half an hour, but I’d come upstairs to fill her in on my conversation with Carl and Anna from the night before.

  “It’s a possibility.” I took a sip of the dirty chai Katie had taken the time to prepare for me and did my best to ignore Watson’s accusatory, yet pleading, stare between me and the pastry case. I wasn’t allowing myself to have any treats either after our late-night ice cream run, and the smell of Katie’s baking was delicious torture.

  “If you’re right—” Katie was interrupted by the buzzing of an alarm. She hurried over, turned off the oven, and pulled out a pan of chocolate croissants before starting over. “If it is about the town council, then that means there’s, what? Three more people on the kill list?”

  “Four. I think there are six members. But maybe it’s another one of the council members who’s doing the murdering. Working their way up, or enacting a vendetta.”

  Katie considered as she popped another tray of pastries into the oven. “I vote for someone outside the town council. Granted, I don’t know them all individually, but what little I’ve heard about them, they sound like they make a lot of people miserable. Unless you’re one of their favorites, they add
a lot of pressure to starting up a business in town.”

  My gut said she was right about that, considering all the things I’d heard from Paulie. “It’s definitely a theory worth considering. The thing I don’t understand is why they would use Carla’s coffee shop as their weapon of choice for the first two murders. Unless they also have some grudge against Carla and they’re either trying to frame her or push her out of business.”

  Katie straightened, cocked an eyebrow, and grinned expectantly.

  “What?”

  “The way you said that, Fred. You managed a straight face. As if you couldn’t imagine why someone would ever possibly hold a grudge against Carla? I’d say she has nearly as many people in town who have a problem with her as her father-in-law did.”

  Well, there was that. “You may be right, but there seems to be a difference between the two of them. Carla just has a temper and is…” How in the world to sum up Carla?

  “Kind of mean?” Katie shrugged as if simply trying to be helpful.

  “Sure. Kind of mean.” She wasn’t wrong. “But it’s a different flavor than Eustace. From what I’m learning about Sally, different from her, too. Both had positions of power and used them to hurt or hold back others. Carla doesn’t do that.”

  “I suppose that’s true.” Katie paused in her task, leaning against the counter as she met my gaze. “You have another thought. I can hear it. You think the town council is a possibility, but it doesn’t feel right to you?”

  I studied her. “I don’t know if it’s comforting or disconcerting that you know me so well.”

  Instead of answering, she went to the pastry case and retrieved a freshly baked pumpkin scone. “I know you’ve been eyeing this too. Quit counting calories and enjoy yourself.” Before she shoved it my way, she broke off the corner and tossed it to Watson. He gave a little hop, caught it, and waddled away happily.