“Just hear me out, okay?” he begged, and I sighed. I supposed I could listen to him. There was a part of me that was getting a thrill out of this.
“Fine. What?”
“I… uhh…” It seemed he wasn’t expecting to get this far. He didn’t appear to have a prepared speech.
“Wonderful, very stirring,” I quipped snidely, making to shut the door.
“Wait, just give me a minute!” He held up a hand in desperation, and I could practically see the gears turning in his head. He was never the brightest boy. “I… I made a mistake, a huge mistake, and I want to make it up to you somehow. I know how important this night was to you, and I still want to give it to you.”
The anger drained out of my face and body, as he spoke. All I felt now was tired. So very tired. I was tired of being angry at him, all the time. And he wasn’t a terrible human, just a stupid, misguided boy who made a mistake. Maybe in another life, I would’ve taken him up on his offer, but it was too late, now.
“It’s too late,” I said quietly, echoing my thoughts. “I don’t think you can fix this with flowers, or chocolates, or stretch limos. There’s really only one thing you can do that will make me happy.”
“What?” he asked, his eyes begging for the answer.
“Leave me alone. Forever.” After I finished speaking, I closed the door in his stunned face. I felt exhausted, and I just didn’t want to deal with him. And I couldn’t believe it, but I actually felt bad for him. Sure he was stupid, stupid for fucking Maddie and even stupider for coming to my door after I told him to leave me alone, but he was persistent. I could give him that much.
But all the same, even if Mr. Hendricks wasn’t in the picture, I knew I would never forgive him for what he did to me. I realized I would never have taken him up on that offer. But I was so tired of being angry all the time.
He didn’t push the issue by knocking, and I trudged back up the stairs.
“Everything all right?” my mom called from the kitchen.
“Yeah, yeah,” I replied. “Don’t worry about it.” I had done enough worrying about this to last a lifetime, and there was no need to bring my mom into it too.
I continued my slog back to my room, and then tumbled back onto the bed. Flicker immediately bounced into my lap and I pet him reflexively. There was something about this cat that brought my stress levels down. I didn’t know how I was going to deal without him. I didn’t know how he was going to deal without me.
I sighed softly, and started the movie back up, blindly groping for the ice cream on the nightstand. I just wanted it to be late enough so I could sink into the blissful void that was sleep. This night wasn’t going at all as I’d expected it would, so many weeks ago.
My phone vibrating loudly jerked me out of my cinema and ice cream induced haze, just a few minutes later. I paused the movie and nervously fumbled my phone into my hand. Could it be? It was a text message. From Mr. Hendricks.
Maddie gone until midnight. Come to me.
A cold shiver ran down my spine. That wasn’t a request, it was an order, and one I would obey. Suddenly feeling reinvigorated, I slipped out of my bed, and into some more decent clothes. I knew that I didn’t have to impress him, but showing up in sweatpants would be a new low for me.
I was ready less than 10 minutes later, but I paused at the door. What would I tell my parents? After a moment’s thought, I had a good lie bubble to the surface of my mind. The perfect lie.
I quickly descended the stairs, and went into the den, where my parents were currently eating dinner and watching something on the TV. “I’m going out to Maddie’s,” I announced. My lie wasn’t a lie at all, which is why it was so perfect.
“Oh, she didn’t go to prom either?” my mom commented.
“No, we both decided to sit this one out. And she just asked me to come over.”
“All right, well, you know curfew. Be back by 11,” my dad said, and their attention turned back to the glowing box.
I turned my back on them, a small smile playing on my lips. I was so proud of myself. For such a stupid little thing, too. The smile faded a bit.
10 minutes after that, I was at Mr. Hendricks’ house, racing up the walk. The steel front door was already open to the cool spring air, but I still knocked on the glass outer door, and waited. Our play started the moment I set foot on his property, as far as I was concerned. He had to let me in.
“Ah, you made it!” he said with a smile as he opened the storm door, inviting me inside.
“Of course I did, sir,” I replied, stepping inside the warm, familiar house. “I want to be with you so much, I couldn’t possibly stay away from you.”
Mr. Hendricks snaked a hand around my wrist, pulling me along the usual path to his bedroom. “I must admit, I don’t have anything planned tonight.”
“I’ll do anything you ask of me.”
“I know, my pet. You are so good, so obedient.” We made our way up the stairs now, and into his bedroom. I looked around at it again, taking it all in. I knew this room so well, I find my way around in it with my eyes shut. I could close my eyes and walk confidently to the twin windows on the far side without hitting a single stick of furniture, or knock over a single bauble. I loved it.
He sat me down on the bed now, and to my surprise, he sat down next to me. Usually he went for the ropes and gags by now. “In fact, you are so obedient, that I just want to make sure you know something.”
I tilted my head ever so slightly and nodded for him to go on. “Yes?”
He chuckled, and slipped his hand on top of my thigh, touching bare skin. Electricity filled my veins. “That word is actually what I want to talk about.” His hand moved downward now, to touch my own. “Who do you think has the power, in this relationship?”
“You do, sir.”
He laughed again, and my body tensed with anxiety and anguish. I felt like I’d said the wrong thing. “On the surface, that’s how it appears, doesn’t it?”
“Well… yes. Yes, sir.”
“But you know you have the power to stop me, right?”
I nodded mutely.
“So, isn’t it you who holds the ultimate power? I get to think of all these amazing, wonderful things to do to you, but ultimately it’s your ‘yes’ that allows me to do them. Do you understand?”
“Yes, sir.” I wasn’t quite sure about why he was choosing to tell this to me, though.
He petted my hand softly now. “I just want you to know that you are safe with me. I won’t push you any farther than you want to be pushed.”
Comprehension dawned on my face, as I realized what he was getting at. And I understood completely. He didn’t even need to tell me. I felt totally secure around my master, because the few times I’d used my safe word in the past, he’d stopped immediately. Subconsciously, I knew I had complete control, and that’s what thrilled me so much. I had the ability to control this man, by giving up my control. It was a little confusing at times. “I see, sir,” I said after I realized I’d been sitting there in silence for a few moments too long.
“Good. I don’t want to make any mistakes with you.”
I nearly laughed at that. I was so concerned about myself making mistakes that I didn’t even realize he would have the same issues. “Have you ever made a mistake before?” I asked tentatively. I knew I was prying a little into his private life, and he didn’t like it when I did that, but curiosity got the best of me in that moment.
“Everyone makes mistakes,” he said quietly, stroking my hand with a rough thumb. “Especially when you’re in the military. Especially when your superior is less than stellar.”
Confused by his cryptic remark, I didn’t know what to say. Mr. Hendricks’ eyes were glazed over. It seemed like he was a thousand miles away, at the moment.
As quickly as he entered the trance, he snapped out of it. “I’m sorry,” he said abruptly. “Got caught up in some old memories. Everyone makes mistakes.”
“What did you do in the
military? You were a Marine, right?” Maddie occasionally talked about her father, usually complaining about his military-standard strictness. I wanted to take advantage of his vulnerability, to learn more about it. I so wanted to know more about this man who was my lover, my master, but he kept himself closed off to me. under the guise of our dom-sub relationship. But I felt like there was something much more underneath the surface.
“Yeah. I was a Scout Sniper.”
“Oh. Did you kill people?”
He snorted, and I realized the stupidity of my question. “It’s hard to be a sniper that doesn’t slaughter people. One shot, one kill.” The way he said that second part made me think it was some kind of mantra. He patted my hand. “But that’s enough about me. What about you?”
His random question startled me. “What, sir?” I asked, reverting to my subservient role.
“I was curious at to why you aren’t at prom. You don’t seem the type to miss it.”
“Oh.” I blushed deeply, as I realized Mr. Hendricks didn’t know the circumstances of my entire ordeal. And then my blood ran cold in my veins, as I realized he didn’t know my original intentions for approaching him. “I… I was going to go.” I thought about lying to him, but I just couldn’t do it. “My boyfriend and I broke up a few weeks ago.”
Mr. Hendricks’ eyes narrowed. “You had a boyfriend?”
“Oh, yes! We broke up before I started, um, seeing you, sir.”
“I see.” He squeezed my hand, and then stood up. “I was surprised to see that Maddie was going to prom, tonight. She told me she wasn’t going last week.”
“What?” I gulped. Who could she have found?
“It was rather interesting to see that boy show up on my doorstep, but I was glad of it.”
Wait… a boy just showed up on her doorstep? This song and dance was sounding rather familiar. “Did you catch his name?” I asked, almost not wanting to know the answer.
Mr. Hendricks laughed. “I gave him the third degree, I know more about him than his own parents, now. His name is Joey.”
My blood was running cold already, and now it froze. As I gaped up at Mr. Hendricks, he looked down at me, concerned. “Is something the matter?”
I took a deep breath, trying to center myself. “Joey’s my ex-boyfriend,” I said in a quavering voice, my hands shaking.
“Ah. I see.” He sat back on the bed again, wrapping his arm around my shoulder in a fatherly fashion. “And you were supposed to go to prom with him?”
“Yeah. He showed up at my door first.” Now, more than just my voice and hands were shaking. My entire body shook as it tried to hold back a new wave of emotions. Mr. Hendricks could feel it, and he squeezed me close to him.
“This is one thing I do not miss about high school.” He sighed heavily, and wrapped his other arm around me, drawing me close into a tight hug. “Do you want to talk about it?”
“I don’t know,” I whispered. I could already feel tears leaking out of my eyes, and I didn’t want him to see me like this. I felt so young, so stupid, so inexperienced next to him.
“Well, you know I’m right here, if you want to say anything. And I think it would be best to forgo the session, tonight.” He leaned downwards, kissing me on my forehead.
I nodded numbly at that. As much as I wanted to be with him, I knew I wasn’t up for it. Not tonight. As Mr. Hendricks held me in his arms, my mind whirled in a commotion of confused thoughts. Should I tell him? I so badly wanted someone to talk to about this, but I didn’t know if he wanted a more intimate relationship.
In the end though, I just couldn’t hold back. “I caught them having sex,” I said, nearly inaudible. Mr. Hendricks stopped his rocking.
“What?”
“I caught them having sex.” With a start, I realized what I’d just done. Maddie was his daughter, after all. I could feel my body tense up with nervousness. What would he do to me, for revealing that?
He didn’t move for a long time, but then he untangled himself from my body and abruptly stood up again. “I need to go for a bit. You stay right there.” As he spoke, he pointed a finger at me, commanding me. I nodded, scarcely able to breath, much less move.
As he walked out the door, shutting it after him, I wondered exactly what he was going to do. Had I just condemned Joey to death, or worse? I just didn’t know.
Chapter 14
It felt like eons before Mr. Hendricks returned, but he finally did. I spent his entire absence fretting on his bed, occasionally looking out the window at his driveway. As far as I could tell he hadn’t left, so Joey was safe.
I don’t know why I cared about that.
I should have been fuming. After all, Maddie had broken one of her promises to me, and so publicly, too. She had to realize that I would know what she’d done, come Monday. She had to realize that this would be the final straw the broke the camel’s back, as far as our friendship was concerned.
I didn’t feel anger though, only fear. Fear of what Mr. Hendricks would find out about me. Would he be able to figure out why I’d originally approached him? That I’d planned on using him? I had a feeling he wouldn’t much like that.
And even though that had been my original intention, it was the farthest thing from my mind, now. I knew it was wrong to have done what I tried to do, but it had brought the two of us together in the strangest, most beautiful relationship I’d ever experienced. Not that I’d experienced many in my young life, but still. I knew what we had was special, and I didn’t want to lose it.
So it was with terrified eyes that I looked up at him, as he walked through the bedroom door. “What is it, Krystal?” he asked me. He could tell something was wrong.
“What did you do, sir?”
“Just made a little call. Nothing for you to worry yourself about.”
“You’re not going to do anything to Joey, are you?” I don’t know why, but I suddenly found myself caring about his fate. I didn’t want to be responsible for his death, or anything.
Mr. Hendricks laughed at that. “Hardly. He’s not worth the time of day. I just wanted to make sure Maddie was safe.” He sat back on the bed, cupping my hands in his. “It would be awfully hypocritical of me to try to control my own daughter, after what I’ve done to one of her friends.” I blushed deeply at that, but my master kept a straight face. He was utterly serious, I could tell.
“I…” my heart caught in my throat. I had to tell him, but I was scared. I was so scared of losing him, because my original intention had been to use him.
“What is it?” His eyes glittered at me darkly. “Tell me.” It was a command. I had to obey.
“I originally approached you because of Joey,” I said quietly, my voice barely audible.
“Elucidate.”
I didn’t really know what that word meant, but I assumed he wanted me to continue. “I… I wanted to get revenge on Maddie.” The words tumbled out of my mouth before I could stop them.
Mr. Hendrick stiffened, but then relaxed. He laughed, but oddly enough, it didn’t make me feel better. I only felt worse. More scared, more anxious. Was he laughing at me?
“You thought to use me, didn’t you.”
“No, sir!”
“Don’t lie, Krystal.”
I shuddered. He knew me so well. “At first, I did. But please, sir, believe me. I couldn’t do it after the first 5 minutes with you. I just couldn’t think of you that way.”
“Hmm.” Mr. Hendricks shifted on the bed, then stood up. “I have some things I need to think about. It would be best for you to go now.”
“But sir-”
“Now,” he repeated himself, glaring down at me. Against my will, I felt my lower lip begin to quiver. I couldn’t lose him. I just couldn’t.
But I had to obey him. I silently stood, and exited his room. And then his house.
I managed to hold myself together until I reached my car, and then I broke down. In the back of my mind, I had a sense of déjà vu. This same scenario had happened not
too many weeks ago with Joey, and now I was experiencing the same feelings again. It was worse this time, because what I had with Mr. Hendricks was so much more, and it was me who’d screwed everything up. I was to blame here.
There was nothing I could do but go home, though. It was only 9 at night, and my parents would wonder why I was home so early.
Let them wonder. I started the car.
*****
The next week was horrible. Mr. Hendricks didn’t contact me at all, and I knew better than to try to contact him. I did send him one text message though, on Sunday morning, apologizing for everything I’d done, and anything else I could think of.
My parents could tell I was upset, but they assumed it was about Joey, still. I led them on about that. There was no way I could tell them about Mr. Hendricks. There was just no way.
I ended up spending the rest of the weekend looking at schools, and then preparing my acceptance to one of the colleges in my state. I resolved to send it by the end of the week, if I hadn’t heard from my master by then.
I wondered if I should even think of him that way anymore.
Monday was terrible. When I arrived at school, everyone was bustling and buzzing about prom night. As I walked by the throngs of students, I swore I could hear people giggling, whispering about me. There goes the girl who lost her boyfriend to her best friend. I was a loser. An outcast. I felt kicked out of my own social circle, and it was all because of Maddie.
Maddie.
I narrowed my eyes as I pushed through the crowds, making it to my first class. If she had the nerve to show up at my table during lunch, I would tear her a new one.
Unbelievably, she did. Ash, Sophie, and Jess were already at their customary places, and Maddie was with them. They were all gabbing about what had happened that Saturday night, I was certain.
“You!” I pointed my finger at Maddie in an accusatory manner as I approached the table. “Get out of here. Now.”
“What?” Maddie replied, giving me an innocent, confused look. Jess was already smirking. She knew what was up.
Her Father, My Master: Mentor Page 9