Cowboy Unwrapped

by Vicki Lewis Thompson

  His gaze sharpened. “You would?”

  “Sure. She was always nice to Sapphire and me. Once I moved out of the neighborhood I didn’t make the effort to see her very often. Now I wish I had.”

  “Having you come along would be great.”

  “Obviously it’s not possible, but if I could clone myself, I’d hang around and watch her reaction. She’ll get such a kick out of you, Jake.”

  “I already get a kick out of her.”

  “That’s why you’ll be so good for the community. You’re focused on helping others and we need people like that.”

  “Hmm.”

  “What?”

  “Nothing. I just noticed that you...never mind.” He took a deep breath. “Do you want the rest of that cookie?”

  “You can have it.” She handed it to him. “The eggnog filled me up. They’re big cookies. I was thinking of offering them to my students. I scheduled a couple of lessons for the twenty-seventh because they’ll be bored with vacation by then, anyway. But one of those and they’d be on a sugar high. I’ll have to come up with something else because I like giving them a little treat after the lesson.”

  “You won’t have to worry about it much longer, though.”

  “That’s true.” She sighed. “I’m not sure what to do about those kids. Nobody else in town is offering private voice lessons and I hate to see them quit. You should hear those cuties sing, Jake. They’re amazing!”

  “Wish I could.”

  “They’re all coming along so well, too, but there’s no one to take over after I leave. Well, there’s one person but he’s not good with the little ones. He yells. They’d be better off with no one than him. The elementary school music teacher has her own children and really doesn’t have the time.”

  Jake drained the last of his eggnog and set the glass aside. “But that’s really not your concern. You can’t let those kids keep you from going to LA.”

  “I won’t. I’m just worried about them.”

  He gazed at her for quite a while. “I can see that.”

  “Something’s bothering you.”

  “Let me ask you a question. After you graduated with your music degree, after you’d heard that advice about burning the boats, why didn’t you pack up and move to LA?”

  Her chest tightened. “Because I wasn’t ready.”

  “Then why didn’t you go last summer?”

  “You know why.” She began to shake. “I’d figured out how to live on what I was able to make and every time I performed somewhere, there was a chance someone would be in the audience who could make it happen for me.”

  “But you’ve decided to abandon that strategy. You’re ready to burn the boats. Why now?”

  “Because I’ve been procrastinating! I realized that after talking to Chelsea. Professor Edenbury was right. I have to risk everything and just go!”

  “Why?”

  “Haven’t you been listening? I have the talent and I’m wasting it!”

  “I don’t see it that way.” He reached for her.

  She wiggled away. “Don’t. Don’t try to hold me and soothe me like you would an agitated horse. I’m getting a picture here and it’s not a pretty one. I thought you were on my side, but you’re not, are you?”

  “I am! I want the best for you, but is your plan to charge off to LA what’s best? You love it here. You have family, friends, students and a recording studio. What’s wrong with building a career out of that?”

  “What’s wrong? I have the ability to be so much more.”

  “Yes, you do. But will achieving that give you more satisfaction, more happiness? After watching and listening for two days, I doubt it. What if you forget about what some professor put in your head and think about what you want? If it’s fame and all that goes with it, then fine. But if you really wanted that, it’s likely you would have been on the bus for LA the minute you graduated.”

  “Not necessarily!” Rage coursed through her. “How dare you say such a thing? You don’t know a damn thing about this, Jake. So butt out, okay?” She scrambled to her feet and hurried over to the sofa to grab her coat. It was the fastest way she could think of to hide. She hadn’t felt naked before, but she sure as hell did now.

  He sighed and hung his head. “Damn me for a fool. I kept telling myself not to say anything, to enjoy the sex and keep my mouth shut.” When he looked up at her, his eyes were filled with misery. “But I love you, and I think somebody should tell you the truth. You’re not wasted here. You’re in your element. You can perform, and teach, and hang out with your family. What could be better?”

  She hugged her coat around her. “You know the worst part of this? I can’t even accuse you of saying this for your benefit because that’s not who you are. You’re saying this for my benefit. You’re trying to clip my wings for my own good.”

  “I’m not trying to clip your wings, damn it!” Getting to his feet, he began pulling on his clothes. “There are different ways to soar, Amethyst. You don’t have to top the charts to have liftoff, to affect people’s lives in positive ways. You’re doing it now and you love every minute of it.”

  “You think I can’t make it.”

  “Oh, no, I think you can.” He paused to gaze at her. “And that would be the real tragedy.”

  She swallowed. “Let yourself out. I’m going up to my studio.”

  “Amethyst...”

  “It’s over, Jake. It would have been eventually, so maybe this is better. Goodbye.” She ran up the stairs and adrenaline gave her the necessary boost to make it to the top without stopping for breath. The memory of Jake throwing her over his shoulder hurt like hell, but she’d get past it. Besides, she wouldn’t be in this house much longer anyway.

  * * *

  JAKE STARED AFTER her and debated going up there. Then he heard a lock click and knew he’d have to break down her studio door, and that wouldn’t help matters. He’d caused the explosion he’d been trying so hard to avoid, but her comments about her students had been the final straw.

  As he’d listened to her rave about those kids, he’d realized that if everybody danced around the issue of her leaving, she was liable to do it. She’d hurt herself, her family and those children she was mentoring. She’d also hurt him, but he’d been willing to take the blows. He wasn’t willing to stand silently by and let her do this to herself and others. So he’d said what was in his heart.

  Chelsea had predicted she wouldn’t like it and she definitely hadn’t. She’d ordered him out of her house and locked herself in her studio so there was no recourse. She’d soundproofed the walls, but the vibration of a heavy bass made the whole house shiver.

  After he finished dressing, he folded all the bedding and laid it on the sofa. Then he rinsed the glasses in the kitchen sink and closed up the bag of cookies. At least he had a place to go. In the old days he would have had to break into a vacant house to find a safe place to sleep. But a key to one of the ranch’s log cabins lay in his pocket.

  So did several condoms. He grimaced. Wouldn’t be using those anytime soon. Before he left he turned off the Christmas tree lights. Even though they were LEDs, he didn’t like the idea of leaving them on when nobody was downstairs.

  Although he couldn’t lock the dead bolt on his way out, he could at least engage the one on the knob. He was out the door before he fully realized how hard it was snowing. He had to fight his way to the truck and wrench the door open. His windshield wipers struggled with the snow piled on them, but they finally cleared a small space that would allow him to drive away from there.

  The trip back to the ranch took forever, which gave him way too much time to think. He kept his cell phone on the seat in case he got stuck and had to call someone. The plows hadn’t come out yet and likely wouldn’t until morning. Sensible people wouldn’t be out on th
e road at this hour on Christmas night, or rather, the morning of the twenty-sixth.

  Christmas was officially over and he’d ended his and Amethyst’s holiday with a bang. But when he considered what he’d said to her, he didn’t regret a word of it. He deeply regretted that those words had driven a wedge between them, but he’d heard somewhere that it was a tradition to kill the messenger. Come to think of it, he did feel sort of dead inside.

  But at the very least, he might have given her something to think about. She was furious now, but when her anger faded, she might remember some of the things he’d said. She might even wonder if any of those ideas held water.

  Or maybe that was too much to hope for. He’d have to accept the fact that he could have ruined everything between them and destroyed any happy memories she had of their time together, all for nothing. She could go to LA, after all, cursing his name the whole way.

  If she did make the move, he wouldn’t hear from her, but he had ways to find out what had happened. He could go through Grady because Sapphire would be dialed in to Amethyst’s progress. He wondered if someday he’d turn on the TV and see her, or he’d be listening to the radio and one of her songs would come on.

  If so, he prayed she’d be happy with the choices she’d made. He couldn’t see how she would be, but she might prove him wrong. She might never forgive him for what he’d said tonight. He’d live with that, just as he’d live with the knowledge that he’d never stop loving her.

  18

  JAKE WAS UP early the next morning after getting very little sleep in a narrow bunk bed. As a teenager he hadn’t minded them. They’d been a hell of a lot better than the makeshift beds he’d created in his hidey-holes. But he’d grown considerably larger since then and he didn’t fit anymore.

  The bunk hadn’t been the main problem but it gave him something to blame for his lack of sleep besides worry over Amethyst. She’d been really upset. Although he was glad he’d said his piece, he hated to think of her in pain, especially when he couldn’t do anything about it.

  Peering out the cabin window, he saw that the snow had stopped. He had just enough light to do some shoveling before getting cleaned up for breakfast, and shoveling was great for clearing the mind. He used to do a lot of it when he’d lived here—either snow or manure. There had always been plenty of both.

  In winter each cabin had been supplied with a snow shovel and apparently the tradition had continued because he found one leaning in the corner. After bundling up, he grabbed the shovel and headed out. Nothing marred the blanket of snow, so he must be the first person out this morning.

  Pushing his way through knee-deep drifts, he trudged up to the ranch house and started there. A path from the house to the barn was the first priority. By the time he finished he could smell wood smoke, which meant Rosie had lit a fire and Herb would be coming down to the barn soon. Jake felt good about making that an easier trip for him.

  Next he returned to his cabin and cleared the way to the bathhouse. He added a side path for Finn and Chelsea. The lack of footprints on their snow-covered stoop indicated they hadn’t ventured out yet.

  When the cabins had been built, a communal bathhouse had been the cheapest solution. Braving the cold walk on winter mornings had become a source of pride for the foster brothers and now for the teenagers enrolled at Thunder Mountain Academy. Chelsea hadn’t been part of either tradition and yet she seemed fine with it.

  The exercise had warmed Jake up enough that his trip to the bathhouse to shower and shave wasn’t bad at all. He made it up to the house in time to help Rosie cook breakfast.

  His foster mom looked a little surprised to see him but then she handed him a carton of eggs, a bowl and a whisk. “I love having company when I cook.” She gave him a bright smile.

  He set to work cracking the eggs into a bowl. “I know I told you I wouldn’t be around for breakfast.”

  “Things change.” Rosie started the bacon.

  “If Amethyst moves to LA, I doubt she’ll be keeping me informed about how it’s going, but if you hear anything, would you let me know?”

  “Of course.” She glanced his way. “Maybe you’d better add another dozen eggs to that bowl. I just remembered that Cade and Lexi are coming for breakfast.”

  Jake went to the refrigerator and took out another carton. “Has Lexi finally moved in with Cade?”

  “Yes.” Rosie sounded very happy about that. “She promised me they wouldn’t eat all their meals with us, but I don’t care if they do. It’s fun having them.”

  “Yeah, but from what I heard, she wants Cade to be more domestic, take on his share of the cooking and such.” He added more eggs to the bowl. “I saw the cabin Damon and Phil built for him. Great kitchen.”

  “I know, and they’ll have some of their meals there, I’m sure. Maybe they’ll even invite Herb and me up for dinner, which would be fun. But I’m used to feeding a crowd, so it feels normal to have a full table.”

  “Then I’ll be sure and invite myself over once I move back.”

  Rosie spun away from the stove. “You’re moving back?”

  “I didn’t tell you?”

  “No, you did not!”

  The excitement in her eyes made him smile. “Nothing’s for sure, so don’t get too excited, but I plan to if I can get on with the fire department. I’m going over there on my way out of town to see what’s up.”

  Rosie put down her spatula and came over to hug him. “That’s wonderful news, Jake.”

  He hugged her back. “Like I said, don’t get your hopes up yet. They may not have an opening. But this time I have years of experience to offer, so that should help my cause.”

  “I have a good feeling about this.” She stepped back to gaze at him. “I’ve missed you.”

  The love in her eyes brought a lump to his throat. “I’ve missed you, too, Mom.”

  “Hey, there, Jake!” Herb walked into the kitchen. “I didn’t think you’d be joining us this morning.”

  “He’s moving back to Sheridan!” Rosie turned to her husband. “Isn’t that great?”

  “You bet!” He came over to give Jake a hug, too. “Does this have anything to do with—”

  “No, it doesn’t,” Rosie said. “This is all about Jake missing us and wanting to come home.” The note of finality in her voice was a clear signal that the subject of Amethyst was closed.

  The knot of tension in Jake’s chest loosened. He might never have Amethyst in his life, but he’d have his foster parents and his foster brothers. That made him one lucky guy.

  * * *

  RANGELAND ROASTERS HAD windows all along the street side of the shop, so Amethyst could see her mother sitting at one of the tables, waiting for her. Her mom smiled and waved. Amethyst’s eyes filled with unexpected tears and she dug in her purse for a tissue.

  She’d been doing a lot of crying lately and over silly things, like the way her little five-year-old student mispronounced a word in a song and ended up in a fit of giggles. Yesterday she’d been fixing breakfast and sunlight had come through the kitchen window and caught the crystal she’d hung there a couple of years ago. That dancing rainbow had made her cry, too.

  Now she was all choked up because her mother had smiled and waved through the coffee shop window. She’d like to blame her emotional state on Jake, but after crying her eyes out the night he’d left, she hadn’t shed another tear on his behalf. Then again, maybe it was his fault.

  Just like the angel in It’s a Wonderful Life, Jake had pointed out all the ways she was connected to this town she called home. She would be missed when she moved to LA and that was a bigger deal for her than she’d acknowledged when she’d made her decision. It wasn’t a two-way street, either. She’d miss everything and everybody, especially her sweet mother. And that brought on another bout of tears.

 
Her mom left her purse to hold the table and stood so they could walk up and order. But then she took a closer look at her daughter and sat again. She motioned Amethyst to do the same. “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing. Everything.” She dabbed at her eyes.

  “Is it Jake?”

  “Not exactly.” She sighed. “I thought I knew what to do. If I want to make it as a singer, I need to go to LA, right?”

  “Probably. If you want to be a really big success, that’s quite likely the way to go.”

  “I’m scared.”

  “Oh, honey.” Her mother reached over and squeezed her hand. “You’ll be fine. You have a good head on your shoulders. I shouldn’t have said that about the drug dealers living next door. I’m sure that won’t happen.”

  “I’m not scared about what I’ll find there. Well, maybe a little, but that’s not what’s bothering me.” She swallowed. “I’m not even scared of failing, although I understand that’s a very real possibility. Mostly I’m scared of losing what I have here.”

  “You can’t really lose that. If it doesn’t work out, you can always come home.”

  Amethyst shook her head. “But, see, that’s the problem. If I go, I have to do it with all my heart. I can’t be thinking about running home at the first sign of trouble. I have to be totally committed to overcoming every obstacle, the way Finn was when he moved to Seattle and Matt was when he went to Hollywood. I have to want it so much that nothing else matters.”

  Her mother took a deep breath. “You’re right.”

  “So the way I figure it, I have to know in my gut that I’m willing to make the necessary sacrifices and right now I’m not sure if I’m willing to do that.”

  “Nobody said you had to leave tomorrow. If you need more time to think about it, then I say take what you need.”

  She nodded. “That’s good advice. And before you drive yourself crazy wondering whether to ask about Jake or not, let me put your mind at rest. I won’t be seeing him when I go to Jackson Hole. We called it quits.”

  “I see.”