You and I Forever

by Melissa Toppen

  “I will. All of it.” He leans down, laying a gentle kiss to my lips before I turn to face forward again. “I love you Anna.” He nuzzles his face into the crook of my neck. “I just want to protect you. I want to keep you safe always because I don't think I could survive if something ever happened to you, if I lost you.” He shakes his head at the thought.

  “You aren't going to lose me.” I say, snuggling deeper into his embrace. “There is nothing in this world that can keep me from you. And now we have this.” I say, sliding his soapy hands across my stomach. “We have our baby.” I say, the words still sounding foreign to me.

  “Look, I think you're showing.” He laughs lightly, tracing my stomach.

  “Shut up.” I laugh, looking down. At first I think he's messing with me but when I really look, my stomach definitely seems puffier than normal. If I didn't know I was pregnant, I probably would think I'm just bloated. But because I know I am pregnant, I see it for what it really is, the beginning of a small baby bump.

  “Won't be long now. I will be all swollen and fat. Then what will you do with me?” I huff.

  “I will love you is what I will do.” He breathes into my ear, looking down to where our hands are joined together against my belly.

  It's so strange. I never imagined this life for myself. A life where I would get married and have children. But Bentley has given me that. A life that I didn't even know I wanted until I had it. And now, I can't imagine the Anna I used to be. The one that didn't want love, that feared it actually. The one who craved her independence and her freedom and never wanted to tie herself to another person in any way.

  I didn't lose that Anna completely. She's still inside of me, my driving force. But it's with opening my heart to Bentley that I have opened myself up to what life is truly about. Love. Family. It's not about what you experience in this life, but who you experience it with. This is my priority now. This is what really matters. Bentley. Our baby. The future we get to have together. It's all I have ever wanted, my heart knew that much all along. It just took a while for my brain to catch up.

  Chapter

  Twenty-Five

  My stomach is a ball of nerves. I was already nervous enough to tell Bentley's mother about the fact that we got married without her there. Now, having to tell her that not only did we get married without telling her, but that she is also going to be a grandmother, is proving to be more than my poor nerves can handle.

  Bentley however, seems completely at ease. Weaving in and out of the early afternoon traffic as we head across town to have Thanksgiving with his mother and Shira. He glances briefly in my direction and catches me staring at him. Sensing my nervousness, he reaches across the center console and grabs my hand, squeezing my fingers gently.

  “It's going to be fine.” He promises, turning his eyes back on the road.

  “That's easy for you to say. She's your mother. She has to love you no matter what. Me on the other hand, she can hate. And I don't want her to hate me.” I huff.

  “She is not going to hate you. If anything, she is going to love you even more. She has been hounding me for the last five years about giving her a grandchild. Trust me, this is good news.” His lips turn up in a smile but he keeps his focus forward.

  “I'm worried she will think I did this intentionally to trap you.” I blurt, this being the first time I have voiced my true concerns to my husband.

  “Why would you say that?” He asks, his smile fading as he flicks his eyes between me and the road.

  “Because she's your mother and she worries about people being interested in you for your money.” I admit, assuming this can't be news to him.

  “Did she say something to you to make you think that?” He questions, his forehead drawing together.

  “Not really. I mean, she may have mentioned something the last time we were at her house.” I admit.

  “Anna.” He throws me a disbelieving look as pulls the car up to the curb outside of his mother's house. Shifting it into park, he lets out a loud exhale as he turns inward to face me. “Why did you not tell me that she said something to you?”

  “Because it wasn't anything serious and she was just worried about you.” I say, not wanting this to be a bigger deal than it is.

  “Anna, you have to tell me things like this.” He says, clearly a little agitated.

  “I'm sorry.” I say on a shrug. “She's your mom. I understand where she's coming from and I respect her concerns. I didn't think running to you over it was the way to show her that my feelings for you are genuine. I want to earn her trust by proving to her how much I love you, not by having it demanded by you.” His face immediately softens at my words.

  “You are pretty fantastic, you know that?” He tilts his head to the side and hits me with a lopsided grin.

  “I know.” I wrinkle my nose playfully at him before leaning in and laying a brief kiss across his mouth. “Now, can we please go inside and get this over with?” I pull back, my nervousness returning full force when I glance towards the house.

  “Relax. I will do all the talking and I promise you, everything is going to be just fine. Plus Shira and Ethan will be here so we'll have a bit of a buffer also.” He reminds me.

  Taking a deep breath, I give him the best smile I can muster before turning towards the door and pushing it open. He is out of the car and crossing to my side before my feet are even on the ground. Reaching for my hands, he helps me from the car and then closes the door behind me. While I definitely feel much better than I did a week ago, I am still a little sore, especially my abdomen. I feel like it takes me an eternity to get in and out of a car.

  “Ready?” He smiles down at me, linking my arm with his as he begins leading me towards the front door of his mother's townhouse.

  “As ready as I'll ever be.” I reply, squeezing his arm a little tighter than necessary. We don't even make it to the front steps before Rebecca pulls the door open and greets us.

  “Anna. It's so good to see you dear. How are you feeling?” She asks, pulling me in for a brief hug the moment we reach the top step.

  “I'm doing much better. Thank you.” I say, pulling back and allowing Bentley to guide me inside the house.

  “And the boy?” She questions, following us into the living room.

  “Still in jail Mom.” Bentley shakes his head at her. She picks up the message that he doesn't want to talk about it and immediately changes the subject.

  “I hope you two are hungry.” She smiles sweetly at me as Bentley helps me slide out of my jacket before laying it across the back of the couch.

  “Me too.” Shira sings as she appears through the door that leads into the kitchen. “Rebecca made enough food to feed a small army.” She laughs, shaking her head. “The table is set Bec, anything else you need me to do?” She asks, turning her attention to Bentley's mom.

  “No, no. I think we are ready.” Rebecca says, turning her attention back to me and Bentley. “Shall we?” She asks, waiting for Bentley's nod before heading into the dining room that sits just off of the kitchen.

  Ethan appears just moments after we take our seats. He nods at Bentley and then nudges me lightly as he slides into the seat next to me. “Glad to see you're okay.” He says, giving me a small smile when I turn my face towards him.

  “Thanks.” I manage to get out, surprised by how casual he seems. Ethan is not much of a talker normally but I think, given the information I know about him and Shira, that maybe he is starting to let me in a little.

  I don't know why I care so much, but the thought makes me extremely happy. I like Ethan. I mean sure, he's quiet and standoffish. But I saw a side to him in New York and then again in Seattle, that I doubt many people get to see. He's not the hard exterior that he makes people believe him to be. If I had to guess, I would say he's actually softer than most.

  “Well, dig in everyone.” Rebecca says, gesturing to the table that is covered with various dishes. “No sense in waiting for it to get cold.”

&nbs
p; “Just one second.” Bentley interjects. “Before we start eating, I have something I need to tell you.” He says, turning to face his mother. Setting down the mashed potato bowl in her hand, she gives Bentley her full attention.

  I try to keep my breathing even and my legs from bouncing under the table as he takes a deep breath and starts speaking again. “During our trip to Hawaii last month, Anna and I got married.” He says, not skipping a beat when his mother takes a sharp inhale, a look of complete shock pulling at her beautiful features.

  “Now, before you say anything.” He continues. “We are already planning a formal ceremony in January so that we can do our vows again in front of all our family and friends.”

  “You got married?” The words are barely audible as she looks disbelieving back and forth between me and Bentley.

  “That's not all.” Bentley takes a deep breath and I can feel Ethan shift beside me. Throwing a look in his direction, I immediately see that his interest is peeked. Glancing to Shira, the moment her eyes meet mine, her eyebrows shoot up in question. Knowing I can't say a thing to her, I only smile weakly and turn my eyes back to my husband. Not realizing until this very moment that no one here knows about the baby yet.

  “I'm pregnant.” I utter the words before Bentley has a chance to say anymore.

  “You're going to be a grandmother.” He tacks on, his mouth turning up in a full smile.

  “I'm going to be a grandma?” The words come out broken and her hand immediately covers her mouth.

  “You are.” I confirm, my eyes welling over a bit with her reaction. She seems shocked, of course. But there is so much more to her reaction. She isn't mad like I anticipated she would be. Quite the opposite actually.

  “What?” Shira's mouth practically hits the table, her eyes bouncing from me to Bentley to Rebecca and then back to me. I nod, throwing her a smile before turning my attention back to Rebecca.

  Pushing away from the table, she has Bentley wrapped in a hug before I can even process her movements. Rocking him back and forth in her arms, she laughs, hitting me with a wide smile. “I thought I would never see the day.” She pulls away from Bentley, wiping at the tears that are now flowing down her cheeks.

  “Come here.” She says, standing and crossing the space towards me. I turn just in time for her to lean down and wrap her arms around my shoulders, pulling me against her petite frame. “Congratulations.” She pulls back and beams down at me.

  “You're not upset?” I ask, once she settles back down into her chair.

  “Heavens no.” She shakes her head, grabbing her napkin to dry her tear stained face. “Why on earth would you think I would be?” She asks, her eyes pinned firmly on mine.

  “We were worried that you would be upset that we got married without telling you.” Bentley chimes in, pulling her attention to him. Thankful to be out of her gaze, I take a deep shaky inhale and try to calm the quiver in my hands.

  “Well, I'm not thrilled that no one told me but I could never be upset that you found someone that you loved so much you couldn't wait to marry her.” She reaches across the space and pats the back of his hand. “I am so happy for you honey. This is all I have ever wanted for you.” She beams at her only child.

  “I can't believe no one told me you were having a baby.” Shira pulls the attention from everyone at the table as she leans back in her chair and crosses her arms in front of her chest.

  “We just found out last week.” Bentley explains. “We haven't told anyone up to this point so technically, you are the first to know.” He says, obviously leaving out that Andrea and Lo both know.

  “You've known a whole week?” She gapes at him before pinning her eyes on me. “Really?” She huffs playfully in my direction.

  Shaking my head, I open my mouth to speak but then close it again when Ethan clears his throat next to me. “Since this seems to be the time for confessions, I have something I would like to say as well.” He says, turning to meet Shira's gaze.

  “Shira Monroe, I am in love with you.” He says, causing a look of shock to take over her perfect face. If I had to guess, I would say this whole love thing is news to her. “I am in love with you and I want the world to know. Bentley.” He says, turning his attention past me to my husband. “I'm sorry that I didn't come to you earlier about this but I'm done hiding it. If that means my job then so be it.”

  Bentley surprises everyone when he leans his head back and lets out a full belly laugh that echos around the small room. Turning to face him, for a moment I think maybe he's lost his mind. My eyes flip to everyone at the table. Rebecca seems completely unphased, Shira looks like she is about to puke, Ethan is white as a ghost and then there's Bentley, laughing like a damn fool while everyone else watches him in nervous silence.

  “Wow.” He laughs again, shaking his head back and forth. “You two really think I didn't know you were involved?” He questions, flicking his eyes towards Shira whose cheeks immediately flush red.

  “How long?” She asks, her voice shaking slightly.

  “Since before Logans opened.” He smiles, clearly enjoying that he seems to be a step ahead of his very clever sister. Clearly he is ahead of me as well considering I did not find out until opening night.

  “But how?” She gapes at him.

  “I saw you two in a pretty heated embrace behind the club in Seattle.” He laughs. “You clearly did not realize the security cameras were already functioning at that time.”

  “And you didn't say anything?” She squeaks, throwing her hands up in the air.

  “It wasn't my place.” He sits back casually, crossing his arms in front of himself. “What you two do is your business.” He turns towards Ethan. “As long as it doesn't effect your work, which it hasn't, I don't care who you date.” He turns back to Shira.

  “Well, now that we've cleared all that up.” Rebecca chimes in, pulling the attention of all four of us to her. “I would say we all have a lot to be thankful for today, on the day of giving thanks.” She smiles around the table. “But I would just like to point out.” She turns to Shira. “I told you so.” She wags a finger at her and laughs lightly.

  We all immediately start laughing and the tension that weighed heavily just moments ago, seems to evaporate into thin air. The conversation flows freely from there. During our meal, we talk about the baby, the house we are building, our time in Hawaii, the wedding ceremony in January and what arrangements have already been made.

  Everyone seems completely relaxed and for the first time in a very long time, I feel like things are finally coming together. Bentley jokes freely with Ethan and Shira over their not so secret relationship. Rebecca gushes over how happy she is about becoming a grandmother. This is the first Thanksgiving I can ever remember where I actually feel like I am part of the family I am sitting with.

  I don't feel like an outsider or an unwanted guest like I did during my time in foster care. And while I loved being with both my grandmother and Patty during the holidays, it was only ever just us and lacked the social interaction, the laughter and voices filling the air. And while I miss them both terribly, in some strange way I feel like they are here with me.

  “You okay?” Bentley pulls me from my thoughts, his hand coming to rest on top of mine. Turning my face inwards, my stomach immediately twists when his sparkling blue eyes land on me.

  “Perfect.” I smile, flipping my hand over and tangling my fingers with his. “Absolutely perfect.” I repeat, looking down to where our two hands are weaved together into one discombobulated, tangled, beautiful mess.

  A beautiful mess..... Just like us.

  Chapter

  Twenty-Six

  “You ready?” Andrea's voice pulls my attention from the paperwork in front of me. Looking up, I see her smiling at me from the doorway of my office.

  “Ready for what?” I ask, having no idea why she is even here.

  “For your I got married and am having a baby celebration.” She laughs, crossing her arms in front of her
chest.

  “Since when am I having an I got married and am having a baby celebration?” I ask on a laugh, scribbling my signature down on the last of a few documents that Shira drew up for me to sign.

  “Since me and Lo got together and decided we were throwing you one. Though, when we planned it there was no baby so we had to rework things a bit.” She smiles mischievously at me.

  “You and Lo got together?” I cock my head to the side, not able to contain the smile stretching across my entire face. “Now that is a recipe for disaster if there ever was one.”

  “Hey now.” She laughs. “Give a girl a little credit.”

  “Oh I will give you credit, when it's due.” I shake my head at her, stacking up the signed documents for Shira and scooting them to the side before turning in my chair to face her.

  “Shut it.” She huffs. “Now get your stuff and come on.”

  “Sorry but I can't.” I say, pushing out of my chair and stepping past her, crossing the lobby to the front desk.

  “Um. Yes you can.” She turns to face me. “And you are. I've already cleared it with the old ball and chain.”

  “Is that so?” I laugh.

  “Hell yes it is.” I hear Lo before I see her.

  “Where the hell did you come from?” I ask the moment she appears from the hallway.

  “I had to use the ladies.” She laughs, crossing the space towards us. “Now get your shit and lets book it. This girl needs some drinks and some dick, stat.” She lays a playful kiss to my cheek the moment she reaches me.

  “Uh oh.” I laugh, landing my eyes directly on her when she steps back. “What happened?” I ask, knowing drinks and dick is code for 'fuck my life' in Lo language.