Until Tomorrow

by Rosanne Bittner

  “Completely.”

  They studied each other, both feeling a mutual respect neither thought could be possible. “You’ll never fully trust me, will you, Cole?”

  “No,” Cole answered.

  Grant laughed. “I can’t blame you there.” He glanced at Addy. “But I mean every word of it. I’ll be eternally grateful, and I’ll help the both of you any way you need it.” He looked back at Cole, leaning closer. “When I saw my son hanging by that rope, I wanted to die. You gave him back to me. When he fell into my arms, all my wealth and success became suddenly nothing. I was holding the only thing genuinely good about my life, the only thing that truly mattered. It opened my eyes to a lot of things. I’ll say it once, and I want you to believe me when I say it comes from the heart—and this bastard does have a heart somewhere down under all the hard businessman he is on the outside—just a plain thank you, Cole. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.”

  Their eyes held. “I accept,” Cole finally said.

  Grant reached down and took his right hand and shook it. “To the winner goes the spoils. I hope you and Addy have a good life together.” He blinked quickly and turned away, leaving the room.

  Cole looked at Addy. “Can you … believe that?”

  “I think it’s wonderful.” Addy kept hold of his hand. “And we will have a good life together, Cole. I just hope you can finally give up that gun and not have to live by it any more.”

  He squeezed her hand with the small bit of strength he had. “No more guns. I’m through with all that, Addy. I want a wife again, a family. I want some peace. The war ended two years ago, but it continued to … rage in my heart. That war is over too, now. You helped end it.”

  She felt a lump swell in her throat, and she leaned down to kiss his hand. “I knew the day we parted when you took me back to Unionville that I loved you, Cole. I tried to deny it, even after Abilene … but it was always there.”

  “It was … the same for me. I was just afraid … to care about anybody again. But I couldn’t … forget you.”

  His voice drifted, his eyes closed. Addy leaned down and kissed his cheek again. “I love you, Cole Parker.” Her eyes teared. “We made it. Just get better soon.”

  Spring 1868 …

  If there was one thing Central was known for, it was for making a grand event out of the simplest happening. Since the beautiful young schoolteacher, Addy Kane, was marrying the very honored Cole Parker, the ladies of society had agreed it should be a spectacular wedding, with even important people from Denver invited. Gossip among the women, Addy knew from suggestive questions, had been the fact that she had turned down Grant Breckenridge for a man of far less wealth; but it amused Addy to see them tittering and whispering among themselves about the reasons why she would do such a thing. She had no doubt they all considered Cole not only a hero, but a damn handsome one at that. Grant himself had helped quell any rumors that he might have any hard feelings. He had made sure everyone believed he and Addy had never been more than casual friends. There had never been a romance between them, and after all, Cole had saved his and his son’s lives. How could he have hard feelings against a man like that?

  It was Grant who had worked with the women’s circle to plan a lavish wedding for Addy and Cole, footing the bill himself. Addy thought it ironic that after all she and Cole had been through, hiding their relationship, trying to stay apart, then trying to figure out how they could be together, that now they should be marrying in such a flamboyant manner. Elizabeth Howley had made her an absolutely extravagant wedding dress of ivory satin shipped up from Denver. The gown was completely covered with an overlay of hand-made lace of astounding beauty and intricacy. A coronet of crystal-beaded flowers leading to a hem-length veil adorned her deep auburn hair, which was piled on top of her head in a cascade of curls.

  She stood in an upstairs bedroom of Hester’s house and looked at herself in a mirror while Hester and Ethel Brown fussed and pulled and arranged things, excitedly looking her over to be sure everything looked right. Was this really happening? Even the weather had cooperated. There was still snow on the surrounding mountains, but in town things had dried out. The sun shone brightly, and it was warm, all necessary for today’s ceremony, which would take place outdoors because most of the town wanted to watch. Hester and others had made quite a public event out of it, which Cole was not crazy about, but they seemed to have no choice in the matter. After a long, cold, eventless winter, people were ready for a reason to celebrate. The ceremony would take place on Eureka street at the site of a planned Methodist Church, and the couple would then get into a fancy carriage provided by Grant and pulled by two white horses. The carriage would take them down Eureka to Main, down Main street and around and down Spring Street to Lawrence, then back up to a spot on Main where cake and punch would be served and where people could come and express their congratulations to the happy couple.

  Already Addy knew it would be difficult to have to put up with all of that, waiting for the only thing she and Cole really wanted … to be in each other’s arms at night. It had taken several weeks for him to fully recover, and over the winter he had brought his strength and weight back to normal. During that time they saw each other socially, gently breaking the news to Central’s elite that Mrs. Addy Kane was interested in Cole Parker romantically. To be sure not one ugly rumor was ever spread, Cole had not come visiting her in the night. They had decided to wait until they were married, but a month ago the waiting had become impossible. They loved each other too much, needed each other too much. They had allowed themselves one glorious, passionate night together, and never had their union been more fulfilling, knowing that soon, at last, they would be married and wouldn’t need to hide their love any longer.

  After a long day of ceremony and celebrating, the carriage driver would take them to a new house Cole had had built for them in the hills above town. It was not yet completely finished, but enough for them to spend tonight there as husband and wife and celebrate their new home.

  “So beautiful!” Ethel Brown exclaimed. The woman had taken a surprising change in attitude toward her. Addy supposed it was because she was not marrying the richest man in town after all, or because she was satisfied that there was nothing dark and unknown about her past … or perhaps it was simply because Grant Breckenridge approved of this, so that made it all right.

  “Ravishing is a better word,” Hester added. “I think you’re ready, dear.”

  Both women were gussied up in their own finest, Ethel Brown wearing a feathered hat so extravagant that Addy thought it bordered on something a prostitute would wear. She would not, of course, tell Ethel that, for she seemed to think she had never looked more lovely. The thought of her looking like a prostitute was preposterously funny, and Addy stemmed an urge to laugh. The thought brought to mind Sassy Dillon. She would have loved an occasion like this, and would have liked to know she and Cole were marrying. It was too bad she couldn’t be here, but she lived on in a strikingly pretty little girl with dimpled cheeks.

  Two weeks ago Addy had taken time off from teaching and had gone to Denver, with the excuse she wanted to do some shopping for her new home and for her wedding; but she had used the trip to find the Donnavans, explaining she had known Sassy and that she was marrying Cole Parker. The gracious Mrs. Donnavan had let her inside, and she had immediately been touched when she met Lissy, who was every bit like her real mother in her outgoing personality and vivaciousness, and she was a child of exquisite beauty, with bouncing blond curls and a smile that would melt anyone’s heart. It was no wonder she had won over Cole, a man with a soft spot for little girls. At least now he seemed to have overcome his grief and loneliness over Patty. He had told her the nightmares were finally gone, and he had not had a drink of liquor all winter. He was a changed man, and he insisted it was her love that had changed him. But Addy believed the change was due to his own strength, the good man deep inside that was the true Nick Coleman. The only thing
he couldn’t do was use his real name. Nick Coleman was supposed to be dead, and truly he was.

  Hester and Ethel helped her down the stairs, Ethel picking up the train of her dress and veil so they did not get soiled. She climbed into the waiting carriage, feeling like a princess. The driver turned and handed her a lovely bouquet of spring wild-flowers, the only kind of flowers available in a remote mountain town. Flowers shipped up from Denver usually were wilted by the time they arrived. The stems of the wildflowers were wrapped in cloth so she would not soil her ivory satin gloves. The carriage was off, and Addy could still hear Hester and Ethel chattering like excited magpies as they climbed into their own carriages, their husbands already waiting for them.

  From then on the day became dreamlike. Addy was flabbergasted at the crowd that lined the streets in town. The carriage drew close to the church site, and right behind her were Hester and Ethel, quickly walking up to help her get down. The driver pulled the carriage out of the way, and now Addy could see Cole waiting for her. Never had he looked more handsome, wearing pin-stripe pants, a gray satin, double-breasted vest set off by a bow tie and a black frock coat. Her heart pounded with anticipation and joy. At last!

  A piano had been set outside, and Susan Howard began playing the wedding march as Ethel spread out the train of Addy’s dress and Hester pulled the veil over her face. James Breckenridge stepped up beside her, a very handsome young man who was already being hounded by Central’s available young ladies.

  “You ready, Mrs. Kane?”

  Addy looked at him, wanted to hug him. He was the reason this moment had come to be. And because of his respect for Cole, he had agreed to escort Addy. Grant Breckenridge, of all people, was best man. He stood beside Cole, looking quite handsome himself in an obviously expensive suit, his dark hair slicked back—a charmer, he was, but not charming enough for Addy Kane. Grant Breckenridge was no Cole Parker.

  Hester walked over to stand near Cole, taking a bouquet of wildflowers from one of the other women nearby who had held it for her. Hester would be Addy’s matron of honor.

  “Let’s go,” James told Addy, taking her arm.

  A distance of several yards had been left for her to walk to Cole, and in spite of hundreds of people watching the ceremony, Addy was aware only of Cole. She never took her eyes from his as she came closer, and he never wavered in his own gaze. She could tell he was remembering the same things she was … a bank robbery, an abduction, a rescue … a liaison in the wild western town of Abilene … the pain of thinking they must part … an Indian attack … another liaison … How many times had this man been there to rescue her? How many times had they made love and then said good-bye, only to be unable to bear being apart?

  There were other memories, memories that hurt, memories that had to be left behind now as they started a new life, a new family, together. They would always carry certain secrets that no one else would know. The whole town would think that tonight would be their first coming together. Only Addy and Cole knew about the precious, tender, passionate moments they had shared, first out of need and desire, then out of a burning love that could not be quenched, a love that had been tested over and over.

  Now she was beside him, pledging herself to him. Her first marriage almost seemed as if it had never happened. She had been young, and they had been together such a short time … and now it seemed like such a long time ago.

  “For better, for worse … in sickness and in health …” No matter the past, Addy thought. Looking only to the future. Cole slipped a wedding band on her finger. More words. He lifted her veil, leaned down and kissed her lightly, flicking his tongue against her lips suggestively, reminding her that tonight they would do much more than kiss.

  “I love you, Addy Parker,” he said softly.

  Addy Parker. She was Mrs. Cole Parker now. “And I love you so, Cole,” she answered, tears in her eyes. This was real. She was his wife. He grinned, picked her up off her feet and whirled her around. The entire town broke into an uproar, and the celebrating was on, Central City style. No one knew better how to celebrate the smallest event in the grandest way than the members of these wild little mining towns. Cole kept an arm around Addy during the parade of their carriage around town, and Addy could not help blushing at the remarks made by some of the miners. Saloons were already in an uproar, the Hard Luck packed. Cole had turned the upstairs into an eatery, and it was a respectable place now.

  Finally the carriage stopped in the middle of Main Street, where a platform had been erected for the bride and groom and Central’s dignitaries. Gifts were stacked everywhere, and women had been hired to serve cake and punch to whoever wanted some. Addy supposed just about every woman in Central must have baked a cake for the occasion, there were so many ready and waiting to feed the hundreds of well-wishers.

  Sheriff Sam Watson came over to congratulate them. “You realize, Cole, that the whole town wants you to run for sheriff when I retire in a couple of months, don’t you? You’d be perfect for the job.”

  Cole looked at Addy, stifling an urge to laugh. If only Watson knew the truth. But that was not the reason he wouldn’t take the job. “I’d have to turn them down,” he answered, giving Addy a squeeze. “I’m a married man now, and I want a family. I’m through with guns, Sheriff. The closest I’ll get is I intend to open a shop for selling and repairing firearms. That’s one thing I know like the back of my hand, but I’m not going to live by the gun. Not any more.”

  “Well, the job is yours if you want it. There’s no doubt in my mind who everybody would vote for.” Watson congratulated them again and left.

  Addy looked up at Cole. “I hope you mean that, Cole. I couldn’t bear worrying about you getting shot at, you always needing to wear a gun.”

  He kissed her cheek. “I was a family man once, Mrs. Parker. I want that life back. I intend to be nothing more than a gunsmith and a business owner … a husband and a father.”

  Addy could hide the news no longer. “Good, because you are going to be a father, sooner than you think.”

  He sobered, studying her eyes. “What?”

  “Remember that visit you paid me a month ago?”

  A deeper love moved into his dark eyes. “You’re carrying?”

  “I’m almost sure. I’ve missed my time.” She blushed at the words, embarrassed to have to talk about such things, even with Cole.

  A rush of emotions swept through Cole. A baby! He would be a father again. It almost frightened him to think how much he would love this baby, because he would never forget how it felt to lose a child. But he wouldn’t lose this one. The war was over. This time his family would know only peace. He pulled her close. “Thank you, Addy.”

  She put her arms around his neck, and a few whistles and cheers came from the watching crowd. Their gaze met, and he kissed her hungrily, amid whoops and hollers and raised whiskey bottles. Women began serving cake, and Cole and Addy spent the next several hours accepting gifts and good wishes.

  “You think Cole would really turn down a chance to be sheriff?” Sam Watson asked Grant. “He’d be damn good, better than me, I have to admit. Not many men would give Cole Parker any trouble.”

  Grant nodded. “I agree. But then the man deserves a little peace in his life.” He grinned. “I’ll say one thing. I doubt anybody could handle robbers and outlaws better than Cole Parker. He seems to have a knack for understanding how they think.”

  “Folks say maybe he hunted renegade outlaw soldiers after the war. He doesn’t talk much about his past,” Watson said. “Sometimes I look into those eyes and I see a desperado. What do you think?”

  Grant put a hand on the sheriff’s shoulder. “Watson, sometimes a man’s past is better left just that—the past.”

  “What does that mean? You know something I don’t?”

  Grant grinned. “I only know that Cole Parker is now a respected citizen of the city of Central, and because of him, my son and I are alive. That’s all I need to know,
all anybody needs to know.”

  Watson nodded. “I understand. It’s just interesting to try to imagine how he got so good with those guns.”

  “Well, my friend, it might be worth a lot of money to you not to look into it.”

  Watson grinned. “How much?”

  “Name your price.”

  Watson laughed. “That much, huh?” He rubbed his chin. “Well, I like the man, and Mrs. Kane, too—Mrs. Parker, I should say. You don’t have to pay me to stay out of the man’s past. He looks pretty happy now. I’ll leave it that way.”

  “Good decision,” Grant answered, a warning look in his dark eyes. An orchestra hired from Denver began playing, and Cole and Addy danced, first with each other, then Cole with Hester and Ethel and some of the other ladies among Central’s finest; Addy danced with Sheriff Watson, Dr. Jonesboro, Lee Brown, even John Withers, who had once tried to destroy her reputation. She danced with Grant, and he kissed her cheek. “That’s for what might have been,” he told her.

  The afternoon turned to dusk, and finally the happy couple was able to get back in the carriage and go off to their new home, amid cheers and well wishes. Central would celebrate tonight, and so would Cole and Addy Parker … and they wouldn’t need friends and whiskey and dancing to have a good time. They would need only each other.

  More from Rosanne Bittner

  Full Circle

  The last thing sheltered missionary Evelyn Gibbons wants upon arriving at the South Dakota reservation is to fall in love. Yet, from the moment she clashes with Black Hawk, the complicated man of the Sioux, she knows he’s everything she could ever want, and everything she can never have.

  Living in the hills with his young son, Black Hawk reveres the ways of his people and is determined to preserve Sioux traditions. But when he meets Evelyn, a woman from the society he most abhors, not even his own prejudices can smother the flame of desire that burns for her.