Never Mind The Botox: Rachel

by Penny Avis

  ‘You see, not hard, is it? I should become a relationship counsellor,’ said Rachel.

  ‘You might still need to,’ said Rowan. ‘Long way to go yet. Anyway, the reason I wanted to see you was to ask a favour.’

  ‘Shoot,’ said Rachel.

  ‘Well, Laura was fairly happy about leaving Naomi at Mum’s but was a bit concerned that, well, sometimes Mum can be a bit dippy. She’d feel a lot happier if you were there as well.’

  ‘Me! I don’t know anything about babies. Why would she want me there?’

  ‘She just thinks that you’re smart and organised and that you’d be a big help to Mum − you know, check that she sticks with the schedule, pays attention, that sort of thing.’

  ‘She managed to bring both of us up just fine,’ said Rachel, suddenly feeling rather protective of her so-called dippy mother.

  ‘Apart from when she left the back gate open and you ended up playing in the road by yourself until one of our neighbours brought you back. You were only four. Or when she forgot to get me from school and went to play bridge with her friends. It took the school three hours to get hold of someone to come and get me,’ said Rowan.

  ‘Alright, fair enough,’ said Rachel, nodding. ‘When were you thinking of going?’

  ‘This weekend. Strike while the iron is, er, hot, so to speak.’ Rowan realised he hadn’t chosen the best expression.

  ‘I’ll need to take some work with me,’ said Rachel, thinking of her report deadline.

  ‘I’m sure that would be fine. Mum will be looking after Naomi most of the time.’

  That might work quite well, thought Rachel. It would give her a chance to get plenty of work done away from the distraction of Harry.

  ‘Okay, no problem. I’ll go.’

  ‘Thanks, Rachel, I’m really grateful,’ said Rowan.

  ‘I spoke to Shali, by the way, told her that you didn’t want to see her again,’ said Rachel.

  ‘I know, she texted me,’ said Rowan.

  ‘She didn’t! When?’

  ‘The next day,’ said Rowan.

  ‘What for? What did she want?’ Rachel asked anxiously.

  ‘Oh nothing much, just to say sorry and check how I was.’

  ‘Did you text her back?’

  ‘Of course I did. I’m not that rude. Anyway, it was just pleasantries, nothing more.’

  You don’t know Shali, thought Rachel. She was furious. Shali needed to back off and leave Rowan alone.

  ‘You’re not going to see her again, are you?’ Rachel asked.

  ‘No I’m not, stop worrying. It’s all about Laura now.’

  ‘Hmm, well make sure you don’t. I know what Shali’s like; she’d have you twisted round her little finger before you know it.’

  ‘For goodness sake, I’m not that easily led,’ said Rowan.

  Rachel just raised her eyebrows at him and said nothing.

  ‘Anyway, I’m not seeing her, so let’s not talk about it any more. Will you call Mum and square off this weekend with her?’

  ‘Yes, I’ll call her tonight.’

  ‘Thanks, sis’, you’re a life saver.’

  Let’s hope I’m a marriage saver as well, thought Rachel.

  She called her mum later that evening. Her mum was over the moon at the prospect of having both her daughter and granddaughter for the weekend. Rachel also broke the news to Harry, who was much less enthusiastic.

  ‘What, a whole weekend again?’

  ‘Rowan really needs to take Laura away and try to sort things out. They really want me to help Mum, so I said I would. Plus I’ve got a stack of work to do, so I wouldn’t be much fun anyway even if I was here,’ said Rachel.

  ‘You and your work, honestly. Is it still that tits and arse job?’

  ‘Cosmetic surgery job, I think you mean, and yes it is. We’re reporting soon and there’s a lot riding on it. I can’t afford to miss the deadline.’

  Rachel decided to tell Harry about seeing Francesca Hart. Perhaps if he thought the job was a bit more exciting he’d be less grumpy about her working on it all weekend.

  ‘Look, Harry, you really mustn’t say anything but you’ll never guess who I saw when I was out there,’ said Rachel.

  ‘Who?’ said Harry, intrigued.

  ‘Only Francesca Hart. She came in one evening for some sort of private appointment when I was working late.’

  ‘No!’ said Harry. ‘She’s a total babe already. What on the earth is she having done?’

  ‘A nose job, I think. It’s not exactly huge now, just a bit prominent. I guess she wants one of those little button noses instead.’

  ‘You should sell that story to the papers,’ said Harry. ‘It would be worth a fortune.’

  Rachel was horrified at the suggestion. ‘Don’t be an idiot. I can’t possibly do that. Not only am I bound by about a thousand ethical rules at work but it would also be illegal.’

  ‘It’s not illegal, not if you have evidence to support it.’

  Rachel thought fleetingly about the photocopied pages from the black book, but then dismissed them firmly from her mind.

  ‘Harry, we are not having this conversation. I only told you about it as a bit of work gossip. You are not to mention it to anyone, okay?’

  ‘Okay, keep your hair on,’ said Harry. ‘So what am I supposed to do while you’re at home beavering away on your “Celebrity doesn’t get a nose job” report?’ said Harry.

  ‘Honestly, Harry, I’ve never known you be short of things to do. Stop being such a drama queen − it’s only a weekend. And besides, I’ll be back on Sunday afternoon, so we can still go out Sunday evening.’

  ‘Alright, I guess I’ll live. So can we go to Jimmy Macks on Sunday then? They’ve got a band on I really want to see,’ said Harry.

  Jimmy Macks was a scruffy pub turned club with beer on the floor and disgusting toilets. Rachel hated it. What a rubbish compromise.

  ‘If you like,’ she said.

  ‘I like,’ said Harry.

  You would, thought Rachel.

  As she lay in bed later, Rachel was still furious that Shali had been texting Rowan. She wasn’t sure why it annoyed her so much. Maybe she was being unfair. She knew she should be equally livid with Rowan, but somehow she just wasn’t.

  She’d also found out from AJ that the venue had complained to Payne Stanley about ‘inappropriate behaviour by certain guests’, sending the office into a frenzy of rumours. What if the partners decided to launch an investigation? Would it matter that it was her brother? She didn’t know and didn’t want to find out. Maybe she should talk to Natalie, see what she thought. She was never short of an opinion.

  Rachel got into Beau Street early the next morning so she could get enough work done to meet Natalie later on.

  ‘Good morning, Ms Altman,’ said the security guard as she arrived. ‘Sun was up just after five a.m. today, not long after you, I think.’

  ‘Good morning, Fred, busy day ahead,’ said Rachel.

  ‘You work too hard,’ said Fred, shaking his head at her.

  ‘Only as hard as I need to,’ said Rachel.

  She worked on her report without stopping for five straight hours. She got all her sales analysis finished and most of the expenses analysis too. She’d expected to find looking at the Beau Street cost base quite boring, but in fact had found it fascinating. She’d been shocked at the mark-up on Botox: it cost much less to buy than she’d thought. God, what a swizz. She bet most people had no idea. The salary information had been quite an eye-opener too. The doctors all did very nicely, thank you. And there were the big bills for incontinence pants. What was that all about? Rachel didn’t know and didn’t want to.

  Once she was done, she decided to have a look at some of the names she’d written down from the pages of Lloyd Cassidy’s black book. She obviously hadn’t said anything to Rosa and AJ about her spying on the Francesca Hart meeting or breaking into Lloyd’s office. H
ardly role model behaviour.

  ‘Could I use the computer?’ Rachel asked Rosa. They’d been given a computer with access to the accounting records so they could run sample accuracy tests on some of the databases.

  ‘Yes, I’m done for the moment thanks,’ replied Rosa.

  Rachel started with the Francesca Hart entry. She searched the client database for her name. Nothing. Maybe they hadn’t put it on the system yet; it had only been a day. She went to an entry from a month earlier: ‘Lisa Albrecht, June Mayfield, breast augmentation, 22 April, £6,850’. She vaguely recognised the first name, so she did a quick internet search. Lisa Albrecht was a children’s TV presenter. Rachel searched the client database for her name. Nothing. That was odd; her record should have been on the system by now. She searched again for the name June Mayfield. Bingo! A client record popped up on the screen. She looked at the details. The procedure listed was showing as ‘other’ and the invoice was shown as paid in cash. The doctor code was six-zero-two, Lloyd Cassidy.

  Rachel was confused. What was the connection between June Mayfield and Lisa Albrecht? Why were they together in the black book? She didn’t get it.

  She checked the employee database for both names. Maybe there was a connection there. Neither came up. She sat back in her chair and stared out the window. What was she missing?

  She hurried out into the accounts department and pulled out the original invoice. It showed that June Mayfield had had breast augmentation on 22 April. What had happened to Lisa Albrecht? And then it was like someone had turned the light on − Rachel suddenly got it. They were the same person! Lisa Albrecht had been booked in under a false name. So that was the deal! Lloyd Cassidy was working for celebrities who would pay over the odds for total anonymity. By booking them in under a false name, there were no records that they’d ever had anything done. And that’s why they had to pay in cash. Credit cards or cheques would show their real names. Christ! It was all a bit grubby, as well as totally unethical.

  Rachel felt a bit sick. Her gut feeling had been right. There was an issue, a proper big ugly deal issue that she couldn’t make go away. Shit, she would have to tell Carl, but if she did she’d have to deal with the Audrey question. Audrey was clearly right in the middle of some dodgy scam, and if Rachel was going to blow the whistle, she had to know for sure whether or not Carl was seeing her first. And what would they tell Equinox? No one was going to be happy. Fuck, fuck! What a nightmare!

  Rachel needed some fresh air and decided to walk to meet Natalie. As she paced her way anxiously up and down the busy streets towards the tapas restaurant where they were meeting, she ran through her options. Maybe she should just do nothing. After all, no one else knew what she’d found or seen. If she did nothing then the deal would probably still happen. That would be better for her career. And if she did nothing, she wouldn’t have to ask Carl about his relationship with Audrey. That would be better for her career too! Doing nothing was definitely an attractive option.

  But it would be going against every ethical standard she’d ever been trained in. She was a professional and that meant she should investigate the matter thoroughly and report her findings, whatever the consequences. That would be the right and proper thing to do. Equinox could find out anyway after buying the business and then try to sue Payne Stanley for negligence or something. That would be a disaster. She should report what she knew.

  But what if she did that and it fucked up her career? She had the director promotion panels coming up. Shopping her boss for shagging a dodgy client and killing his big deal at the same time hardly seemed like ideal preparation.

  It was a total and utter mess. She decided she needed more time to think.

  She was exhausted and starving by the time she met Natalie. ‘I need food and soon, otherwise I might fall over,’ said Rachel.

  They grabbed a table in the corner of the restaurant where they ordered a jug of sangria and enough plates of tapas to feed a small army.

  ‘Tough day?’ Natalie asked.

  Rachel thought about telling Natalie all about her Beau Street crisis but decided she needed to keep the ‘do nothing’ option well and truly open and that meant keeping it to herself. At least for now. She did want to talk to Natalie about Rowan and Shali, though, which suddenly seemed almost like light relief.

  ‘Yeah, not the best. We’re right up against it with this reporting deadline on Beau Street. I’ve been working late most nights and I guess it’s just catching up with me,’ said Rachel.

  ‘Have you heard about the summer party “incident”? Apparently the venue has complained.’

  ‘Yes, I heard; my team told me,’ said Rachel.

  ‘The whole place is talking about it, trying to work out who it might have been. Most people reckon it was a couple of the new graduates. Young enough to still have the energy and inexperienced enough not to know better,’ said Natalie, laughing.

  ‘Natalie, I need to tell you something and you have to promise not to say a word to anyone. I mean it, not a word,’ said Rachel.

  ‘Rachel, you can trust me. We’ve been friends forever!’

  ‘I know, I know, but just to make it totally clear, this is between you and me only, okay?’

  ‘Okay, not a word to anyone,’ said Natalie and sat forward in her chair expectantly.

  ‘I know who the couple are,’ said Rachel.

  ‘You do?’ Natalie was amazed. ‘How?’

  ‘I saw them come out of the side room.’

  ‘Well, come on then. Who was it?’

  ‘Shali and Rowan,’ said Rachel.

  Natalie’s face dropped. ‘You’re joking?’ she asked eventually.

  ‘I wish I was,’ said Rachel, rubbing her forehead.

  ‘God, I’m shocked. You could have lined up half the room, in fact nearly all of the room, before I would have got to them.’

  ‘I couldn’t believe it either. I was bloody livid,’ said Rachel.

  ‘What about his wife and baby, not to mention the whole happily ever after bit?’

  ‘Not that this is any excuse but Rowan hasn’t been getting on that well with Laura recently. He thinks that she’s not interested in him since the baby arrived. And Harry got Rowan totally off his face playing stupid drinking games, which didn’t help.’

  ‘You know there’s going to be an investigation,’ said Natalie.

  ‘Are you sure?’ Rachel asked. ‘I heard that wasn’t confirmed.’ Rachel was still worried by the prospect. It would hardly help her reputation.

  ‘You may be right. I don’t think it has been confirmed. That’s just the general view I’ve heard. They could be wrong, though,’ said Natalie. ‘Honestly, trust Shali – what an idiot she is!’

  ‘Bloody disgrace, more like,’ said Rachel, unable to help herself.

  ‘Hmm, well, not exactly helpful anyway and pretty careless to get caught, at work of all places.’ Natalie shook her head. ‘What a nightmare for her.’

  ‘Don’t feel sorry for her!’ said Rachel. ‘She threw herself at Rowan. It serves her right.’

  Natalie looked a bit taken aback by the venom in Rachel’s voice. ‘That’s a bit harsh, isn’t it? She might have been a bit stupid but she’s a mate of ours, and if they find out who it was they could have her up for unprofessional behaviour. That could be really serious for her.’

  ‘What about me?’ Rachel asked.

  ‘What about you?’

  ‘Well, it will hardly look good for me either. I invited Rowan,’ said Rachel.

  ‘Oh stop being so ridiculous,’ said Natalie in her typically forthright way. ‘They’re not investigating Rowan; he doesn’t even work for us. And they can hardly blame the person who invited him. That would be total nonsense. It might be a bit embarrassing for you, but no worse than that.’

  Yup, never short of opinion, thought Rachel, annoyed by the fact that Natalie hadn’t just agreed with her.

  ‘I still think Shali should have known bette
r and she is supposed to be my friend and I really don’t need to be caught up in any more scandals. She’s been texting him since, you know. I wouldn’t put it past her to try to keep something going.’

  ‘Do you think Rowan might want that?’ Natalie asked.

  ‘No, he told me he definitely didn’t. He wants to work things out with Laura,’ said Rachel.

  ‘Well, I really wouldn’t worry then, Rach. They just got carried away and it will all blow over pretty quickly.’

  ‘God, I hope so. I still think Shali should have known that I’d be upset and backed off,’ said Rachel, not ready to let it go.

  ‘I doubt she was thinking that laterally at the time,’ said Natalie. ‘I really wouldn’t take it so personally. And anyway, what about Rowan − surely he’s equally to blame?’

  ‘Yes, yes, I know, you’re right. I had a go at Rowan too, told him what an idiot he’d been.’

  ‘Look, Rachel, I know it’s not great and I can see how upset you are. But I really don’t think that you should fall out with Shali over it. She’s probably going to need our support, not another bollocking.’

  Rachel knew that Natalie was probably right and it was much worse for them than for her, but somehow that didn’t make her feel better or any less cross with Shali.

  Chapter 11

  Rachel was on the way home to help look after Naomi while Rowan took Laura away for the weekend. She’d spent most of the last couple of days worrying, lurching from decision to decision on what she should do about the ‘cash for anonymity’ situation at Beau Street and about Rowan and Shali. She’d heard from Natalie that the partners had decided to investigate the venue’s complaint about the summer party and had asked anyone with information to come and talk to them, which of course she hadn’t. Harry had even noticed how uptight she was and had kept asking what was wrong. She’d debated whether he really wanted to know or whether he just wanted her to cheer up as it was spoiling his social life. Somehow she feared it was the latter.

  Rachel was glad to be getting away, even if it was a weekend of report writing and changing nappies. She’d have plenty of time to think.

  She’d arranged with her mum to be home before Rowan and Laura got there so they could get organised. Rowan and Laura were driving down to Bath, dropping off Naomi and then heading on to a country house hotel about forty miles away.