Mistakes, Fried Chicken and Unlucky Mermen

by Rochelle Pearson

  I don’t appear sane. Shifty, suspicious, you know? Crazy eyed.

  A woman who’s internally freaking out that her best friend is being held by a two-foot cretin, and can’t call upon either of her badass friends that include a fairy hybrid, lion, and vampire to save the day because she hasn’t a clue to set things straight and now has to rely on a hot, waaay out of her league dragon for whom she’s expressed great affection for his dick in permanent marker.

  Yeah.

  I’m totally right as rain.

  At the sidewalk, waiting, the inner turmoil overflows when said dragon’s Lamborghini slows, coming to a stop out of traffic.

  “Get in, Cheeks.” He smirks. Of course, I’d get a new nickname out of my recent behavior.

  “About that.” I relay a full explanation about slowly coming to the conclusion Viper Spit had taken control of my being last night. I refrain from revealing who I had woken up beside or suspect I’d done the nasty dance with no pants with that who. Skipping over that, I tell him about drinking a memory potion to regain the events of the night hours, though I still wait for gaps to be pieced. Adrian didn’t hold back snorts and chuckles and a wide ass grin when I got to finding out what I had etched on my bum.

  “That stupid spit drink is to blame, I swear!”

  “Well, yeah. That shit will make you do crazy things, darling.” He chuckles, giving me a knowing look. Wouldn’t be the first time I swallowed a liquid that made me do something horribly wrong. Like getting drunk in the presence of a dragon and falling unconscious face first on his dick.

  For now I should just drink water.

  And quit thinking about his wanker.

  “Before you mooned me and my colleagues, you left the pot of gold with the ogre behind Chambers, telling him to give it to me,” Adrian softly explains and points to the backseat. There, the pot of gold doubloons sits with a seatbelt on. I’m grateful he doesn’t laugh anymore when he was talking. He’s nonchalant and cool about it. Here he is, mature and polished sitting next to Ms. Hick who should be arrested for indecent exposure. The realization saddens me, bringing the image of the unknown women to the forefront. They’ve got class and all I do is show my ass. I shake it off—I am, what I am—and continue talking.

  “I strongly believe Sammy Three Fingers has Lucas all because the little creep is a sore loser.”

  “Ah, yes. That isn’t news. I stay away from what he’s dealing—mostly, everyone does. I haven’t heard he’s done anything insanely gruesome. Just his enormous ego jammed pack into his teeny tiny body likes to push people around when he doesn’t get his way. I’m sure giving back the gold will ensure Lucas’s safety.” Adrian cants his gorgeous auburn head.

  “Hopefully.” I groan, using the heels of palms, I rub my eyeballs. A light touch upon my thigh instantly soothes me.

  “Kokoa, I’ll help you.”

  My hands drop to stare at him. The snug interior seems even smaller. His features were unimaginable. Clear, alabaster skin over a sharp, square jawline. Killer cheekbones. Perfect soft lips that I had the pleasure of kissing. And my favorite—copper eyes that if you stare deep enough, his pupils briefly turn to slits—a sign his inner dragon watches too.

  “I appreciate this so much,” I say breathy.

  He cocks a side smile, revealing a thick fang. “Of course, darling.” He leans close and brushes those beautiful lips across my cheek. “I knew having you in my life would be interesting... Cheeks.”

  Chapter Nine

  Before we took off, we needed to know where to go. The dragon set his connection using skills loose, and eventually many pings on Sammy, one a message from a witness having spotted Sammy and his goons near The Rabid Sombrero.

  I should’ve suggested we go there first since it dawned that’s where the game took place. Nevertheless, the Lamborghini burned rubber. I couldn’t keep still in my seat. As we went on down the main road, the taco joint building coming into view, my passenger door was cracked open and I was ready to jump out.

  “Hold it,” Adrian says. “We’ll approach this efficiently. We don’t want any more trouble—Kokoa, look at me.”

  I do, falling into my seat.

  “Do you understand?” he presses, meaning serious business.

  I nod. “Yes, yes, yes, come on.” I’m trusting what he said about Sammy just being a bully. Yet, all I want is for Lucas to walk away, not a shaggy hair out of place. Adrian slowly cruises along the empty drive thru wall. The parking lot is deserted.

  Except for a lime green SUV and gold rims.

  Damn, someone find me a pair of sunglasses. Preferably ones that deflect tackiness.

  In front of the bumper, stand two hulking men with familiar gorilla faces. I spot Sammy instantly as he perfectly matches his pimped-out ride.

  The little man dressed in green with gold shoes jumps up and down like a flea on top the chest of a man screaming his head off.

  Ah, good. Lucas is clearly alive.

  Adrian curses. “Alright, you grab the gold and I’ll do all the talkin’—” Whatever he says is unheard as I kick my door open, the loud sound causing Sammy and his goons to glance over and see a very pissed off she-wolf with her hands on her hips.

  “LET MY FRIEND GO OR I’LL START BITING HEADS OFF!”

  “Kokoa!” Adrian scrambles out. Sammy’s bloodshot eyes go wide seeing the dragon who quickly retrieves the pot.

  “LOOK! WE GOT YOUR STUPID GOLD!” I yell across the lot. Lucas remains on the ground, spread eagle, with Sammy standing on his torso.

  “It’s broad daylight and no cops have been called?” I whisper to Adrian.

  “And tell them you and your friend were part of an illegal poker game?”

  “Oh, who asked you.” I stomp over to Sam who grinds his boot into Lucas.

  “No more moving!” Sammy orders then snaps his fingers... that are on his good hand. Sammy’s face is marred and practicality engulfed by unruly, frizzy red hair and a horrid hooked nose.

  Though it’s his squeaky SpongeBob SquarePants voice that ruins the tough man look.

  Goon #1 steps forward.

  “Your money is here, now beat it,” I growl. Adrian places the pot on the halfway mark between. Goon #1 takes it and turns to the SUV. Sammy caresses his beard with the three-fingered hand.

  “It looks lighter.” He smirks.

  “Nuh uh! All of it’s accounted for,” I tell him, though I’m not sure. Adrian and I exchange a glance. He nods but his eyes aren’t sure.

  “Lucas, are you okay?” I ask my friend. Before he can answer, Sammy crouches and places his three fingers on Lucas’s mouth which cause the merman to freak the fuck out.

  “Shut up!” the leprechaun yells before straightening. “I demand interest!”

  The nerve—I charge for the slimy creep, baring my fangs. I make it close to the now scared mobster when Adrian grabs me around the waist.

  “You want interest? Huh?” I screech, balling a fist. “I’ll show you interest!” He’ll learn today I’m not the one to mess with. Even though intoxicating myself started all of this. His goons make to advance until Adrian hisses and releases smoke from his nose. The gorilla henchmen make a smart hasty escape into the SUV, leaving Sammy spewing curses in Irish. I guess they’ll be off the payroll come sundown.

  Adrian addresses him in a quiet voice, not faltering as I still wiggle in his arms.

  “I suggest you take your leave before she manages to get free... or I let her loose.”

  Sammy frowns like a kid having his play time cut short.

  Then laughs.

  “Fine! But stay away from me from now on or I won’t go easy on your friend next time.” The little man jumps off of Lucas who is immediately up and runs behind Adrian. The leprechaun scurries to the car.

  But then stops to grin at me.

  “But then again...” He goes on stroking his matted hair. “I like you, tough wolf. I had my eye on you last night...”

  Ick.

  Adrian snarls. Samm
y continues, ignoring him.

  “There’s an open position in my personal security if you’d like.” A dirty gold tooth winks.

  What? He’s seriously offering me a job?

  “The pay is fifteen thousand every other week,” he tells me. Adrian scoffs behind me, ready to leave. Am I really listening to this absurdity?

  Fifteen thousand is a lot...

  Sammy claps and the backseat door is opened. A small set of stairs tumbles out. “To get the job, all you have to do to get the position, is shave the merman. Make him bald.”

  He points three fingers at Lucas.

  Ready to say no, I mistakenly, hesitate.

  Lucas catches it. “KOKOA! WHAT THE HELL?!” he yells.

  “I wasn’t going to say yes!” but I did pause.

  Sam shrugs. “Suit yourself.” The stairs carry his small frame into the car. And he and his goons speed off.

  We wait several beats, then all exhale, Adrian sets me in my feet. My shoulders drop—whew. A shamrock bullet successfully dodged. Lucas raises his hand for a high five. I go for it, laughing at my goofy friend.

  “Alright, I’m not dead... or worse.” He smoothes his golden hair, implying losing his surfer-guy locks is way more devastating than death. Really, I wasn’t going to take Sam The Short Man’s offer.

  Really.

  No siree...

  Thankfully, Lucas’s attention span is that of a ladybug and shrugs.

  “Whatever. I’m too pumped over not being offed by a mobster to give a shit about anything else.” He smiles wide.

  Great. He’s gonna milk this to the damn moon and to every living and undead soul. “Up top again, bestie!” I catch Adrian smiling when Lucas and I slap palms once more.

  The second our skin connects again—Lucas’s face goes blank and I’m suddenly sucked into a different time. Appearing in an unlocked memory, I no longer stand in the parking lot.

  I kick open the door to the cabin. Lucas bursts out laughing, our arms wrapped around each other’s waists. We enter, sloppily, tripping over the threshold.

  “Honey, we’re hoooome!” he yells making me giggle uncontrollably.

  “Ssssh.” I press my fingers to his lips. “There’s no honey here... or is there?” All of sudden, scared someone may be in the cabin, I crouch with karate hands at the ready.

  “There’s no one here.” He snorts, dragging me into the kitchen. Gods, it’s a mess in here. Many empty bottles cover surfaces.

  “We did this.” I smile, proudly.

  “Hell yeah, we did!” He grabs my waist and deposits me on the counter. My ass knocks off a sad, empty tequila bottle. “Think you can handle the last of this?” Lucas asks, waving the bottle of Viper Spit. Literally, only a spit amount is left.

  “Give it to me.” I pull him by the collar, to nestle his body between my legs.

  “Say that, again.” He grins, watching the tongue I let out to lick my bottom lip.

  “Give. It. To. Me.” Teasingly, I bare my fangs. I swear, I’m soaring in the heavens. And you know what? That hell in a bottle did this to me and I want more, dammit!

  “Down the hatch it goes!” Lucas tilts my chin towards the ceiling and pouring the liquid hell down my awaiting throat. My eyelids squeeze shut. Holy goddess in a donut box, can this be any better?

  Well...

  Opening my eyes, I direct them at a pair of aquamarine irises that belong to a very handsome merman. So, what his face is kinda blurry? It’s his body I want.

  “I didn’t get to have a final sip,” he whispers, moving that fuzzy face closer.

  “I’ll let you have a taste.”

  “Damn, you’re the best.” He dives fingers in my hair, lips slanted above and close to mine.

  “What are friends for?” I shrug and jerk up to kiss him wildly. Not the best kiss being it involved a lot of unintentional biting and not to mention, he went at my mouth at a sloppy pace, his lips made out with my nose at one point.

  Maybe if we’re in bed, things will get better.

  I take him to mine, we quickly strip away clothes. Should I break these continuations of clumsy kisses to take a gander at his dick?

  Nah, he already has us under the covers and I can feel his joyful manhood pressed to my stomach. It feels long and sorta thick. Hooray for me!

  “Kokoa,” he groans into my neck. I sigh.

  He exhales, inhales breathing my skin in.

  Then he goes limp.

  “Huh?” I push him up, his head rolls like a dummy’s.

  His eyes are closed. A snore vibrates his lips.

  Hell, I’m sure deep down I'm pissed he’d just fallen asleep but I’m too tired. After shoving him to the side of the bed, I snuggle under the covers and fall asleep.

  Back in the present, we stumble several feet away. Adrian glances at us, back and forth, puzzled. Lucas grabs his head, mouth in a giant O.

  ”We?”

  “No!” I beam. My goddess, the last and the heaviest of weights is removed off my shoulders.

  “We didn’t!” Lucas shouts. “I FUCKING FELL ASLEEP! YESSSSSS!”

  Adrian just looks even more confused. “I don’t want to know. Let’s get out of here, please.”

  We hop in Adrian’s sweet ride; it’s pointed to Mystique Beach where Lucas soon gets offloaded in buck-wild celebration.

  Then it’s just the dragon and I heading for my cabin. The under half hour ride is quiet. I’m finally taking gulps of renewed breaths and expelling stress-free gusts. Holy hell in a mind-slapped tornado, it feels good to not have slept with my best friend. Weird, right?

  I don’t imagine what the fallout would’ve been like. No point in entertaining the “What ifs.” It’s over.

  “Here we are.” Adrian stops the car, though not putting it in park.

  This is where we part ways.

  He smiles.

  For now...

  “Thanks, um, you know—for everything,” I say, sighing once more and returning the smile. He reaches over and bushes soft fingertips across my cheek.

  “Of course. Do not hesitate to call me again if you’re in a... bind, next time. I have a feeling there might be more.” He clasps the base of my neck. It’s a gentle grasp and I immediately sag.

  “Yeah, I’m not even going to deny that, Psycho Lizard.” I wink.

  “Kokoa.” Adrian cracks a grin and crooks a finger on the hand that doesn’t have me in a hold. His glimmering eyes have me captured too. “Come here, darling.”

  I oblige while letting him pull me forward.

  We meet in the center, above the consol. His lips touch mine just once and begin retreating, infuriating my she-wolf.

  “Nuh uh. My turn.” I narrow my gaze, roughly yanking his collar. We try that sorry excuse of a kiss again.

  “Dangerous, you are.” He growls an inch from my face. “I like it.” A twitch of his sexy grin, he lets me go. Reluctantly. Movements on slo-mo, his darkening, desired eyes grow intense.

  “Run,” he whispers.

  I scramble. Body zinging in arousal, I ignore it and heed the warning in his tone, nearly falling on my face on the gravel ground.

  “Oh, and Kokoa?” he calls through the passenger window.

  “Yeah?”

  “Perchance... is my name still on your ass?”

  Instead of answering I flip him off, causing loud laughter to erupt from the dragon.

  Damn that lizard.

  Chapter Ten

  Out of the shower, I wrap a fluffy towel around me. It was when I was detangling my hair, I heard the back screen door open and close.

  I put the comb down and walk out to the hallway and there Gavin is.

  “Hey,” I greet, meekly. In the blink of an eye, he appears a foot away from me.

  Looking down at the floor. The hood of his leather jacket conceals some of his face. I glance at the back porch, where he’d just come in. I heave a heavy sigh. “Listen, obviously we have some things to discuss. Why don’t... you...” Words disappearing. My eyes
cast downwards taking in his current state...

  Of hot mess.

  His jeans are dirty and ripped. Pale bare feet, just as muddied. More streaks of forest debris spot the wide strip of chest and abs.

  Okaaaaaaaaay. Rolling in the dirt and showing up at other people’s homes is a thing now?

  If so, how come it wasn’t when I was doing it years ago?

  “Uh, hello?” I cant sideways to catch his eyes. No need, he scares the shit outta me by snapping his head up.

  I gasp at the sight of him.

  Ruby eyes now completely black. Not a centimeter of white showing. Purple veins protrude in his contoured cheekbones. Like branches, they reach up his pale temples and across his forehead. I hang on to the towel with shaky and clammy hands. Wha—? Fangs peek from up underneath his lip. I freeze, and as if the world around me does too, my heart beats loud in my ears—watching the needlepoints grow longer, touching the edge of his bottom lip.

  Quick footnote, y’all: I’ve never seen Gavin like this.

  Though I know vampires will get to be like this upon not feeding for quite some time.

  “Gav, you okay?” I frown, stepping forward, becoming confused—has he missed feedings while he was away?

  Not a second passed, I was suddenly shoved against the wall, being pinned by the solid weight of his whole body. My eyes bulge into his darkened abyss, unwavering glare.

  He clamps a hand over my throat.

  “What... the... hell?” I choke out. Clawing and wiggling free is useless. For the first time since meeting Gavin and being with him, actual fear cripples me. No, this isn’t my Gavin.

  He zeroed in on my pulse. I’m shocked he let his hunger run rampant, getting the best of him.

  Then it struck. He’s looking dead at his next feeding.

  Me.

  Oh, hell to the motherfucking no. I dealt with too much fuckery today.

  I kick him hard, nearly snapping my own damn foot. He flinches.

  I snarl then flat out roar, feeling my skin spark in the midst of a shift coming on. I roughly push him. The towel long ago dropped at the start of the struggle. I manage to get space between us. Enough to throw a damn good right hook at his jaw. He staggered, but he recovers quickly and comes at me again. We collapse, him on top. I was in my half-form—limbs stretched and muscular. A tail sprouts from the base of my spine. Face contorted into a wolf’s. I thrash under him, snapping my jaws violently to keep him from getting any closer. Gavin had my wrist locked in a hold on the floor, my claws, long, black and sharp dug into his skin. He howls in pain, searing my heart. I don’t want to kill him. I’m not capable of that nor could I push myself to doing that.