The Adventures of Rustle and Eddy

by Joseph R. Lallo

  “You sound like you very much like this person.”

  “She is divine! She is the sun and moon! And she gave me a very important task.”

  “She did? Was she like Stuartia?”

  Rustle recoiled, drifting out into the open again.

  “Do not speak that retched name! Stuartia is the enemy!” the fairy said.

  “She is? She seemed nice.”

  “She is the enemy of the wonderful Merantia and thus she is the enemy of all.”

  Something massive shifted nearby, causing a rumble and a rush of water.

  “What was that!?” Rustle yelped.

  “I do not know. We heard sounds, that is why we came here. But once we got here, just chains and pillars and walls.”

  “You can understand that whistling and squealing,” Mab said.

  “What did he say?” Rustle said.

  Eddy looked back and forth between them.

  “I think maybe my spell for knowing what people are saying works only for me. That is fine. I will explain what one says to the other. First, as I said, Mab is not ‘he.’ Mab is a dwarfmaid, Rustle.”

  “Just a dwarf!” Mab snapped.

  “Sorry. Just a dwarf.”

  “So it is a male?” Rustle said.

  “No. But the maids are not maids. They are just dwarf. Not different.”

  “But it has a beard.”

  “Dwarfmaids have beards.”

  “Just dwarfs!” Mab growled.

  “Sorry. Just dwarfs have beards,” Eddy said.

  “So dwarfmaids don’t have beards?”

  “They do, but they are not… They are, but…” Eddy paused. “I need more words to say this, I think.”

  Rustle shook his head. “It doesn’t matter. There is more I need to tell you. Eddy, remember the story that the vile Stuartia told us? And the writing that mentioned the thieves?”

  “I do! It seems so long ago, but it was not very long at all.”

  “I found the thieves. I didn’t mean to, but I woke them up! Well, I woke one up. But it woke up the rest!”

  “Good!”

  “No, Eddy, not good. They are terrible.”

  “Very good, then. A quest ends when something terrible is defeated. Are they very big? Are they scary?”

  “Very big. Bigger than me or you. Maybe bigger than the mechanical thing there.”

  “And how many.”

  “A thousand, I think.”

  “… That is very many.”

  “And it is worse! The tunnel that you started filling with water when you said those magic words? It was full of air for a reason. The thieves stop where the water stops. If the cave floods all the way, they’ll be able to get to the rest of the sea! It will be that big battle that Stuartia talked about all over again!”

  “But there was a very big thing, the Great Ancient, that was a part of that fight. We did not find that, so it is not the same fight. But it does not matter. We will fight them! You got here from there. Lead the way to the battle!”

  “It isn’t so simple as that. I got here squeezing through tiny cracks and fissures in the stone. Some of them were very long, little tubes that I could barely fit through.”

  “I’m still waiting for a translation of all this noise,” Mab rumbled.

  “Rustle says he can’t show us the way out because it is through holes too small for us.” Eddy turned back to Rustle. “But Borgle is very good at digging. We were going to dig out, but then we came here looking for a fight that wasn’t here.” The Merman furrowed his brow. “This bubble is annoying me. I will do the water-for-air for you again.”

  Eddy pinched Rustle’s ankles lightly between his claws, carefully pronounced the words to the spell, and yanked the little fairy down out of the bubble. Rustle took a few startled breaths, then gathered his wits and let the bubble drift upward into the darkness. From the look on his face, Rustle was getting ready to give Eddy an earful about doing things like that without proper warning, but something caused him to stop. He shivered and looked about.

  “Now that I’m touching the water… I don’t know… Can you feel that?”

  “What? A sort of bad feeling? An evil feeling?”

  “Yes,” he said warily.

  “We did!” Eddy crowed. “It is why we came to this place! Can you tell where the source of the bad is? I would rather fight one very big monster than a thousand monsters that are less very big.”

  “I don’t want to fight any monsters,” Mab said.

  Rustle continued. “It’s… all around us… But it feels… It feels familiar. It feels like Merantia’s magic… Glorious, resplendent Merantia…”

  His eyes lost the focus. They drifted upward, to follow the chain. Suddenly any semblance of fear, or even intelligence, left his expression. He may as well have been in a trance, half swimming, half flying along the chain.

  “I don’t like the look on your little friend’s face,” Mab said.

  “I do not like it either. We should follow him.”

  “He’s tiny. Just grab him, stow him someplace, and let’s find a way to get out of here.”

  “Rustle doesn’t like to be in bags. He is afraid of small spaces.”

  “More afraid of them than all-encompassing auras of evil and foreboding?”

  “Maybe? We will ask him when he is not so distracted. Until then, let us follow!”

  #

  The mesmerized fairy drifted up and up, eyes always set upon an indistinct point in the distance. They reached where the chain came to one of the narrower central columns, then continued along the column. Two more chains came and went, each attached to the column with stout metal bands. As they traveled, the column became stouter. Eventually it angled more precisely toward the center of the chamber, and some time later, it met with the other columns and combined into a massive, armor-plated shape.

  “I have a bad feeling about this…” Mab said.

  “The same bad feeling as before, or a new bad feeling?” Eddy asked. “My bad feeling is the same. The big bad one. The evil one. But also, I am confused. Why big columns with chains. Then a bigger one, but no chains?”

  Rustle was moving more quickly now. Eddy and Borgle flicked their tails to keep up, the merman wincing through the pain. They passed two vast struts jutting out of one side of the armored shape, then watched as the shape began to narrow again. A more complex mass at the top came into view. It was a narrow fissure running along a blunt-ended protrusion. Above the fissure they found a bulge. They rose above even that, finally reaching an open chamber above the huge thing. From above, they could see that there were three bulges total, one on each side, and one centered on the top between them. There Rustle stopped, eyes set upon the central bulge.

  “Rustle? Did you come here for a reason?” Eddy asked.

  “I don’t think your friend will be talking any time soon,” Mab said.

  “It does not seem so…” Eddy scratched his head. “This seems familiar. It is hard to picture, though.”

  He swam closer to the rocky surface of the thing and scraped out shapes with his claw on the surface just ahead of the bulge.

  “It had lots of long bits down here… and then the fat bit in the middle. Then there were those two struts.”

  “Put two on the other side as well. The thing looks symmetric to me,” Mab said.

  “Yes, yes. Two struts here too. And then pinched down, and then this… and these three bulges…”

  Eddy finished the rough sketch of what they’d seen.

  “That looks like… That looks like something I’ve seen… But what? Maybe I should go and see what the end of the struts look like? Or the bottoms of the columns?”

  “Oh, great creation… Oh, mighty being…” Rustle said, his voice toneless and distant.

  “What’s that, Rustle?” Eddy said.

  “I come from far, I bring with me a thread to connect you. I link you to your master, who lingers from beyond the veil…”

  “That is fancy talki
ng you are doing, Rustle.”

  “That doesn’t sound natural, what’s coming out of your friend,” Mab said. “Let’s get some distance away from him.”

  “He’s my friend. I will help him.”

  Rustle’s natural glow, normally a vague haze that hung around him in the murky water, began to waver and contort. It’s pale blue color flickered and threaded with a sharper blue. The deeper, darker color separated from the rest. It peeled away. One end threaded toward the armored shape below. The other darted off into the darkness, toward one wall.

  As soon as the discolored glow separated from his own, Rustle’s expression returned to a far more common frightened, confused state.

  “What? What is this? Where am I? What just happened?” Rustle said.

  “You were muttering something that sounded very magic,” Eddy said. “And that thread happened.”

  The bright blue filament of light was still curling and coiling in the air. One end of it had touched the shape beneath them. The other traced a path into a tunnel far below.

  Rustle shut his eyes and tried to concentrate.

  “It’s… it’s not my magic. And it’s going back the way I came. I can feel it. It’s strong. It’s going back to Merantia.”

  “Just Merantia?” Eddy said.

  “Yes, Merantia! Why?”

  “Usually you say nicer things around that name.”

  “Why would I say nice things about her? She is terrifying! A spirit, like Stuartia, but crueler. My head feels clearer now than it has since I met her. I think… I think she did something to me.” He turned to the filament of light. “I think that is her magic! I think it was riding along with me. And it is leading back to her.”

  “Would you care to explain what the little chatter box is on about?” Mab said.

  “The line of magic is from a dead mermaid who fought a dead mermaid we met and the other end is heading back to her.”

  “What happens when it gets to her?”

  A piercing hiss split the water and the blue line of magic danced and coiled as if alive. The whole chamber seemed to shudder and quake. Then the bulge below them split. The two halves slid aside to reveal a single, massive eye.

  Eddy stared in awe.

  “Still want to fight the one big thing instead of the thousand smaller ones?” Mab asked.

  Eddy grinned and took his pick in hand.

  “Don’t you dare!” Mab shouted.

  “Adventure!” the manic merman shouted.

  Chapter 19

  It takes a very special sort of person to be a true adventurer. Wisdom is important, to stay alive and to unravel the riddles on the path to glory. Bravery is important, so that the terrible threats along the path do not overcome those who face them. Strength is important, to defeat the foes that seek to bar the way. Luck is important, for sometimes wisdom and strength can fall short of the trials of a true adventure. But perhaps the most vital, and the most volatile, of those things that define a true adventurer is the precious spark of madness. The wise man is limited by his mind. A brave man is limited by his courage. A strong man is limited by his brawn. But a madman knows no limits.

  In a dark chamber, far below the sea, a terrible beast had dozed restlessly for longer than memory. It was a thing of the darkest nightmares, a thing of tentacle and claw, of tooth and scale. Were it on land, it would stand as tall as a mountain. Its three great eyes were each as large as boulders. Chains large enough to bind titans held it in its place, and yet with each stirring it shook the land and sea. It was an ungodly thing. A thing from a time before grace and beauty. It was the being known only as the Great Ancient. And when the foolish spirit who plucked it from its abyss finally managed to wake it once more, it was greeted by a true adventurer. His strength eclipsed his wisdom, and his bravery eclipsed his strength. But his madness, that eclipsed it all.

  “Eddy, you lunatic!” Mab cried as the merman darted toward the blinking eye.

  Eddy drove his pick into the smoldering eye before him. The twisted, abused bit of metal pierced the glassy surface. Eyelids like iron shutters snapped closed, scything through the pick as though it were straw. The beast threw its head back, striking Rustle, Eddy, Borgle and Mab like a landslide. They rushed backward through the water and struck the far wall. The hapless dwarf plummeted into the darkness below as the Great Ancient roared in pain and anger. The sound was like nothing any of them had ever heard, a grinding, reverberating, thundering wail that rattled their very bones.

  “Eddy, the dwarf!” Rustle called.

  His voice couldn’t overcome the rumble of the Great Ancient, but his terrified gleam caught Eddy’s eye as he blinked away the dizziness of the impact.

  “Mab!” he called. “Borgle, we have to catch her!”

  They streaked down, following the flailing form of the dwarf. As the angry roar ended, they could hear the distant sound of the dwarf language serving the task it very well may have been crafted to fulfill: angry, bellowed profanity.

  Eddy was the first to reach her, grabbing her arms and fighting to bring her to a stop.

  “How did you live this long, you great, empty-headed fish!?” she cried, gripping him tight.

  “This is my first adventure!” he said.

  “And do you want it to be your last? Let’s get out of here!” Mab said.

  “If you don’t want this to be your last adventure, Eddy, we need to get away from that thing!” Rustle said, in his own language.

  Eddy flashed a smile again.

  “Mab said the same just now. I think you two would like each other.”

  “Let’s just go!” both Rustle and Mab shouted.

  A claw lurched out of the darkness, but it reached the end of its massive chain before it could reach them. They backed against the wall, then slipped into an alcove beside the anchor of another enormous chain. The whole wall was rumbling and shaking around them.

  “We’ve found the source of the quakes. And you woke it up,” Mab said.

  “I didn’t wake it up! I stabbed it in the eye once it was already awake!” Eddy said.

  He leaned into the open and gazed up. The bound beast gazed down. All three eyes were open, and the one Eddy stabbed had a brilliant glowing point. The remains of the pick were incandescent with heat, boiling away with the intensity of the monster’s power.

  “It blinked my pick in half…” Eddy said. “That was a good pick…”

  “It was a terrible pick. You get me through this and I’ll show you a proper pick,” Mab said.

  The creature lashed its claw forward again. Again the chain stopped it, this time with a flash of golden energy. Though the chain held firm, a fault split the wall.

  “I don’t think this chamber is going to last much longer,” Eddy said.

  “We should get back to the tunnel that brought us here! We know it goes a fair distance away. That will give us the chance to figure out what to do.”

  “What did he say?” Rustle said.

  “She—Mab is a she—said we should go to the tunnel that brought us here to figure out what to do,” Eddy said.

  “Mab is very smart and we should listen to her.”

  “But the fight! The adventure!”

  “If you want to bash yourself against a mountain that is trying to kill you, you can do it on the inside of the tunnel. It’ll do you just as much good! Now lead the way!”

  “Right, right,” Eddy said. “We form a plan!”

  He darted out into the open.

  “You just wait, evil creature! We will defeat you!”

  A claw swept in his direction. Yet again it was stopped by the chain, but the rush of water it brought along with it threw him against the wall. He blinked his glowing eyes and shook his head, then darted downward, quick as his tail could propel him. Rustle grabbed hold of his hair and rode along with him. Borgle swam as quickly as it could and dragged itself along with its claws for some extra speed.

  “Not much farther,” Eddy said. “Just a bit farther. That’s
the tunnel there. We’ll just slip inside and—”

  The air filled with an unearthly squeal. Below them a murky rush of scalding hot water sprayed from within the tunnel ahead. A flow of black stone curled from within, growing and oozing with a band of glowing red.

  “Lava!” cried Mab. “But how! That wasn’t there before!”

  “The molten blood of the earth…” Eddy said. “The cleansing blood of the earth… Dua’s digger struck its target!”

  “What?” Rustle said. “Where are we going to go now?”

  They retreated from the tunnel, moving aside so that the rising hot water would not cook them alive. The rush of molten stone grew, the flow now nearly filling the tunnel. Other nearby tunnels below began to ooze with similar streams of blackening molten stone.

  “Where do we go? Where do we go!?” Rustle said.

  “We stay,” Eddy said, reaching for Dua’s chisel.

  “What can we do?” the fairy asked.

  He pointed. “That is the cleansing blood of the earth. That is the Great Ancient. Borgle, Dua, the other diggers, this chamber, the others we found. They all existed for this moment. To defeat the Great Ancient who nearly ruined the sea. The Great Ancient who has shaken the sea floor in its sleep and threatened to knock my home to the ground time and time again. That molten stuff will fill this chamber. It will destroy the Ancient.”

  One of the shifting pillars, which they now knew to be one of the tentacles of the ancient, recoiled as the flow of stone struck it. The shifting finally pulled one of the damaged bars entirely away from the wall. Eddy’s hand tightened around the grip of the chisel.

  “But it will only work if the Ancient doesn’t escape!”

  Rustle looked all about them. Fear seized his features, but slowly something else crept in. It wasn’t bravery precisely. But whatever it was, it was replacing the fear.

  “The thieves,” he said. “What about the thieves? They are far enough away, who knows how far the stone will flow?”

  “Yes… Yes… They need to be destroyed as well,” Eddy said. “Mab! Do you remember the way Rustle came from?”

  “Yes! We can’t escape that way because he got there though little passages.”