Something Just Like This

by Jennifer Probst

  Jonathan choked on a piece of turkey. He gulped some water and faced his daughter in shock. “You never told me that! Mia and I never had a relationship!”

  Ethan shrugged. “I thought you two had a thing, also. Now I realize it’s ridiculous. You’d kill one another.”

  “Chloe, I wish you would have asked me,” Jonathan said.

  His daughter gave him a gentle smile. “We had too many issues back then, Dad. Winning the election was priority, and I was pissed at the world. But my point was watching how far we’ve all come. Now, the table is double the size.” She beamed, looking at the couples gathered around. “I think it’s really cool. And now Alyssa is part of us.”

  Mia raised her glass of sparkling apple cider, her eyes gleaming with a bit of wetness. “Let’s have a toast to that. To love, in all ways, for all of our days.”

  Ethan rested his hand on her belly and kissed her cheek. “I’ll toast to that.”

  They clinked glasses, and Jonathan caught Alyssa’s gaze, full of longing and regret, and a vulnerability that shredded his insides. She deserved all of it. A big, crazy family who loved her exactly as she was. A man to show her every day that she was special and beautiful and…everything.

  Patrick cleared his throat. “Can we let the animals in now? Poor Charlie’s been at Mia’s with that awful chicken, and I promised him some turkey.”

  Ophelia sighed. “You know the rules are I never let animals in the house because of guests, but we’re clear till Sunday, so I have a few days to do some deep cleaning.”

  “Is that a yes?” Harper asked hopefully.

  “That’s a yes. Go get the rest of your loved ones.”

  Patrick and Harper jumped up with Chloe and rushed out.

  “Do you have any pets, Alyssa?” Ophelia asked with a smile.

  “Not yet. But this weekend convinced me to get a cat. I’ll ask Chloe for help. My hours are insane, so I need to be careful.”

  “That’s smart, too many people get a puppy, then realize no one will be there all day. Did you have fun horseback riding?”

  Her face lit up. “Yes, it was amazing. I never felt so free before. And being with the horses made me realize how special they are. It’s like the only thing they want from you is to be loved—no rules, limits, or conditions. Wouldn’t it be beautiful to be that brave? To love someone like that?”

  A hush fell over the table. Jonathan fisted his hands, desperate to reach over and pull her into his arms. Bury his lips in her hair and show her how badly he wanted to give her that type of love.

  Suddenly, he caught Mia’s gaze across the table. She cocked her head, studying him with narrowed eyes.

  She knew.

  But he couldn’t hide his emotions here, and right now, he didn’t have to. Mia was a master at keeping secrets and respecting privacy. It was a miracle she hadn’t figured it out before.

  Ophelia sighed. “That’s how everyone should be loved, at least once. But the way you expressed it was perfect. Maybe Kyle can use you for inspiration.”

  Kyle winked. “Got all the inspiration I need right here, baby,” he said, giving her a kiss.

  Ethan made gagging noises.

  They laughed, and in minutes, the house exploded with a variety of canines, felines, fowl, and a goat. There were barks, and chicken shrieks, and bleats, and meows, as small plates of turkey were dispersed. Afterward, Alyssa and Chloe got on the floor and rubbed Charlie’s belly, fussed over Figaro the beautiful black and white cat, and played with Captain Hoof.

  “Dish duty,” Kyle called out, rocking back and forth on his heels with glee. “Who’s up?”

  “I’ll do it,” Mia said, beginning to rise.

  Ethan eased her back down. “Not you, sweetheart. Just relax.”

  Jonathan noticed her usual argument that pregnancy limited none of her skills seemed to disappear for the occasion. She made a grateful kissing sound and settled down with a triumphant expression.

  Damn, she was good.

  Patrick sighed with fake sorrow. “Really sorry, but my hands have been experiencing bad arthritis now. It’d be real painful for me. Must’ve been all those years of crackin’ my knuckles.”

  “Oh, that’s just a myth,” Alyssa interrupted. “Cracking knuckles doesn’t cause arthritis. The sound is simply gas bubbles bursting.”

  Patrick shot her a look. “Well, I still got bad arthritis and can’t do dishes.” Alyssa seemed to realize the high stakes of this game and quickly snapped her jaw shut. He tried not to laugh.

  Kyle raised a brow. “Good one, Dad. Next?”

  Aidan raised his hand. “I was training this new horse, and the bastard threw me. Now my back’s a bit messed up.”

  Ethan snorted. “You’re a champion trainer, and a colt threw you?”

  “Yeah, it was terrible. Harper was terrified for me, weren’t you, love?”

  “Sure, Irish. Terrified.”

  Kyle nodded. “Not bad. Ethan?”

  “Remember how I got shot a few years back? Well, you know how when the cold weather comes in, my knee hurts like a son of a bitch? I can barely stand. Don’t think dishes would be a good idea.”

  Ophelia groaned and rolled her eyes. “Unbelievable. Not one of you feels guilty about sticking Jonathan with all those dishes, huh?”

  He realized then that the guys didn’t think he could bring it. The sheen of success was already carved on their faces, but they didn’t know a man didn’t get to be mayor without playing a few games of hardball. He swiped his hands together and spoke.

  “Sorry, gentlemen, but I’ll have to pass on dishes. I have a call with the president in about ten minutes.”

  Silence descended.

  Alyssa’s eyes sparkled with mirth, and Mia clamped her lips together as if trying desperately not to laugh.

  The four men at the table stared at him with shock and begrudging respect.

  Kyle inclined his head. “You win, Mr. Mayor. Gentlemen, the Brillo pads are under the sink with the extra sponges. Good luck. We’re going to enjoy an after-dinner drink on the porch.”

  Kyle took his wife’s hand and led her away from the mess of piles, leftovers, soiled pots and pans, and endless crystal glasses littered across the table.

  Ethan shot him a glare. “You’re good, dude,” he muttered, then strode into the kitchen with a bit of a temper. Patrick cursed and then slowly followed, with Aidan trailing on his heels.

  Mia winked. “And that’s why you’re going to be governor of New York.”

  Alyssa laughed.

  It was the sweetest sound he’d ever heard.

  And in that moment, Jonathan realized this was one of the best Thanksgivings he’d ever had.

  * * * *

  Alyssa sat outside in a comfortable rocker. The wraparound porch boasted various chairs, afghans, and a portable heater to keep guests warm on colder nights. After the kitchen had been cleaned, they feasted on dessert and settled down to watch Moana. She’s seen it many times over the years with her parents—any type of movie was acceptable in their house—but watching it with a huge family, snuggled next to Jonathan and Chloe, had been magic.

  She’d watched as he tried to pick a place across the room, but Chloe had dragged him over, pushing Alyssa right next to him on the giant sectional couch. Most of the movie, she desperately tried not to focus on the hard length of his leg pressed against hers, or his shoulder an inch away, or his carved profile flickering in shadow. His ocean scent teased her nostrils, and her tummy gave maddening flutters every time he turned to her and gave that sexy half-smile.

  She was beginning to break apart piece by piece.

  At the end, Chloe sang the song You’re Welcome in her father’s ear, and Alyssa watched them play-fight and giggle before settling into a long chat by the fireplace. She’d sought some alone time outside, giving them privacy.

  The night was still, and she wrapped her arms around her knees as she stared into the darkness, enjoying the various sounds of the night creatures coming
alive to play. The screen door shut, and Mia sank down into the rocking chair next to her.

  “I love seeing them like that together,” Mia commented. “He’s changed a lot. Both of them have.”

  There were too many things she could say, and all would give away her heart. So she just nodded. “It’s nice to see a close father/daughter relationship. He’s sweet.”

  Mia seemed to still, cranking her head around to stare. “What did you say?”

  “Jonathan. He’s sweet.”

  Alyssa fought a blush at the woman’s searing gaze, as if her inner secrets and soul had been dragged out and revealed. “Jonathan Lake is not sweet. He’s stubborn, loyal, and a visionary. He’s an amazing, supportive father. He’s one of the best businessmen I’ve met. But girlfriend, he’s not sweet.”

  Alyssa blinked, trying to extract herself from this without giving herself away. “Of course you’re right. Not sure where that adjective sprang from.”

  Mia sighed. “Oh, babe, I think you know. You poor thing. You’re in love with him.”

  Cheeks burning, cursing herself for acting juvenile when she barely broke a sweat in a room full of high-powered men barking at each other like the world depended on their next decision, she forced a laugh. “Don’t be ridiculous. I’ve worked with the mayor for almost three years now. Sometimes people get the wrong idea.”

  Mia snorted. “I should have known something was going on. I’ve never seen Jonathan so happy. At first, I thought it was the run for governor, or being in a great place with Chloe, but I sensed something bigger. I can’t believe I missed it during all those meetings we spent together. The way he looks at you when he thinks no one’s watching. The way he smiles with his whole being when you hang with Chloe. He finally found the right woman after all this time. He found you.”

  “I’m not the right woman,” she said automatically. “I’m not his type.”

  “You are exactly his type. Jonathan bores way too easily. With you, he’ll be lucky if he ever knows what will happen next.”

  Enough. She couldn’t stand another person misjudging who she was and thinking Jonathan and she were a perfect fit. “Listen to me! I may be good at my job, but when I’m done, I want to be home. Alone with my books and music and TV. I don’t even have an animal, that’s how isolated I like to be. I hate people. I am not even close to being suited for that man.”

  “Why?” Mia asked curiously. “What type of man do you really think he is?”

  “He’s dynamic and opinionated and larger than life. He runs a city, and soon, he’ll run a state. He loves being around people, and at the top of his game. He’s an adventurer. After a month of living together, he’d realize how boring I really am.”

  Mia’s face gentled, and she reached out to grasp Alyssa’s hand. She startled at the intimate, supportive touch, not understanding what was about to happen. She’d rarely had many friends throughout her life. “Babe, I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize how scared you are. Boy, I don’t blame you. I fricking freaked out when Ethan and I were falling for each other, and we had a lot of obstacles to work on, but I need you to hear this and truly listen to me. I’ve known Jonathan for a long time, and I’ve never seen him look at a woman the way he looks at you. He’s at peace. He smiles. His energy is different. You’ve worked for him for a while, do you really think he doesn’t realize who you are? You’re using the image of him to protect yourself because then you won’t get hurt. Pretty typical stuff, right off the therapist’s couch.”

  Alyssa sifted through every word, trying to dig deep and see if there was any truth to it. “My main concern is his career, Mia. You know, you’re his publicist. He doesn’t need any scandal, and sex with his assistant constitutes a problem. The press will be all over it. I can’t let our relationship cost him the election.”

  Mia cocked her head and frowned. “He’s widowed, and it’s been five years. He’s allowed to date, even in the public eye. I think it may even boost his image. Women secretly worry he’s a big player behind the scenes.”

  Alyssa took off her glasses and rubbed her eyes. Frustration simmered. “I’m his executive assistant. I accompany him to all public functions. I run his office and calendar. I’m with him behind most closed-door meetings. With the #metoo movement in full swing, he could catch a lot of heat, and we can’t risk it.”

  Mia tapped her finger against her lip, considering. “I see your point, but it has nothing to do with #metoo because he never pressured you, discriminated against, or did things you didn’t want. You both chose, as grown adults, to dive into a relationship. Will it be easy? Hell, no. Can we make it work? Yes. Because I know how to spin everything. I have boots on the ground, contacts at all papers, and on social media sites. If we get ahead of it before there are any leaks, I can perform magic.” Her attitude should have been smug, but it was all kick-ass confidence. Alyssa’s respect for Mia went up a thousand notches. She loved a woman who knew she was good at her job and not afraid to tell the world. Too many women had learned along the way to soften their successes, explain things away, making it easy for the outside world to steal their power.

  No more. No woman should feel ashamed to own her talents. She saw the same fire in Chloe, an assurance that she could do anything with enough work and determination. It was special, and unfortunately, still too rare. But she was hopeful the next generation would follow the path through.

  “Unless something else is holding you back.” Mia peered into her face as if digging for the real truth. Then her golden eyes softened with sympathy Alyssa didn’t understand. “Oh, I get it. It’s not really about Jonathan or the election. It’s about you.”

  She gasped. “Excuse me? This has nothing to do with me, other than putting my career at risk, which I don’t want to lose.”

  “No, believe me, I know how difficult it’d be, but I’ve seen Jonathan fight for something he wants, and he’s fierce. Protective. He’ll do what needs to be done, and so will I. But this is about you not wanting to be in the spotlight. I don’t blame you, Alyssa. A political partner is a bitch to deal with, so it’s better if you realize you can’t handle it now before you break his heart.”

  Her jaw dropped. “Me, break his heart? I’m doing this to protect him because I care. I couldn’t live with myself if he lost the election because of a sex scandal with his office partner.”

  “It’s not about sex, it’s about love. A relationship. You’ll date in the public eye. We’ll make an announcement, control how we want the world to find out, and deal with some fallout. Mostly, I think it’ll be great for ratings. But you will have a hard time.” Her voice strengthened. “You need to believe in yourself and him and know you can stand together even when it’s tough. I’m crazy about you, Alyssa. I think you were meant to be with Jonathan, but maybe that’s just not a life you can handle.”

  The words were vicious, tearing at her like tiny, sharp jabs that drew blood. She caught her breath, but Mia kept her direct stare, and she realized she wasn’t trying to be mean. She was just telling the truth.

  Dear God, she was right.

  All this time, her real fear was being dragged out into the public eye and mocked. Just like she’d spent her entire life dealing with parents who poked and jabbed and tried to get her to be an actress when all she wanted to do was sit with her books. Pushed her into the spotlight in large groups of people, waiting for her to perform, whether it be conversation, a joke, or an interesting anecdote. All until she ventured deep inside herself where she couldn’t be reached or hurt. She’d sought out assistant positions her entire life, comfortable in the role, enjoying working behind the scenes to reach perfection. It was where she excelled. But this would mean stepping out into a whole different role.

  The mayor’s girlfriend.

  The realization slammed hard, throwing her into doubt. She’d been spinning excuses to keep Jonathan away, citing everything but her own secret fear.

  Could she handle a life in the public eye with this man?

&nbs
p; Or was it too high of a price to pay?

  “Oh, Alyssa, I’m sorry. I didn’t say that to hurt you. I think it’s good to be honest, and Jonathan deserves it. So do you. Can I help in any way?”

  Still bruised, Alyssa shook her head and forced a smile. “No. I’m not mad. You’re right. I just didn’t realize it.” She nibbled at her lip and slipped her glasses back on. “I have to think.”

  “Just remember, love doesn’t really add up nicely on a ledger. It’s messy and damn scary. It’s like jumping off a cliff, and you have a fifty/fifty shot of either dying or flying. Some risk the cliff over and over. Others figure their statistics are crappy, and they’re better off walking than flying.”

  The image stuck in her head in crystal-clear clarity, blinding her with the sudden knowledge of what she’d been doing. “Yes, that makes perfect sense.”

  Mia reached over and gave her a half-hug, her belly blocking most of the contact. “Once you decide if he’s worth it, don’t look back. Just leap. Trust me, it seems to work best that way. Harper and Ophelia would agree with me.”

  “Thanks, Mia. I’m going to head to my room for a bit. Take some time.”

  She left the porch, already sensing change in the air, and a big decision to make.

  To jump off the cliff or not.

  It was a question she needed to answer.

  Chapter Ten

  Jonathan followed the pathway toward the barns, letting the light of the moon guide his way. He’d tossed and turned for a while before giving up on sleep. It was impossible, knowing Alyssa was right next door. He imagined her naked, hair loose over the pillow, eyes sleepy without the protection of her glasses, arms reaching out for him.

  Yeah, after a cold shower, he’d decided to get some air. The inn was quiet, and he enjoyed the cover of darkness for both his body and heart, which ached with the knowledge that he’d never be able to have the only woman he wanted.

  Being surrounded by family and friends for the holiday reminded him his job was an important part of him, but not everything. He’d been neglecting the man inside, who now craved a partner to share the high and low moments of his life with.