Untamed Wolf

by Wade, Cara

  I hadn’t even set foot on the ground yet, and I didn’t want to go home. I already felt like this was exactly where I belonged.

  “Oh wow, this is lovely,” I said pleasantly, just trying to break the thick silence that clung to the air. “It’s really nice here, isn’t it?”

  James and Evan continued to ignore me, but thankfully Lorna gave me a really bright smile. In that moment I felt a tiny glimmer of hope, maybe it would be okay after all. Maybe I would be able to make a connection with at least one of these kids, even if I didn’t have to. It would be much easier if someone liked me.

  “Right, here we are,” Evan announced with a commanding tone as soon as the car pulled to a halt. “Let’s get going, come on.”

  Wow, it was hard to keep my emotions inside, this was incredible. I was trying to act cool, but I could feel a thrilling shudder racing through my body. It was crazy to see how the other half lived! This was like a page from a travel magazine, a villa basked in sunshine, complete with a tropical island feel and a pool. I had to be in Heaven, it was the only option.

  “James, Lorna, you already know where you are sleeping, go and unpack quickly, then maybe you could show Ali where the beach is.”

  Ooh, I liked the idea of getting out for the day, now that I was here my feet were itching to get outside.

  “Ali, would you like me to show you to your room?” The way he spoke to me so formally made me feel a little strange. It was almost quite sexy, which was not where I needed my brain to be going.

  “Oh yeah, thanks.” He took me to the biggest bedroom I’d ever seen, it was larger than my entire apartment. “Thank you, this is…” I started, but as I turned around Evan was already gone, lost in a cell phone conversation with what sounded like a business contact.

  Oh well, it didn’t matter, I could just push that sting to one side, it really didn’t matter. I had to get ready for the beach! There was a bikini in my suitcase that was begging to be worn. If Evan wanted to hang around being grumpy in a business suit, that was up to him. I was the one who right now had the best job ever!

  ***

  “You know, you’re very pretty,” Lorna babbled to me, really opening up now that she wasn’t connected to the Internet. The outside brought a very different side of her out. “It’s nice to have you here.”

  “Oh, thank you, I’m glad to be here.” As I stretched my body out across the hot sand, I wouldn’t have wanted to be anywhere else in the world. Max who? “Do you think your brother is all right?”

  James hadn’t yet said one word to me, but it was okay. He seemed to be enjoying himself, splashing in the ocean. Maybe he was just a quiet person. The last thing I wanted to do was push him. I just had to hope that he would let me in a little more when he felt ready.

  “Yeah, he’s fine. He just doesn’t like to talk to people much because they always leave him.”

  She said that with the brutal, calm honesty that children possessed, which sent her words spiking deeper into my heart. “What do you mean?”

  “Oh, well, our mom isn’t here anymore, and he thinks Meghan is going to go soon too.”

  “Wh…who’s Meghan?” For some reason I felt anxious that she was going to say her dad’s girlfriend. Why that would bother me, I wasn’t sure. Evan was a handsome rich man, why wouldn’t he have a girlfriend? What did it matter anyway, it wasn’t like I was going anywhere near him.

  It hadn’t escaped my notice that she’d mentioned her mom too, but that seemed like far too tricky a topic for me to be delving into. She wasn’t here, Evan was a single father, that was all I needed to know. If he ever wanted to tell me more then I would listen, but I wasn’t holding my breath for it. Evan seemed as closed off as his son.

  “Our nanny at home. She was supposed to come away with us, but she couldn’t. Now James thinks she’s going to leave us too. The nanny before her went as well.”

  “Oh right…” My words trailed off as I stared out towards the water. This was a complicated family situation, I could tell that there was a whole lot going on under the surface. Maybe I could use this month to actually make a difference, maybe I could help this family out. It wasn’t what I came to Hawaii for, but it would be good to use my skills and time in a positive way.

  If I came away from this experience having achieved something positive, then everything would be even better. That sense of achievement would totally override everything else that was going on inside of me. Positivity was exactly what I needed to continue driving forward in the right direction.

  “Well, shall we go and have a splash in the water?” I smiled, trying to change the subject. “Maybe James will join in, but if not, we can have some fun, right?”

  “Yes, fun!” She jumped up and down and screamed excitedly, which made me chuckle loudly. Lorna was a good kid, she was going to make it awesome.

  As we splashed and played about in the water, mostly without James but occasionally with, I felt like I was on top of the world. This was so much better than being at home, I would definitely be alright now that I was here.

  ***

  “Come on then, let’s go in. It’s time for bed now,” I chuckled as I slid the door to the villa open. “You guys must be exhausted.”

  “I don’t think I’ll ever sleep again!” Lorna squealed. “That was the best day ever.”

  “I know, but we can do it again tomorrow…” The sentence died in my throat as I spotted Evan sitting at the dining table, surrounded by paperwork and a laptop. He was still in his suit, but his tie had long been discarded and the top few buttons were undone. “Oh, I’m sorry, are we making too much noise?”

  “No, no, I’m almost done for the day.” He slumped back in his seat a bit and, for a split second, I could’ve sworn that I felt his eyes travelling up and down my body in an appreciative way. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up, and goose bumps ran up and down my arm, but he turned towards the kids before I could know for sure. “Have the kids eaten?”

  “Yeah, I used the daily budget to take them out for dinner, is that okay?” Was I supposed to get something for him too? Had I committed a serious faux pas? I hadn’t worked for a family before, only in nurseries, I wasn’t totally sure what the unspoken rules and regulations were.

  “Yeah, yeah, that’s fine,” he grinned happily, spiking relief inside of me. “Just wanted to check.” He glanced at his watch and turned to Lorna and James. “You two really do need to be in bed, you know?”

  The excitement totally deflated from the kids as their father talked to them. Their entire demeanor changed, which just proved to me what I already suspected, this family needed my help. At least I was here, and I had a few weeks to make a difference. I just needed to ensure that I used that time wisely.

  “Come on, I’ll take you up.”

  As I tucked the kids in, and bid them goodnight, my mind was all over the place. I wasn’t sure if I imagined Evan checking me out or not, and I really needed to know. It was risky, and I feared that it might unleash a whole load of issues that I wasn’t equipped to deal with, but I couldn’t seem to stop myself from wanting to know.

  I guess what with all I had been through recently, it was nice to feel attractive. I was pretty down on myself, I felt frumpy and boring – just as Taylor had suggested – and I really needed a boost.

  Surely if I just innocently walked back into the kitchen with my bikini on to grab something to drink, that would be okay, wouldn’t it? The fact that I even needed to ask that just proved that it really wasn’t a good plan, but it was too late. I wanted to be convinced, so I was. I shrugged off the shawl I had draped over my shoulders, and I slowly walked back in to where I knew Evan was still sitting, lit up by the glow of his computer screen.

  It really was a shame that he had to work so much while he was in such a beautiful place, but if he wasn’t then I wouldn’t have my job, so I couldn’t complain too much.

  “Can I get you anything?” I asked breezily as I brushed past him. “Would you like a drink
or anything?”

  “Actually, do you think that you could hand me a beer from the fridge?”

  As I handed it to him, our hands brushed and a powerful bolt of electricity raced through my entire body, bringing a flush to my cheeks. This made me feel like a school girl with a secret crush, one that gave me a secret thrill.

  “Did the kids go to sleep alright?” He smiled at me, revealing a very sexy set of dimples in his cheeks. I got the distinct impression that he didn’t smile too much, so it was kinda nice that he was doing it for me.

  “Yeah fine, I wore them out all day.”

  His eyes fell down to my breasts, and I felt a powerful surge of sexiness overcome me. He was looking at me like he wanted to devour me, and for someone who had never been looked at in that way before it was really nice. Max had never gone out of his way to make me feel attractive, I just assumed that he didn’t have it in him, so to have this man who was a million leagues above Max looking at me like that was delicious and intoxicating.

  “Well, that’s just great. Thank you for doing this. And thank you for coming on this trip with us all such last minute.”

  “Yeah, that’s fine.” He gave me a look, but there was no way that I was about to delve into the sad, sorry story of my life. Evan really didn’t need to hear about my childish break up with the boy I assumed I loved. It was too embarrassing for words. “I’m glad I came,” I finished a little lamely instead.

  "Me too, actually.” Oh God, there was that smile again. It was causing my heart to dance and dart all over my body. This wasn’t anything I could ever act on, I was still really aware of that, but I could keep it as a secret little thing just for myself. “And the kids seem to really like you, so that’s always good.”

  I nodded slowly, wondering if this was the moment to ask all the questions that were floating around inside my head, but before I got the chance he started talking again.

  “Maybe one of these days I should come to the beach with you,” he smirked playfully. “It looks like you all had a good time.”

  Oh God, I was falling in too deep. Everything was flapping excitedly now, if I wasn’t careful I would be kissing him in a heartbeat. The thought of him on the beach with us made me far too thrilled for words. Nervous too, of course, but mostly just super happy.

  “Yeah, sure, erm… I better go to bed.” I stood up quickly, needing some air before I said anything silly. This was too much, too intense, I could practically feel my brain shutting down. “But, erm, yeah I will see you in the morning.”

  As I walked off rapidly, I felt like I was flying higher than air. Much as it was a dangerous sensation, it was a good one too. As long as I was careful, everything would be alright.

  ***

  A weariness overcame my body after the second, long day of fun in Hawaii. I wasn’t used to all of this running around, but it was probably doing me a lot of good. I would be fit by the time I got home, tanned too, which were two more bonuses to me being here.

  “Did you all have fun today?” I jumped as Evan’s voice unexpectedly burst out from behind me as I rummaged in the fridge for something to eat, scaring the hell out of me. “I didn’t get to see the kids as you came in.”

  “Oh yeah,” I gasped a little, trying to catch my breath back. “Yeah, we had a great day.” I grabbed a yogurt and sat down. Evan did the same, but his body more fell, which suggested to me that he’d been drinking. “Is everything all right?”

  “Yeah, just a long, booze filled business meeting,” he waved his arm dismissively as he spoke. “You know how it is. Always the same. Once someone opens a bottle, there’s trouble ahead.”

  “Right…” Of course I had no idea, but there was no point in saying that. “Sure.”

  “How do you do it?” His expression changed, his voice became impassioned, he gave me a really curious look. “How do you get Lorna and James to like you?”

  “Erm…” this was a bit too far, I didn’t quite know what to say about that one. How was I supposed to answer such an awkward question? “Well, I don’t know, James is a little quiet with me still…”

  “They love you, I can tell. Why can’t they love me like that?”

  We were teetering into the territory where I wanted to find out more, but I wasn’t sure if this was the way I wanted to do it. I would’ve liked to do it more on my own terms. Still, it was too late for that now. We were down the rabbit hole, it was time to find out what I could. If I was going to help this family, then I needed to discover everything,

  “They do love you?” I tried, but the statement came out more like a question which didn’t help anything. In all honesty, I couldn’t totally tell how they felt about him.

  “No, I don’t think they do. They haven’t ever loved me. Before Phoebe died they didn’t even know me, and now they still don’t.”

  “Phoebe?” There was a definite shake in my voice now. I probably should shut this conversation down, but I wasn’t sure how.

  “Phoebe was my wife, the kid’s mom.” His head fell into his hands as a sadness overcame him. “And she did everything for them. I was always way too involved in the business to do anything. I thought that the best way for me to help my children was to provide for them. I wanted to give them the best life possible.”

  “Well, you’ve definitely done that.” I wanted to make him feel better, but I wasn’t sure that it totally came across right.

  “Then she got sick. Cancer.”

  My heart stopped dead in my chest, I wasn’t sure that I wanted to know anymore. I was starting to get the impression that this was a very sad story with a terrible ending.

  “I assumed she’d get better, I paid for her to get the best treatment and I thought it’d work. Of course, it didn’t. Phoebe knew that it wasn’t going to, but I couldn’t be convinced. She tried to tell me that I needed to start connecting with the kids before it was too late, but I wouldn’t listen. I felt like if I gave into her demands I’d be accepting that I was going to lose her.”

  “That must’ve been so hard.” My problems absolutely paled into insignificance as he told me about his life. Just because he had money, didn’t make him happy.

  “She died eighteen months ago, and I still can’t connect with James and Lorna. I try my best, but it’s really hard to manage the business and build bonds.”

  “Wow, that’s rough,” I murmured sadly. “I’m so sorry that all happened to you, that’s horrible.”

  “You must think I’m pathetic,” he smiled weakly, but I could see the tears shining behind his eyes. “Sorry to dump all of this on you, it’s just crazy to see all the nannies connecting with them more than me.”

  “Do you mean Meghan too?”

  “Urgh, see that’s just another issue. They both love Meghan, and she’s leaving to go back to college. I can’t blame her for wanting to better her life, but still I don’t know what to do with the kids. I’m stuck.”

  Oh wow, James was going to be absolutely gutted, it was a shame for him to lose someone that he felt so close to. It was a shame that I couldn’t stay around for longer…

  Wait a minute! Maybe this was like a trial thing, maybe if I did a really good job here, he would keep me on permanently. I’d already decided that I wanted to do something good here, but now it was even more important.

  “The kids will come around,” I told him with a smile, while resting my hand on his arm. “Everything will be okay.”

  “I hope you’re right, I really do.”

  “And don’t ever worry about being pathetic, wait until you hear about my life.” I felt like by opening up a bit, he would see me as more human and that would only serve to make him like me more. Well, I hoped. I also wanted to help him feel a little better. “On the same day, I lost my job because the nursery was closing down, and I found my live-in boyfriend having sex with my best friend.”

  “Wow, that’s a bad day,” Evan smirked and cocked his head sympathetically at me, but somehow it didn’t make me feel too bad. “Sorry that
happened to you too.”

  “I know it’s not quite the same as your story, but I hope it helps.”

  I stood up and moved backwards, trying to create a distance between us before things got too weird, but Evan wasn’t about to let me go. He clung to my arm, staring at me, and although I knew it was oh so wrong, I couldn’t help but be tempted.

  Our eyes were connected, there was a fission bursting between us, a thick tension in the air, and I had no idea what was going to happen next.

  ***

  And then I found out, in the most shocking way possible. Evan crashed his lips against mine and we began kissing frantically, as if there was no tomorrow, or no consequences to face because of our actions. There was something in the back of my mind, screaming at me to stop because it was wrong, but I couldn’t. I’d lost all control of myself and become a slave to my emotions instead.

  Fireworks of passion exploded in my stomach, and an intense chemistry flowed through my veins. I moved myself in closer to his body, molding myself against him, really losing myself in the moment, and as I did I felt Evan’s hands snake up into my hair. He was consuming me, controlling me, and I loved every single minute of it. It felt absolutely incredible.

  “Oh God, Ali,” he groaned into my lips, as the passion claimed him as well. “You feel so good.”

  That was enough to have me leaping backwards in shock. This was wrong, this was a fantasy, not something that should become a reality. The kiss was bad enough, we couldn’t possibly go any further. That would absolutely wreck my chances at getting a job with this man. I was supposed to be making myself inaccessible, not jumping his bones. What an idiot, and after that sad, sorry story too.

  What was I doing? Why did I seem to have absolutely no control over myself at all?

  “Oh God, I’m sorry,” I murmured like an idiot, my face heating up with humiliation. At least Evan had the excuse that he’d been drinking, I had no reason for doing this. It was entirely my fault. “I probably should go.”