Burning Desire

by Marie Harte

  That didn’t sound threatening. Not at all.

  “Dad, you can’t legally force Tex out of a job for dating me.”

  “That’s illegal, sir,” Tex agreed. “I do my job well. And I love it.”

  “But do you love her more?” the chief asked, turned, and left.

  They sat, shell-shocked, still holding hands. Tex would have loved to answer the chief, but he didn’t know, exactly, what to say. Did he love Bree? No doubt. Enough to give up his job for her? To give up the thing that made him happy, that felt like a part of his makeup? Being a firefighter wasn’t just a job to Tex. It was his life.

  But why the heck should he have to choose between the two?

  “He is acting so weird,” Bree said, her voice a little shaky.

  Tex turned his chair and leaned close to kiss her. “You okay?”

  “I don’t know. I’m so sorry. He has no right to threaten your job.”

  “Shh. Honey, it’s not your fault. Your dad ain’t acting sensible about this. But you know what? I’m glad it’s out now. No more hiding.”

  “No.” She gave him a tremulous smile. “So at least there’s that.” She sighed. “You let me know if he does or says anything to you at work. He can’t interfere with your job.”

  “I know.”

  “Not if what he’s mad about has nothing to do with work. I mean, obviously if you mess up at work, he could…”

  “Yeah, it’s sticky. But we’ll handle it.” Should he confess how he felt now? Yet it felt wrong, somehow. “Bree, I care for you. I want us to work. But I don’t want to come between you and your dad.”

  She blinked. “You want to break up?”

  “What?” He leaned back and stared. “Hell, no. Why would you ask that?”

  “Oh, good.” She let out a little sigh of relief. “I feel bad about this. You and I did nothing wrong. We shouldn’t be punished because my dad has a stick up his ass.”

  “Don’t worry about it. I’ll be fine. And yes, I know, I can talk to my union rep if I have any problems.”

  “I was just going to say that.” She smiled.

  “I know. So, is today ruined, or can we still enjoy it?”

  She huffed. “He definitely changed the vibe, that’s for sure.”

  “And I was so hoping to ride that last orgasm for a while. Dang.” Tex pretended to mope then snagged another Danish from the plate in front of them. “Would be sad to let these go to waste.”

  “That’s true.” Bree grabbed a donut. “I’m stress eating now. I should probably stop.” She licked the frosting off her finger, and he couldn’t look away.

  “I like stress eating.” Tex took one of her fingers, dug through the frosting, then brought it to his mouth. Watching her while he sucked her finger clean, he saw the arousal she couldn’t hide. And smiled. “Maybe the two of us should get this stress out of our systems. You know, stuff our faces full so we’re relaxed for a while.”

  Bree’s wide grin encouraged more sucking. “Are you trying to get back in my shower?”

  “Huh?”

  “Every time we have sex, you need to get clean.”

  He chuckled. “No, no. I just find the hot water over my body rids my hangover faster. No idea why, it just does.”

  “Good to know.”

  “Now can we have some kinky donut sex, or are you going to harangue me about your water bill?”

  “Hmm. I wonder if there’s a way you can pay it off.”

  “Well, you know, I have been known to play in the tub with half-naked women. So, tell me, the first time you rode this fine body, was it because you’d deliberately flooded your bathroom or what?”

  She gaped. “Seriously? Water damage just to ride the Tex love train?”

  “That’s a no then?”

  “You’re an idiot.”

  Who loves you. “So, what does that make you?”

  “A woman who should know better but doesn’t care.”

  “Just my type.”

  She smacked him. They laughed and play-fought back to the bedroom, where problems didn’t exist, and tomorrow could wait to rear its ugly head.

  ***

  Sunday at work went off without a hitch. They had a few calls but nothing major. The guys seemed on edge, Tex having told them about his situation with Bree. Though the chief knew, Tex was still keeping his dating life private. The guys agreed that to be a smart move.

  But before Tex left the next morning to start his ninety-six hours off, the lieutenant snapped from inside his office, “McGovern, a word. Now.”

  Shit.

  Wash and Hernandez had been hanging out in the commons with Mack and Reggie.

  “What’s up with Tex?” Hernandez asked. “Ed sounds pissed.”

  Reggie groaned. “Nothing good, apparently.”

  Tex looked at his friends, sighed, and took the beating sure to be coming his way. It couldn’t be that bad, could it?

  ***

  A week later, Tex sat with the guys at Seward Park, staring at the water and feeling glum. Well, Gilchrist had said there would be consequences. But ripping Tex not only from his crew but from Station 44? Tex hadn’t seen that one coming. Not at all.

  “This is bullshit,” Brad said. “He can’t do this.”

  “He can.” Mack sighed. “He hasn’t done anything disciplinary, Brad. It’s a personnel shift. He’s the battalion chief. He has that power.”

  “How are the guys at your new station?” Reggie asked.

  “Okay, I guess.” Tex shrugged. “Pretty understanding, actually. The lieutenant in charge isn’t as together as Ed or Sue, but he’s okay. I do my job, take all the shit work like I’m some newbie, and don’t complain. But man, Gilchrist made it clear as day that anyone so much as looks at his daughters in any way, they’re gonna get what I’m getting.”

  It hurt. Tex missed his friends. They were his family, damn it. Gilchrist had no right fucking with that. “How’s the new guy?”

  Mack snorted. “The son of somebody with money and power in the city is playing at being a firefighter, you ask me. That bullshit about pairing us with the FNG because we’re a stellar crew who can teach him something is crap. I mean, sure, it’s true. We’re awesome. But this guy… He’s a real prize. Thinks he can do no wrong, and he’s barely out of diapers.”

  “Hernandez and his team can’t stand the guy.” Reggie snorted. “I can see why. Within two seconds of joining our team, he started mouthing off like he had a right. And he was wrong about procedure, which Wash had been trying to show him. Guy’s barely been with us for two days and acting like he’s one of us. He’s not.”

  “You can’t blame him for that.” Tex felt tired. “For being an arrogant ass, sure. But not for being new.”

  “No, we blame you,” Reggie growled.

  That hurt.

  “Reggie.” Mack shook his head.

  Brad frowned. “Come on, Reg. Tex doesn’t want this.”

  Tex scowled. “You think I like working with guys who know I’m the station fuckup? Who enjoy disc golf and art flicks in their spare time rather than having a beer and playing ball?”

  “Oh, that’s harsh.” Brad cringed.

  Reggie leaned back and shrugged. “Well, you wanted the girl.”

  “Reg, stop.” Brad frowned at him.

  “Gilchrist is fucking with you,” Mack said to Tex, cutting in. “Trying to see if you’re serious about his daughter.”

  “Who knows?” Tex wished he did. “He hasn’t done anything wrong, exactly. I do the same job. Same pay. Just in another part of the city.”

  “Station 44 isn’t the same,” Brad said. “Everyone feels it. Ed’s been bitching at all of us.”

  “Especially our crew,” Reggie said, glaring at Tex. “Why, man? I get that you like her. But we’re your brothers. Would you
rather be with her than with us?”

  Tex blinked. He hadn’t realized how hard this would be for all of them. “Of course not. I love you guys. I’ll get back eventually.” Somehow. “I think Mack might be right.”

  “I’m always right.”

  Tex had to hand it to the guy. Even this disaster hadn’t killed Mack’s sense of humor, which Tex appreciated. He winked at Mack. “Of course you are. My point is, I think Gilchrist is trying to make me to back off with Bree.”

  “You think?” Reggie shook his head. “What he did isn’t right. But it does make you think. Is leaving us worth it?”

  “I love her, Reg,” Tex admitted aloud for the first time.

  The guys quieted and stared at him.

  “You do know what that word means, right?” Mack asked.

  “Shut up, Mack.” Brad scowled, but Tex saw him work to hold back the grin that threatened. “Such an asshole. Look, Tex, I’m glad you finally found someone. I think what Gilchrist is doing is shitty, but you have to do what’s right for you.” Brad stood and crossed his arms over his chest, looking like a fucking superhero as he claimed, “We’re not going anywhere. And your spot, not that dickhead Gornutt’s, is waiting.”

  “We call him Goat Nut. He hates it,” Mack confided.

  “Goat Nut,” Brad corrected, “is just filler. Keep it together, and before you know it, you’ll be back with us. But in the meantime, when our schedules mesh, we keep doing what we’re doing. Working out together, hanging out together, remaining a unit, in or out of the firehouse.”

  “Roger that.” Mack grinned. “Get it? Roger that?”

  Tex grinned despite his heartache. “Can I hit him? I’ve been missing that a lot.”

  Reggie finally smiled. “Please do. Then we can get back to this run. I think I’m getting faster, Tex. In fact, I’m pretty sure I can beat you now.”

  “It’s on, Navy. Let’s race.” And hope I don’t pull so far away, I can’t ever come back.

  ***

  Ed O’Brien glared at a man he’d been friends with for years. “This is bullshit, and you know it.”

  John Gilchrist sighed and rubbed his eyes. His daughter had been on his ass the past week, claiming he needed to get over this overprotective instinct. His wife had called him a few choice names and was only grudgingly speaking to him. The station staff had been tiptoeing around him, all except for his assistant, who didn’t care what the hell he did so long as he kept to his schedule.

  “You have a point to make?” He liked Ed. A lot. They were old friends, but they also had a particular role to play in the hierarchy of the fire department. Took a lot of balls for Ed to stand up for McGovern.

  “This is horseshit. Come on, John. Tex is one of my best. He’s fun, makes the department look good, and makes C shift as good as it is. Those two crews are strong and making my job easier. Then you grab Tex and stick me with Gornutt? They hate him.”

  Hell, John hated him. But the governor’s friend’s kid needed a place to show his stuff, and he’d passed all the tests and gotten into the department on his own merit. Gornutt had earned a right to be in the department. Maybe not at the new station, however.

  “They call him Goat Nut,” Ed said as John had taken a sip of coffee.

  After choking and nearly spitting up over himself, he glared at Ed as he finally swallowed. “Stressing the new guy is not going to help.”

  “Neither is taking one of my top firefighters because he’s dating your daughter.”

  “He needs to learn flexibility. Responsibility. How to handle tough situations and push through.”

  “He does that every day. And he’s been dealing with you without breaking down.”

  “For a week. Give it a little time, and we’ll see how things roll. So Goat Nut, ah, I mean, Gornutt, what’s his status?”

  Ed sighed and reported his findings. He gave John a rundown of some issues to look into, including lowered morale, then left with a disgusted look on his face.

  John watched him go, wondering if he was making such a bad choice after all.

  But no, he knew what living with a firefighter had done to his first wife. Recalled all the pain, the tears, and the heartache she’d had to deal with. He didn’t have much of her left, only the memories he carried. The guilt.

  And a daughter he loved more than life itself. In time, she’d understand why he’d done what he’d done. And if Tex McGovern was the man his daughter insisted he was, then he’d make his choice and choose a life with Bree over his job.

  Sometimes you had to hurt the ones you loved to help them.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Bree glared at Tex, who glared back. He’d been working with another fire station for the past two weeks, and the guilt for his situation and blame sat heavily, weighting her down. They still enjoyed each other, still loved spending their spare time together, but she couldn’t face his friends with what her father had done. So, they’d been apart more often than not on his free days.

  Work had resumed, still polishing her project so it would be ready for the city unveiling in two weeks, but at least she had her assistant to help. Her nerves felt stretched thin, on edge because of how important her work was and because her personal relationships seemed to be struggling.

  At least she’d mended fences with Carrie. Though they had yet to really sit down and discuss why the hell Carrie had tried to involve herself in Bree’s relationship with Melissa, Carrie hadn’t pushed it again. She had apologized, and that was all Bree had needed to hear.

  But some tiny kernel of…something unpleasant remained between them. Unfortunately, Bree didn’t have it in her to dig deep and rip it out. Not yet.

  “I’m not talking to your father about this,” Tex said, spacing his words evenly.

  “Tex, it’s my fault, I—”

  “You can deal with your dad however you like. He’s your dad.” He drew her closer as they sat in her living room, trying to enjoy a movie night at home. “But he’s my boss. I can’t talk to him the way you do. I won’t. He can pull all the crappy things he wants with me, and I’ll take it. I won’t break for that bastard.” He blinked. “I’m sorry. You’re in a bad place with this all around.”

  “I know.” She tried not to cry. But her father made no sense! “I’ve talked to him. Charlie’s talked to him. I heard even Ed talked to him.”

  “He did?” Tex blinked then smiled. “Good old LT.”

  “My dad isn’t reasonable about this. I know it’s affecting you and your friends. I feel like it’s my fault. Maybe if we broke up for a while…”

  “But don’t you see? That’s what he wants.”

  She frowned at the vehemence in his voice. “Um, you’re not just staying with me to stick it to my old man, are you?”

  “What? No. That’s stupid.”

  “I’m stupid?”

  “Fuck, Bree. You’re not hearing me.”

  The argument went downhill from there. Date night turned into time alone for both of them. Tex left. Bree stared at her empty home and burst into tears.

  Her father was being such a huge ass. She called him. When he answered, she said again, “Why are you doing this?”

  “Why, hello, daughter. How are you this evening?”

  “You are ruining my life, Dad. And you’re ruining Tex’s. You have no right to—”

  “I have every right,” he interrupted. “I make decisions about my battalion all the time. Your boyfriend is no more special than any of my other people. I won’t make concessions just because he’s dating you.”

  She took a deep breath, knowing she was getting nowhere. “Dad, I understand that you’re trying to control my personal life for some reason. I think it’s out of love, but you’re coming across as controlling and frankly, uncaring. I really don’t understand why.”

  He sighed. “Honey, when your mot
her was alive, the man she was in love with broke her heart.”

  “Yes, then she met you.”

  “No. I broke her heart. First her ex did, then I did. Firefighters live hard lives. It’s not glorious, and it’s not easy. We do it because we want to help people. But helping sometimes leaves scars. The divorce rate is through the roof. The propensity for our people to turn to drink or drugs to deal with this life is high. I’ve lived it. And so did your mother. I don’t want that for you. I promised my Allie I’d take care of you, and I will until the day I die. You might hate me for it, and you might think I’m being a real bastard. Maybe I am.

  “But I’m only in charge of a small part of my world. It’s not like I’m telling Tex he can’t date you. If you’re that important to him, why can’t he give up his job and try something else? He’s smart, capable. Why not find a stable occupation and settle down?”

  “Dad, are you hearing yourself? You want Tex to marry me? We’ve only been dating a few weeks.”

  “I’m not saying marry him now,” he hurried to say. “I just mean that you should always come first, before the job. And if he can’t see that, then who am I really hurting? It’s his choice. I love you, honey. I’ll talk to you when you’re not so upset. Okay?”

  He disconnected.

  Much of what he’d said made sense…if she and Tex had been dating for four years and planned to settle down. But by her dad’s admission, if Tex couldn’t commit to Bree after being together for—she did the math—one month, then he should be tossed aside?

  For that matter, what did that comment mean about hurting Bree’s mom? What had that been about? Charlie, unfortunately, couldn’t explain John’s actions, nor could she get through her husband’s thick head, though she’d been trying.

  What the ever-living fuck?

  Baffled, annoyed, and heartsick, Bree just sat there, staring at the blank television screen, trying to get up the energy to pour herself a glass of wine she didn’t want.

  Someone rang her doorbell.

  Just great. She hoped to see Tex but didn’t know if she had the energy to argue with him. She kept trying to help him. He kept telling her he’d handle it. And when she suggested taking a break to help him get back to his friends, he insisted on them not giving in to pressure.