Noli me tángere. English

by José Rizal

  CHAPTER L

  Elias's Story

  "Some sixty years ago my grandfather dwelt in Manila, being employedas a bookkeeper in a Spanish commercial house. He was then very young,was married, and had a son. One night from some unknown cause thewarehouse burned down. The fire was communicated to the dwelling of hisemployer and from there to many other buildings. The losses were great,a scapegoat was sought, and the merchant accused my grandfather. Invain he protested his innocence, but he was poor and unable to pay thegreat lawyers, so he was condemned to be flogged publicly and paradedthrough the streets of Manila. Not so very long since they still usedthe infamous method of punishment which the people call the '_caballoy vaca_,' [133] and which is a thousand times more dreadful than deathitself. Abandoned by all except his young wife, my grandfather sawhimself tied to a horse, followed by an unfeeling crowd, and whippedon every street-corner in the sight of men, his brothers, and in theneighborhood of numerous temples of a God of peace. When the wretch,now forever disgraced, had satisfied the vengeance of man with hisblood, his tortures, and his cries, he had to be taken off the horse,for he had become unconscious. Would to God that he had died! Butby one of those refinements of cruelty he was given his liberty. Hiswife, pregnant at the time, vainly begged from door to door for work oralms in order to care for her sick husband and their poor son, but whowould trust the wife of an incendiary and a disgraced man? The wife,then, had to become a prostitute!"

  Ibarra rose in his seat.

  "Oh, don't get excited! Prostitution was not now a dishonor for heror a disgrace to her husband; for them honor and shame no longerexisted. The husband recovered from his wounds and came with his wifeand child to hide himself in the mountains of this province. Here theylived several months, miserable, alone, hated and shunned by all. Thewife gave birth to a sickly child, which fortunately died. Unableto endure such misery and being less courageous than his wife, mygrandfather, in despair at seeing his sick wife deprived of all careand assistance, hanged himself. His corpse rotted in sight of the son,who was scarcely able to care for his sick mother, and the stenchfrom it led to their discovery. Her husband's death was attributedto her, for of what is the wife of a wretch, a woman who has beena prostitute besides, not believed to be capable? If she swears,they call her a perjurer; if she weeps, they say that she is acting;and that she blasphemes when she calls on God. Nevertheless, theyhad pity on her condition and waited for the birth of another childbefore they flogged her. You know how the friars spread the beliefthat the Indians can only be managed by blows: read what Padre Gasparde San Agustin says! [134]

  "A woman thus condemned will curse the day on which her child is born,and this, besides prolonging her torture, violates every maternalsentiment. Unfortunately, she brought forth a healthy child. Two monthsafterwards, the sentence was executed to the great satisfaction ofthe men who thought that thus they were performing their duty. Notbeing at peace in these mountains, she then fled with her two sonsto a neighboring province, where they lived like wild beasts, hatingand hated. The elder of the two boys still remembered, even amid somuch misery, the happiness of his infancy, so he became a tulisan assoon as he found himself strong enough. Before long the bloody nameof Balat spread from province to province, a terror to the people,because in his revenge he did everything with blood and fire. Theyounger, who was by nature kind-hearted, resigned himself to hisshameful fate along with his mother, and they lived on what the woodsafforded, clothing themselves in the cast-off rags of travelers. Shehad lost her name, being known only as _the convict, the prostitute,the scourged_. He was known as the son of his mother only, becausethe gentleness of his disposition led every one to believe that hewas not the son of the incendiary and because any doubt as to themorality of the Indians can be held reasonable.

  "At last, one day the notorious Balat fell into the clutches of theauthorities, who exacted of him a strict accounting for his crimes,and of his mother for having done nothing to rear him properly. Onemorning the younger brother went to look for his mother, who hadgone into the woods to gather mushrooms and had not returned. Hefound her stretched out on the ground under a cotton-tree beside thehighway, her face turned toward the sky, her eyes fixed and staring,her clenched hands buried in the blood-stained earth. Some impulsemoved him to look up in the direction toward which the eyes of thedead woman were staring, and he saw hanging from a branch a basketand in the basket the gory head of his brother!"

  "My God!" ejaculated Ibarra.

  "That might have been the exclamation of my father," continued Eliascoldly. "The body of the brigand had been cut up and the trunk buried,but his limbs were distributed and hung up in different towns. Ifever you go from Kalamba to Santo Tomas you will still see a witheredlomboy-tree where one of my uncle's legs hung rotting--nature hasblasted the tree so that it no longer grows or bears fruit. The samewas done with the other limbs, but the head, as the best part of theperson and the portion most easily recognizable, was hung up in frontof his mother's hut!"

  Ibarra bowed his head.

  "The boy fled like one accursed," Elias went on. "He fled from townto town by mountain and valley. When he thought that he had reacheda place where he was not known, he hired himself out as a laborer inthe house of a rich man in the province of Tayabas. His activity andthe gentleness of his character gained him the good-will of all whodid not know his past, and by his thrift and economy he succeeded inaccumulating a little capital. He was still young, he thought hissorrows buried in the past, and he dreamed of a happy future. Hispleasant appearance, his youth, and his somewhat unfortunate conditionwon him the love of a young woman of the town, but he dared not askfor her hand from fear that his past might become known. But loveis stronger than anything else and they wandered from the straightpath, so, to save the woman's honor, he risked everything by askingfor her in marriage. The records were sought and his whole pastbecame known. The girl's father was rich and succeeded in having himprosecuted. He did not try to defend himself but admitted everything,and so was sent to prison. The woman gave birth to twins, a boy and agirl, who were nurtured in secret and made to believe that their fatherwas dead no difficult matter, since at a tender age they saw theirmother die, and they gave little thought to tracing genealogies. As ourmaternal grandfather was rich our childhood passed happily. My sisterand I were brought up together, loving one another as only twins canlove when they have no other affections. When quite young I was sentto study in the Jesuit College, and my sister, in order that we mightnot be completely separated, entered the Concordia College. [135] Afterour brief education was finished, since we desired only to be farmers,we returned to the town to take possession of the inheritance leftus by our grandfather. We lived happily for a time, the future smiledon us, we had many servants, our' fields produced abundant harvests,and my sister was about to be married to a young man whom she adoredand who responded equally to her affection.

  "But in a dispute over money and by reason of my haughty dispositionat that time, I alienated the good will of a distant relative, andone day he east in my face my doubtful birth and shameful descent. Ithought it all a slander and demanded satisfaction. The tomb whichcovered so much rottenness was again opened and to my consternationthe whole truth came out to overwhelm me. To add to our sorrow, wehad had for many years an old servant who had endured all my whimswithout ever leaving us, contenting himself merely with weeping andgroaning at the rough jests of the other servants. I don't know how myrelative had found it out, but the fact is that he had this old mansummoned into court and made him tell the truth: that old servant,who had clung to his beloved children, and whom I had abused manytimes, was my father! Our happiness faded away, I gave up our fortune,my sister lost her betrothed, and with our father we left the townto seek refuge elsewhere. The thought that he had contributed toour misfortunes shortened the old man's days, but before he died Ilearned from his lips the whole story of the sorrowful past.

  "My sister and I were left alone. She wept a great deal, but evenin the midst of
such great sorrows as heaped themselves upon us,she could not forget her love. Without complaining, without utteringa word, she saw her former sweetheart married to another girl, but Iwatched her gradually sicken without being able to console her. Oneday she disappeared, and it was in vain that I sought everywhere,in vain I made inquiries about her. About six months afterwards Ilearned that about that time, after a flood on the lake, there hadbeen found in some rice fields bordering on the beach at Kalamba,the corpse of a young woman who had been either drowned or murdered,for she had had, so they said, a knife sticking in her breast. Theofficials of that town published the fact in the country round about,but no one came to claim the body, no young woman apparently haddisappeared. From the description they gave me afterward of her dress,her ornaments, the beauty of her countenance, and her abundant hair,I recognized in her my poor sister.

  "Since then I have wandered from province to province. My reputationand my history are in the mouths of many. They attribute great deedsto me, sometimes calumniating me, but I pay little attention to men,keeping ever on my way. Such in brief is my story, a story of one ofthe judgments of men."

  Elias fell silent as he rowed along.

  "I still believe that you are not wrong," murmured Crisostomo in a lowvoice, "when you say that justice should seek to do good by rewardingvirtue and educating the criminals. Only, it's impossible, Utopian! Andwhere could be secured so much money, so many new employees?"

  "For what, then, are the priests who proclaim their mission of peaceand charity? Is it more meritorious to moisten the head of a childwith water, to give it salt to eat, than to awake in the benightedconscience of a criminal that spark which God has granted to everyman to light him to his welfare? Is it more humane to accompanya criminal to the scaffold than to lead him along the difficultpath from vice to virtue? Don't they also pay spies, executioners,civil-guards? These things, besides being dirty, also cost money."

  "My friend, neither you nor I, although we may wish it, can accomplishthis."

  "Alone, it is true, we are nothing, but take up the cause of thepeople, unite yourself with the people, be not heedless of theircries, set an example to the rest, spread the idea of what is calleda fatherland!"

  "What the people ask for is impossible. We must wait."

  "Wait! To wait means to suffer!"

  "If I should ask for it, the powers that be would laugh at me."

  "But if the people supported you?"

  "Never! I will never be the one to lead the multitude to get by forcewhat the government does not think proper to grant, no! If I shouldever see that multitude armed I would place myself on the side of thegovernment, for in such a mob I should not see my countrymen. I desirethe country's welfare, therefore I would build a schoolhouse. I seekit by means of instruction, by progressive advancement; without lightthere is no road."

  "Neither is there liberty without strife!" answered Elias.

  "The fact is that I don't want that liberty!"

  "The fact is that without liberty there is no light," replied thepilot with warmth. "You say that you are only slightly acquaintedwith your country, and I believe you. You don't see the struggle thatis preparing, you don't see the cloud on the horizon. The fight isbeginning in the sphere of ideas, to descend later into the arena,which will be dyed with blood. I hear the voice of God--woe unto themwho would oppose it! For them History has not been written!"

  Elias was transfigured; standing uncovered, with his manly faceilluminated by the moon, there was something extraordinary abouthim. He shook his long hair, and went on:

  "Don't you see how everything is awakening? The sleep has lasted forcenturies, but one day the thunderbolt [136] struck, and in striking,infused life. Since then new tendencies are stirring our spirits,and these tendencies, today scattered, will some day be united, guidedby the God who has not failed other peoples and who will not fail us,for His cause is the cause of liberty!"

  A solemn silence followed these words, while the banka, carried alonginsensibly by the waves, neared the shore.

  Elias was the first to break the silence. "What shall I tell thosewho sent me?" he asked with a change from his former tone.

  "I've already told you: I greatly deplore their condition, butthey should wait. Evils are not remedied by other evils, and in ourmisfortunes each of us has his share of blame."

  Elias did not again reply, but dropped his head and rowed along untilthey reached the shore, where he took leave of Ibarra: "I thank you,sir, for the condescension you have shown me. Now, for your own good,I beg of you that in the future you forget me and that you do notrecognize me again, no matter in what situation you may find me."

  So saying, he drew away in the banka, rowing toward a thicket on theshore. As he covered the long distance he remained silent, apparentlyintent upon nothing but the thousands of phosphorescent diamondsthat the oar caught up and dropped back into the lake, where theydisappeared mysteriously into the blue waves.

  When he had reached the shadow of the thicket a man came out of itand approached the banka. "What shall I tell the capitan?" he asked.

  "Tell him that Elias, if he lives, will keep his word," was thesad answer.

  "When will you join us, then?"

  "When your capitan thinks that the hour of danger has come."

  "Very well. Good-by!"

  "If I don't die first," added Elias in a low voice.