Backlash

by Traci Hunter Abramson

  “I was in the neighborhood and thought I would stop by,” Seth told him. “I just dropped Vanessa off for her last meeting with the caterer.”

  Kel’s eyebrows lifted, and he motioned for Seth to sit down. “She didn’t make you go with her?”

  “I guess you could say she took pity on me.” Seth let out a soft laugh and lowered himself into a chair. “I hate dealing with those kinds of things. Besides, she knows what I like.”

  “Really?” Kel asked, a touch of the bitterness coursing through him, seeping into the word before he could stop it.

  “Yeah.” Seth’s dark eyes sharpened, but his body remained relaxed. “Is something wrong?”

  Kel jerked one shoulder up and avoided the question. “Just a lot going on, I guess.”

  “Like?”

  Kel let out a sigh and shook his head. Then he asked a question that surprised both of them. “Do you think you really know Vanessa?”

  “Well, yeah.” Seth shrugged. “I’ve known her since we were in high school.”

  “Yeah, but do you really know her?” Kel continued. “Do you know what she hopes for in the future? What her biggest dreams are?”

  “I don’t know. I guess I never really thought of it that way,” Seth said now, sounding a bit less certain. “We’ve talked about getting a house and having kids. I know she wants to keep working at least for the next couple of years, but after that she hasn’t really decided.”

  “Are you okay with it if she wants to keep working after you have kids?”

  “Yeah. I don’t know why not.” Seth shrugged. “Personally, I doubt she would want to stay full time for long after starting a family.” Then he leaned forward and grinned. “And I did tell her that I was putting my foot down about undercover assignments once we have kids. It’s one thing to have to lie to your neighbors about where your wife is, but there’s no way I want to try that with a two-year-old.”

  Kel laughed, despite the hollowness that still filled him. “I can see your point.”

  Seth shifted in his chair and stretched one long leg out in front of him. “So are you going to tell me what’s bothering you?”

  Kel started to shake his head and then reconsidered. Though he knew he could trust all of the men in the unit to keep a secret, Seth was the one who could have taught a class on the meaning of confidentiality. “I guess I’m starting to realize that I don’t know my wife as well as I thought I did.”

  “I’m sure being together so much has to be a huge adjustment for both of you,” Seth said. “When was the last time you were home for longer than a long weekend? Even when we’re not on assignment, you still go to work every day, and she has the house to herself.”

  “Yeah, but it’s more than that,” Kel admitted. “I was putting away the books that you guys got from my house, and I came across a manuscript Marilyn had written.”

  “I didn’t know Marilyn was a writer.” Seth’s eyebrows lifted slightly.

  “Neither did I.”

  Seth was quiet for a brief moment, and then he nodded. “And therein lies the problem.”

  “I can’t believe I’ve been married to her for five years, and not once did she ever tell me that she liked to write.”

  “That is pretty odd,” Seth agreed cautiously.

  “What’s even worse is that her story parallels our lives. It’s like everything that she doesn’t like about the SEALs and the navy is woven into those pages.”

  Seth considered for a minute. “So, what bothers you more? The fact that she didn’t tell you about her writing or that you didn’t like what she wrote?”

  “I don’t know.” Kel shook his head. “I guess I already knew how she felt about my career, but reading about it that way really hit home.”

  “Sounds like she’s a pretty good writer.”

  Kel considered for a moment and then let out a half laugh. “You know, I didn’t even think about it, but yeah, I guess she is.”

  “I wonder if she knows that.”

  “Knows what?”

  “That she’s a good writer.” Seth shrugged. “Why do you think she hid it from you?”

  “I’ve been wondering the same thing.”

  “A lot of those creative types get funny when it comes to their art,” Seth commented. “And Marilyn’s always struck me as being a bit shy. Maybe she was afraid to show her writing to anyone for fear that she’d find out it wasn’t any good.”

  “I don’t know. Maybe, but I didn’t think I was just anyone.” Kel considered Seth’s opinion. “The real question is what do I do now?”

  Seth paused for a moment. “Seems to me that you’ve got two choices. You can support her writing, or you can go back to the way things were and pretend you don’t know anything about it.”

  “And if I decide to try to support this hobby of hers, then what?”

  “Like I’m such an expert on women.” Seth laughed now. “All I know for sure is that the women I’ve known all seem to expect us to read their minds.”

  “Maybe you know more about women than I gave you credit for.”

  “I don’t know about that, but I have known Vanessa a long time, and she’s definitely made me work through a few of those mind-reading expectations.” He stood up and tapped Kel on the shoulder. “If nothing comes to mind, pray about it. I’m sure you’ll figure something out.”

  “Thanks, Seth.” Kel stood up. “Thanks for stopping by.”

  “Anytime.”

  29

  Marilyn watched Kel and Seth on the deck below, embarrassment still burning deep inside her. She could only imagine what they were saying, talking and laughing about the words she had written.

  For so long she had worried that this day would come, that Kel would find out about her writing, that he would patronize it as a simple hobby or that he would hate what she had written. The look on his face when she had found him reading her work had been even worse than she had imagined it would be. He had looked so disappointed, so betrayed.

  She had thought that if Kel found her writing that he might ask her what it was or where it had come from. She had never truly thought that he would read it or at least not much of it. With a sigh, she tried to slow down her thoughts, forcing herself to consider what she should have expected. Did she really think that he would find her half-written novel and say, “Here, honey, I think this is yours”? Even more unrealistic was the absurd idea that he would have pretended he had never seen it in the first place.

  After leaving Kel in the office, she had gone upstairs and locked herself in the spare bedroom that overlooked the water. Hoping to escape from reality, she had turned on her laptop and tried to bury herself in her story. For once she hadn’t been able to write through her insecurities and frustrations. Instead, she had sat down by the window and opened the pages Kel had read. Thinking of him, she began reading them herself.

  Each word was painful to read, especially since the new version on her computer was so vastly altered from what was in front of her now. These characters were bitter, much more so than their revised selves. Their anger and resentment, even their hopes and dreams, seemed so much different than how she thought of them now.

  Although she hadn’t been able to spend much time writing over the past two weeks, she felt the story slowly moving forward. With Kel at home, her only time writing had been during his physical therapy appointments, but even those few minutes had given her hope that she was nearing the end of the story. Now she didn’t know if she would ever be able to explore where the characters were destined to go.

  Marilyn heard the door close below her, and she looked outside to see that Kel and Seth were no longer sitting there. She rested one hand on the windowsill and stared out into the darkening sky. She imagined Kel would come look for her eventually. Then again, maybe he wouldn’t. Marilyn wasn’t sure she was ready to face him yet.

  Then she heard Kel call her name, and she couldn’t move. She could hear him looking briefly in their room, and then a knock came on the do
or.

  “Marilyn, open the door.”

  She couldn’t answer. She couldn’t find any words.

  Then she heard the lock turning, followed by the doorknob, and the door swung open.

  “We need to talk,” Kel began.

  Marilyn’s embarrassment crested, and her silence was broken. “You were talking to Seth about me. You told him what you found.”

  “Yeah, I talked to Seth. He’s a friend, one I can confide in,” Kel said defensively.

  “How could you? How could you tell him about what I wrote, what you read?” Marilyn felt tears sting her eyes. “Did it ever occur to you that I might not want your friends to know how I spend my free time?”

  “Do your friends know how you spend your free time?” Kel asked now, a fresh wave of frustration cresting.

  “I only have one friend, but no, Heather doesn’t know about any of this.”

  Kel considered her words, oddly satisfied that Marilyn’s secret hadn’t been kept only from him. His next thought was the realization of how much Heather’s move would affect her. Focusing back on the issue at hand, he blew out a breath. “If you don’t want people to know you’re a writer, that’s your business.”

  “I’m not a writer,” Marilyn said, interrupting him.

  Kel looked at her completely perplexed. “Then what do you call the manuscript I found downstairs?”

  “It’s just something I was playing around with,” Marilyn muttered. “It’s nothing.”

  “Marilyn, don’t shut me out. I may not do a lot of reading, but even I can recognize when someone knows how to write,” Kel said. “And you know how to write.”

  She didn’t know what to say. For years she had barely admitted to anyone that she wanted to write, always wondering if she was good enough to share her words. Kel’s offhanded comment evoked both hope and fear.

  He limped forward until he was standing beside her. Then he looked out the window as though gathering his thoughts. “I didn’t mean to invade your privacy or anything. I was just so surprised when I came across that folder. I had no idea that you liked to write.” Kel shifted to look at her now. “And I thought I knew you.”

  “You do know me.”

  “No, I don’t.” Kel shook his head, a sadness reflecting in his eyes. “I only thought I did.”

  Her embarrassment slowly faded as she considered Kel’s feelings. She hated seeing that wounded look on his face. “Kel, I’m sorry. I’ve just never felt comfortable sharing this with anyone.” She stood a little straighter, hoping to explain in a way he could understand. “I guess it’s a little like when you go on a mission and you aren’t allowed to talk about it. You don’t see it as keeping anything from me because you know you aren’t allowed to.”

  “Yeah, but that’s stuff that’s classified, not something that I’m choosing to keep from you.”

  Her eyebrows lifted. “Some of what you keep from me is classified, and some of it is private. You don’t feel comfortable sharing that part of your life with me, just like I didn’t feel comfortable sharing this with you.”

  He looked at her for several long seconds. Then he took a step back. “I guess we both have secrets we feel like we need to keep.”

  Marilyn watched him limp back to the door, her stomach feeling like it was filled with lead. She wanted to say something to wipe away that hurt look, but she didn’t know how.

  Then Kel turned back to look at her. “You must be hungry. Maybe we should go downstairs and get some dinner.”

  “Okay.” Marilyn nodded meekly. She followed him out of the room and wondered how life would ever be able to return to normal.

  * * *

  Phones were ringing as Halim stepped off the elevator and walked toward his new office—if it could even be considered an office. The whole floor of the office building was open except for the cubicles that divided the space into tiny compartments, compartments the people at the electric company called offices.

  Halim had spent several days exploring his options of how to locate where Commander Kelan Bennett was currently hiding. He could admit now that the commander had been relatively thorough when he’d pulled his disappearing act. The DMV didn’t have a change of address for him, and the forwarding address listed at the post office was to a post office box, one that no one ever checked.

  It hadn’t taken long to figure out that the commander was using a series of forwarding addresses to get his mail and that the post office staff wasn’t about to give him enough information to find the final location.

  Realizing that he was going to have to dig deeper, Halim had started hacking into credit card companies until he found the information he was looking for, or at least part of it. The activity on the commander’s cards had been practically nonexistent until several days before. Then the charges had started popping up, all within the Virginia Beach area.

  Hoping that the Bennetts had relocated to somewhere nearby, Halim had taken a job in the customer service department at the electric company in hopes of finding them.

  Someone called out a greeting as he passed by, and Halim gave the man a nod and a forced smile. He couldn’t understand these people or their ignorance. Didn’t they understand that they were at war? One thing was certain. They definitely didn’t know what the enemy looked like; Halim had found one of the Americans’ biggest downfalls.

  The job had been easier to get than he had expected, but hiding his contempt for his co-workers was a constant challenge. They didn’t seem to care what the person sitting beside them looked like or what they believed. Halim only hoped he didn’t have to keep the job for long. Unfortunately, his search so far seemed endless.

  His first two days working had been spent learning how to access the information he needed. The next day he had learned how to appear as though he were helping customers when he was really doing the work he had come here for.

  Each day he sorted through the list of new and transferred service connections and then mapped them on the Internet to narrow down which ones were the most likely based on their proximity to where charge card purchases had occurred.

  The credit card activity had only lasted for about a week, and then it appeared as though the commander had figured out that someone might track him that way. Still, the dates of the charges helped Halim select his targets with care. Already he was spending his off hours observing the various locations on his list to see if he had finally found his target, or, rather, the means to find it.

  His list of possible locations was nearly complete, which would allow him to abandon this tedious job and the annoying friendly co-workers. Once he could begin searching full time, he knew he would be one step closer to finding the Bennetts . . . and the prize they could bring him.

  30

  “How much time do we have?” Kel asked Tristan, as he lowered the tailgate of his truck.

  “Riley said she was taking Marilyn to lunch across town, and then they were going to stop by a thrift store on their way back,” Tristan told him. “That should give us at least two or three hours.”

  “I really appreciate you guys helping me with this.”

  “No problem.” Seth climbed up into the truck and grabbed the end of the new desk they had picked up for Kel. “Marilyn is going to be so surprised.”

  “That’s the idea.” Kel nodded.

  Tristan lifted the bottom part of the desk. “Okay, slide it forward.”

  Kel moved closer and grabbed the center, supporting some of the weight as Seth and Tristan tilted it and slowly lowered it to the ground. Ignoring the cane he was supposed to use for the next few days, Kel leaned into the truck and grabbed the new office chair and moved it closer so he could pull it out of the truck bed.

  As Tristan and Seth maneuvered the desk through the front door, Kel put the chair down on the driveway and began rolling it forward. With a quick glance at his watch, he prayed they would have enough time.

  * * *

  “Thanks again for lunch,” Marilyn said as she climbed
out of Riley’s car.

  “I’m glad you could come,” Riley told her. “Sorry we didn’t find anything good at the thrift store.”

  “That’s okay. You know how those stores are. Sometimes they have great stuff, and sometimes it’s all junk.”

  “So true,” Riley agreed. She leaned forward and added, “Give me a call if you want to hit the yard sales on Saturday.”

  “I will.” Marilyn stepped back. “Thanks again.”

  Riley put the vehicle in gear and waved as she pulled out of the driveway. Marilyn turned and walked up the front steps, wondering if Kel’s mood had improved at all since that morning.

  Everything had been so different when they had finally eaten dinner two nights before, and all day yesterday he had been uncomfortably quiet. She was starting to wish he would fight with her so she would at least know what he was thinking. Then again, she wasn’t sure she wanted to know what he was thinking.

  She still dreaded finding out what he thought of her writing. He seemed to think she had at least some talent, but she was afraid to know what he thought of the story she had created and the parallels it had to their lives. She also wished she could explain that her characters’ emotions were exaggerations of what she sometimes felt, that she often channeled her feelings into her story as a way to keep her problems in perspective.

  Her tension rose as she pushed the door open and saw Kel sitting in the study at his desk. She immediately saw the changes he had made to the room. A narrow table was pushed into the corner behind his desk. Atop the table was a desktop computer.

  “You got a new computer?”

  Kel turned to face her, his expression guarded as he nodded. “I splurged.”

  Her practical streak surfaced, pushing aside her other concerns. “Do you really think we should be spending so much money?”

  “We needed to upgrade our computer anyway,” Kel told her.

  Marilyn nodded automatically, but she couldn’t quite shake the unsettled feeling she had been living with over the past two days. She forced herself to look at him, forced herself to start the conversation she didn’t really want to have. “Kel, we need to talk about what happened the other night.”