Full Circle

by Dillon Watson

  “I overheard Ilene telling Jennifer in IT that you pulled a Lewinsky on Bill to get him to change the requirements for Jolene’s job.”

  “A blow job? Seriously?” She leaned her head back, closed her eyes and counted to ten. If she lived in cartoon land, smoke would be pouring out of her ears. But this was the real world. The ugly, nasty, low-down real world. “I can’t…God, I was expecting something, but this? I can’t believe it. Even of them. I guess I should feel special they think I have that kind of power.” She rubbed her forehead, not sure whether she wanted to scream or cry or maybe both. “Somehow I don’t. Have you heard it from anyone else?”

  Gerri shook her head. “I told both of them that if I heard that crap repeated, I would make sure Bill knew who was fanning the flames. They jumped a mile high, and Ilene immediately tried to backpedal, saying how she knew it wasn’t true.”

  “Then why repeat it? Because it’s part of their plan,” she said, answering her own question. “Debbie warned me to expect something nasty, but did I listen? No. I thought she was playing their game, you know? This. This is going too far.” Mikaela covered her face with her hands, trying to recall any funny looks thrown her way. She couldn’t, so maybe it wasn’t that widespread—yet. “God, this makes me so mad.” And hurt, she admitted to herself. Feeling the burn of tears, she bit her bottom lip hard. Those bitches were not going to make her cry.

  “Hey, no one who knows you is going to pay that any attention. You’ve worked with enough people around here for them to know that’s not you, know that you would never take part in anything like that.” Gerri put a hand on Mikaela’s shoulder. “Maybe I should have kept my big mouth shut.”

  She dropped her hands. “You did the right thing. I would’ve hated to be the last to know.” Taking a deep breath, she let it out slowly. “What to do? Part of me wants to confront Ilene, make her tell me where she got her story from. Which would be a waste of time and give her the satisfaction of knowing they scored a direct hit. What do you think?”

  “Why don’t I check around tomorrow, see who else might have heard. If it’s only a few people, I say do nothing, let it die out. Now if it’s widespread, I say we go to HR, tell them what I heard and you can file a complaint against Ilene. I’ll be happy to tell my side of things. That should be enough for something under that new workplace bullying deal they put in place.”

  “I guess that’s better than my first instinct. And my second.” But Mikaela wasn’t so sure a rap on the hand from HR would help her fight an invisible enemy.

  “If it’s any consolation, I thought about dunking Ilene’s head in the toilet.”

  She managed a wan smile. “We could have gone to the same high school. That was my second choice.”

  “Then I probably don’t want to hear your first choice. Hang in there. Pulling a stunt like this stinks of desperation. I guarantee I’m not the only one who sees it that way.”

  “Thanks. For the pep talk and letting me know.” She fisted a hand on her thigh as Gerri walked away. She hoped Gerri was right and most wouldn’t take it seriously. Unfortunately, there also would be those who’d say they didn’t believe it even as they fueled the fire.

  No, she couldn’t worry about them, couldn’t let them bring her down. The ones who mattered would know it was bullshit, would see the vindictiveness behind the accusation. If they didn’t, well, they would be dropped from her list.

  Any thoughts she had of working flew south. What she needed was to go home and get the sour taste of this place out of her mouth, then come back tomorrow, mask firmly in place.

  Her phone rang before she could get away, and though she knew without an iota of psychic powers it wasn’t going to be good, she answered anyway. “Mikaela…Be right there.” She replaced the receiver gently when she really wanted to give it a couple of good bangs. Given her recent conversation with Gerri, she could well imagine what this unexpected summons to Bill’s office was about. “Damn, damn, damn!”

  She stopped by the bathroom to find her cool. There was a small chance this had nothing to do with the Lewinsky rumor. “Bull!” She’d read too many police procedural novels to believe in coincidences. And if Bill knew, the story had gotten further than Gerri suspected.

  “Fuck!” Mikaela looked around for something to kick. As she drew back her leg to annihilate a plastic trashcan, she remembered what shoes she was wearing—the Manolo Blahniks—too cute and definitely too expensive to risk possible damage. What she needed was a bat. She’d use it like she had in high school when she’d been on the softball team. Step up to the plate and hit a home run with Ilene’s head. Her sorry-ass boyfriend always said she was a good hitter…for a girl.

  Damn if she wouldn’t show those bitches her girl! She exhaled and blinked away tears. No time to fix makeup, she told herself sternly. And crying was part of what they wanted. But it was hard not to be furious. And embarrassed, she added as she left the bathroom and took the stairs to eight. Embarrassed for herself, for Bill, for anyone else caught up in this horrible game.

  Jolene met her in the hallway in front of Bill’s office, her expression grave. “You can go right on in. And try not to worry about a thing.”

  More worried than she’d been before Jolene opened her mouth, Mikaela walked into Bill’s large corner office. Her little fantasy of the meeting being about something other than the Lewinsky maneuver poofed when she noticed the head of HR, Dennis George, sitting at the table with Bill and Talya. She could tell by their expressions she’d been right—they knew. “You wanted to see me?”

  “Have a seat, Mikaela,” Bill said with a strained smile. “What we have here is a delicate situation.” He cleared his throat. “It has come to my attention that allegations concerning unbecoming behavior have been made. Talya thought since these allegations involve you, it was best to apprise you of the situation immediately. Dennis and I concurred. However, I see by your expression that perhaps we’re too late.”

  Reeling under the sting of humiliation, she nodded. If life was fair, she’d be transported to anywhere but here, she thought, watching as Dennis smoothed back his thinning hair. He’d come on at the same time as Bill and it was said they were old friends.

  “Are you comfortable sharing how you found out?” Dennis asked.

  “Gerri. Gerri Xavier. She overheard someone saying…well you know what they were saying.” She clasped her hands, looked down at her lap and concentrated on keeping her cool. “I guess you’ll have to talk to her now and she’s okay with that. She did mention that Ilene—that’s Ilene Jacobs—was, uh, the one doing the talking. I can’t believe someone would spread something this bad about me. About you, Bill.” She looked at him, remembering his pretty wife, his young sons from the holiday party.

  “Don’t worry about that,” Bill was quick to say. “The concern here is how this will affect you.”

  “It’s troubling, but I won’t let it interfere with my work.”

  “We didn’t have any doubt about that,” Talya said.

  “I will need to speak with Gerri,” Dennis said.

  “Yeah.” She looked at him, then quickly looked away. “I really don’t want to have to file a complaint.”

  Dennis closed the folder in front of him. “Hopefully, it won’t come to that. But rest assured, any complaints you may need to file in this matter will not reflect badly on you. This accusation will be taken seriously, coming as it did on top of complaints about the Executive Assistant job posting.”

  The noose around Mikaela’s neck loosened enough to allow for a shallow breath. It was comforting to know she wasn’t the only one questioning the timing. “What should I do now?”

  “Nothing at this point. I plan to speak with Ilene after I get with Gerri.” Dennis glanced at his watch. “Given the hour, neither conversation will happen until tomorrow.”

  “Go home and try to forget about this,” Talya urged. “But know that the three of us are taking this seriously. That there will be consequences.”


  She could only nod. When she closed the door behind her, she took a moment to steady herself.

  “You okay?”

  She blinked away the tears under Jolene’s watchful gaze. “Never expected anything this vicious, I guess.” But she should have. Next time she’d pay closer attention to what Debbie had to say.

  “Nobody could. I’m sorry.”

  “Me too. I mean, I…I’ve never been so humiliated in my life.” She blew out a sharp breath. “Okay. Need to get it together. I don’t want to give anyone the satisfaction of seeing me upset.”

  “Whoever is behind this—and we both have our suspicions—made a big mistake. They don’t understand the old mind-set is gone. I promise you Bill and Dennis will not let this go.”

  “Good. That’s how it should be. I hate to ask how he found out. Bill, I mean.”

  “Ilene told the wrong person, and that person realized Dennis needed to be involved.”

  “Finally something good to focus on. I was going to go home, set up on the couch and wallow in my sorrows. Now I can think fondly about the person who took a stand. And not so fondly about Ilene and how she’s going to explain why she was spreading something she didn’t believe, not once but twice.”

  “A little wallowing never hurt anyone. I hear wine goes well with that. And chocolate.”

  Mikaela managed a genuine smile. “I’ll take that under advisement.”

  Once downstairs, she gathered her belongings, then stopped by Gerri’s office and gave her a heads up. “I owe you big for the advance notice.”

  “You don’t owe me. I know you’d do the same for me.”

  On her way to the elevator, Mikaela walked by a small group of women who stopped whispering as soon as they spotted her. She stared them down until one by one they looked away. Only then did she continue, her head held high. “Fuck them,” she muttered and punched the down button. “Fuck all of them.”

  * * *

  Mikaela donned her most conservative suit the next morning and then took extra effort to cover up the signs of the crying jag that had hit at dawn and made it impossible to fall back asleep. After a last glance in the bathroom mirror, she was satisfied she’d done the best she could.

  As planned, she was the first to arrive in her area. After grabbing coffee, she returned to her desk and saw Sara. Her outlook improved. “Morning.”

  “You’re here early,” Sara said with a big smile. “Not that I’m complaining.”

  The flirtatious tone made her feel even better. “Gotta take care of some things I didn’t get to yesterday. The bathrooms safe today?”

  “So far so good. We’re still on for tomorrow, right?”

  “Absolutely. Is there anything you don’t eat? I mean food-wise,” she quickly clarified when Sara snickered.

  “I’m adventurous. I’ll try most things once.”

  “The problem seems to be getting you to try something more than once,” she dared to say.

  “No fair,” Sara said. “I am working on it.”

  “And it’s much appreciated.”

  “Good. On to the sixth floor. Hopefully I’ll get a chance to see you later.” She fingered one of the tiny dolls on Mikaela’s desk. “Don’t tell anybody, but I played with the car last night.”

  Mikaela laughed at the mischievous expression on Sara’s face. “I’m glad. Stick around me and I’ll have you playing like a kid in no time. Now go make the bathrooms safe for the world.”

  “Hey, now. I check stairwells too.”

  She batted her eyes. “My hero.” Mikaela watched until Sara was out of sight, thinking it was funny how a little flirting with the right person could change one’s attitude.

  Talya arrived an hour later at eight, early for her if she didn’t have a meeting, bearing gifts. “Fruit cup and a grande nonfat latte.”

  “Special thanks for not going with doughnuts. In my current state I could easily down half a dozen before guilt kicked in.”

  “I weighed the comfort of hot Krispy Kreme doughnuts versus saving the diet with fruit. Let me tell you, it was a tough choice.” Talya repositioned her grip on the bag in her left hand.

  Mikaela sniffed the air. “What’s that smell?”

  “I should get to my office. The meeting summary can go out this afternoon if you need the extra time.”

  She narrowed her eyes. “You bought doughnuts for yourself, didn’t you?”

  “I’m hurt that you would think that.”

  “Oh, give it up,” she said, shaking a finger at her boss. “I can smell doughnuts from a mile away.”

  Talya sighed and her shoulders slumped. “I suppose you want one?”

  “Thanks for the gracious offer,” she said, “but no. And when you check your email, you’ll see I sent out the summary already. I’m waiting for a couple of responses before I can set up the next meeting.”

  “How early did you get here?”

  Mikaela looked away from Talya’s concerned gaze. It probably wouldn’t be the final one she’d have to face today. “Closer to seven. Figured I might as well be productive.” She shrugged. “Better than worrying.”

  “Let me put my stuff down and we’ll talk.”

  “That’s okay.” Mikaela squeezed her eyes shut for a moment. “Talking about it will make me all emotional and ruin my makeup. Beauty like mine takes time.”

  “You know I’m available anytime you feel the need to talk or vent.”

  She nodded, not trusting herself to speak. Work is the answer, she told herself and returned to adding the finishing touches to handout number two. Touches she meant to finish yesterday before everything fell apart.

  “Stop.” She was not going down that path again. She already knew it was a winding road, leading to a dead end of “if only.” Her time was better spent making her work shine. So she put the anger and the sadness away and locked them down for later processing.

  She was mentally patting herself on the back for completing not one but two handouts when someone cleared their throat. Mikaela looked up with a ready smile that quickly wilted. “Hey.”

  “You got a minute?”

  It took almost that long for Mikaela to identify the woman in front of her. Three measly degrees of separation were standing at her desk in the form of Tasha from IT, who worked with Jennifer from IT. No way could this be good. She’d probably come to see if there was any truth to the rumors, Mikaela decided. “How’s it going?”

  “Good. Thanks again for organizing the volunteer deal.”

  “I should be thanking you for signing up. What can I help you with?”

  Tasha shifted from side to side. “Actually, I wanted you to know that I’m really sorry about what’s being said.” The expression on Tasha’s dark brown face was earnest. “And I guess I wanted you to know that I know it’s not true.”

  Her brain froze, then clumsily shifted gears. Not at all what she’d been bracing for. “Uh, thanks. You can’t know how much I appreciate you coming to tell me that.”

  “I’m not the only one. Other people I’ve talked to know it’s bogus. So I thought, hey, if it was me I’d want someone to, you know, say something.”

  So not what I’d expected, she thought, blinking rapidly. “I don’t know what to say except thank you, thank you, thank you. It’s nice to know everybody isn’t talking bad about me behind my back.”

  “Hang tough. Once they see no one’s going along, they’ll stop.”

  Mikaela was struck by how young Tasha was, how sweetly naïve. “Thanks, Tasha.” Once she was alone, she pulled out her compact and dabbed at her damp eyes. She was presentable. Now to stay that way.

  “Send what you have to Bill,” Talya said from the doorway of her office as she wrestled with her coat. “I should be back by one thirty. Two if that blowhard Simons gets on a roll. Do I owe you anything?”

  “We’re good. Enjoy the mystery chicken. Oh, I need to go to the Georgia State library for my class. I’ll go on my lunch break, but I may run over.”

  “Ta
ke all the time you need.”

  The rest of the morning brought a steady stream of fellow employees dropping by to offer support and encouragement. Many of them were ones she’d sweated with at Hands on Atlanta day, but there were a few she hadn’t had much contact with. Those she especially treasured. At one point she retreated to the restroom to repair her makeup.

  * * *

  Mikaela hurried off the elevator. She’d taken longer at the library than planned. Her time had been well spent, and now she had the information necessary to complete her next two class assignments. She could finish them up over the weekend and be more than halfway through the course. All in all, it was a victory, and she needed that.

  Baby noises brought her up short. “Pat!” She dropped her bag on her desk and crossed to pull him into a hard hug. “Why didn’t you warn me you were coming?”

  Pat Manes’ green eyes twinkled down at her. “And have you disappear? No way.”

  She laughed, stepped back and gave him the once-over. He was still thin, despite his protestations to the contrary, and his dark blond hair was longer, brushing his shoulders. “Maternity leave looks good on you, ‘Mom.’ Now let me at my baby.”

  Pat gently freed his firstborn from the carrier at his feet. “As you can see she’s grown a little since you last saw her.”

  “Ooh. Looks like she’s going to have Laura’s red hair.” The wispy blond strands Emma had been born with had been replaced by tufts of red. Mikaela held Emma close and breathed in the scents of baby lotion and innocence. “You’re a little beauty, aren’t you? How’s Laura doing?”

  “Good. I dropped her off at the spa for a full body massage. She deserves it. Who knew one little baby could be so much work?”

  “I hear it only gets worse, Daddy.” She rocked from side to side as Emma burrowed against her. “It builds character, I think. Love the ’do man.”

  He put a hand on top of his head. “It’s getting chopped off this weekend. Laura says I’m too pretty to have long hair.”

  “You are pretty, Manes. Does Gerri know you’re here?” She kicked back her chair and sat. “No. She has that meeting until two thirty.”