Sun Touched (Diamara Book 1)

by J. C. Hart

  "I don't think it's a mess, thank you very much." She poked her tongue out at him and he smiled. "Just because you and Sarai have a perfect little life lined up, doesn't mean that's what everyone wants."

  "And this is what you want?" He frowned in confusion.

  Madea thought about it for a moment and then nodded. Apart from the whole 'probably going to go crazy and kill someone' thing, she didn't want to change her life now. It might not have been her first choice, but considering she hadn't really had a plan to begin with, she was okay with it now. "Don't tell Sarai about Jaxon, though. Can you keep your mouth shut?"

  "I don't know about that." Rickard shook his head. "She's pretty good at getting things out of me."

  "The way I see it, you owe me. Big time."

  "Huh?"

  "You went off and fell in love with my sister, without even telling me you might be interested. You were my best friend, you were...we were...you know what you were, and still you went behind my back and now you're getting married. To her!"

  Rickard eyes widened in shock. In fact, she was quite stunned herself. She'd wanted to keep those emotions close to her chest. He knew how she felt, and she shouldn't have had to tell him.

  "I'm sorry, Maddy. Really, I am." His eyes were full of sorrow as he reached out to grab her hand. "I didn't think anything was ever going to happen with you and I missed you. Sarai...she filled that void, and then she carved out a new space in my heart. I love her, Maddy. More than I thought I could love anyone."

  He was being so careful with his words, dodging around her like he always had. She should have known he would fall for someone else—she wasn't easy to love and she had never made room for him in her life. It didn't change the fact that it stung, the way they had each other now and she was left alone.

  Well, not so alone. Maybe that's why she wanted to keep Jaxon, to take care of him. Not to mention the baby. She didn't know what to say, so she said nothing.

  "Are you ever going to forgive me?" Rickard asked. His voice was soft, and he was still holding her hand.

  She glanced away, unable to hold his gaze. "Like I said the other night, I can't hold it against you. It hurts, more than it should."

  "I'm sorry."

  There was a loud bang at the door and Madea jumped from her seat, letting go of Rickard's hand. "Go keep Jaxon quiet." She waited for him to disappear back into the lounge, and then took a breath and went to the door.

  Night had fallen, and before her stood an Enforcer. Her heart thumped in her chest.

  "How can I help?" she asked cautiously. She held her breath, waiting for his response.

  "We can't find Sullivan and we need you to medicate the Touched. There was an incident." He seemed to have no intention of giving her more information.

  "Right, give me a minute. I need my jacket, and the lab keys." She closed the door and let her breath out. At least they hadn't come about the boy, or her.

  Madea grabbed her things, then went into the lounge. "Rickard, can you stay with Jaxon? Something's come up."

  "Is everything okay?"

  "Just a work thing. Don't worry about it." She glared at him, hoping that he would hold any questions until later, then knelt down next to Jaxon. "I'll be as quick as I can, okay? Make sure Rickard makes you something good for dinner." She winked at the boy, then gave him a quick hug.

  After a quick stop at the lab for the medication, where there was no sign of Sullivan, it was barely twenty minutes later that they got to the Hollowing facility. The Enforcer would only say that the degree of the crime committed had been so severe that an instant Hollowing was necessary, nothing more.

  Madea got out of the transport and was escorted inside. There were more guards on duty tonight than she had ever seen before, and they weren't just armed, they had their weapons at the ready. That was a first.

  She was led to the same chamber where Janae had been kept and was surprised to see Jaxon's grandfather strapped to the chair so tightly that the bindings cut into his skin. He was gagged, though that didn't stop him from shrieking.

  "What did he do?" she whispered to the Enforcer. The old man's eyes were wide, pupils dilated and the lines on his face carved deeper than they had been the other day.

  "It doesn't matter." The Enforcer's tone was clipped as he crossed to the man. "You'll need to dose him quickly.”

  "Can you tell me, please?" Madea tugged on the enforcer’s sleeve. "I've never seen a Hollowing go through this fast, I—"

  "If you must know, he went nuts and killed his family. The madness must have come on quick. There were twelve dead when we got there, four injured. It's the worst case we've seen, and we're not about to wait and see how much more dangerous the man will get." He raised his eyebrows at Madea. "Satisfied?"

  "I guess." She nodded, and chewed her lip. Just a few days ago he hadn't seemed mad at all. Well, unless you counted his ravings about Jaxon's dad being the reason why Janae had been Hollowed. Madea remembered how that thought had made her feel, how it had been like tiny claws digging into her belief that the system worked.

  The fact that he was here, now, about to be Hollowed, certainly lent some weight to his conspiracy theories—unless those theories had been born of madness too. But he had seemed so coherent...

  It was too confusing. She had never been good at head games, never been good at political intrigue, and here she was, possibly right in the middle of one. When it came down to it though, she couldn't bring herself to believe that the State was responsible for even a portion of the Sun-Touched in the colony. How could they possibly resort to exposing people, just to get them out of the way? Surely if that was the case, she would have heard rumours of it by now?

  "Are you ready, Miss Linae?"

  "Huh? Oh, yes." Madea shook her head, trying to clear her thoughts. She hadn't realized that they were waiting for her. She got the injection from its case and slid the needle into his vein. He tried to pull away, huffing out his nose, his breath faintly tinged with capsulim. Madea swallowed hard. Sullivan had talked about a new capsulim variant he was working on for her father, but surely he couldn't be involved in this?

  "Did you want to stay this time?" The technician asked her; the same one who had Hollowed Janae. She'd barely noticed him there.

  "No, I'm fine. Thanks." She shook her head fiercely and backed away. The old man's eyes rolled in his head, but she turned away. She hadn't seen madness there, only indignation, rage.

  The Enforcer followed her out and closed the door behind him.

  "Did you know that man?" he asked, stepping close to her and grabbing her arm.

  "I think I might have seen him once in the street or something. I don't know his name though." She twisted away from him, aiming for an indignant expression. "Can I go now?"

  "Yeah, you can." He looked her up and down, and she hoped he couldn't see any falsehood in her. "The transport is waiting outside to take you home. You have a good night."

  "I'll try..." How could anyone have a good night after being called to a Hollowing? And where had Sullivan been that he couldn't make it?

  CHAPTER TEN

  Madea slipped into the transport and closed the door behind her. It wasn't until she had settled herself on a seat that she realised she wasn't alone.

  "Hello again." A vaguely familiar face smiled at her. Garrett’s skin was darker than the last time she had seen him, but he still had that aura of intrigue about him. She brushed her fingers across her skin where she'd felt that sting when they shook hands.

  "It's you, from the herb field...Garrett, wasn't it?" She braced herself as the transport began to move. He half bowed, his lips twitched into an even wider grin. "What are you doing here?"

  "I have a message for you, and I thought this was the best place to pass it on."

  "A message? For me?" Madea frowned. "I think maybe you have mistaken me for someone else."

  "Trust me, I'm not wrong. Your father is Carson Linae, isn't he?"

  "Yes...but what does my father
have to do with this?" She raised an eyebrow.

  "I need you to give him something from me. From us."

  "Look, I don't know who you think I am, or what you want, but I'm too tired for this. I feel terrible. I've just come from a Hollowing—"

  "I know."

  Garrett slid along the seat until he was opposite her. Their knees were almost touching. "You're in a unique position right now."

  "What do you mean?" A chill ran down her back. This man knew something, but what?

  "I saw you in the fields yesterday. And I noted that you were gone for an awfully long time. Are you feeling okay?" He raised an eyebrow, his face serious, but not accusing.

  "I feel fine. Thanks. I don't know what you're talking about." She hunched her shoulders, tension filled her body. He knows, he knows, he knows.

  "You don't have to admit it, that's okay." He dismissed her body language with the wave of a hand. "My point is that your life is going to change pretty soon, and I know some people who want to help you—if you give them a little help in return."

  "What help?" She leaned against the seat, trying to give herself some space from him, trying to feign a lack of interest. She didn't know what was going on here, but she didn't like it. Not one bit. Was this to do with her? Her father? Or was it all tied up with Jaxon and Janae? Did it really matter, if it meant that someone could help her?

  "You might find yourself going through certain...changes, and we can help you with those. Give you some guidance."

  "And if I find that I don't need that help?"

  "There are things you don't know yet, things I'm not at liberty to tell you. I can assure you that sometime soon you are going to start seeing a whole new side of this world though, and when that happens, I want you to contact me."

  "What do you mean?"

  He shook his head, a smile playing on his lips. "No point telling you now, you wouldn’t believe me anyway. Trust me."

  "I don't know why you think I would." It was her turn to shake her head. "Either you tell me what you want, or leave. I don't have the energy for this."

  "Here." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a slim phone. "This is how you can get in touch with me. Mine is the only number you can call, and only once. I'll be keeping an eye on you, from a distance, but if you need me, call."

  "Wait, you mentioned my father. You had something you wanted me to give him?"

  "Ah, yes." He smiled at her, his teeth white and clean. They seemed at odds with the tan of his face. He reached into another pocket and drew out a small box. "The contents won't make any sense to you, but he'll know how to interpret it."

  Madea took it and shoved it into her pocket. There would be plenty of time to open it later. "Is that all?"

  "For now," Garrett said. "Be assured that I'll be in touch, if you don't contact me first."

  "Don't hold your breath."

  He reached a hand out and placed it gently on her knee. She could feel heat radiating off him, more than was normal. "I know it might be hard to believe, but I genuinely want to help you. I hope you'll let me."

  "I don't need your—"

  "This is my stop." Garrett winked, opened the door and jumped down from the transport, despite the fact that it was still moving.

  Madea was left wondering what had occurred as the door slammed shut behind him. The transport felt empty, cool. His presence did something to the air, but she couldn't put her finger on what exactly. She patted her pocket, making sure the box was still there, then drew it out, not wanting to wait until she got home to see what was inside it.

  It was made of wood, and the lid slid free easily. The inside was lined in dark blue fabric and the only thing it contained was a seal with an emblem on it that she couldn't identify. What could it possibly mean? Madea chewed her lip, half tempted to ask the transport to take her straight to her father, to demand answers. But would he give them to her? Or was she better to hold on to this for a few days and ask around? Surely someone must know what it meant.

  She pushed the lid closed again and slipped it back into her pocket.

  She had the unsettling feeling that whatever she was involved in was bigger than the problems that seemed to be cropping up for her left, right and centre. In time, she would find out, but right now all she wanted to do was go to bed.

  Jaxon was asleep on the couch when Madea got home, his gentle snores forced the tension from her shoulders and she leaned against the door, watching him snooze until Rickard came up behind her.

  "He's a good kid," he said. "Do you want to tell me what's going on?"

  "What do you mean?" Madea turned towards the kitchen and Rickard followed. Half of her was pleased he was there, the other half wished he would leave her be. She was so very tired.

  "Since when do you get called out in the evenings for a Hollowing? Since when do they start doing them after hours?"

  "It was a special case," Madea said, choosing her words carefully. She started to heat some coffee, but stopped, opting for cold water instead. "Since when do you care?"

  "You know I care about you."

  "That's not what I meant." Madea sighed and rolled her shoulders. "Since when do you care about how and when they do Hollowings?" She was too tired for this conversation. And when, when would she be able to let her hurt go and stop picking fights with Rickard?

  "I don’t, except when they have something to do with you."

  "They couldn't find Sullivan. I'm the next person on the list, and it's my job to medicate them. That's as involved as it gets."

  "But you don't think it's weird?"

  "Rickard, drop it. Okay?" She wasn't ready to fill him in on the suspicions nagging at her brain, as if speaking them might make them true. "It was a special case, that's all. It's nothing to worry about."

  "If you say so." He shrugged. "It's getting late. I should get home."

  "You should," Madea said. She huffed out a breath and then added, "Thank you for sticking around and taking care of Jaxon for me. I'm still getting used to the idea of it. It's probably good for him to have a guy around from time to time."

  "So you're not kicking me out for good?" Rickard smiled. "I knew you couldn't stay mad."

  "Get out of here before I change my mind," Madea said, though she was smiling now. "I'm in a weird place at the moment, so bear with me, okay?"

  "You know where I am if you need me. And you know where Sarai is. Don't forget that you have people who care." Rickard strode to the door.

  "I won't. Oh, I forgot to mention that I told Sullivan about the baby."

  He swivelled back. "How did that go?"

  "Better than I expected. He's supportive of whatever I want to do. He made sure I knew he was my friend, even if he couldn't be my partner."

  "Couldn't? It's a choice, Maddy. He could, he just won't."

  "Do you think that's how I want to catch a man? By getting pregnant with a child he doesn't want and forcing him to agree to a relationship he had no intention of having?" She spat the words at Rickard, who recoiled.

  "That's not what I meant—"

  "Then why don't you say what you mean? I don't need your charity, and I don't need you to get angry at him for me. He gave me more than I had hoped, and for that, I'm grateful."

  "You...you deserve better. You should have a husband who dotes on you, and a beautiful family home where you can bring up your baby in comfort. I wish you could have those things."

  "My baby will have everything it needs. Jaxon will have everything he needs, too. It might not look like the perfect situation to you, but it's going to work for me. I'll make it work."

  "If anyone can, it'll be you." He grinned at her suddenly and she felt the tension in the room dissipate.

  "I'm sorry for snapping at you. Can we put it down to hormones?"

  "Sure, that works for me. I...I care, I need you to know that."

  "I never doubted. I think you need to know that I can do this, on my own. Don't feel sorry for me, or my situation. I can handle it."
>
  "You shouldn't—"

  "Stop talking. Now." She smiled. "Before you say more stupid things."

  "Good plan." Rickard stepped closer and folded her into a hug. "Sleep well. I'll catch up with you soon." He pulled away.

  What had that look been? A flash of regret, sorrow? Was he grieving the loss of their potential relationship as well?

  There was no doubt in her mind after the last few days’ events that he was more suited to Sarai than her, but that didn't stop the twinge. She wasn't sure if she was comforted, or uncomfortable, that he seemed to share those emotions with her. He was out of bounds now, no matter what, so there was little point dwelling on it.

  Madea walked back into the lounge to check on Jaxon. He was still asleep, his mouth moving slightly, but she couldn't make out what he was saying. She grabbed a blanket from the chair and placed it over him, hoping that he wouldn't fall off in the night and hurt himself.

  She'd have to find somewhere else to live soon, or change the furniture around to make room for a bed. He couldn't sleep with her, and he couldn't sleep on the couch every night, though at least it would do for now.

  There was something about knowing he was safe that made the rest of the day bearable. She couldn't tell him about his grandfather. He'd lost too much already. No, she would find ways to build up his life, and together, they could welcome her baby. And things would be good.

  Unless of course there was something wrong with it. Something mad. Something Touched.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  The buzz at her door woke Madea. She raised her head slightly to check the time. Pre-dawn. Who in their right mind would be at her house this early? She shook the webs of sleep free and pulled herself out of bed, shuffling through her bedroom door and down the hallway.

  She thumbed the console and the door slid open. Sarai stood there, looking like she'd been awake for hours and was simply out for a morning stroll. The sunny smile plastered on her face was a good façade, but Madea could tell that it had been painted on.