“The entire night?”
Seriously. Why is she pushing this? Is she that dense?
“Yes. The entire night. I want to spend time with them, and it’s been a busy week. Right now, I’m in the mood to surround myself with family and quiet. The last thing I need is to be going to some office party.
“It’s just… I told my co-workers you’d be there,” she whines. “They’re going to wonder where you are, and it’s not like I can say that I forgot that you already had plans to see a baby!”
“Why would you tell them that I’d be there, then? And why can’t you tell them that?”
“Well, I figured…”
“That you’d be able to talk me into it?” I guess.
She at least has the decency to look slightly guilty. I watch as she shrugs her shoulders and flips her hair over her shoulder. “Maybe?” she says, trying for innocence.
“Another time. Maybe. Come on, Kennedy, don’t put words in my mouth, or commit me to your plans, okay? You know I don’t like plans.”
I’ve never been one to be comfortable promising I’ll be able to do anything. I don’t know why—it’s easier for me to leave my calendar open so I’m not at risk of disappointing someone if I don’t follow through with the plans. I’m sure a psychiatrist somewhere would have a field day, saying it all stems from Bri leaving me after I’d committed to her. But I’ve always been this way.
“I know, but it’s not like I’m asking you to commit to anything major. It’s just a party.”
“I don’t understand why you need me there, though.” Her persistence about this gives me an uneasy feeling, something I’ve never really had when it comes to Kennedy. Even in the very beginning when it was obvious she was looking for a relationship and I had to tell her I wasn’t interested in more, she was so understanding and calm about it that her actions right now seem like she’s done a one-eighty.
“It’s important to me, okay? Does there have to be a reason?”
“When you’re acting like this, yeah.” Because she seems desperate for me to be at this party, and I can’t figure out why. Surely there have been other work gatherings that she’s attended alone without so much as thinking of asking me to be there.
“Acting like what?” she snarks, childishly popping out a hip. Not in a cute way, either, like when Hazel does it, or even Harper.
It’s on the tip of my tongue to say what’s on my mind, but I think better of it.
It’s obvious to me she’s lying about something. Hiding the reason behind why she wants me at this party. What it is, I don’t know. It’s apparent she’s not going to admit to anything right now and, luckily, we’re interrupted when Drew calls my name from the middle of the field.
She looks his way and curls her lip like she’s pissed he interrupted our… fight, or whatever we are having. “I need to get back to work, okay? I’ll check in with you later,” I tell her, my hand lightly squeezing her shoulder before I turn and jog away, not waiting for a response. I’m aggravated and annoyed and probably need to get away before I say something I’ll regret.
With each step I take away from Kennedy, it’s easier to breathe. Which, oddly, makes that uneasy feeling of something going on with her from earlier rise to the surface once again. I’m not sure what to make of this new reaction to her.
I chance a glance at Bri to see her eyes are on me and wish I knew what she was thinking.
“Don’t leave without checking in with me first, yeah?” I yell to her, turning my body to walk backward so I can continue to see her.
She gives me a thumb’s up, and I chuckle, shaking my head before turning around once again and continue my way to Drew.
“What’s up?” I ask him when I get to him.
He’s looking down at his clipboard but doesn’t appear to really be looking at anything in particular.
“Everything okay?” I ask when he doesn’t answer me.
“Huh? Oh! Yeah. It’s all good. It uh, looked like you needed an excuse.”
I stare at him with my mouth gaped open. “Are we nineteen?”
“No, but by the looks of things, there was about to be a serious cat fight happening. Pretty sure they were both five seconds away from either pissing on your leg or ripping each other’s hair out.”
“Nah, it was fine,” I don’t even believe the words that just came out of my mouth.
“Right,” he says, barking out a laugh.
“You’re right. Dammit. I honestly don’t know what’s gotten into Kennedy, though. She’s never pushy like she was just now.”
“What do you mean?”
“She was acting pissy with me that I wouldn’t go to some work party with her tomorrow night.”
“That’s all she was mad about?”
“Hell if I know.”
He laughs, bending over at the waist. “Bet you didn’t think you’d be in the middle of some screwed up love triangle with your interviewer and friend,” he says, using air quotes when he says the word friend. “Speaking of, I told you that you had some explaining to do about Bri. I’m coming over for a beer tonight, and you’re gonna spill.”
“Oh, you are, are you?”
“Yup. After what I saw when I busted into your office on Monday, I expect the full story.”
I scrub a hand down my face and smile. I’m actually surprised he hasn’t asked about it already.
“All right, come on over. I’m only ordering pizza tonight, though.”
“Dinner, too? Lucky me.”
“Dipshit,” I joke and turn to see Bri sitting alone on the same chair she was seated in earlier when talking with Izaak. “See you at seven.”
“Can’t wait,” he says, and I know I hear laughter in his voice.
A light breeze blows through the practice field, and she tucks a piece of hair behind her ear. I had almost forgotten the obsession I had with her hair. It’s back, though, in full force. I catch the soft floral scent that always seemed to follow her and breathe it in deeply. Damn, she always smelled so good. Especially on her neck.
I’m so fucked when it comes to this girl. For six years, I put my feelings aside. Managed to keep them at bay, even when I saw pictures of her or heard the family talking about what she was up to.
There were those few months where I managed to lose it completely. When some asshole kept tagging her on social media, his arm always wrapped around her, or his lips attached to her cheek.
A quick look to my left tells me Kennedy left. Probably stormed off, more like it. But I’m grateful either way.
“How did today go? The boys answer all your questions?” I ask when I get close enough, taking Izaak’s vacated seat.
“They did. Izaak was the last on my list.”
I jerk back in my seat. They had figured on six weeks, but she’s already done with interviews in a week?
“Wow. Already, huh?”
“Well, we decided only to talk with the seniors because they know you the best, so as for talking with players, yeah. I’ve got what I need.”
I don’t want to ask if that means she’s going to leave soon. We need more time.
“Sorry, you’re not getting rid of me that quickly,” she giggles. “I still need to talk to a few of the other staff as well as some of your family members, but SI and the university both wanted me here for six weeks. They want the readers—your fans—to have the full experience. So yeah, I’m done with players’ interviews. But that means now you’re stuck with me by your side watching your every move.”
She lets that settle a bit. My heart does a little double tap in my chest, reminding me it’s still beating. Likely still for her.
“Do you have time this weekend to meet for coffee? I think… we need to get together, in person this time.” I tell her, rubbing the back of my neck. My eyes travel to her stomach of their own will and I feel like a jackass when she notices. She doesn’t move to cover the area, though. “I’m sorry, I’m having a really hard time wrapping my head around everything, and I think if you tell me
more about what happened, I’d feel a little better.”
“Of course, Grady. Anything you want to know.”
“Thank you, Bri. Will it be hard for you?” Of course it will be, dumbass. “I imagine it will be…”
“Grady,” she interrupts. “Relax. I’m still me. Yes, it still hurts to think about. But no, you don’t need to worry. I want you to know. You deserved to know six years ago, I’m not going to keep any of it from you any longer.”
She’s right—I should’ve been told six years ago. But, I can’t keep focusing on the past. Neither of us can. I need to move forward, and this new information is stopping me from doing that. Not that I was doing a great job of it in the first place.
“Thank you. I hate that you have to rehash all that you’ve been through, though.”
“Consider this part of my penance. If I had sucked it up years ago and told you, I wouldn’t have to be revisiting it now.”
“Can I ask one question?”
“You can ask as many as you want to.”
Oh, she has no idea what she’s offering.
“Why didn’t you?”
“Tell you right away?” I nod, and she continues, looking at the open sky around us. She shakes head. “The grief I felt was deep,” she says quietly, eyes focused on her lap. “Over the course of three weeks, my life was turned upside down not once, but four times. I wasn’t handling life well. You had the right to know, but I couldn’t put that grief on you. Not after what I did.”
There’s so much wrong with what she just said, I don’t know where to begin. For now, I recognize how hard it was for her to admit what she told me, and I don’t want to push anymore.
“Thank you, for giving me that piece of the puzzle.”
“You don’t need to thank me for giving you something that’s yours.”
Mine. Interesting.
Bri
“Hey, honey,” my mom’s sweet voice greets me after only one ring.
“Hey, Mom.”
She’s quiet for a beat. “What’s wrong?”
“Why do you ask if something’s wrong?”
“Because you’re my daughter, and I know your voices. Did the rest of the week not go well since we talked on Wednesday?”
“Well, that’s kind of annoying,” I joke.
“I bet it is, having a mom so smart.”
I roll my eyes.
“Tell me. How’s my favorite coach?”
“Ugh. You’re in a good mood,” I groan.
“Aren’t I always?” She really is. Especially after she got married to Andy. He’s a constant goofball so I’m sure that helps with her happiness.
“You are,” I murmur. “But dial it down a second, would you? I need to tell you something, and I can’t have you ready to start wearing your Team Grady shirt.”
“You have no faith in me. We won’t wear them yet. I’m not about to jinx it.”
“Mom! I was joking! You do not have Team Grady t-shirts!”
“Sure we do!”
In the background I hear Andy shout, “Should I get mine on now?”
I blink. What is this world I live in? I don’t understand.
“BTW, Hazel has two. One she wears to bed every night.”
I bark out a laugh. “Mom, you’re not supposed to say btw. You’re supposed to say ‘by the way’!”
“I don’t think that’s true. People say LOL all the time.”
She can’t be serious.
“No. They really don’t.”
“Yes. They do.”
I pinch the bridge of my nose. “Not in real life! Just in texts and stuff!”
“Well, how the heck am I supposed to differentiate the two?”
“Let me get this straight. You’ve been walking around town, selling coffee to people saying LOL, BTW and TBH?”
“I don’t walk around town selling coffee, Bri. I wait until they come into Dreamin’ Beans,” she scoffs like I’m the ridiculous one.
“And then you spout off weird acronyms?”
“They’re not weird. People use them all the time.”
“I don’t even know how to process this. I thought…”
She bursts out laughing and I hear her hand slap against what sounds like her leg. In the back ground I hear Andy’s deep chuckle. “What’s so funny?”
“You are. You’re so damn gullible. Of course I don’t say those out loud. I’m not a total moron.”
Thank goodness. “And the Team Grady shirts?”
“Oh, we have those.”
“Mom!”
Lord, give me the strength.
“What? They’re for us to wear to his first game! Not the way you think. Not everything is about you,” she teases.
“Ugh. I’m starting to regret that I called you.”
“Oh stop. I got you to relax and stop thinking about how Grady still gets your motor running for a split second.”
Did she just say… “My motor running? Mom! Are you drunk?”
“I will have you know, I did not day drink.”
“I’m not sure that makes me feel any better.”
“Fine. You big baby. I’ll be serious. How did the week go?”
“He’s an incredible coach,” I sigh, and it comes out embarrassingly dreamy, even though that’s not exactly what she asked.
“As we suspected,” she says in a light voice.
“Yeah, though, it’s different seeing it up close and personal, hearing it from the everyone, you know? He really is meant to coach. It’s so natural to him. And the players—they really love him. But more than that, they respect him. He doesn’t just bark orders, he listens and gets in the middle of the field. Tries to see firsthand what the guys are seeing on the field, so he knows what he needs to adjust. Every day he spends as much time with the players as he does working with his staff. I know everyone is going to be judging him for his age but truly, if they watch him for any amount of time, they’ll realize that his age has nothing to do with it. Southern Michigan State made the right choice giving him that job.”
She’s quiet on the other line before, “Exactly, how up close and personal?”
“Mom! That’s what you got out of what I just said?”
“Well, I kind of zoned out after a while because you kept talking.”
“You’re the one who asked!”
“No, I didn’t. I asked how your week went, not how Grady was as a coach. You’re the one who ran with that.”
She’s right. Dammit.
“Oh.”
“But I guess that answers the other question I had.”
“What’s that?”
“What it’s like being around him?”
I chew on my bottom lip, sitting on my small deck with a glass of wine, the early evening air already starting to cool down but still pleasant. Every morning while I’m having my first cup of coffee, my eyes stray to Grady’s backyard, already learning his schedule and that he has a cup of coffee on his patio every morning as well. Every evening, I wind down doing the same. I have yet to tell him I know where he lives. Or that I watch him like a creepy stalker.
“It’s… getting easier.”
“Bri,” her voice is sad.
“I told him.”
“About?”
I laugh humorlessly. It’s a good question.
“The baby.”
“Oh hon,” she sighs.
“Yeah.”
“Mom, I did it over the phone. Like an idiot. I don’t even know how, but it kind of spilled out of me. Not at all how I planned to tell him.”
“How’d he take it?”
“Definitely wasn’t pleased, both with hearing that I’d kept the secret and the way I told him. Flipped over his wooden patio table. He also busted a pot on his deck,” I tell her, remembering watching him lose it.
“He did what?”
“Well, here’s the other thing. Turns out, we’re neighbors. Our backyards are kind of neighbors.”
“You’re kidding.”
> “Not even a little bit.”
“Wow.”
“He doesn’t know I live here.”
“Or that you’ve been watching him all week long,” she guesses.
“Stop being creepy! How do you know things?”
“Me creepy? You’re the creepy one! Staring at him all week long, him not having a clue,” she teases.
“I don’t think I like talking to you today.”
“Oh don’t pout. Explain to me how he’s not seen you yet.”
“Well, I’m kind of around the corner a little bit and the deck has a railing. Since I’m usually sitting when I’m out here, it’s not as if he’s seen me walking around. And it’s not as bad as it sounds, I haven’t been slinking around hiding.”
“Still seems odd but it’s not important right now. Tell me, how are you doing after telling him? And when are you going to tell him the rest?”
“Relieved. And I’m not sure. We didn’t really get into all the details, so he wants to meet for coffee this weekend.”
“Just holler out over your yards and invite him over.”
“You’re such a brat today. Aren’t you like fifty years old or something? You’re supposed to grow up at some point.”
She gasps. “I am not fifty,” she whispers, but I hear Andy laughing in the background. Even though he couldn’t care less, she’s always been a little self-conscience of the fact that he’s six years younger than her. My laughter joins in with Andy’s when I hear her whap him playfully followed by giggling which tells me he’s tickling her or something equally as intimate. Gag.
“On that note, I also may or may not have accidentally kissed him.”
“What?” she asks, no laughter or teasing in her voice. “You kissed him!” She shouts.
“Put it on speaker!” Andy’s voice barks.
I roll my eyes. Again. Because I’m not even the least bit surprised. He and my mom might not have gotten together until I was already eighteen, but he’s been the best stepdad I could ever ask for. In fact, he never felt like a step parent at all. It was as if our families were always meant to be blended. Our two families became one so seamlessly, it’s hard to remember a time when we weren’t one.
“Hey Bri,” Andy says after she clicks her phone over to speaker.
“Seriously?”
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