Christmas is in the Air

by Cary Morgan-Frates

  “You look as nervous as a girl going to her first prom. Who is this guy?” her sister, Carla, asked as she took a sip of her hot chocolate. She reached into her purse and drew out a small flask. “Do you want some peppermint schnapps to go with your cocoa?”

  Hanna shook her head.

  “You sure? It might calm your nerves a bit. You look like you need a Valium drip, or a patch or whatever it comes in, to calm yourself down. You didn’t tell me this was a ‘guy’ evening, I thought it was a ‘dog’ evening.”

  “I never said it was a ‘guy’ evening.” Hanna glared at her sister. “You said that you were sitting home, bored. I thought you might enjoy ice skating.”

  Carla dramatically gestured to her high-heeled boots. “When have you ever seen me engage in sports? You were the one who liked to hike and canoe, not me. But, you’re right. Being here is more fun than sitting home in our little apartment watching reality TV.” She sighed and propped her chin in her hands. “I’m sad that I don’t have a life.”

  A deep voice behind them asked, “Hanna?”

  She and Carla turned at the same time to find Julian with Gabe in his arms. They both wore gray wool coats, but it looked much better on the older of the Barrows.

  “I knew it!” Carla said in a loud whisper, as she elbowed her, making her take a step to the side.

  Gabe bounced in his dad’s arms. “I’ve always wanted to go ice skating! Where’s Cody? Is he going to go out on the ice too?”

  Hanna laughed and pointed. “No, he’s over there where all the kids are gathered.”

  “Can I go and see him?” Gabe asked, as excitement tinged his words.

  “Ask your dad.”

  “You can see Cody,” Julian said as he set him down. “Just stay where I can see you.” The boy ran off to meet the others. Julian extended his hand to Carla. “I’m Julian.”

  Carla took his hand. “Why yes you are.” She wiggled her eyebrows at Hanna.

  “Were you afraid I wasn’t going to show and you’d be stuck by yourself all night?” Julian grinned at Hanna. “Or is she your wingman?”

  “No, she’s not my wingman; she’s my sister, Carla. She begged me to get out of the house, so I brought her along.” Hanna shot a look at her sister hoping she wouldn’t contest the little white lie she’d just told. Instead, her sister held a sly smile. Oh, she was going to have to do some major paybacks for this later.

  “So, Julian,” Carla began. “What brings you out tonight?”

  “Hanna told me that she was helping tonight at a fundraiser and that I should come and check it out.”

  “Are you a donor?” she asked.

  “No,” Julian paused. “I think that one of Hanna’s trained seizure dogs could be a big asset to my son, Gabe.”

  “Oh…” Carla looked over at the boy. “Your kid has seizures? Well, hey. It was nice to meet you, Julian. I think I’m going to get more hot chocolate. I think mine’s getting cold.” She trotted off in the direction of the refreshment stand.

  “Did I say something wrong?” Julian asked as he turned back to face Hanna.

  “No.” Hanna blew some warmth on her hands and rubbed them together. “She knows what I do, and that I work with people with special needs. She never seems to know what to say or do; she detaches herself from anything too deep in her life.”

  “What about you?” he asked. “I know you train dogs, but what about the people who have special needs family members? Is it simply a job to you?”

  “No, I care about the people. You’re not the only one with family concerns. Carla and I had a pretty hard upbringing, but we handle things differently.”

  He watched her for a long moment. “I came here tonight to have some fun. If you’ll go out on the ice with me, I think it will bring up my nerve to take Gabe out. It would mean the world to him.”

  “I don’t know.” She bit her lip.

  “I’ll rent all the skates and I promise that I’ll let you land on me if you fall.”

  His casual smile made her say, “Yes.”

  ****

  Julian went to the skate rental window. Hanna said she would be back in a few minutes. She needed to ask her sister to keep an eye on Cody. He was one popular dog that evening.

  He spotted the family raising money; he recognized them from their picture on the front door as he came in. An elderly lady stood next to a table with a large box with a slit in the top for donations. Opening his wallet, Julian smiled, as he pushed the money into the box.

  “Thanks,” she said with a warm smile. “The dog is for my granddaughter. Are you friends with my son?”

  “No. I don’t know them, but my son also has seizures.”

  “Are you part of the support organization?”

  “No, I’m not.”

  “I can’t believe how generous people can be that don’t know each other but have a common thread. I’m so happy to see such a great turn out for Abigail tonight.”

  Julian didn’t know there was a support organization. He’d have to look them up. That was his fault. He knew he always thought he could do everything on his own. But it would sure be nice to talk with others who struggled with the same things he and Gabe did.

  Hanna came up behind him. “I see you’ve met Mrs. Halifan. She’s the one who told us that Abigail needs a dog. Now, it’s all coming together for her.”

  “I’m glad for them,” he said as he followed her to the bench where they laced up their skates. He took her hand as they entered the rink.

  “I haven’t skated since I was thirteen,” Julian confessed. “I was on a local hockey rec league. But when I got my two front teeth knocked out with a puck, vanity won out over playing the sport and I quit. I liked my nose where it was, and I was never very good at hockey.” He let the feel of the ice under his skates come back to memory. White Christmas started to play over the speakers. “Hey, they’re playing our song. Can I have this dance, Ms. Acker?”

  “We don’t have a song.” Heat flushed her already pink cheeks. “If you think you can’t skate, I’m ten times worse. I’m doing good just to stay on my feet.”

  “Then it’s a good thing I’m here to hold onto.” Skating backwards, he wound an arm around her waist and looked down into her beautiful face.

  She blew her bangs out of her eyes, and concentrated on the ice in front of her. She looked serious… and adorable.

  “Listen to the music. Stop worrying about your feet. They’ll do what your brain wants,” he said.

  “When I was young, I fell on a girl while we were roller-skating. I thought I broke her hand.”

  Julian tipped her chin up with his thumb. “I’m going to skate backwards in front of you and hold your hands. You can follow me. I won’t let you fall.”

  “Show-off,” she said, but smiled.

  “Well if you don’t need me, I’ll let go.”

  “No!” she said and grabbed for his hands. “You are the best skater ever. Don’t let go or I’ll fall on my butt.”

  “That’s more like it.” As he guided her around the oval rink, he knew she fell into the rhythm, getting the hang of it. He came back to her side and put an arm around her waist again. She was warm and soft. Not being too noticeable, he dipped his head and breathed in the floral scent of her hair. Man, she smelled good. As they moved around the rink, Julian waved at Gabe who watched them from the edge.

  When the song ended, they left the ice and joined Gabe. Julian helped put on his skates and then followed the same patient steps he’d taken with Hanna. Julian looked over at Hanna taking a photo of them with her cell phone. He grabbed Gabe by the wrists and spun him off the ice and then around in a circle. Gabe’s giggle turned into a full-blown laugh.

  After several more turns around the rink, he could tell Gabe was tired and needed to get to bed soon. Julian agreed to let him pet Cody one last time, and then he stopped next to Hanna.

  “The Halifan family is great and they are close to getting a dog,” Hanna said. “Probably after the fir
st of the year.”

  “Are they the ones who are getting Cody?” Julian asked.

  “No. Their dog is coming from another trainer. We haven’t decided yet about Cody.”

  “I see. Well, thanks for inviting us tonight. I’ve had the most fun I’ve had in months… maybe longer. Can I still take you out for those waffles?”

  She looked up at the large clock over the rink. “It’s getting late and Gabe needs to go to school in the morning. I’ll take a rain check.”

  “I was wondering if maybe you would use that rain check and go out with me tomorrow night. We could have a real date.” Nerves made him swallow. He was out of the ‘dating loop’ thing. “My sister said that she’d babysit, and I thought we could go see a movie and get popcorn?”

  “I’d like that,” she said as she pulled on her other white glove.

  “Great. Could you be at my place by six? Or I can pick you up.” Julian couldn’t stop looking at her pink lips. He wanted to kiss her goodnight, but that would lead to a million questions from Gabe. He clenched his fists, and pulled his gaze higher to meet her eyes.

  “I’ll come there. Can I bring Cody to play with Gabe? Would your sister mind?”

  “She loves dogs. She has three -. See you then.”

  Chapter Five

  Hanna walked with a bounce in her step the whole day. Julian was the first guy in a long time that she wouldn’t mind seeing on a regular basis. Even daily… or hourly. She grinned to herself.

  When the evening finally came, she’d settled on a gray sweater, jeans and boots, a good “going to the movies” outfit.

  Hanna rang the doorbell and waited. Gabe whipped the door open and Cody ran in before her. Gabe dropped to his knees and Cody licked him with a happy hello.

  Julian called from the back room, “Be there in a minute.” He came out tucking a long-sleeved Henley T-shirt into his jeans. “It has been one of those days. I’ll be ready as soon as I put on some shoes and my sister gets here.”

  His cell phone rang and he scooped it off the counter. “Hello?” Julian paused as he listened to the person on the other end. “You’re kidding me. What do you mean the poinsettias for the party didn’t arrive? I called the warehouse myself this morning. Okay… I’ll call you back in a few minutes.” Before he could put the phone back on the counter, it rang again in his hand. He looked at the number and frowned. “Hey, Becky… no… really? I just got called into a work emergency. You sure you can’t— Okay. Take care of yourself. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

  When he ended the call, Julian closed his eyes and tapped the phone to his forehead.

  “You weren’t kidding that it’s been one of those days,” Hanna said as she watched worry etch his brow.

  “The first call was one of my workers telling me a delivery’s at the warehouse and it needs to be picked up tonight or the warehouse will cancel the hold. The second was my sister telling me that she has the flu and can’t come and watch Gabe.”

  “No worries. Cody and I can watch him.”

  Julian’s frown deepened. “You came over to go on a date, not to be a babysitter.”

  “That was the original plan. But plans change. Really, I don’t mind. It’ll be fun.”

  “I can take Gabe with me.”

  “Don’t be silly. He’d have much more fun here with me and Cody. You know that. But I do have one important request.”

  “Anything.”

  “I can live without the movie, there isn’t anything playing right now that I want to see. But, all day I’ve really been craving the popcorn you promised me.”

  “There are microwave popcorn packets in the cupboard over the refrigerator. Help yourself. You’re totally sure?” He rolled his eyes at the ceiling. “I’ll keep my phone with me.” His eyes darted to Gabe. “In case you need to call me.”

  “We have Cody, remember, and if anything happens you’ll be the first I call. Now don’t worry and get that lady her flowers before her head blows off.” She made a kaboom motion on the sides of her head with her hands.

  “Yeah… that’s what will happen for sure. Thanks.” Julian went over and told Gabe of the plans. He smiled as his son kissed him goodnight on the cheek. He put on his coat and then said to Hanna, “It should only be an hour or two.”

  “Let’s get that popcorn going. I’m starving,” Hanna said to Gabe. Moving out into the kitchen she opened the cupboards until she found the packs. Julian looked at them side by side and wondered what it would be like to have her there with the two of them on a more permanent basis. Had Hanna ever thought of having children? Gabe was so happy when she was around, it was like the two were meant to be together.

  ****

  Julian made three calls to his home, but it didn’t make matters any easier. He was held up for hours— first at the flower warehouse and then at Mrs. Callens’s. She had them move the poinsettias at least ten times at her front entryway until she was finally happy with their arrangement.

  Julian’s head was now officially ready to blow off, not Mrs. Callens’s. A headache pounded his temple.

  When he finally pulled into the garage, he glanced at the clock on the dashboard and then swore under his breath.

  When he opened the door, he stopped in the doorway and took in the peaceful site. Gabe slept with his head in Hanna’s lap and Cody wound around Gabe’s feet. When Hanna spotted him, she put her finger to her lips in a hush sign.

  “Please don’t kill me,” he whispered.

  “It’s been a great evening.”

  “Really?”

  “I love spending time with Gabe.”

  Julian scooped his son into his arms, put on the boy’s pajamas and tucked him into bed. He kissed his forehead and turned on the revolving circus nightlight.

  “The least I can do is offering you a glass of wine and another apology.”

  “Sometimes things happen and you need other’s help.”

  “That’s not my long suit— asking for help, that is. But I can’t thank you enough, you saved my butt.” He uncorked the wine and poured them each a glass. Julian joined her back on the couch and kicked off his shoes. “What did you guys do?”

  “I got the popcorn you promised. Gabe helped me divide the bags out and showed me where you keep the butter. Then we watched Miracle on 34th Street. It’s been years since I’ve seen it all the way through.”

  “He loves that old movie and wants to watch it over and over again. I’m not sure why.”

  “I do. It’s a great story about belief. After we finished the movie, he went into his room and brought out paper and colored pencils. Gabe said that he wanted to write a letter to Santa.” She leaned forward, took a sheet of paper off the end table and handed it to him. “I told him you’d drop the letter in the mail tomorrow.”

  Julian looked at the paper and read what Gabe wrote.

  Dear Santa,

  I really love Cody. He’s a dog and my new best friend. I think he loves me too. If he lived here with us, my daddy wouldn’t worry so much about me.

  He’s all I want for Christmas.

  I will see you in a week and I’ll make sure that there are all your favorite cookies. Oh, and milk.

  Love Gabe.

  “You know how hard it was not to cry when I read this?” Hanna sniffed, tears threatening to spill out.

  “I can’t get Gabe’s hopes up. You said Cody’s taken by someone else and I can’t have his heart broken more than it’s already been.”

  “Nothing for sure yet with Cody. What do you mean his heart’s been broken?”

  “Gabe’s mom.” Julian took a deep drink of wine and let the fruity liquid slide down his throat. “She makes promises—when we hear from her—but then never follows through. We haven’t seen her in a few years, but when she left the last time, she said that she’d come for the holidays. That’s what Gabe remembers. But here it’s another Christmas and I’m the one left to explain to my son why his mom doesn’t care enough to show up when she said she would. Even for
Christmas.”

  “Sometimes life’s tough.” Hanna laid her hand on his. “I’ve had hard times too. I raised my sister. My mom… well, she drank. A lot. We were never taken by CPS, but came close many times. I know how you feel, I really do. Like the weight of the world is on your shoulders and there is no one who knows how it feels.”

  “But you do.” He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “When Gabe began to have seizures, she left. I had no idea what I was doing. I still feel like I don’t half the time.”

  “I can see how happy Gabe is. You’re a great dad.”

  He looked down in his glass for a long moment before he set it on the table. “You know how much it means to hear someone say that?”

  “What does it mean?”

  “Everything.” He scooted closer and tipped her chin until their eyes met. “You’re someone special, Hanna Acker. You need to know that and right now I want to kiss you.”

  “I’d like that.”

  “Those are the best words I’ve heard all day.” His mouth lowered to hers and their lips met. Her lips were warm and tasted sweet from the wine. He rejoiced in the feel of their kiss… and from the shock waves of their chemistry. It was so long since Julian felt these sensations that everything seemed fresh, new and exciting.

  “Definitely the best thing about the day,” she whispered as she raised her head and looked into his eyes. Hanna curled her hand around his neck and pulled his lips down on hers, hard.

  He pulled her against him and smoothed his hands down her back. Oh how he’d missed this connection. He was sure intimacy between them would be electric, but there had to be more. This. This warm feeling that things were right, and that she was the woman who should be in his arms.

  When the kiss finally ended, she said, her voice breathless, “I’d better go, or I might not.”

  “I could live with that.” He wanted her to stay and be his. He’d buried his sensual feelings deep and for such a long time, Julian wanted to remember what it felt like to be a man with needs and desires. He spent every day as ‘dad.’-