Pulse

by Danielle Koste

  “Trigger happy, sarcastic, and a thrill junkie. And I thought I wasn’t going to like you,” Lyall said, following behind Rowan as they walked passed, into the ECBS.

  “I’m going to take that as a compliment.” Cameron shot back.

  Rowan couldn’t help her smile growing, the two boys’ playful bickering bringing her a moment of joy. It wasn’t often Cameron approved of people, and she got the feeling that the sentiment went the same for Lyall. It was an interesting experience bearing witness to their banter.

  The fun was cut short as they approached the elevators, and she raised a finger to her mouth to quiet them. As she listened, her expression became confused. “The elevators are running.”

  “Do you think someone’s downstairs?” Cameron asked.

  She shook her head. “I don’t know. Possibly…”

  “So we should be careful, then,” Lyall said, stepping towards the elevator and calling it with the button.

  Cameron glanced at Rowan again as they listened. “It’s coming up from downstairs.”

  “Someone’s here.” She nodded, catching his conclusion as the two of them followed Lyall into the empty elevator.

  Rowan pulled out Phelps’ key card again, along with a set of codes to reset the security system that Phelps had given her before they’d left, since he suspected she would have trouble getting back into the labs with the card’s previous access if Miller wanted to keep her out for any reason. His suspicions had been spot on, the elevator requiring his reset codes before it would let Rowan go anywhere.

  With the restrictions reset, she selected the underground floor, and the door closed on them, the elevator descending. Preparing for whoever was in the labs, Cameron held his gun up and aimed it for the elevator door. His paranoia rubbed off on Lyall as well; when the elevator chimed for its destination, he grabbed Rowan’s arm, taking a step in front of her in a protective gesture.

  She peered around him, out the elevator doors and down the stark, empty hallway. No one was there. Or at least, no one they could see.

  Then she heard something. Beyond the sound of Cameron and Lyall’s breathing, passed her own heart racing in her chest, there was something else. Tapping, like someone drumming their nails on a table as they sat and waited. It sounded like it was far away, but also like someone had taken the sound and thrown it at her. As she heard it, her mind focused in, and the noise became louder and louder until it felt like it was right there in the elevator with them.

  Cameron stepped to move out into the hall, but Rowan stopped him. “Do you hear that?”

  Both boys turned to her. Lyall was surprised, and with his surprise came Rowan’s confusion.

  “You don’t hear that?” she asked, and Lyall became more bewildered, shaking his head. Had he lost so much of his abilities now, that he couldn’t even hear what her human ears were hearing? He did look just about dead, after all.

  She huffed and stepped forward to take Cameron’s gun from his hands and lead the movement. She walked as lightly and carefully as she could, and the boys followed her example, making it easier for her to hear the tapping she led them towards.

  Finally, she reached the door to the research labs, knowing that the sound was coming from inside. She used the keypad, and just like the elevator, it accepted her input without a key card. The door opened, and she entered cautiously, the two boys flanking her sides.

  The room was dark at first, but her eyes adjusted quickly, perhaps more quickly than usual. It was like someone had bumped up the contrast, the darks were darker, but the lights were more defined. She still couldn’t see well, but in the blackness of the room, she could make out the shape of a person: a tall, lean frame, and the gleam of rimless lenses.

  “Dr. Miller.”

  “Good evening, Miss Platts. You’re out late.”

  Lyall had never been one for conversation. In a characteristic reaction, he disappeared from Rowan’s side, intent on eliminating the threat before the threat got an upper hand.

  “Stop,” Rowan said just as Lyall reached the woman, predicting exactly what he would do. He pulled back and looked at her, his hands on either side of Miller’s head, ready to snap her neck.

  “I don’t need your permission,” he growled after a moment, turning back to the woman between his palms. Miller stared with terror, but otherwise did not move in Lyall’s grip, perhaps suspecting that attempting an escape would end worse for her.

  “You said you didn’t want to kill anymore.” Rowan reminded him, and watched as Lyall struggled for a moment before admitting defeat, moving his hands instead to Miller’s collar and dragging her over.

  “What are you doing here, doctor?” Rowan kept the gun up in front of her, but lowered it just a little to speak over the barrel.

  Lyall shoved Miller towards her, and when the woman found her balance again on her heels, she cleared her voice, smoothed her messed hair. “I could ask you the same question. The others were afraid to continue the research, at least for now. I decided to stay.” She glared momentarily, but when she glanced at Lyall, the sour expression stretched to a smirk. “From the looks of it, you got the dose of my antivirus after all.”

  “If you want to give your explanation, here’s your chance. Why did you lie to me? If you planned on killing Lyall all along, why bother stringing me into it, making me think I was helping him.” Rowan spat venom, feeling powerful with a gun in her hands and two males there to back her up. It didn’t hurt that one of those males was also somewhat superhuman.

  Miller sighed heavily, rubbing her temple under her glasses. “The subject was a liability, and you knew that. Even if we did cure him, he wasn’t going to let us treat him as a human, either, and then he would have died anyway. It’s easier and sounds nicer on the reports when someone infected dies, rather than when someone who was cured dies.”

  She seemed like she realized it sounded bad, but also didn’t care much about it. When she continued, she forced herself to take on a more sympathetic tone. “And the reason I lied to you, was because I wanted you on my side. I admired your determination, I still do, although I wish it was focused on the same goals. I see so much of myself in you, Rowan. You could go so far, we could… together.”

  Rowan narrowed her eyes, anger boiling in her chest. “I admired you as well, doctor. I did everything I could to please you. I risked my life for this project. But when I asked you to help me do something I felt was right, was just, you didn’t trust my judgement. Even though it was my judgement that forged this project to begin with.”

  Miller blinked, discomfort filtering into her gaze as she forced a smile. “Perhaps you're right. Imagine if we could go back and change our decisions.”

  “Yes. Imagine.” A suspicion twisted in her gut, but Rowan ignored it, lowering her gun a little more. Miller’s words had a point. If she had the foresight to know what would happen by making the decision to join this project, would she have reconsidered? She’d already asked herself that so many times, coming up with a fairly easy answer. Now though, she couldn’t imagine not having met Lyall, so much so that she was going to extreme lengths to save him. Would she give that up for the chance to avoid this altogether?

  “Is there something I can do, to make this all up to you?” Miller asked after the silence dwelled for a moment too long.

  Rowan raised the gun again, her suspicion making her feel unsettled again, but paused to consider her offer. “We’re here for the virus. Phelps said it might be the best chance we have at saving Lyall from whatever you gave him.”

  Miller offered another stiff look, the expression in her eyes changing briefly. “You went to Phelps?”

  “He helped me with my wound and was the one who told us about your antivirus not really being an antivirus.” Rowan grinned a little as she considered an additional comment. “He said you’ve never been very good with cures.”

  Miller’s fake smile soured a little, her eyes burning in annoyance. “He’s also always been more compassionate. So m
uch so it’s been a detriment to himself.” The jab was unnecessary, but it seemed to smooth Miller’s upset, allowing her to continue. “You said you needed the virus? Phelps was correct, giving the subject a new dose of the original virus cells should counteract the effect of my substance. It might take a little while, but within a few days, the cell damage should be regenerated.”

  Rowan nodded. “If you let us have the virus, we’ll leave, and you’ll never see any of us again. I don’t care what you do with the project after this. I won’t interfere any longer. We’ll be even.”

  Miller smiled briefly. “Very well, but it’s hard to consider this a proper terms of agreement when you have a gun aimed at me.”

  Considering her point, Rowan glanced at Lyall and Cameron. Neither of them gave her anything to work on, so she looked back to Miller. What harm was there, just putting the gun down? Besides, if she tried anything, Lyall could always intervene.

  Rowan lowered the weapon, putting the safety back on and handing it to Cameron, who returned it to the back of his jeans.

  Satisfied, Miller’s smile grew. “Let me put the sample in a syringe for you.” She walked away to the other side of the room to retrieve it from the refrigerated storage.

  Rowan had a moment of relief, glad that the whole thing was going so smoothly and that Miller seemed to have a phantom of a conscious erupting. She grinned when she caught Lyall’s gaze.

  “It feels like I’m long overdue to meet death, and I’m cheating it again,” Lyall explained, forcing a sly look that was less than genuine.

  Cameron was there immediately to offer his particular brand of reassurance. “Oh, get over yourself. No one wants to die. Everyone would do whatever it takes to stay alive another day, even turn themselves back into a monster.”

  Rowan backed up his statement. “It doesn’t have to be permanent. With Phelps’ help, we can find a real cure this time, if that’s what you still want. It’s just for now.”

  Lyall’s gaze softened a little, considering her words, then nodding. “But just for now.”

  Caught up in the brief moment of positivity, the bright, cold blue of his eyes kept Rowan’s gaze preoccupied for longer than she had meant to be, and her distraction was broken by Cameron pulling his gun out again.

  It was too late, though. Even with Lyall reacting immediately, pinning Miller to a wall, the deed had already been done. An empty syringe hit the floor and Miller’s arm bled where she had inserted it, laughing as Lyall choked her.

  “Shut up! I’ll crush your skull with my bare hands.” Lyall’s threats did nothing, and the reason for Miller’s sudden confidence showed itself before Lyall was able to follow through.

  Miller grabbed Lyall around the wrist and twisted, forcing Lyall to the ground to keep his arm from breaking. He yelled in pain, then groaned as she kicked him further to the floor.

  “I see now why you wanted to keep this virus all to yourself.” Miller paused to spread her fingers of the arm she injected the virus into, the veins in her wrist going dark as the new blood spread. “Why would anyone want to share this?”

  Cameron fired his gun at Miller, pulling the trigger until it clicked empty, but Miller was already as fast as Lyall, faster maybe, and dodging bullets was child’s play. Cameron’s assault garnered nothing more than a laugh from her as she approached from the other side of the room.

  “You know, I really wanted to use the virus to benefit people when I found out what it could do, but now that I have it, I’m wondering myself why I should let others in on the fun. No one is really worth this power, anyway. If everyone has it, then it’s not very special anymore, is it?”

  Rowan stood and stared, defenseless and very human compared to the approaching creature. Cameron tried to step in front of her, but he was shoved aside, hitting the other wall hard. Rowan cried out his name, turning to see if he was okay, but Miller grabbed her by the throat, forcing their gaze to meet.

  “I really wanted to share this moment with you. We could have done so much together.” Over the doctor’s shoulder, Rowan saw Lyall trying to pick himself up off the floor. Giving a cruel grin in response to her concerned gaze, Miller added, “It was the virus you should have been infatuated with, not the host.”

  Rowan barely saw Lyall attack from behind, a fire extinguisher in his hands, hitting Miller across the back with it. Miller stumbled, tossing Rowan to the ground and twisting quick on Lyall to retaliate.

  Even though Lyall was slower, he dodged Miller’s attacks smoothly, until he was backed against a wall again. Nowhere to dodge anymore, she loomed over him and smiled, priming herself for an attack at his throat.

  “Cameron, no!” Rowan yelled, because she knew he couldn’t do anything, but it was too late. It happened too fast for her to stop it. He was already there, swinging his hand down to hit Miller with the butt of his pistol to help Lyall.

  Miller swung around when Rowan shouted, snatching Cameron by his throat and throwing him against the ground. She heard him yell; then the yell stopped short, and her heart follow suit. In the moment between beats, she knew what happened, but refused to believe it. She inhaled, sharp and fast, and her heart pounded again, something waking up inside her. Something hungry.

  It was like the monster that she had peacefully put to bed rose raging, filling her veins with an uncontrollable wildness that possessed her. Tears flooded her eyes, and the pounding of her heart was loud and deafening in her ears, but she didn’t need to see or hear. The monster acted for her, and the monster saw only red.

  She lunged across the room, tackling Miller’s back and forcing her away from Cameron. Miller stumbled and flailed around, trying to get her off, but Rowan dug her nails into the other woman and held on tight, tearing at the skin of her eyes and face.

  The doctor fell back, slamming Rowan between herself and a wall, then turned to deal with her. Rowan lunged again, barely winded from the hit. Miller stumbled on her heels, falling back onto a table, and Rowan straddled her torso, grabbed her by the hair, and began slamming her head against the table.

  She didn’t know how she was doing it, but she had overpowered the newly made monster, forcing her head against the tabletop over and over and over until…

  “Rowan, stop!” Lyall’s voice broke through the red somehow, and she paused. He was a blur past the tears, but she could tell by the way he stood there frozen, he was scared of something.

  In the second she stopped, Miller threw her off, and Rowan hit the wall hard. Before she could even get her wind back, Miller disappeared.

  Lyall ran over to help her up, but she threw her arms at him, her head still filled with rage. “I had her! Lyall, I had her, and you stopped me! Why?”

  He broke through Rowan’s anger by grabbing her face and forcing her to look him in the eye despite her struggle to push him away. “You don’t want to be a killer,” he said when she finally gave him her gaze, wiping at the fat, frustrated tears falling down her cheeks.

  As quickly as the anger passed, the pain fell into place, and she remembered why her heart ached. “Cameron.”

  She pushed away from Lyall and searched for him in a panic, finding where he laid and scrambling on her hands and knees over to the body. She held back a scream as her palms came into contact with the blood on the floor.

  “No.” She shook her head and collapsed onto him, listening for a heartbeat. All she could hear was her own, pounding harder and harder in her skull. She wouldn’t believe it. She couldn’t. It wasn’t true.

  The sobs wracked her body as she gazed up and saw the wound on his neck, a wide, bloody hole tore through his skin and muscle. Her hands trembled as she reached out to touch his face, as if it might help, but all it did was leave bloody fingerprints on his cheeks and lips and eyelids. Her mouth trembled and she leaned down to kiss his chest, trying to will life into his body again.

  It felt like her chest was ripping apart, like her throat was tearing open, like she would cry until her lungs stopped working. Everything hurt. S
he buried her face into his chest and breathed deep his smell one more time, hoping for some sort of comfort in the action, but with the inhale came the sharp, metallic scent of the blood that covered the both of them.

  Still, something about the deep breath calmed her. The sobs slowed, her shaking settled, the pain in her chest numbed. She took another long inhale of his scent, and the smell of blood filled her nose again, sweeter this time. Rowan closed her eyes against the tears, sighing. One more inhale, one more, and she could leave and be ok, she told herself.

  She breathed in, and her head felt more clear. When she opened her eyes the room was less dark. Her hands, gripped around Cameron’s shirt, had stopped trembling. Was this what shock was like? Whatever it was, Rowan was thankful for it, because the pain disappeared and she could only smell him, the fresh cedar and peppermint of his aftershave with the hot, sharp smell of his blood.

  Rowan looked back at the wound on his neck, and this time, she wasn’t able to pull away. Locked onto the sight of the flesh and blood, it felt like her vision vibrated, like the shutter of a broken camera, trembling in and out, burning contrast. She exhaled a shallow breath.

  Lyall’s hand covered her eyes, and he pulled her face into his chest, picking her up in his arms and taking her away from the body. She wanted to object, she reached a hand out, but words failed her. Instead, she buried her face into Lyall’s collar and let the hurt fill her again until it felt like her body would cave in on itself.

  He brought her out to the car, put her in the passenger seat, then got into the driver’s side. She didn’t think about asking whether or not he could drive. She didn’t think about anything. Just Cameron’s mangled body, and the blood, all the blood. It was still on her hands, she could smell it as she wiped her eyes. It made her mouth water.

  When Lyall got on the road, he leaned over and opened her window. The cool night air hit her hard in the face and chilled her lungs when she breathed. She realized then that she was sweating, and the air broke the heat like an ice bath broke a fever.