by Love, Lust
“Just find me the fucking TV!”
“It’s behind those panels. What the hell is going on?”
Darius pointed to a subtle raised panel to the side of the fireplace. Ashley made her way over there, slid her hand along the crevice until she found the latch, then pulled back the panel to reveal a large flat screen television.
“Princess. Don’t.”
She looked back over her shoulder at Johnny, but there was no way in hell she wasn’t going to turn on the set. She told him sorry with her eyes and went right back to her mission.
“Here.”
She turned to find Darius standing beside her with the remote.
“I’m assuming your gonna want E. It’s channel sixty-four.”
She took the remote, equal amounts of fear and gratitude pulsing through her veins.
“Thank you.”
“We’re in this together, Ashley, no matter what it is.”
She took his hand. The words coming of his lips were so foreign, she wasn’t even sure if he meant it, but right now…she pushed the power button on the remote.
Chapter 11
It only took a second before her face appeared on the screen staring back at her. It took another minute for her equilibrium to catch up with what they said. It wasn’t pretty.
Words like sex tape, pornography, adultery, and sex addict were being thrown at her like sharp knives. She felt her knees give out and Darius’ arms reach around to support her.
In the mad swirl, she heard Darius on his cell phone at the same time alerting the staff to the coming sea of reporters both in person and on the phone.
It was a surreal moment like she’d never before experienced. Lost inside herself, she couldn’t quite connect with anything. A part of her was very sure this absolutely had to be a joke. First of all, if she’d never had sex before, how could there possibly be a sex tape, and second, who would be so cruel as to leak something like that if it did exist?
She wasn’t stupid. She knew the business—someone had done this to her. The question was who?
“Come on, sweetheart.” Darius led her back to the chaise. “Sit.”
When she did, he tipped her head back until her gaze was forced off the television and on him. He had a cell phone to his ear. She heard another ringing in his pocket.
“I’m turning it off. You’re on overload. We need to take this one step at a time, but Ashley, I’m promising you, we will get through this.”
She nodded, not sure if she had nothing to say, or just couldn’t control her words yet.
Darius waved to Johnny, who came over immediately. Darius then answered the second phone and moved to turn off the television. She was being managed again and though part of her hated it, part of her believed she wasn’t strong enough to handle this.
She had no idea for how long she sat there, all sorts of thoughts churning in her mind. In twenty years, there’d never been any real scandal attached to her name. She’d seen a lot of others felled by something like this, but Myra, Morey, and Gabe had been like ferocious guard dogs both for her body and her reputation.
“I, ah…” She stood from the chaise. “I need to go out.”
She turned to leave the room, Johnny of course right behind her, but it was Darius who grabbed her arm, stopping her.
“Sweetheart, you can’t go anywhere right now. There is a sea of reporters at the gate already and they’ll stay on your every step wherever you go. You’ll be safe in here.”
She looked at him as if she’d never really seen him before.
“You’re right. I’ll, uh, go lie down. Stay out of the way.”
He rubbed both her arms.
“That’s probably for the best. Let me get a handle on this, and then we’ll decide what to do. Okay?”
“Sure.”
She smiled, but when he kissed her forehead this time, it felt oddly detached.
She turned and left the room, Johnny directly behind her. They’d had a long-standing agreement—she wouldn’t ever sneak out on him and he wouldn’t ever tell her she couldn’t do something. It worked and she was about to enact it.
In the foyer, she headed for the garages instead of upstairs.
“So where exactly are we going, princess?”
She turned, feeling a lot more composed now.
“Morey’s.”
* * * *
Darius wasn’t sure there had been a time where he’d been more furious, or so frustrated.
As Ashley’s publicist, he needed to spring into action the second the news broke, but as her boyfriend, as he watched her leave the room with Johnny, all he wanted to do was just hold her until this went away.
It hadn’t escaped him either, that had he not been so distracted by her in general, wanting to spend every waking moment with her, he would have been on top of this from the beginning and Ashley wouldn’t have found out the way she did.
The first thing he did was check his cell. Sure enough, there had been seventeen emergency messages from Karen, but he’d had everything on hold so he could spend the morning in bed with Ashley. He deserved to be fired for this, but he would make it up to her…somehow.
He’d given Karen brief instructions, but until he knew exactly what they were dealing with, he wouldn’t be able to make a competent plan of defense.
It took a half second to find it. All he had to do was Google Ashley’s name and there it was.
He clicked the top link and was taken to a website offering the tape in question, supposedly exclusively for forty-nine ninety-five. Darius grabbed for his credit card.
The video was dark and grainy and hard to make out, but supposedly showed Ashley with Lance Mansfield. Even the thought of her with that snake made Darius’ blood boil. It took all the strength he had to watch the screen. Lance, was fairly easy to make out, but he knew it couldn’t be Ashley. She’d been a virgin, still, in split seconds of the video, there was no denying Ashley’s participation. He saw the birthmark on her hip, and in one shot, a close-up on the upper left side of her face, showed her eyes closed, very obviously in ecstasy as he’d seen that look up close and personal a hundred times or more by now.
When the shot moved to the supposed Ashley giving a blowjob to Lance, Darius had to look away.
He realized by the end of the tape, there hadn’t been any actual intercourse. It had all been oral sex and orgasms.
“And a lot of moaning.”
He growled under his breath and snapped a pen in half.
“She was a virgin.”
He got up and started to pace. Virgin didn’t mean pure. He’d never thought to ask about her sexual experiences that hadn’t been consummated. He’d blindly gone on believing that she’d never been with any man but him, because that’s what he wanted to believe.
His cell rang. Checking the read out, he saw it was Karen again.
“What’s up?”
“I sent out the preliminary statement and contacted Mrs. Williams’ lawyer. He’ll meet with you as soon as you can get there.”
He let out a breath and rolled his shoulders. He needed to keep perspective. He had a client who needed him and despite how this all affected him personally, he needed to keep his head in the game if he were to protect her.
“Thanks, Karen. You guys surviving down there?”
“We’re doing our job as you should be, Darius.”
He took the personal hit hard because he knew he deserved it.
“I realize she’s your girlfriend at this point, but right now she is under attack professionally and personally, and it’s your job to protect her. You need to keep your focus and don’t go wallowing in cuckolded male land. Whatever did or did not happen between Mrs. Williams and Mr. Mansfield was three years ago. Keep your perspective.”
Her words sank in deep. She was exactly right.
“I’m good, Karen. I’ll stop by after the lawyers and we’ll put together a full scale attack.”
“I’ll see you then.”
They disconnected. This was a bigger scandal than anything his office had handled before, but he knew they’d be on top of it.
He went back to the computer and hit the enter button again, pulling up an interview Lance had given late last night after the video broke, all about his long term affair with the very married Mrs. Williams.
He began to skim through it, picking up enough to see Lance had accused Ashley of being an insatiable sex addict. Claiming she needed it all the time and since she wasn’t getting any at home, that’s where Lance came in. The affair had supposedly lasted eight months when Lance broke it off because he fell in love with Ashley and he knew she’d never leave her husband.
He went on to describe some of their more outrageous kinks and one particular night in question in a club downtown where Ashley, Lance, and two other men had a sexual encounter in one of the VIP rooms.
It turned his stomach. He threw a glass globe across the room, the sound of it shattering upon impact only mildly satisfying.
He went back to the article. Though at the moment he’d rather chew off his own foot than see what else this man had said about the woman he loved, but it was his job.
He noticed Lance rarely alluded to anything more than oral sex in public, multiple sex partners, and a few fetishes.
Darius cringed, though, when he got to the part where Lance generously shared several personal correspondences between himself and Ashley.
“Oh, my God, this is bad.”
He scrubbed his hands over his face. His head already throbbed. The upside was Hollywood had a relatively short attention span. In another day or week, someone would be doing something else that will grab all the media attention. They just had to get through this together.
He knew Ashley would hear all the things Lance said, Darius wished more than anything he could somehow protect her from it, but there wasn’t any way.
He sent a few more emails, took three calls and made a half dozen, but he needed to get to the lawyers office, then to his own.
He needed to see Ashley as well, but knew she’d have questions he didn’t have answers to yet. She’d been so pale. He was glad she’d been in too much shock to take it all in and hoped Johnny and Paige would keep her away from the television for the rest of the day.
Grabbing his keys, he headed out for what would probably be the most challenging day of his life.
* * * *
“You did this.”
Ashley didn’t wait to be announced, and despite the orchestrated protests of his receptionist, she knew she’d find Morey alone and waiting for her.
“Did you really think I was just going to let you walk away?”
She controlled the shiver his snake-like smile brought.
“And Lance?”
“He was well paid.”
Morey sank into the chair behind his desk, a grin much like the cat that ate the canary playing on his wretched, lying lips.
“We were right, after all, when we warned you about him.”
She couldn’t entirely argue. Granted, Morey was the catalyst, but she imagined Lance would have played ball with anyone bringing enough to the table.
“What did you offer him?”
“Representation.”
Her mouth silently fell open.
“That was all?”
“Sweetheart, I’m one of the top PR firms in Hollywood. It was more than enough.”
She stiffly walked to one of the visitor seats and sat down. Her head hurt. It still spun, and she was so far out of her depth, she was quite certain no one could save her now.
“And the tape?”
He shrugged, laced his fingers in front of him, and smiled.
“Lance tapes all his women. We did some splicing, but you gave us more than enough of a base to work with. Really, Ashley, you were a very naughty little girl.”
She dug her fingers into the arm of the chair to keep from throwing one of his award statues that so liberally laced his office at his head. She hated she’d been so easily manipulated by Lance, but that was three years ago. She wasn’t the same person anymore.
“I’m not a little girl any longer.”
He stood again, his smile disappearing as he did. Ashley refused to cringe, but it took all her effort not to, especially as he came toward her.
“No. I imagine you’re not after being in Darius Kiersen’s bed.” He placed his hands over hers on the chair arms and leaned his face down near hers.
“Tell me, darling, does he satisfy you?”
She yanked her hands from beneath his and pushed the chair back to escape him.
“My personal life isn’t any of your business.”
She stepped back toward the windows. She was determined to handle this and not cower, but there was a reason people said old habits die hard. Still, she fought with all she had to maintain control of the situation.
“Just tell me what you want, Morey. Why on earth you went to all the trouble of trashing a reputation you spent your life building?”
He came toward her. This time, she stood her ground and even met his lecherous stare. She wasn’t at all prepared however for when he reached out and grazed her left breast.
“They really are non-existent on their own, aren’t they? It’s a shame. You really should have listened to me, Ashley. I’m not sure how the people at Playboy will feel about the new you and I think a new layout needs to be one of our first moves.”
She backed up another step, but that only served the purpose of sandwiching herself between the windows and Morey, a place she wasn’t at all comfortable.
“I’m not doing any more centerfolds. I’m old enough to make my own decisions and quite frankly, I’m tired. I’m tired of the game, the dance. I just want to experience real life for a change. Fall in love…” she drifted off into her dream for a second and whispered, “have babies.”
It was Morey’s harsh laughter that ripped her mind back to the present.
“And you think that faggot Kiersen is going to give you babies?”
He backed off, lost in his own laughter. Ashley took the escape he offered and skittered away back to the desk. She started to wonder why she’d bothered to come here. To save her career? Did she really care?
While she pondered, Morey snuck up on her, wrapping his arms around her, pulling her body close to his own. The contact made her nauseous, but he had her arms pinned to her side and she was trapped.
“You’re a fool, Ashley. This is what we’ve tried to tell you for years. You don’t have the ability to read people. You always trust the wrong ones. Kiersen though, that’s the one that takes the prize.”
He laughed again, but Ashley was getting close to tears, her strength quickly abandoning her. Her body went limp in Morey’s hold.
“He sold you out, sweetheart.”
Her heart stopped.
“No, he didn’t.”
She sounded surer than she felt.
“He did. His job was to keep you distracted until it was too late and he did a brilliant job.”
Her head continued to spin. She wanted to be a self-confident woman in charge of her own life, but she had so much self doubt and so much history to overcome, moments like this pushed her to her limits.
“I can’t believe I ever trusted you. You’re sick.”
She pushed against his hold, hoping he’d be caught off guard and release her, but he only tightened his arms.
“You’re a horrible man, you’re sexist and racist and homophobic and…and, just a horrible, horrible man.”
“Sweetheart,” he brushed the side of her neck with one finger, “I’m all you’ve got.”
That wasn’t true. It couldn’t be true. She wouldn’t let it be true.
“And, Ashley, Lance was a boy. Gabe…well he wouldn’t have been interested even if it was offered up on a daily basis. It’s time you experienced a real man. The way I figure it, after the layout and the new movie you just signed on for, we’ll get married and then you’ll never have to worry
your pretty little head about anything again. I’ll take care of everything from your career…” he moved his hands to cup her cheeks and came so close, she feared he was actually going to kiss her, “to your body. And one of the first things we need to fix are you implants. They’re going back in, Ashley.”
He stepped away, moved back behind his desk, and clicked a few buttons on his computer that caused the printer to hum to life.
Ashley stood frozen and stunned.
Morey moved to the printer and pulled off three sheets before going back to his desk and sitting. He pushed the papers across the desk at her.
“Here. This is your schedule for the rest of the month. I’ll expect you moved back into Gabe’s place tonight and I’ll come by in the morning.”
He put his glasses on and turned all his attention to his computer screen.
Ashley turned to leave like the good little girl she was, confused and slightly dazed.
“And, Ash, you’ve put on weight. Skip dinner tonight. I’ll make an appointment for tomorrow with Jerry. You need to get back to the gym.”
“Right.”
She left the room shaken, miserable, and trapped. The way she’d always been. Her bid for freedom, a complete failure. Her future, not even worth experiencing.
The thought flashed though her mind. What took more strength, surviving in this fish bowl, or ending her life entirely?
She honestly wasn’t sure which would be better.
* * * *
“Am I fired?”
Ashley jumped. It was late and dark in the bedroom, and she hadn’t expected Darius to be up waiting for her. Especially since she hadn’t spent one night in this room since she’d gotten here. In the filtered moonlight however, she cold just make out his shadow as he sat in a chair across the room.
“What? No answer?”
She didn’t like the harsh sound of his voice one bit, but no, she didn’t have an answer for him. Her mind was complete mush at this point. She wasn’t even sure she could get herself into bed for the night.