All is Lost (All Series, Book 2)

by Marie Wathen

  “You are the most beautiful woman, Breesan.”

  Her response is hooded lids, a sweet smile and pink cheeks.

  Yeah, there is no fucking way I am going to be in control around my highly responsive baby tonight.

  Chapter Thirty

  Breesan

  Ohmyfuckinglord! Marcus Walker is shirtless on my bed. Soft light from the bathroom illuminates his thick chest and broad shoulders. I’ve dreamed about this moment with him like this for months and there he is, propping on my pillow with the sexiest smile I have ever seen. His eyes latch onto me and I somehow manage to gracefully cross the room. Instead of getting into the bed on my side, I make my way over to his. Deep green eyes hold my soul captive. I reach down and take his hand into mine, feeling a jolt all the way to my heart. He breaks our gaze to stare down at our hands laced together. Does he feel it too?

  I stand beside him nervous as hell, and with a shaky voice, I say, “Marcus.” I clear my throat to start again and it draws his attention back to my eyes. “Marcus, I missed you so much.” His smile brightens with my confession, but he remains silent allowing me to continue. Admitting that was easier than I thought, but I need another moment to catch my breath before adding, “You are important to me and I think you feel the same for me. I want you to make everyone, and everything outside of this room, disappear.”

  His pleased smile and sparkling emerald eyes shift to a ravenous expression, alerting me that tonight he will do anything I ask. Pulling me with one hand onto the bed, his free hand guides my leg over his waist so that I straddle him, allowing me to feel how hard he is already. He releases my hand, moving both of his to my hips and draws me down onto his chest. My eyes instantly draw toward his tattoos. Mouthwatering thoughts inundate my mind as I imagine tracing every line with my tongue. I skim my hands over his smooth, hard muscles and up his neck while biting back a groan that desperately threatens to embarrass me. Feeling his scorching heat with our bodies pressed solidly together, my breasts strain against the tee-shirt, causing my nipples to pebble hard, and all that my mind can process is that I need the thin barrier between us gone.

  “Breesan,” Marcus says in a raspy, passionate voice. My ultimate test at the moment is keeping my focus off of his lips. I ignore the pleas of my body and I devote every ounce of my attention on his eyes. “The first time I saw you I dreamed of making love to you. The night you slept in my bed and every night since it has taken everything in me to keep my hands off so that I could be the gentleman that you deserve.” Marcus releases a ragged breath while running his hand up my ribcage slowly, “But Baby, if you’re asking me to dissolve the world around us, leaving only you and me, I won’t be able to stop myself.”

  I heed his warning, swirl it around my mind until I fully understand his meaning. His words reflect more than just a night of passionate love making. This is a commitment vowing that I will only be for him, and he will only be for me. His words mean everything to me, but it is what I sense in his eyes that solidifies my resolve. They beg me not to hurt him.

  Relaxing into his embrace, I delicately rub my hand over his heart signifying the value of his offer, “Marcus, I want you to start loving me tonight and please don’t stop.”

  “I have loved you for far longer than tonight, and I can’t ever stop.” Marcus’ truth illuminates so brightly through these healing words, and from his unfaltering expression, which is breathtakingly blinding.

  “I know,” I whisper, confirming the truth I see in his eyes. With a stronger voice, I say, “I love you so much.” Marcus’ breath hitches, revealing that he didn’t expect for me to say these words to him or that he didn’t know that I in fact feel this way about him.

  Our love is exposed. We understand that from this moment forward we aren’t only devoting our bodies, we are entrusting our souls to each other, and no more words are necessary. With our gazes locked on each other, our focus turns toward the desires revealed in our eyes.

  Marcus’ right hand slips under the hem of my shirt, igniting goose bumps that rush to follow his path up to my breast. His fingers skim along the edge as his thumb seeks out and finds my nipple. He hisses at the contact and a surge of power rips through my entire body. The tender caress is mind blowing, but then he changes the pressure to a desperate squeeze, causing my hips to buck with the carnal sensation. He possessed my heart so long ago and tonight Marcus will own my body. A soft moan rolls off my lips and I drop my head back, my long hair draping over his thighs.

  His hips lift off the bed eagerly, searching with his cock for the effects that his touch does to my body. I bite down hard on my bottom lip and my eyes slide closed, feeling the thickness of him sliding between my thighs. I lean back, placing my hands on his knees and swirl over him lightly. He moans and rolls his hips slowly, pushing me up and then encouraging me to sink back down on him over and over again. Like a hunger, I feel awareness in my body that I never knew was possible, and I want more. I lift my head, looking down at Marcus’ face. His eyes are pinched closed and his mouth is slightly parted, allowing heavy breaths and a low moan to escape. I press down hard on him with my center and he murmurs, “You feel so damn good on me.”

  His words and body responding so needy to me, drives my ache to a vast intensity, rejecting every cognitive thought, and all I can do now is feel. In this place, it is just Marcus, consuming and mending me. His left hand snakes along my thigh and up my stomach, exploring the underside of my right breast. He pushes his hand up and cups me with both hands, taunting both nipples with his thumbs delicately scraping over the tips. I gasp at the extreme care he uses on my now burning flesh.

  “Ohgod, yes Marcus. Touch me,” I pant heavily and feel a pulse throbbing in his cock.

  His heavy lids lift, exposing long hidden secrets of hope and love, and I am momentarily locked in a gaze so intense that I feel my heart liquefying. The love Marcus has for me has been there all along, but I refused it, not wanting to see that he needed me as much as I needed him. How did I ever resist him?

  Suddenly I need to drown myself in him. I move my hands from his legs, placing them on his stomach, savoring the feel of his hot skin under my fingertips. Every ridge of his muscles contracts against my touch. A savage growl vibrates in my chest as he removes his hands from my puckered nipples, skimming down my stomach and slipping under the edge of my panties. Heat fills my belly and rushes lower, ending at the center of my sex. I lean forward pressing my chest against his, slowly guiding my hands up and over his thick shoulders. With my hands digging into his neck, I crush my lips to his before pushing my center down on him, hard. His mouth tastes like hot cinnamon and I savor it with greediness.

  This first kiss after admitting our love for each other is perfection. The warmth of it entices me to bravely slide my tongue over his lips and into his mouth. Frantically, I search out and find my reward when he begins dancing his tongue around mine. A carnal sound rumbles deep in his chest urging me to grind on him more. Rising off the pillows, he lifts my body so that I am sitting on his lap and he greedily forces his tongue into my mouth, launching our mating process.

  Breaking our kiss, his lips begin a torturous path teasing my chin and moving down my neck. Marcus nibbles and licks, then kisses each spot with his scorching hot mouth. With my arms draping loosely over his shoulders, my head drops back, allowing him full access to all that belongs to him. Underneath me, he feels hot and hard, all man and I can’t resist writhing against him. The severely inflicting ache our friction creates drives my breasts to thrust forward. In one quick movement, Marcus lifts my shirt up and over my head. Lowering his eyes to my chest, he briefly halts his movements, while he stares with lustful appreciation.

  “You are amazing,” He whispers roughly before taking one hard nipple in his mouth while rolling and pinching the other sensitive bud between his fingers.

  I have never endured anything more agonizing or incredible than the way Marcus makes my body feel. Like a sedative to my fractured soul, his mouth sends my
mind into oblivion and I relinquish full control of my body to the only man it has ever belonged to completely. His mouth moves to the other nipple and I moan a throaty approval. Every cell in my body awakes when his tongue slides between my breasts and he licks his way back up to my lips.

  His gaze rises up and those beautiful green eyes lock onto mine, staring at me like I am the most fascinating thing he has ever seen. “I need you so much, Baby.”

  Slowly lifting my hands, I rake my fingers through his soft hair, lean forward and kiss him gently. I whisper against his swollen lips, “I am forever all yours.”

  Gracefully twisting our bodies, Marcus gently lays me down in the center of the bed, positioning his legs between mine. He stares deeply into my eyes before allowing his gaze to roam down my neck, over my breast and stopping at top of the white lace covering the area that speaks for itself. At least that’s what I call it. He places his right hand on my right hip, digging his fingers into my flesh slightly before gliding it slowly across my lower abdomen. His thumb traces under the edge of my undies, teasing the top of my needy slit.

  He sucks in a deep breath and moans, “Is this mine?”

  “Yes…” I whisper, begging for more.

  My nerves come alive realizing how close we are to finally having sex. The already erratic blood pounding through my veins blurs out all sound as it reaches my ears. Enjoying a multitude of sensations, I loosely close my eyes and tip my head back. Both of his hands caress over my sizzling flesh up to my chest. Seductively with deliberate manipulation, his hands flex over my breasts, kneading with a tenderness saved for a delicate piece of artwork. I open my eyes and look at the movements, feeling tingles rush along my hot skin.

  “Are these mine?” He stares into my eyes deeply, lust and love battling for dominance in his smoldering emerald irises.

  I gasp twice at the sensation and from his gaze and growl, “Ohgod yes, Marcus.”

  Biting down hard on his lip, he controls his movements, but I can see that he’s barely hanging on. Our breathing is heavy panting that borders painful. Roughly, he pushes against my wet center and I spiral out of control.

  “Marcus,” I beg breathlessly, wanting him to take me now.

  “Yes Baby,” he growls, knowing exactly what I’m asking. “I will give you everything you want.”

  Still torturing me mercilessly, he removes his hands from my swollen breast and I whimper pitifully. A sexy as fuck smiles breaks across his face as he pushes the tips of his fingers into the burning flesh along my ribs, dragging them slowly down to my hips.

  Pausing momentarily to gauge my reaction, he says, “I want to see you.”

  I nod slowly, licking my lips in intense anticipation. “Yes.”

  He digs his fingers under the edges of the lacy garments, pulls them down my legs and then takes his position between them again. He lowers his massive body, resting on his arms and pressing his hardness into me. His eyes drift down to our connection and I lift my head off the pillow, seeing what draws out his next groan.

  “Oh fuck, baby. That’s so damn hot.”

  Rocking his hips vigorously against me, his thickness wedges between my lips and I begin to feel a tightening in my belly. My nervousness flourishes with this unfamiliar experience and he notices it in my blush. He stills his body and lifts a hand to my forehead, tenderly pushing away a strand of hair.

  “Am I going too fast?” Marcus asks, scanning my face for signs of uncertainty.

  My heart flips with his loving tenderness. Marcus’ need to go slow with me reminds me of our first encounter. Although it was completely erotic because we were entrapped by seductive groping in a public setting, it was the slow burning awakening of my soul called out by his that branded my heart with Marcus Walker’s name. Seeing his eyes begging for my answer, I somehow manage to find my voice.

  “No. Don’t stop, please. I want you. I’m just nervous.”

  He smiles and presses a kiss to my lips, “I will never do anything to hurt you. All you need to do is feel, lose yourself and enjoy it. Just relax and trust me, I want to worship your body. Our first time making love will be special because it’s you and me Breesan.” I nod my head believing every word he says. He kisses me again and adds, “I love you.”

  His large hand glides from my face to the hollow of my neck where he dips down, placing a kiss there before continuing his descent down my body. I encourage him with a breathy moan while running my fingers through his hair. His lips blaze a trail from one heavy breast to the other and further down, along my stomach. He rises up on his knees, sitting back on his calves. Towering over me, his body glistens with a light sheen as he stares down at my fully exposed body. Without looking me in the eyes, his blazing, and lusty eyes reveal just how difficult it has been for him to sleep with me all of these weeks and not having this access before.

  Hooking his hand behind my left knee, he bends it and lowers his mouth to my knee, eliciting gooseflesh along my skin. Slowly he begins kissing down my inner thigh. I freeze, scare to death of what he is about to do to me. Nibbling, sucking and kissing, his mouth descends gradually, but this time he doesn’t stop because of my reaction. His searing breath and warm tongue heats a part of my body that no other person has ever touched before. His tongue licks across my center at a slow, worshipping pace repeatedly.

  Slapping my hand over my mouth, muffling the strung together words, I groan, “Ohmygod.”

  He nudges my legs further apart with his left arm before sliding it under my thigh. Teasingly he strokes one finger over my entrance and my whole body bucks up wildly with excitement and need. No longer caring about being embarrassed, I stop fighting it and feel him. He guides his finger inside me, drawing out the deepest moan I have ever made.

  “Damn baby, you are so wet and responsive.”

  Panting vigorously, I beg, “Marcus, please make love to me.”

  He strokes his finger, in and out repeatedly, revving up my desire for him to be inside me. His thumb slips over my clit and he presses down, rubbing it torturously with slow circles. My hips grind with his rhythm, like a damn tornado swirling out of control and I whimper wantonly.

  “More...” The word is barely more than a moan over my trembling lips.

  He lowers his mouth over me again, tasting me before slipping his warm lips over my swollen mound. I reach down and grip his head, his damp hair sliding between my fingers and I push him down harder into me. My heavy eyelids lower as a building sensation of epic proportions slams into my belly and between my legs, causing me to clench my thighs together tightly around him.

  “Fuck,” Marcus growls deep within my center.

  A spark, a blast and an inferno seizes my body as I feel a wave of pleasure possessing me so intensely I know that any second I will explode.

  And then he growls again, “Come for me, baby.”

  A kaleidoscope of colors detonates behind my eyelids as I enter into another dimension of consciousness. There are no thoughts here, only sensitivity and perpetual soaring. My body floats on a passionate high completely unequivocal to anything that gravity has to offer, and I know that this can only be a dream. The best fucking dream of my life. My center continues clenching around Marcus’ finger as the tide ebbs, slowly bringing me back to awareness. Edging up my body, Marcus kisses over my prickly skin all the way up to my mouth.

  He kisses me sweetly before whispering, “I need to be inside you, my love.”

  Oh thank god. I cheer silently, praying at the same time that I can please him.

  Slipping off the bed, Marcus undresses and stands before me, allowing me to see all of him. He is so breathtaking. His eyes grab hold of me first and I see his desire, completely volcanic and hypnotic. Within those beautiful glossy, jade colored eyes he reveals his soul, conveying all that he feels for me. It is nothing short of purely unique and surpasses the embodiment of epic love. My heart slams against my chest. The overwhelming feeling is like an atomic bomb detonating and destroying all ability for it to beat
again. My gaze drifts languidly to his mouth.

  With a sexy smirk, he stands still for several moments allowing me to appreciate his assets and giving me the opportunity to calm down. Lowering my eyes more, I scan over his smooth muscles, stretched over his chest, and then lower, down his abdomen.

  “Come here, Baby,” Marcus says. His voice is thick and words are compelling. I edge over to the side of the bed, coming face to face with the man I can’t get enough of.

  Marcus takes my left hand in his and guides it to his chest. My cool fingertips stroke over the dark lines of his artwork, but I want more. Leaning in, I press my lips against the mutilated looking tattoo drawn over his heart. Whatever void that this darkness depicts, it deserves soothing, so I kiss it delicately. He moves his hand up my arm, gliding it over my shoulder and running his fingers through my hair. I scatter soft kisses across his chest moving my mouth up his neck slowly. Rising up further on my knees, I slide both hands up his arms stopping at the tops of his shoulders. He grasps my hair tightly, tilting my head back and guiding me toward his mouth.

  He smashes his lips on mine, kissing me hard and coaxing me to open for his tongue. I open willingly, ready for his harsh assault to continue, but he changes his pace and it becomes a sweet and loving joining. Solace is pledged in Marcus’ enclosed arms draping around my body. He loves me and desires above all else to protect me. Giving into him and being his in all ways is everything I need.

  Breaking away from our kiss, Marcus gently pushes me down on the bed again. He reaches into his bag and pulls out a condom. I place my hand on top of his, stopping him before he rips it open.

  I shake my head and say, “You don’t have to…”

  “Baby, are you sure?”

  “Yes, I’m safe and I get a birth control shot every three months.”

  Hesitantly he drops the packet on the nightstand before saying, “I’ve never had sex without one before and I’m safe too. I just want you to be certain.”