The Military Wife

by Laura Trentham

  “Fine. I’ll use your money and start up the best new business Fort Bragg has ever seen.”

  “Yeah, you will.”

  Her frustration and nerves eased. The amorphous vision of what she and the other women could accomplish was becoming solid. Could they pull it off?

  He stamped his feet. “Only a few miles until Seth’s cabin. Let’s go.”

  They walked and shared favorite movies and books. The small talk seemed inconsequential, but taken as a totality, it deepened her understanding of him. Jack bounded through the woods and a few minutes later the park ranger’s station came into view through the trees. Disappointment zinged through her. Not how she expected to feel at the end of their time together.

  She only had moments of solitude left with him.

  “Bennett?” She laid a hand on his arm, and he glanced over, his steps slowing but not stopping. “I want to know…” The cold and her nerves stalled the question. She’d lied and manipulated and engineered the weekend to ask about Noah.

  Yet she couldn’t force the words out. Not right now at any rate. She hadn’t considered the emotional toil the retelling would take on him; she’d thought only of herself. But the guilt and regrets he bore from that time were obvious.

  “You want to know what?” As if he suspected the bend of her thoughts to the past, his brows drew in and his mouth tightened, emphasizing his intimidating good looks.

  “I want to know what you find out about Darren.”

  “Yeah, okay, sure.” He looked as if he wanted to say more, but she picked up the pace and led them to relative civilization.

  The warmth of the ranger station made her want to dance, and the sight of the toilet made her want to cry.

  Seth offered them coffee, and she gratefully accepted. Wrapping both hands around the mug, she closed her eyes and inhaled the distinct aroma. The smell reminded her of her mother and her childhood and comfort. It reminded her of home.

  Home Front. “Home Front Coffee.”

  Bennett stopped whatever he was saying to Seth. “What’s that?”

  “Sorry. Didn’t mean to interrupt, but what about Home Front Coffee? People would know based on the name it’s related to the military. What do the men and women deployed long for more than anything? Everyone longs for home in a way, don’t they? It’s why The Wizard of Oz still resonates.”

  Bennett tilted his head. She tensed. His judgment shouldn’t matter, but it did. A smile slashed through his beard. “That’s damn good.”

  She relaxed back against the counter and took a sip of coffee. Without taking his eyes off her, he said, “We’ll get out of your hair, Seth. Thanks again for letting me use your place as a jumping-off point.”

  “Anytime, man.” Seth’s gaze ping-ponged between her and Bennett, a question in his smile.

  She grabbed her stuff, located her car keys, and followed Bennett outside. How could it have only been yesterday when she’d arrived? It felt like weeks had passed.

  She threw her backpack in the trunk of her car and lingered. He came around the side of his truck and held out a business card with a number handwritten across the top.

  “That’s my cell. Shoot me a text so I’ll have your number. Soon as I talk to Darren, I’ll let you know,” he said.

  She slipped the card into her back pocket. Jack snuffled into her hand, and she squatted down to give him a hug and nuzzle the top of his head. “Ugh. Someone needs a bath. I hope I’m not smelling myself.” She laughed up at Bennett. He didn’t return her smile. In fact, his expression was more solemn than usual.

  She stood and ran her hands down the legs of her jeans. “This was … interesting.”

  “That’s one way to put it.” His dry sarcasm took any sting out of the comment.

  “Thanks for not letting me freeze to death.”

  “It would have been bad for business.”

  The moment veered toward awkward. She was ready to see Ben, take a hot shower, and eat a home-cooked meal, yet getting her feet to move to her driver’s seat was like dragging anchors. Should she offer a hand for a shake or lean in for a hug? In the end, she did neither, taking a step backward. “Okay, well. Bye.”

  He didn’t stop her. She pulled out of the drive and onto the park road, her attention on her rearview mirror. He stood at the tailgate of his truck, watching her drive away. She stared until he disappeared behind the trees, a sense of melancholy blanketing her. Why?

  Yes, he was connected to an important part of her past. But there was more. He was interesting and complicated and … attractive. Flames of embarrassment and guilt prickled her chest and neck.

  All her mother’s talk about flings and things hanging down to knees must have cracked open a door in her subconscious. That’s all this was. A Freudian complex.

  Driving the familiar roads back to Nags Head, she wondered what Bennett was doing. Was Jack his only company? Did he sit in silence or did he need music or the TV on to drown out the thoughts that plagued him?

  She pulled in to the driveway, but before she went inside to the chaos of Ben and her mom, she pulled out her phone and his card.

  Made it home. Hope I wasn’t too much a bother. Thanks again.

  She tapped her fingers against the steering wheel and waited.

  JL and I are home, too. Not a bother. At all. Talk soon.

  She clutched the phone to her chest, the nerves and excitement not brand new, but like a bear coming out of torpor, she felt clumsy and out of practice.

  Chapter 12

  Past

  Harper smoothed her hair and tugged at her sweater. The bustle of travelers coming off the escalator in the airport broke around her like she was the rock in their stream. It had been six months since she’d seen Noah. He was a phase away from completing SEAL training in California, and she was on winter break, her first semester at UNC in the books.

  The last time she’d seen Noah had been at the end of five magical days and nights before he’d left for BUD/S. They’d said their good-byes standing on the end of the pier, the summer air superheating her out-of-control emotions. That’s how he’d wanted it even though she’d offered to see him off at the airport.

  She’d girded herself to never hear from him again and brushed away tears on her walk back home, but only an hour of moping had passed before an email from him popped into her in-box. The thrill was like nothing she’d ever experienced. Not love, but something beyond infatuation.

  Now six months later, her hair was longer and she no longer sported her summer tan. She was in jeans and a sweater instead of shorts and tank tops. Between her part-time job in the campus library and studying, she basically lived in the reference section. It had paid off. She’d made the dean’s list with all As and had saved enough to put off needing a loan.

  Basically, she worried she wasn’t the same girl Noah remembered from the summer. But that’s not all. What if she had idealized Noah? What if he wasn’t as cute and funny and nice as she remembered? Because of their insane schedules, they’d only communicated through emails and letters since the summer.

  The flow of people trickled to a handful. Had he seen her and hidden? Was he waiting for her to give up and leave so he wouldn’t have to face her? Her stomach felt worse than it had before her statistics final.

  She checked the clock and stared at the top of the escalator. If he didn’t show up in five more minutes, she would leave. A man appeared. Broad shouldered and blond headed and even more handsome than she remembered.

  Her breath hitched and her knees wobbled her a step closer. He didn’t wait for the escalator to carry him down but took the steps two at a time. A military-issue rucksack hung over one shoulder, but he was in civilian clothes—jeans and a long-sleeve T-shirt in dark blue.

  She didn’t move to meet him. More accurately, she couldn’t move, because he had changed too. Although his hair was the same blond and his eyes blue, he’d turned from a lanky Georgia farm boy into a man. His face was leaner, but his body had filled in with what
appeared to be all muscle.

  Now not only was she fighting nerves but shyness too. Not something that had affected her while she’d been writing him endless emails and letters over the fall.

  He stopped in front of her and dropped his bag but didn’t touch her. “I’ve missed you, Harper Lee.” His voice, too, had matured, reflecting a vastness of experiences.

  He’d sketched out hardship and challenges to her through his words in the vaguest terms. Faced with him, she understood he had come through a crucible and emerged forever changed.

  “You’re different.” She wanted to stuff the words back in her mouth.

  “Yeah.” He fingered the ends of her hair and a shock buzzed through her as if her hair contained millions of nerve endings. “Your hair is longer.”

  “Didn’t have time to get it cut.”

  “I like it. Did they post your grades?”

  “All As.”

  “Babe. That’s amazing. Not that I had any doubt you’d kill it.” It was his smile that burned away all her nerves and shyness. One corner of his mouth hitched a little higher than the other and his blue eyes crinkled with the force of his happiness. This was the Noah who’d populated her dreams and fantasies.

  She took a step into his chest, wrapped her arms around him, and laid her cheek against his neck. A deep breath reassured her further. His scent fired memories of lying on the beach in his arms and making out until the sun edged over the horizon signaling the dawn.

  His arms came around her as he nosed the hair at her temple, kissing her where her heartbeat pulsed.

  “I missed you, too, Noah.”

  “For a second there coming down the escalator, I thought you were going to bolt like a wild turkey at Thanksgiving.”

  “For a second, I thought I was, too.”

  He pulled back and met her eyes, his smile diminished by worry. “Why?”

  “Because you’re not the same Noah who left this summer.”

  He flexed his arm. The fabric stretched and outlined his impressive biceps. “BUD/S has whipped my sorry butt in shape.”

  “I mean, yes. You look … God, you look amazing.” Verbalizing her thoughts was difficult when her hormones were making a case for dragging him somewhere private to let her hands do the talking. “But it goes beyond your abs. You seem older.”

  Thankfully, he didn’t make a joke. “I feel older. Or more mature, I guess. The training is more than physical. It’s testing and building our mental strength, if that makes sense.”

  “Will you tell me about it?”

  “Later, I will.” He reached for her hand and linked their fingers. “Right now, though, I’m dying for some sweet tea and fried chicken.”

  “Mom is making all that and more.”

  “Your mom is a saint.”

  “She’s shooting more for sinner than saint now that her retirement is in sight. I caught her setting up an online dating profile last week.”

  His laugh was cut short when they stepped outside. While an endless blue sky stretched itself around the bright sun, the breeze held a bite of winter. “Damn, it’s cold.”

  Harper poked him playfully in his solid stomach. “One part of you has gone soft. Has your blood gotten thin from living out there in California?”

  “When the instructors aren’t torturing us, it’s as close to paradise as I’ve ever seen.”

  She led him to her used Honda. It had been a present from her mom. The only caveat of accepting it had been a promise to make the drive back to Nags Head when she could. While she had grudgingly agreed, once at college Harper hadn’t found coming home a hardship. Homesickness had hit her hard once the realities of college had set in.

  She popped the trunk for Noah to store his rucksack and then they were off for the drive from Norfolk to Nags Head. The conversation ebbed and flowed with the comforting rhythm of the ocean.

  Harper stole glances at him throughout the drive, not quite believing he was there in the flesh and blood. Her stream-of-consciousness emails had sometimes seemed like diary entries. His replies were never as detailed or revealing.

  God, she’d told him about walking into the bathroom and interrupting her roommate and her boyfriend mid-coitus. And the time she’d woken up late for class and run across campus still in her penguin pajama pants. A sudden burst of embarrassment had her patting her forehead and turning the air down in the car.

  She cleared her throat and clutched the steering wheel so tight her palms squeaked against the plastic. “By the way, I’m not as crazy as my emails might have implied.”

  “Crazy? You kept me sane.”

  “I did?”

  “Knowing I might have one of your stories waiting on me kept me from giving up more than once.”

  “They weren’t actually made up. All that stuff happened.”

  He slipped his hand onto her leg, and her foot jerked, sending the Honda ten miles over the speed limit to match her heart rate. “I know, but it was the way you told it that was so entertaining. Everyone thought so.”

  Her foot eased off the accelerator. She wasn’t thrilled at the prospect of other men reading what she’d thought was for Noah’s eyes only. “What do you mean ‘everyone’?”

  “Just the guys in my room. One in particular doesn’t have anyone.”

  “No girlfriend, you mean?”

  “No girlfriend, no family. No one.” Uncertainty replaced his newfound confidence. “You’re not mad, are you?”

  “I don’t appreciate being made fun of. Did you read them everything?” While she wasn’t explicit in her emails, she had expressed her feelings in a way she didn’t feel comfortable doing face-to-face yet.

  “Of course not. Just the funny stuff. And no one was making fun. In fact, one of the guys, Hollis, wanted me to give you his number in case you got tired of me.” His laugh contained an apologetic twist. “I’ll stop. I’m sorry. I just wanted them to know how awesome you are.”

  How could she stay upset when he said stuff like that? “That’s okay. I didn’t realize how hard up you guys were out there.”

  “Hard up? Women crawl all over us as soon as we step off base. It’s the uniform.”

  Harper pumped the brakes hard enough to lock their seat belts. “Are they all over you?”

  Noah seemed to recognize his major misstep. Red burnished his face as if the cold wind had come inside. “I don’t want any of those women. Why would I when I have someone like you? More than anything, I want to make you proud, Harper. Do you believe me?”

  Her head talked her heart from off the ledge. He wouldn’t have brought it up if he’d been messing around with base bunnies. Trust was easy to come by with him next to her, his hand still on her leg, his blue eyes aimed in her direction, and his smile veering toward adorable. “Of course I do. Now, what do you want to do while you’re home besides eat fried chicken?”

  They made general plans, but it didn’t really matter what they did as long as they were together. They only had four days. Noah had to be back for his final phase of BUD/S right after New Year’s.

  She parked along the street in front of her house. Her mom had been accommodating but hardly enthusiastic to find out Noah would be staying with them for a few days over break. A warm reception was not guaranteed. All Harper could do was cross her fingers and hope how important Noah was to her had sunk in.

  Noah had met her mom over the summer, but Harper and Noah had only wanted to be around each other. Her mom’s protective lectures and opinions had been ignored.

  “I’m nervous.” Noah ran his hands down the front of his jeans.

  “She doesn’t bite. Usually.” Harper tossed a grin over her shoulder as she jogged up the steps. The front door swung open before she even made it to the top.

  “Hello, darling. Noah. It’s wonderful to see you again.” While her mom’s voice wouldn’t classify as excited, it was welcoming.

  Harper breathed a sigh of relief. Her mom held out her hand for Noah to shake.

  “Nice to se
e you again, Ms. Frazier. I really appreciate you putting me up. In fact, before I forget…” He swung his rucksack off his shoulder and dug his hand inside, pulling out a rectangular object in a brown bag. “This is for you.”

  “You shouldn’t have.” Her mom took the present and pulled out a book with a gasp. She opened the cover of a hardback version of To Kill a Mockingbird. “It’s a first edition. And in excellent condition. I love it. Thank you. And call me Gail.”

  Her mom shepherded him into the house and sent Harper a virtual fist bump with a look over her shoulder. Harper couldn’t stem her grin, not shocked Noah had won her mom over, but surprised at how quickly it had happened. Although Noah had won her over in a single afternoon.

  The smells of fried chicken drew them into the kitchen. The table was set and the food was ready for an early dinner. After Noah’s fourth piece of chicken, Harper laughed and her mom joked about making another run to the grocery store.

  Noah wiped his sheepish grin with his napkin. “I relish good food whenever I can get it.”

  “They’re obviously not starving you,” Harper said.

  “No, but it’s like being back in school. Cafeteria-style. Quantity over quality.”

  The longer they lingered over the meal, the more impatient Harper grew to get Noah alone. As soon as the dishes were cleared, Harper backed out of the kitchen and grabbed Noah’s hand on the way.

  “I’ll help you clean up in a bit, Mom. I want to take Noah down to the dock to watch the sunset.”

  “I’ll take care of it. You two run along.”

  Harper hoped Noah had missed her mom’s not-so-subtle wink.

  Once she and Noah were out of sight of the house, she notched herself into his side. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and matched her pace. They headed not to the beach but to the waterway to the west. The quiet serenity appealed to her more than the touristy beach side.

  “Where did you find the book?” she asked.

  “A used bookshop in San Diego. I always look for To Kill a Mockingbird because I like to see your name.”