Torn Souls

by Cattabriga, crystal

  “Okay then, but Julia I have to ask you...did you start it or did she? Please don’t get upset with me. I’m just trying to figure out why she’d go after you. Do you have any ideas?” Mr. Joseph asked.

  I froze. What was I supposed to say? I really wasn’t sure why she never liked me, never mind why she’d beat me up in the hall at school. I thought for a minute or so before answering with the only explanation I had. She didn’t like me hanging around Alex. I really didn’t want to bring Alex up to the principal, but I had no other choice.

  “The only thing I can come up with, Mr. Joseph, is that on my first day here, she confronted me about hanging around Alex.”

  “Really? So what you’re telling me, Julia, is that this might all be because of Alex?” Mr. Joseph said with a puzzled look on his face.

  Before I could say anything back, Alex turned his head toward me and said, “What are you talking about, Julia?”

  I could see he was upset and he had every right to be. I never told him about Bridget when I should have, but I didn’t want to discuss this in front of the principal either. Luckily, I didn’t have to. The paramedic’s came the same time my parents arrived. Of course, my mom was freaked out and said she was going to ride with me to the hospital. Dad pulled the principal aside, but I had no idea what he was saying and poor Alex was just standing there. Dad had told Mom he would meet up with us when he was done talking with Mr. Joseph.

  Because Alex was supposed to come over to my house after school he rode with Mom and me in the ambulance to the hospital. Mom was asking me a million questions while Alex sat quietly, unless Mom directed a question toward him. It didn’t take very long for us to get there, and I actually saw a doctor much faster than I was expecting, which may have been the one perk of being taken to the hospital by ambulance.

  Dad showed up when I was heading to get an x-ray done on the left side of my rib cage. The doctor said it probably wasn’t broken, but to be on the safe side he wanted to check everything thoroughly. Once I was back in the room, it was twenty questions all over again. I just wanted to go home and forget the whole day, but with my parents, that wasn’t going to happen. I also wanted to try and fix things with Alex. I knew he was mad at me.

  The doctor came back in no time and informed all of us that my ribs weren’t cracked just a lot of bruising from being kicked repeatedly. I didn’t even realize I had been kicked more than once, but then again I didn’t remember much.

  “Take some Ibuprofen and try to avoid lying on that side, Julia. You’ll be sore for a couple of weeks, but you’ll heal. You’re young and healthy,” the doctor said with a smile.

  When we got home Mom wouldn’t stop babying me. I wanted to go in my room, but she insisted that I stay out in the living room so she could get me what I needed. I didn’t need anything except to be alone with Alex. I needed to apologize to him and make things right. I wasn’t sure what to say to Alex except to tell him that I was sorry, but I wasn’t sure that was going to be enough.

  “Hey, Julia, are you alright?” Dad asked.

  “Yes, I’m okay. Remember what the doctor said? I’ll heal in a couple of weeks,” I reminded him.

  “Sorry, I know your mom and I can be a little overbearing sometimes. Anyway, I’m heading out. Do you and Alex want me to bring back some pizzas? I think your mom will be fine with not cooking tonight. Her nerves are shot.”

  I turned to look at Alex and said, “Cheese or pepperoni?”

  “Whatever, I don’t care really.”

  I could hear the anger and disappointment in his voice. I couldn’t take it anymore, so as soon as Dad left, and Mom was busy doing whatever she was doing, I took Alex’s hand and said, “Come on.” Slowly getting off the couch we headed into my room. I closed the door and sat just a few inches away, directly facing him so he could see how sorry I really was when I spoke.

  “Alex, look at me, please.”

  As he picked up his head to look at me I didn’t see anger in his eyes anymore. What I saw was sadness. His eyes looked glazed as if he was going to cry and I wasn’t sure why. My hands started to sweat a little. My side was hurting so bad yet I needed to push through the pain and tell him why I did what I did.

  “I know you’re upset with me Alex and you have every right to be, but please let me explain myself.” He didn’t say anything. He just sat there waiting for me to continue, so I did. “I didn’t say anything to you because I was hoping Bridget would just get tired of harassing me. Don’t get me wrong, I was bothered by her name calling, but that’s all it was, at first. Then one day she happened to see you and me hanging around and for some reason she didn’t like it. That’s when she first started threatening me, trying to force me to stop hanging around with you.”

  Before I could continue Alex stopped me and asked, “So if she told you to stop hanging around with me, then why wouldn’t you come to me for some answer?”

  “I’m not sure, to tell you the truth. There were a couple of times where I wanted to ask you as much as I wanted to tell you what was going on, but I didn’t. I think I was just embarrassed, and hoped the problem would resolve itself.”

  “Julia, the only reason why I’m upset is because you didn’t trust me enough to share what was going on. I would’ve protected you.” His sincerity made me tear up just a little. He was right, I should’ve trusted him.

  “Alex, I have a question,” I said, wondering if I’d get an answer.

  “What question is that, Julia?”

  “Why would Bridget tell me to stay away from you?”

  “Bridget and her family moved here a couple of years ago from Washington. I met her when she transferred into middle school in seventh grade. She was different back then. We became friends like you and I are, but over time she didn’t want to be just friends, she wanted us to be more. I tried to explain to her that I didn’t feel the same way which didn’t go over so well with her. Bridget became possessive of me. Every girl I talked to she’d have a problem with.”

  “At one point she started telling people we were in a relationship which made me upset. At the end of eighth grade we had a falling out and she said she no longer wanted me around. It was never my intention to hurt her. I tried my best to make her understand and told her that I still wanted to be her friend, but she insisted that our friendship was over. “

  “Julia, you have to believe me when I say I didn’t know that she still wasn’t over this obsession. I would’ve protected you. I would’ve made sure she stayed away from you. I never wanted any of this to happen.”

  “It’ okay, Alex, I don’t blame you. Part of me feels bad for her because she’s very angry. Maybe there’s more going on in her life for her to bully me, or for anyone to be bullied. I’m not sure if I can even go back to school. I’m not going to lie or pretend that I'm not scared, because I am. This girl attacked me right in the middle of school with people all around me. What will stop her from doing it over and over again?”

  “I think you’re safe. I’m pretty sure Principal Joseph has contacted her mother,” Alex said, trying to reassure me.

  Maybe he was right. Surely they’d have to reprimand her for what she’s done, but what if she does it again? What if she continues to do it? Maybe she won’t bother me anymore from fear of caught, but what if she decides to do it to someone else? I remembered the fear on other students faces as they passed Bridget in the hall. The memory bothered me enough to wonder if I wasn’t the only one being bullied by this girl.

  Soon after Alex and I talked things out and repaired our friendship, Mom came in the room to ask if everything was alright. I had a feeling she was in the hallway listening, but I didn’t want to say anything. I knew she was just worried with everything that had just happened.

  “Yes, things are good,” I said to her and then looked at Alex, just to be sure.

  “Things are going to get better, Mrs. Stone, I promise. I’ll never let anything happen to Julia again, cross my heart,” Alex said.

  “Sc
oot over,” Mom said to Alex as she sat down beside him. “Listen, none of this is your fault, Alex. I don’t blame you. I blame the girl who couldn’t keep her hands to herself. Julia’s right, maybe this girl is going through more things in her life than we know or maybe she just enjoys beating up kids, but no one should have to go to school in fear. Not my Julia or any other child. Well, now with that being said, your dad is in the living room. He’d like to talk to you both.”

  “Okay. Tell Dad we’ll be there in a second, okay?”

  “Sure thing, honey, I’ll let him know. Don’t be too long,” Mom said as she walked out of my room.

  Even though I was still hurting physically, I was feeling much better emotionally. I knew as long as Alex and I were still friends, I’d be okay. I was also a little relieved that everything was out in the open and that I didn’t have to lie to Alex or my parents anymore. I didn’t want to focus on what happened anymore for today. I wanted to enjoy what time I had left before Alex’s mom came and picked him up. We we’re now on Christmas vacation and I couldn’t wait to spend it with Alex.

  “So, now that we’ve made up, I wanted to clear the air about what really happened when we were at Central park…”

  “Oh, the kiss,” Alex said as he laughed. I know it was just because you were excited. I had forgotten all about it.”

  “Actually, I wasn’t talking about that. What I was going to say was, that day while I was in the bathroom I was attacked by Bridget. She didn’t hurt me as badly as she did today, but she did threaten me and slapped me across the face, and if it wasn’t for you calling out my name I think she would have beaten me in there, but she stopped when she heard your voice.”

  “Oh, I’m so sorry, Julia. None of this would have happened to you if you and I weren’t friends. Come to think of it, I thought I saw her and two other girls that day, but I wasn’t sure.”

  “I’m not telling you this so you’ll blame yourself. I’m telling you this because I want to be honest with you about everything and hope that we can start new,” I said with a slight smile.

  “Of course, Julia, I wouldn’t have it any other way. You’re stuck with me. I want you to know that I’d do anything for you. You do know this, right?”

  “Yes, I do,” I said, reaching for his hand, but then quickly letting go.

  I could hear Mom calling us. “Crap, Dad’s waiting for us.” So we both jumped up and headed into the living room.

  Chapter Seventeen

  That night Dad informed Alex and me that Principal Joseph had spoken with Bridget’s mom. Apparently, Bridget’s future at the school would be determined when Christmas vacation was over. I still wasn’t sure how I felt about everything. I mean, I didn’t want her to get thrown out of school, but I did think she needed to recognize what she did to me and I’m pretty sure to others in the past.

  Both my parents had given me the option to press charges on Bridget for assault, but I didn’t want to go that far. I thought that there had to be a better way to make my voice be heard, and I shared with my parents why I had strong oppositions about taking legal actions.

  “Mom, Dad, I understand your anger, but I’ll never be able to let it go if you don’t. I do realize you worry about me and I appreciate it so much, but shouldn’t I have a say too? I mean, I am the one who took the beating.”

  Neither one of them said anything for a few minutes. I wanted patiently for one of them to say something. I was really hoping they would let me choose. It wasn’t like I was still a child. I felt like there was a better solution and a better way to speak out for myself and for all the others who had suffered just as I have.

  “Okay, what do you propose, Julia? Let her get away with it?” Dad asked.

  “Well, no, but I don’t think throwing her in jail will solve anything. Besides Bridget being obsessed with Alex, I think there’s more to her and why she’s so angry. I know personally that it’s hard being a teenager. The pressure of making our parents proud, wondering if we’ll fit in at school, peer pressure. The list goes on Dad.”

  “What I’m trying to say is that instead of making things worse, I want to make things better. Making an example of her as a bully isn’t going to change anything. Do you think I’m the only kid in the world that has been bullied? I’m only one out of hundreds; maybe even thousands of kids each year.”

  I waited for my dad to argue his point, but he didn’t. Instead he listened as I continued. I was hoping that somehow as I pleaded my case I’d win. I still wasn’t sure what I could do to make a difference for other kids like me, but I was determined to come up with a plan to make my parents proud and be a voice for others. When I had no more left to say both of my parents rose from the couch and said they’d be back in a few minutes to decide what the verdict would be. Alex and I sat on the couch waiting patiently.

  “I think you’re right, Julia, but that doesn’t mean they will. I think you made a great point, but what is your plan exactly?” Alex asked with curiosity.

  “I’m not sure, but I know I need one before they both come back. Help me think of something,” I asked.

  Alex and I went round and round with ideas. We both agreed that kids our age were probably just misunderstood or were lacking strong family values in the home. “I believe that there’s always a reason why people do bad things. I truly believe that God made us all good. It falls on us to choose whether to remain good. In the case of Bridget, I think maybe she just needs someone to care, someone to show her a better life and a better way to deal with her anger.”

  “What do you think, Alex?”

  “I think you’re right. Not everyone is fortunate to have the life you and I have, Julia. Maybe we need more programs to help kids see the good in themselves, and to show them that they don’t have to bully others to make themselves feel better.”

  “Yes, that’s it. You’re absolutely right, Alex! I also think we need to have a program set up for kids that do bully. Instead of automatically throwing them in jail for assault or expelling them there should be a three strikes you’re out policy.”

  “Okay, but you lost me with the three strikes,” Alex said with a lost look on his face.

  “Alright, I’ll give you an example of what I mean by that. When a kid gets bullied in school by another kid, the bully will automatically have after school detention for two weeks where she or he will have to write an apology letter to the kid who was bullied. Plus they’ll have to spend an hour every day in the councilor’s office, so that maybe the councilor can get to the root of their problem and be able to help them. That would be the first strike.”

  “Second strike would be if they decide to bully someone again, they’ll have in school suspension for two weeks, and have to do twenty hours of community service which they must complete within a thirty day period. They would also be set up with regular appointments to see a professional psychologist to further their progress of getting to the root of the aggressive behavior.”

  “Last strike, they would just be expelled from the school and depending on the case, the bullied child’s parents could press charges if they thought it was necessary.”

  “Wow, you sound like you know just what you’re going to say to your parents. Now, only if you can convince them. Maybe they could help us. Isn’t your mom a lawyer and your dad a state’s attorney? They must have some connections.” Alex did have a point.

  “Yes, I’m sure they do have connections, but it’s not about them. It’s about me, you, and so many others. I think we should do this on our own. Take it to the people,” I said, all excited.

  While Alex laughed at my enthusiasm he said, “Um, Julia, what people? Now, you’ve lost me. I thought this idea was for school.”

  “Yes, it is, but it’s shouldn’t be just about our school. It should be about all schools.”

  Maybe it was me, but I didn’t want to just change the policies in our school, I wanted to change it everywhere. This way it gave other kids hope. Hope for a better tomorrow, for their future in
the world. While I was in my own thoughts, my parents came back in the room to let me know their verdict. I worried they would still perceive me as their little girl and incapable to making my own decisions.

  “All right, Julia, your mom and I have decided to trust you. Whatever you want to do we’ll stand behind you one hundred percent, but…”

  Great, anytime the word “but” came out of my parents mouth I knew I had to make a promise. I didn’t see this going my way. What could they possibly want me to promise?

  “But we need you to promise that you won’t give up, and you’ll continue keep your word by helping other kids. We believe in you, Julia,” Dad said as he leaned over to hug me.

  “Yes, we are proud of you, Julia and of course you too, Alex,” Mom added.

  Knowing that my parents were behind me one hundred percent, Alex and I shared our ideas with them. At first they thought I should start small. They suggested I rally for change in our school system here in New York, but I saw a bigger picture. Both of my parents knew I was serious, so Dad suggested I take my cause to the streets. I wasn’t sure what he meant by that, so I asked him.