by Bec Botefuhr
“Idon’twanttobewithouthim,butI’mscaredtoo.”
“It’soktobescared,honey.Ifitgetstoomuch,atanytime,you knowwhereIam.”
Igrinathimandpullhimcloserforahug.
“Ishegoingtofeedyouthefat?”hewhispers.
Ipunchhisarmandsmotheragiggle.“Quinn,that’sgross!”
“Itisfat,isn’tit?God,tellmehe’swellhung?I’dbehorrifiedifhe hadatinyone.”
Irollmyeyesandtakehishand,pullinghimtothedancefloor.
Whenwe’redancingslowlytogether,Iwhisper,“It’sbig.”
Hesquealshappily.“Howbig?Sixinches?Ohoh,nine?”
Ichuckle.“Ihaven’tmeasuredit,Quinn.”
“It’snine.”
Mycheeksflameredandastrangledgaspleavesmythroatasthe soundofMarcus’sexyvoicefillsmyears.OhsweetJesus,heheardus.
Someonekillmenow.Iwishthefloorwouldjustopenupandswallow me.Quinnstaresblankly,thenburstsoutlaughingandreachesaroundme toshakeMarcus’hand.Idon’twanttoturn,mycheeksareburningred andIamhorriblyembarrassed,Ican’tbelieveheheardmetalkingabout hispartsinapublicplace.Jesus.
“Quinn,goodtomeetyouofficially,lasttimewasn’tsogreat,eh?”
Quinnchuckles.
IturnwithredcheeksandfaceanamusedMarcus.Hegivesmea devilishsmilethenturnsbacktoQuinnandnods.“Nicetomeetyoutoo, itseemsweknowalotabouteachothernow.”
Quinngrinsandletsmego.“Wedo.I’mgoingtogetadrink.You twokidsdanceandenjoyyourselves.Oh…andMarcus…nice…”
IflushagainasQuinnnodshisheadinapprovalatMarcus’nineinch comment.MarcuschucklesandwhenQuinnwalksaway,hegripsmy hipsandspinsmeintohimforadance.IlookintohisbrowndepthsandI canstillfeelmycheeksflaming.Ican’tbelieveheheardmesaythat.
“Wouldyouliketomeasureitsoyou’resurerofyouranswernext time,MissWalters?”
Igivehimasourlookandhegrins,sweepingastraystrandofhair frommyface.
“That’snotfunny,”Igrumble.
Hesmiles.“JustanotherthingIhavetopunishyouforlater.”
Ipoutandlookupathim.“You’renotgoingtogoeasyonme,are you?”
“No,sweetgirl.”
“Butyouswearyouwon’thurtme?”
“Iswearandbesides,youhaveasafeword.Youknowyoucan alwaysuseit,andI’llalwaysstopwhenyoudo.I’dneverhurtyou, Sierra.”
Inod,andwemoveslowlyacrossthedancefloor.
“So,haveyouresumedstudying?”heasks.
Ilookawayandflush.WhatdoIsaytohim?Ihavebeenwallowing inmybedforfivedaysandsulking?No,Ican’ttellhimIoverreacted insteadofactinglikeamatureadultandspeakingtohim.Itwouldhave savedmesomuchheartache.Ilookbackupathimandsmile.
“Yes.”
Henarrowshiseyes.“That’sthree.”
“What?”
“ThreethingsIhavetopunishyoufor.”
Igape,“Forstudying?”
“Forlyingaboutstudying.”
Dammit.Howdidheknow?Themanisfartoogoodatreading people.
“I…washurtingok?”
“Soyoushouldhavesaidthat.”
“I…fine…I’msorry.”
“Now,I’llaskagain,haveyouresumedyourstudying?”
“Asshole.”
Hesmirks.“Don’tbefeistybaby,I’monlyasking.”
“Hasanyoneevertoldyou,thatyouhaveapersonalitydisorder?”
Hissmilewidensandhelookstrulydevastating.“Allthetime.”
“Well,youshouldlisten.”
“Marcus,thereyouare.”
WeturntofaceRose,shesmilesatmeandIgivehermybestsmile back.
“Sierra,howareyou?Areyourfamilyproblemsallsorted?”
MarcusmusthavetoldRosethatIquitbecauseoffamilyproblems.I amgratefultohimforthat,becausehewasprotectingmeevenwhenhe didn’tneedto.
“Yes,thankyou.”
“It’sashameyoucouldn’tcontinuewiththejob,areyousureyou don’twantitback?”
Ishakemyhead.Eventhoughthejobwasgreat,itwasfartooclose tothedramaforme.
“Ohno,it’sok,Ireallydoneedtofocusonmystudiesagain.”
“Areyougoingtotakeanotherjobwhileyoufinishyourfinalyear?”
sheasks.
“Yes,Ithinkso.Ijustdon’tknowwhere.”
Marcusisgivingmealook.Iknowhewantsmetogobackbythe expressiononhisface,butheneedstounderstandIcan’t.Idon’twantto goback,it’sjusttooriskyandworkingsoclosetohimisreallynota goodthing.
“Wellgoodluck,”shesaystome,thenturnstoMarcus.“Sir,we havesomepeoplewantingtospeakwithyou.”
Marcusnodsatherandthenturnstome.“We’regoingtotalkabout thatjob.”
“Marcus…”
“Later,Sierra.”
HeturnsandwalksoffwithRose.Goddammedstubbornman!
~*~*~*~*
SIERRA
ImeetMarcusoutbacknearhislimoateightsharp,asrequested.
Whenheopensthedoorforme,Islideinacrossthecoolleather.Marcus slidesinbesidemeandordersthedrivertotakehimhometohis apartment.Then,heturnstome.Hereachesupandgripstheclipsinmy hair,pullingandlettingthesoftlocksspilloverhisfingersashetangles themthroughmyhairandbringsmeclosertohisslightlypartedlips.
“Sierra,Ihavebeenachingallnighttotouchyou.”
Iswallowandmeethisgaze,thenturnmyeyesdowntowatchashis fingersslideupanddownmythigh.
“Ithoughtyouweregoingtopunishme,sir?”Iwhisper,focusingmy gazeonhislips.
“Oh,Iam,butI’mgoingtofuckyoufirst.”
Iswallowandlickmylips,Ican’thelpit.Marcusputsahandonmy chest,gentlypushingmebackwards,ashelayshisbodyontopofmine.
Thefeelingofthecoolleatheragainstmyskinmakesmewhimper slightly,it’ssodamnedcold.Marcusgripsmythigh,slidingitupover hiship.Hethenrunshisfingersdownthesmoothskinonmyleg,taking mydresswiththem.Whenhefindsmyass,heclutchesitandtiltsmy hipsup,forcingmyachingclefttorideagainstthecockthat’sstraining sohardagainsthispants,Ihavenodoubtithurts.
“Howdoyouwantthis,baby?”herasps.
“Justfuckme.Ijustneedyoutofuckme.”
“That’smygirl,”hegrowls.
Hefindsmypantiesandgentlyrunsafingerupanddownthesilky material,causingmypussytoacheforhim.Hegripstheelasticandpulls itaside,revealingmyachingfleshtohishungryeyes.Heslipshisfinger intomyheatandgroansdeeply,slidingitinandout,andthenpullingit completelyoutandslippingitintohismouth.Iwhimperattheerotic sightofhimlickingmyarousaloffhisfinger.
“Youtastesofuckinggood,”hegrowls.“I’vemissedyou,Sierra.”
“Please,”Iwhimper.“Don’tmakemewait.”
“Idon’tplanto.”
Hegripshispants,yankingthetopbuttonopenandpullingthem downtoreleasehisbeautiful,hard,longcock.Ireachoutforit,desperate tofeelmyfingersclosingaroundtherigidlengthbuthestopsme.
“Youtouchme,andthiswillgetruined,forusboth.”
Iwhimperashebeginstostrokethehardlength,Iwatchasadropof pre-cumdripsdownandslidesoverthelong,lengthyshaftuntilitfinds histightballs.Goddamn.HemovesmyhipssoI’mopentohim,thenhe presseshiscocktomyentrance,slidingjustthetipin.Isquirm,feeling thestretchinganddesperatethrobbingasheteasesmewithwhatIknowI need.Herotateshiships,lettinghisheadslidearoundinsideme,not enoughtoreachthatspotandget
meoff.
“Marcus,”Icryout,grippinghisheadandtanglingmyfingers throughhishair,bringinghislipstomine.
Hekissesmesohungrilyittakesmybreathaway.Thewayhemoves histongue,thewayhislipsjustfitminesoperfectly,it’sallsomind blowing.Withadeeprumble,heslideshiscockinsideme,fillingand stretchingmesopainfullyandyetsoperfectly.Itaketighterholdofhis hair,tuggingthethickstrandsuntilhislipsarecrushedagainstmineand Icantastehim,ohthattaste,I’vemissedthattaste.I’vemissed everythingabouthim.Everytouch,everysmile,everyperfectthingthat isMarcusHarrison.
“Youhaveagreedylittlepussy,Sierra.Icanfeelitallaroundme.”
Herockshiships,slidinghiscockcompletelyoutbeforeplungingit backin,causingascreamtoslidefrommythroat.Igriphishairharder, titlingmyhipsuptotakeeveryhard,beautifulthrust.Hismouthisonmy neck,hishandisgrippingmythighandhiscockisfillingmesodeeply,I canfeelitpressingdeepinsideme.Ishudderandconvulseasmyrelease buildshigherandhigher,bringingmeclosertotheedgethatIso desperatelywanttojumpoff.Marcusgroans,hishipsthrashharderand hisbreathingbecomesdesperateanddeep.
WhenIfinallycome,it’ssopowerfulmywholebodyshakesand tremblesaroundhimasheridesmeharder,hisballsslappingagainstmy pantiesashepowerstowardshisown,muchneeded,release.Whenhe findsit,hisgutturalmoanhasmybodycomingtolife.Icanfeelevery pulseashegentlyusesmybodytorubouthisreleaseuntilwe’reboth completelysatisfied.Webothcamefartooquickly,butIputthatdownto desperationandneed.Iknownexttime,he’llmakeitawholelotharder formetofindthatmuchneededrelease.Iknowhe’llbringoutthe dominantsideIhavelearnedtoneedsodesperately.
“God,Sierra,I’vemissedyou,”hemurmursintomyhair.
“Metoo,”Iwhisper,pressingmyfacetohischestandinhaling.
“Staywithmetonight,please?”
“Ok.”
It’snotevenaquestionIneedtoaskmyself.I’vebeenwithout MarcusandIknowonethingforsure…
Idon’twanttodoitagain.
CHAPTER4
SIERRA
MarcustakesmebacktotheapartmentIwokeupinallthoseweeks ago,whenIthoughtI’dgonehomewithastranger.Asexpected,it’s perfectlysetout,tidyandI’mfairlysure,sparkling.Marcustakesmy hand,leadingmeintothekitchenandflickingonthelight.Mylegsare painfullytinglyandmycleftispainfullyawareofhim.Whenhepullsoff hissuitjacketandpresentsmewithawhitebuttonupshirtpulledfirmly acrossthatdivinechest,Ican’thelpbutlickmylips.He’ssogoddamned edible.Henoticesmystareandsmirks.
“Tenminutes,andyou’rereadytogoagain?”
Igrinandstepforward,puttingmyhandsonhishardchestand runningmyfingertipsdownthehardplanes.Hegripsmywrists,smiling downatme.Hisdarkgazesearchesmyfaceashestepscloser,puttinghis bodyupagainstmine.Heswipesastrandofhairfrommyforeheadand whispers,“Sierra,wedohavetotalksomemore.Whatwetalkedabout tonightwasonlytouchingthesubject.Idon’twantyourunningfromme again,becausewejumpedbackintothiswithoutsortingitalloutfirst.”
“Youwanttotalknow?”Isay,shocked.
“Ithinkit’simportantwegooverthisbeforewetakethingsany further,don’tyou?”
Ohreally?Hetellsmethisafterhefucksmeinthebackofhislimo.
Ipullmywristsfromhishands,alittlehurtthathe’sgettingallserious now.Hecouldhavespokentomeonthewayhome,insteadhechoseto fuckmeandwaituntilwegothereandnowhe’stellingmeit’stimeto getserious.
“Whydidn’twetalkinthecar?Itdidn’tseemtobeonyourmind then.”
Hisgazehardens.“See,thisisexactlywhatI’mtalkingabout.
You’resnappingatmeovernothing.That’sbecauseyou’restillangryat me.Weneedtotalkaboutwhathappened,sowedon’tcarryitaround.”
“Ithoughtyouweregoingtopunishmeforwhathappened?”Iretort.
“Isn’tthathowyouwork,Marcus?Don’tyoujustwanttospankme,fuck meandmoveon?”
Hismouthformsahardlineandherunsahandthroughhishair.“Is thatwhatyoureallythinkofme,Sierra?”
“Yes,sometimesitis.You’reheretellingmeyouwanttotalktome, afteryougotyourrocksoffinthelimoonlytenminutesago.Wherewas the‘serious’talkthen,Marcus?”
“Gotmyrocksoff?”hesays,inanangrytone.“Really?”
“Well,thatseemedfirstonyourtodolistearlierandnowyouwant to,”Imakeairquotes.“Talk.”
“Growup,Sierra.YouwantedthatasmuchasIdid.”
I’mbeingchildish,believemewhenIsayIknowthis,butIdon’t care.I’mangryandhurtandyeah,he’sprobablyright,wereallydoneed totalkaboutwhathappenedbecauseit’sstillpinchingaspotdeep,deep inmychest.Iclosemyeyes,tryingtogathersomecalm.WhenIopen them,Marcusisstaringatthewall,hisfaceamassofanger.
“Fine,”Ihuff.“Whatdoyouwanttotalkabout?”
“I’mnottalkingtoyouwhileyou’reactinglikeachild.”
Igape.“Areyouserious,Marcus?Youjustthrewitouttherethat youwanttotalkwhenItriedtolayamoveonyou.Itwasokforyouto layyourmoveonmeearlier,butnowit’snot?”
“Webothwantedthat,”herepeats.
“Fine,whatever.I’mgoinghome,Idon’tneedthiscrapallover again.Youcanneverseewhatyou’redoingwrongandI’mnotgoingto putupwithitconstantly.Youhaveangerissues,youseriouslydo.”
Igripmypurseandstormtowardsthedoor,buthe’stherebeforeI eventakethreesteps.Heblocksmypathandputshishandsup,ina gestureoftruce.“I’msorry,baby,ok?”
“Idon’twanttofacewhathappened,”Ihalfyell,“becauseIdon’t wanttothinkmaybethisisn’treal.”
“Youdon’tthinkI’mserious?”hesays,loweringhishands.
“Lessthanaweekago,youtoldmeyouwouldn’thurtChayne.Now, suddenly,you’reokwithit.”
“Iwasn’tokwithitthenbecauseIhadachoice,whenyouwalked out,youmadethechoiceformeandIrealizedIwaswrong.Losingyou, Sierra,mademeseethatwehavesomethingthatChayneandIneverhad.
Ididn’trealizeituntilyouwalkedouthowmuchthatmeanttome.Then IwasforcedtodecideforrealandIknewwhichwayIwouldswing.
Chaynemadeherbed,nowshehastolieinit.Idon’twanttohurther, thathasn’tchanged,butIwon’tloseyouagain.”
ImeethisgazeandIcanseethetruthinhisbrowndepths.
“Youhurtme,Marcus,whatyoudidwithChayneandwhatyouknew aboutmebeforeyouemployedme…”
“Iknow,”hewhispers.“Idon’tknowwhatIcandotofixthat.”
“Canyoujusttellmewhy?”Isay,meetinghisgaze.
“Look,IheardwhathappenedandIsawapictureofyouandIfelt…I don’tknow…Ifeltsomething.Ifeltapull.Isawyou’dbeenhurt.Iknew rightawaywhattheinjurieswereandIwasinsuchabadplace,Ithought Icouldhelpyou.Idon’tknowwhyIeverputyouinthatposition,andfor thatI’msorry.”
“Idon’twanttofeellikeaproject,Marcus.”
“Baby,”hewhispers.“You’llneverbeaprojecttome.”
“Iknow,”Isay,droppingmyhead.
Hestepsforward.“Tellmewhatyouwantmetodotomakethis better,I’lldoanything.”
“Ijustwantyoutopromisemethisisreal,”Iwhisper.
Hegripsmyface.“It’sreal,Iswearittoyou.Iwantyou,Sierra,I wanteverypartofyouwithme,everydaythatIcanhaveyou.Ipromise todomybestnottohurtyouagain.”
Inod,meetinghisgaze.“Thenwhatistheretotalkabout?”
Hestrokesmycheek.“Promisemesomet
hing?”
“Anything.”
“Youwon’trunfrommeagain?Ifyou’reeverhurting,youtalkto mefirst.”
“Ipromise.”
“ThenIguesswe’redonetalking.”
“Yousaidyouwantedtopunishmeforrunning?”Isay,meetinghis gaze.
“Yes,”hemurmurs,lookingatmylips.
“Iwanttopunishyouforhurtingme,socanwemakea compromise?”
Henarrowshiseyes.“Ok?”
“Iwanttochoosehowweplaythisout.Iwanttopickmy punishment.Iwantyoutogivemethecontroltonight.Thisway,we’re bothgettingsomethingoutofit.”
Herunshishandsthroughhishairandlooksawayamoment,when hiseyesmeetmineagain,hesaysinafirm,cleartone.“Ok,pickyour punishment.Whatisityouwant?”
Iswallow,knowingit’stimeIfacedmyfears.Inasmall,fragile voiceIsay.“Iwanttosubmittoyou,Marcus.Iwantyoutobemy dominantandtodothat,Iwantyoutotiemeup.”
~*~*~*~
SIERRA
I’malmostsureMarcusstandsthereforagoodtenminutesnot sayinganything.Whenhefinallyopenshismouthtospeak,nothing comesout.Iknowhe’sshocked,butit’ssomethingIhavetodofor myself.IneedtofacewhathappenedwithBenandmoveon.Itrust MarcusandIknowit’ssomethingheenjoys,ifwe’retomakeagoodgo ofthis,wehavetobeinittogetherandthatmeansmehonestlygivingita try.Istillhavemylimits,butI’mwillingtolethimtrywhateverhe wantsonme.He’salreadyproventomehewillstopifIusemysafe word.
“Youwanttosubmit?”hemurmurs,inalow,gravellytone.
“Yes.”
“Tome?”
“No,tothedoorman.”
Hechucklesalmostnervously.“Ithoughtyoudidn’twantthat.”
“Ididn’tthinkIdid,butthoselittlethingsyoushowedmebackat theWhiteHouse,mademewanttotryitagain.Itrustyou;Iknowyou won’thurtme.”
Marcusstepsforward,cuppingmycheek.“Sierra,baby,I’dnever hurtyou.”