Idol

by Carrie Duffy

  ‘Zac,’ she said gently. That one word. He looked up, daring to hope. She reached out to him, her fingers brushing his cheek, his nose, his forehead, exploring every inch of him. He was beautiful, his dark eyes smouldering, his strong jaw line firmly set. With a teasingly light touch, Jenna traced the shape of his eyebrow, trailing her fingertips down the side of his face until she reached his lips. Softly, Zac kissed the palm of her hand. Jenna didn’t pull away and he kissed her hand again, more urgently this time. She tasted divine. She drew a finger across his lips, letting it slide into his mouth, and Zac sucked with infinite gentleness, savouring the exquisite taste of her.

  Jenna couldn’t take her eyes off him. She watched, mesmerized, as he slowly kissed the inside of her wrist, her forearm, the sensitive crease just inside her elbow. Her eyelids fluttered, dizzy with desire for him as she gave in to the sensation, allowing it to take over her whole body. Her skin was on fire, every kiss setting off a new explosion deep within her. She felt warmth flood her belly as her stomach contracted, a rush of lust that culminated in a fierce, insistent heat between her thighs.

  Zac moved up to her shoulder, and then her neck, his lips dancing over her skin with exasperating slowness until her whole body ached and the pleasure was almost too much. Her robe slid from her shoulders, the silk slipping lazily over her skin to expose her body. Zac inhaled sharply, unable to believe how beautiful she was. He took her in his arms, gently lying her down on the couch before finally, blissfully, his lips met hers and Jenna’s world exploded. Zac pulled her closer, their bodies moulding together in a fit so perfect they must have been designed for each other. And Jenna knew that nothing was ever going to be the same again.

  36

  ‘Tyrone?’ Sadie asked in disbelief. She was so exhausted that she thought she must be hallucinating. ‘Is it really you?’

  ‘It’s me baby,’ he grinned. He scooped her into his arms and she collapsed against him, held up by the sheer solid wall of his muscular body. He was so tall that he towered above her, looking incredibly handsome in just a casual T-shirt and baggy jeans, a heavy gold chain hanging round his neck.

  ‘Are you okay?’ Tyrone asked worriedly. He could see that she was startled to see him, but it was more than that. Whatever she’d been doing today, she’d obviously had a rough ride.

  ‘Yeah … no … long story. What are you doing here?’ Sadie asked incredulously. She stared up at him, taking in every inch of his face: the soft, brown eyes, the strong, broad nose and the deliciously full lips. His skin was smooth and freshly shaven.

  ‘I wanted to see you,’ Tyrone said simply. ‘I was worried – you disappeared without telling me. And when I want to see you, I don’t take no for an answer. Even if you do run all the way to England to escape me,’ he teased.

  Sadie’s face was a picture of confusion.

  ‘Besides, I told you I’d never been to London. I thought this would be a good opportunity to pay a visit.’

  ‘But … how did you find me?’ she asked in bewilderment. Nothing seemed to be making sense.

  ‘Karl,’ Tyrone explained, in that deep Midwestern burr. ‘He told me which hotel you were staying at. I’ve just been hanging out here in the lobby for the past God knows how many hours, waiting for you to show up.’

  ‘Really?’ Sadie began to giggle.

  ‘Yes, ma’am. That takes dedication, let me tell you. Those fancy seats are damn uncomfortable.’

  Sadie laughed, a rich, throaty sound that bubbled up from deep inside. It felt good – a few hours ago, she wouldn’t have believed she’d find anything to laugh about ever again.

  ‘Oh, and Karl said to tell you that he owed you, but now the debt’s paid back. Does that make sense?’

  A wide grin spread across Sadie’s face. She remembered all too clearly the day she’d agreed to be Jenna Jonsson’s backing dancer, and she knew exactly what Karl was referring to. Abruptly, she pulled Tyrone closer, turning her face up as he bent down to kiss her. She needed that contact. It was as though he was bringing her back to life, that she was slowly becoming human again after the horror of the day.

  Sadie was aware that the handful of people in the lobby were watching them; the receptionist kept glancing up from behind his desk, the other guests staring at them as they passed. They were hardly inconspicuous, she realized – a tiny brunette, dirty and exhausted, hanging on to a huge, black American guy with a booming Ohio accent.

  ‘I’ve missed you,’ she whispered. And she meant it. He made her feel safe, as though nothing could harm her when he was around. After the day – hell, the year – she’d had, she needed that.

  ‘Sadie, I’m crazy about you,’ Tyrone told her, the words spilling out as his eyes raked over her. He couldn’t help himself – as far as he was concerned she looked fantastic, even if she quite obviously needed a shower, a change of clothes, and to sleep for about a week. He’d come all this way to tell her this and it needed to be said.

  ‘I just wanted to let you know that I’m not gonna rush you, or push you into anything. I know you’ve been hurt, but I’m a good guy. I don’t wanna cheat you, or mess you around, or anything else bad like that. I’m prepared to take things slow, let you set the pace. Whatever you want.’

  He looked so honest, his expression so completely sincere, that Sadie suddenly felt close to tears. After everything that had happened today, she knew she could finally forget about Paul Austin – put what he’d done to her out of her mind forever and move on. The future was limitless; she didn’t need her past holding her back.

  ‘You know what?’ she began thoughtfully. ‘I’m tired of taking things slow. I think I’m ready to speed it up a little.’

  She grinned at him. Tyrone caught her meaning and smiled back, that slow, lazy smile that she loved so much, before he bent down and kissed her passionately. This time no one could fail to notice – everyone in the lobby was staring at them. Sadie didn’t care. All she knew was that Tyrone’s skin on hers, his lips pressed against her lips, his tongue exploring her mouth, it all felt completely right, completely comfortable.

  Sadie pulled away, smiling up at him as she took his hand. Their fingers linked together, her tiny hand enveloped by his huge one, as she drew him across the lobby and to the lift. She’d been waiting for this moment for a long time; one look at Tyrone’s handsome face, that sexy smile and that amazingly hot body, and Sadie knew it was all going to be worth it.

  When Jenna woke up the following day, the first thing she realized was that she was happy. She stretched languorously, luxuriating in a deep contentment she hadn’t felt for a long time.

  As she rolled over and saw Zac beside her she smiled, suddenly understanding the reason for her blissed-out state. He was still sleeping, his slim, muscular body naked beneath the white cotton sheet. His lips were parted as he breathed deeply, his face relaxed. With the slightest of movements, Jenna leaned across and kissed the curve of his shoulder. Zac stirred in his sleep, but didn’t wake.

  Reaching over to the bedside table, Jenna picked up her BlackBerry and scrolled lazily through the numbers, hitting the call button as she found the one she wanted. There was no reply; it rang, then went through to voicemail. Jenna hung up without leaving a message.

  She shivered deliciously as she felt a hand gently stroking her back, fingers lazily running up and down her spine. Zac was slowly waking up, his eyes sleepy and his dark hair falling stubbornly onto his forehead.

  ‘Hey you,’ he greeted her.

  ‘Hey,’ Jenna giggled, unable to stop the grin breaking across her face.

  Zac pulled her close and they kissed deeply, their bodies instinctively finding each other as their limbs twined together.

  ‘Who are you calling so early?’ Zac teased.

  ‘It’s not early. You slept so late it’s almost lunchtime,’ Jenna smiled. ‘I was trying to get hold of Sadie. I just wanted to check she’s okay and find out if she’s heard anything.’

  ‘How do you know this girl again? S
he was one of your backing dancers, right?’

  ‘Not exactly.’ Jenna crinkled her nose as she tried to explain. ‘That’s sort of why I need to speak to her. I need to apologize – tell her I was wrong about a few things. I’ve made some bad decisions lately.’

  ‘And now you’re making some good ones.’

  ‘Starting right now,’ Jenna grinned, as she leaned over to kiss him again.

  Sadie arrived at the hospital hidden behind a large bunch of flowers, a gloriously vivid bouquet of freesias, daisies and summer roses. She’d been told Angela was well enough for visitors, but was still nervous about what she might find. To her relief, Angela was sitting up in bed, flicking through a magazine. She was attached to a drip, her face pale and drained, but she smiled when she saw Sadie.

  ‘Sadie.’ Her voice sounded weak. ‘I’m so glad you came.’

  ‘It was the least I could do. How are you doing?’

  ‘I’m fine,’ Angela said wearily. ‘Well, maybe not fine, but I will be. I didn’t know if you’d have a chance to visit – aren’t you flying back today?’

  ‘Yeah.’ Sadie checked her watch. ‘In a few hours, so I can’t stay long, but I wanted to see you. See how you were.’

  ‘Thanks.’

  ‘No problem.’

  ‘And thanks for the flowers. They’re beautiful.’

  ‘I hoped they might cheer up the room. Hospitals are never fun,’ Sadie chattered on, trying to keep her tone light as she got up to find a vase. ‘And how are you coping with … everything.’

  There was a long pause before Angela spoke. ‘I’m okay. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking.’

  ‘Yeah?’

  ‘Yeah. I’m going to resign from Willis & Bourne.’

  Sadie nodded. She wasn’t surprised.

  ‘It wasn’t the right place for me,’ Angela continued. ‘They’ve offered to move me to another section – anywhere I want – but I’d rather just leave. There are too many bad memories associated with it.’

  ‘I don’t blame you.’

  ‘I need to start living my life for me, to stop daydreaming and really get out there and make something of myself. I’m thinking about studying – I’d like to go to university and get my degree. Maybe go on holiday too. It’s a long time since I went away – I never like to go on my own. But now – well, life’s too short, isn’t it? And then one day, perhaps, I’ll find a nice man.’

  Sadie smiled. ‘I’m sure you will.’

  ‘I’m going to take one day at a time. Everything will happen when it’s ready to.’

  ‘That sounds like a good philosophy,’ Sadie grinned. Her phone began to ring and she pulled it out of her bag. ‘It’s Jenna,’ she explained. ‘I’m going to take it. Good luck, Angela.’ Sadie reached across the bed to hug her.

  ‘Thanks, Sadie. You too.’

  Sadie slipped out of the door and answered her phone.

  ‘Sadie!’ Jenna exclaimed. ‘I’ve been trying to get through to you all morning.’

  ‘Sorry, I’ve been a little busy.’

  ‘Are you okay?’ Jenna asked anxiously.

  ‘I’m fine,’ Sadie assured her.

  ‘What about Angela? Have you heard anything?’

  ‘I’ve just left the hospital. I wanted to see her before I fly back.’

  ‘How is she?’

  ‘Physically, she’ll be fine. Mentally … I think it’ll take her a little longer to recover. She’s been through a hell of a lot. She needs to move on, start rebuilding her life now.’

  ‘I hope she’ll be okay,’ Jenna said genuinely.

  ‘So do I. And what about you?’ Sadie asked, changing the subject. ‘Do you know if you’ll get your money back?’

  ‘I spoke to my lawyer last night. He thinks I have a pretty solid case for getting everything back. The company won’t want the scandal if I go public. Chances are they’ll offer to refund the whole amount directly, or assign me a new advisor and we can start from scratch.’

  ‘What are you going to do?’

  ‘Take the money and run!’ Jenna smiled. ‘I think that’s the end of my venture into high finance.’

  ‘Hey, you live and learn, right?’

  ‘Absolutely,’ Jenna agreed. There was a long pause and Jenna knew she couldn’t put it off any longer. ‘Look, Sadie, the reason I was calling … I just wanted to apologize for what I said before. About the Nationals and everything. I know it should have been you, and—’

  Sadie cut her off. ‘It doesn’t matter now, Jenna. Like you said, it was years ago.’

  ‘It does matter,’ Jenna insisted. She needed to say it. ‘I think I always knew I couldn’t have really won, but I didn’t want to believe it. The arrogance of youth,’ she smiled wryly. ‘But how did you know? I mean, about my mother and—’

  ‘I saw them together. They made quite an odd couple.’

  Jenna pulled a face. ‘He came out to LA, you know. Dickie Masters. My mother made me call him Uncle Dickie for a while.’

  ‘Uncle Dickie?’ Sadie burst out. She began to snigger, collapsing into helpless giggles that were impossible to contain as Jenna joined in, realizing just how absurd it sounded. The two of them laughed uncontrollably, deep, belly laughs bordering on hysteria. It was a welcome release after the emotion of the past few days.

  Jenna wiped her eyes as their laughter faded, steeling herself for the next confession. There was still one more thing she needed to say. ‘Nick,’ she began awkwardly. ‘I know you were telling the truth about him …’ Jenna closed her eyes, hoping it would make it less real. ‘I found him with someone else.’

  ‘Ouch,’ Sadie winced. ‘What a bastard.’

  ‘Yeah,’ Jenna agreed. ‘He’s a lying, cheating piece of shit. You know all about those, right?’

  ‘Mmmm, but I’m getting over them,’ Sadie smiled. ‘I’m making some good choices for a change.’ She strolled across the hospital car park to where Tyrone was waiting in the back of their chauffeured car. Their bags were packed and in the boot, ready to go straight to the airport.

  ‘Me too,’ agreed Jenna. ‘I think it’s important to find someone who loves me for me, and not for any other reasons.’

  ‘You know, you should drop by if you’re ever in Vegas,’ Sadie suggested. ‘I’m sure I can comp you some tickets for the Kandy Girls,’ she finished cheekily.

  ‘I might just do that,’ Jenna grinned.

  ‘Make sure you do. Take care, Jenna.’

  ‘You too. Bye Sadie.’

  Sadie hung up, climbing into the car and leaning over to kiss Tyrone. He threw an arm around her shoulders and they held hands as the car drove off. She felt loved, protected. It was a good feeling.

  At the other end of phone, Jenna put down her mobile and took a long, cleansing breath. Almost instantly she felt the pressure lift from her shoulders, knowing that she could put this whole episode behind her. She’d been working so hard for so long – she would speak to Gerry, let him know that she needed some time off. For once she had something she cared about other than work, a reason to take her foot off the gas and take a break to do what she wanted. Zac had been talking about going travelling. Jenna thought that sounded good. Dropping out of the public eye for a while and seeing the world. She’d had enough of all that celebrity bullshit – for a while at least. Gerry could stay behind and mastermind the next big comeback …

  Jenna rolled over to face Zac. She slipped her arms around him, pulling him to her.

  ‘Are you sure you want to do this?’ Zac asked softly, searching her face, his deep brown eyes drinking in her own dazzling green ones. ‘You and me?’

  Jenna giggled nervously. ‘I don’t know. I don’t want to get a reputation as some Yoko Ono type.’

  Zac shook his head sadly. ‘No, Phoenix is completely over now – and it’s not your fault. We should have put it to bed months ago.’ Then he brightened. ‘But if we had, I wouldn’t have got to meet such an amazing woman.’ He wasn’t lying; Jenna looked sensational, all long, slim
legs and pert cleavage. He couldn’t keep his hands off her.

  ‘But what are people going to say?’ Jenna asked anxiously, as she curled her body around him, pressing against him in the way that he loved.

  Zac shrugged. ‘Who cares?’

  ‘Everyone already thinks I’ve slept with two of the band members. This is going to look terrible – I’m the ultimate groupie.’

  ‘Well, you know what they say.’ Zac couldn’t resist teasing her. ‘Third time lucky.’ He pulled her into his arms, kissing her deeply.

  Jenna kissed him back. As she felt his strong arms clasp tightly around her, felt the fireworks exploding all over her body, she knew he was right. This was the one.

  ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

  To Kate, Victoria, Sarah, Elinor and the whole team at HC for being so welcoming and guiding me through this process!

  To my fantastic agent, Maddie Buston at Darley Anderson, for invaluable edits and support, and to Caroline Kirkpatrick for picking me off the slush pile.

  To everyone who believed in me on the long, hard slog to get here – you know who you are.

  And to Ross, for believing in me most of all.

  About the Author

  IDOL

  Carrie Duffy grew up in North Yorkshire before moving to Paris at the age of eighteen. After studying PPE at Trinity College, Oxford, she trained as an actress. She has worked professionally as both an actor and dancer, and she currently lives in west London. Idol is her first novel.

  Visit www.AuthorTracker.com for exclusive information on your favorite HarperCollins authors.

  Copyright

  This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.