Black Sun Light My Way

by Spurrier, Jo

  ‘It won’t come to that,’ Mira said, still speaking calmly as she blotted her eyes with her sleeve. ‘Our alliance with the empire applies only to the Spire and the Wolf Lands, and if we don’t keep the king content it will all be lost to the Blood-Mages anyway.’

  ‘You don’t need to do this,’ Cam said. ‘Rasten won’t leave without Sierra. Mira, you can’t go. Stay here: we can protect you. With Sierra at your back they can’t force you to do anything —’

  ‘I have to —’

  ‘No! I won’t let you!’ All of a sudden he realised he was shouting and that his belly had tightened into a hard and painful knot. ‘Curse it, what do you think they’ll do to you? Your clan may not care what happens to you, but I do!’

  Mira buried her face in her hands and sobbed. ‘I knew you’d say that,’ she said through her tears. ‘Cam, please stop, please don’t tempt me further. I can’t stay, you must see that.’

  ‘Of course you can! What are they going to do, send troops to drag you out?’

  ‘I wish it were as simple as that —’

  ‘It is! It’s exactly as simple as that. Tell them you won’t go. Sierra will back you up; she won’t let anything happen to you.’ Cam gripped the arms of her chair, clenching until his knuckles turned white, torn between the desire to wrap her up in his arms and keep her safe and the urge to storm at and attack those who would take her from him.

  ‘I can’t defy my clan. You don’t understand — you’ve never had a clan of your own, not properly. You don’t know what you’re asking.’

  ‘Don’t I?’ he said. ‘My blood kin may have turned their backs on me, but I did have a clan — the one that chose me.’

  ‘And you lost them!’ Mira said. ‘After your and Issey’s struggle without kin to support you, you ask me to lead that life? How could I, when I see what it cost you?’ She drew her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them, trying to compose herself.

  Cam knelt at her side. ‘Mira, we can protect you —’

  ‘How?’ she demanded. ‘You and Issey could barely keep yourselves fed and clothed without my help. Sierra has more power than I can comprehend, but how long would she last down here without allies? Alone, she’s as helpless as anyone else with no home and no family.’

  ‘Mira, you can’t marry Osebian. Mesentreian lords treat their women scarcely better than the Akharians treat their slaves —’

  Mira shook her head. ‘You needn’t fear that. He can’t raise a hand to me without violating the terms of the betrothal.’

  ‘But behind closed doors —’

  ‘There will be no closed doors! It’s all written into the contract. I’ll have kin present at all times. He will not be permitted to mistreat me. It won’t be pleasant, but it’s far better than what the women endured in the slave camps.’

  Cam turned away, raking his hands through his hair. ‘This is wrong. It sickens me that your own mother agreed to this. It’s never been the Ricalani way, to barter a woman to bind a treaty —’

  ‘Cam, I don’t like it either, but we must move with the times if we are to survive,’ Mira said. ‘Should we cling to our traditions at the expense of our future? We can’t hold ourselves aloof from the rest of the world. Perhaps we must bring mages of our own back if we want to be safe from Valeria and Kell — if we want our children to live in Ricalan and not a new province of the empire — but great achievements require great sacrifices, and this is my part to play.’

  ‘But with this Akharian alliance in the offing, Tarya must see the king will hold you hostage against them,’ Cam said. ‘They’re putting your head on the block!’

  ‘My clan would never put me in danger,’ she said.

  ‘Fires Below, Mira, it was their fault you were captured by the Akharians! Have you forgotten that?’

  ‘That was an accident! Uncle Dremman couldn’t have known we’d run into those scouts —’ She broke off to glare at him. ‘And what do you expect will happen if I don’t present myself as promised? We’ve already risked one rebellion —’

  ‘That’s right, so what’s one more?’ Cam said. ‘If the Wolf makes a bid to overthrow the king, every clan in Ricalan will raise their banner to the call —’

  ‘Kell would destroy them! At best we will exchange Mesentreian overlords for Akharian, and at worst half Ricalan will be dead and the rest enslaved! And what if I do refuse? The clan would have to send another in my place — one of my sisters or my cousins! You remember my little sister Bekara, don’t you? She’s just sixteen this year. Would you have her delivered into Osebian’s bedchamber in my place? Or into the bed of some Akharian noble?’

  ‘They wouldn’t do such a thing,’ Cam said.

  ‘They would if it would prevent the deaths of thousands. My clan raises no cowards: we all know the price the Gods demand for the privilege of our birth. There’s not one of us who wouldn’t sacrifice herself for the sake of her people. Cam, I know this pains you, but there is no other way. I believe Sierra will bring us through, but she needs time, far more than we can give her by stalling the negotiations. Marrying Osebian will get the king off our backs, for a few years if we’re lucky. Cam, please just let me do what I must. Please don’t make it harder.’

  ‘We can find another way —’

  ‘There is no other way!’ She covered her face with her hands. ‘When the agreement was signed the elders said I should break this off with you right away, that you’d only make trouble. Please don’t prove them right. Please, I’m begging you.’

  Tears flooded down her cheeks, but Cam folded his arms and held himself rigid. He didn’t trust himself to offer comfort when he really wanted to shake some sense into her. ‘When?’ he asked.

  ‘I’ll stay until the wretched Akharians make their inspection. That should be time enough to see Sierra continues to get everything she needs. I can’t delay much longer than that.’

  Isidro hesitated on the landing at the end of Nirveli’s chamber. The voices rang down clearly from the room above, and he felt as though his own heart was being torn in two. Even after all they’d been through, Cam was still his little brother. When he’d first arrived in the Owl’s lodge, the six-year-old prince spoke only Mesentreian and was afraid of everything. Shepherding the useless lump around had seemed a punishment, but the chieftain was implacable — it was Isidro’s duty to treat Cam like a brother. The lone fair-haired child among the dark-headed Ricalanis learnt the language and the way of life in the Owl Clan’s run-down halls, and grew fearless and bold. By the end of that year Isidro couldn’t imagine life without his new brother; and even after all these years, his father’s command rang loud in his ears. It was his duty to look after Cam.

  And now Cam was getting his heart ripped out by the woman he loved, and every fibre of Isidro’s being wanted to run up there and defend him.

  It was forbidden. Matters of the heart were strictly private. So long as no one raised a hand in anger he had no right to interfere, according to the same customs that prevented violence among people who lived several couples to a family and might be trapped together for weeks during a blizzard. All he could do was wait until it finished, and be nearby to help pick up the pieces.

  He couldn’t just stand here listening, either, so he forced himself to start down the steps, heading for the dampening chamber.

  He’d barely taken a step when blue light flared up from below, creeping around the spiralling staircase. Sierra’s power throbbed, rolling through him like a wave. It seemed to wash his legs out from beneath him, and his knees buckled. His breath caught in his chest, as though he had a broken rib that protested every time he breathed deeply. He felt her coming towards him, trailing power that snapped and hissed like rain on hot stone.

  From above, Isidro heard Cam make one last plea, but the words were lost in the echoing crackle of Sierra’s flooding power. There was someone descending, and from the short, quick stride he guessed it was Mira.

  She came around the curve to the landing and gla
red at him, and he realised he must look like an eavesdropper, flattened against the wall in guilty surprise, but when she looked at him more closely, she frowned. ‘Issey —’

  Then Sierra appeared, blazing with light and power, eyes hard with anger. ‘Have I heard this right?’ Sierra demanded. ‘You’re leaving us?’

  Mira flinched, and when she caught herself Isidro noticed she pressed the heel of her hand against her chest. ‘That’s right,’ she said, fighting to keep her voice steady. ‘I have a duty and I will not shirk it, however unpleasant it may be. I’m sure you understand that.’

  Sierra narrowed her eyes. ‘So you’re going to leave your friends and allies and surrender yourself into the hands of your enemies? You’re a fool. A complete and utter fool.’

  Mira recoiled as though she’d been slapped. ‘How dare you speak to me —?’

  ‘How dare you abandon us when we need you?!’

  ‘Hold your wretched tongue!’ Mira shouted. ‘You’ve done this same thing, not just once, but twice! You left your family when Kell came for you, and you left Cam and my clan to hide among the slaves! How dare you scorn me when you’ve done the very same thing? I’m doing this for you, you wretch, so you can flout the laws and learn your craft, and you curse me for it? Black Sun take you, you selfish cow! There are lives at stake here, and if you can’t see that you’re not half the woman I thought you were!’ With that, Mira turned on her heel and stalked away, leaving Sierra spluttering with rage.

  Isidro pressed against the wall, struggling for breath. His legs buckled, and he sprawled across the cold granite steps.

  ‘Isidro!’

  Cam had started down when he heard the argument, and as he saw Isidro slump he bounded down to catch him. ‘Sierra, get yourself under control!’ he barked at her.

  Sierra had her back to them both, still staring after Mira with her power spilling in crackling strands, spinning around her in an ominous dance. It seemed to Isidro that the chamber lights had dimmed, but he couldn’t be sure if it was only his vision fading for want of air. Nirveli’s screen, which had been blank during the exchange, now bore a strange, speckled field of light playing across the stone, strongest near to Sierra and fading with distance.

  Cam’s shout startled her, and her power flooded, spilling over like a bursting dam. That fresh wave hit Isidro and now he couldn’t breathe at all, as though he was crushed under a great weight of stone. The enchantments bound to his arm were growing hot, and as the power surged he felt them collapse, imploding one by one with a muffled pop.

  Cam grabbed him by the shoulders and peered into his face. ‘Shit,’ he said and strode to Sierra.

  She had turned towards them, but her eyes were wide and sightless. Cam reached through the storm of power and grabbed her by the shoulders. He shook her, hard, and with a gasp Sierra fell to her knees, spread her hands wide and called her lightning back. The pressure lessened at once and, right on the verge of blacking out, Isidro found he could breathe again.

  Cam hurried back to Isidro’s side. ‘Should I send for Rhia?’

  Isidro shook his head. ‘Just … need to breathe …’ he gasped.

  Sierra crouched beside him, taking off her jacket. She passed it to Cam, who wadded it up and slipped it under Isidro’s head for a pillow.

  ‘Get down to the chamber before you spill again,’ Cam snapped.

  ‘I don’t need to, that wasn’t an attack, I just … oh, by the Black Sun, I just lost my temper … Issey, what’s wrong? Is there anything I can do?’

  ‘You’ve done enough,’ Cam growled, still furious.

  She began to weep large silent tears, and Isidro reached for her with his good hand. She seized it with both of hers. ‘Fires Below, you’re so cold …’

  There came that familiar sense of something shifting inside his head, and Rasten was there. She’s progressing more quickly than I expected. Do you believe me yet? He felt the apprentice gather power and feed it through the connection to replace what Sierra’s outburst had stripped away. It felt … wrong, tainted and sour. Well of course, it came from Blood Magic, but Isidro couldn’t repel it. I probably shouldn’t be doing this, Rasten told him. I’m only delaying the inevitable. But if you die now, Sierra will be heartbroken, and I don’t want her to go through that if I can help it.

  As the power seeped into him Isidro felt his heart beating stronger. Sierra? he called hesitantly.

  She can’t hear you; her power is running too high. As I said, she needs training, and if she doesn’t get it soon she’s going to kill people. Unless you want her to be responsible for the deaths of all her friends and allies, you’d better find a way to send her to me. Rasten pulled away, but the connection remained, feeding him a steady drip of power.

  By the time he was able to sit up again, Cam had apologised to Sierra for speaking so harshly, but she waved his words aside. ‘Don’t apologise, Cam. I deserved every word of it. Issey, I’m so sorry —’

  ‘It was an accident,’ Isidro said.

  ‘That’s not the point!’

  ‘Isidro, does this have anything to do with what happened this morning?’ Cam asked. Sierra turned to him, open-mouthed. Isidro tipped his head back against the cool stone and closed his eyes.

  ‘The bad dream?’ Sierra said. ‘What does that —?’

  ‘I don’t know about any dream,’ Cam said. ‘I’m talking about what happened with Rasten.’

  Speechless, she turned to Isidro.

  ‘Rasten’s playing some game,’ he told her. ‘He’s trying to unsettle us and disrupt your training.’ He half-expected Rasten to respond, but there was nothing there but the steady drip of power. It seemed Rasten had deliberately removed himself, but Isidro couldn’t imagine why.

  ‘He’s hardly said a word to me in ages,’ Sierra said.

  ‘Because he knows it would do no good,’ Isidro said. ‘Of the two of us, I’m the weakest, so he’s targeting me.’ Now that he had strength to move, sprawling across the steps was growing uncomfortable, and he gathered himself to scramble up to the landing.

  The movement pulled his sleeve away from the harness of splints and enchantments. The stones had been glossy and nearly black, but after the storm of power they had turned the colour of filthy snow, and were riddled with cracks.

  Sierra gasped and reached for his wrist. ‘Oh by all the Gods, what have I done?’

  Isidro pulled the sleeve down to cover them. ‘Never mind: it’s mostly healed anyway, and the splints are still whole.’

  Cam was still frowning. ‘Isidro, are you sure there’s nothing to this warning?’

  ‘I’m certain,’ Isidro said firmly. ‘It’s some game of Rasten’s, that’s all.’ It had to be. Anything more was unthinkable.

  Once he was strong enough to stand, the three of them made a careful descent to the cavern, but the jolt of leaping from stone to stone set Isidro’s arm throbbing in a way he hadn’t felt in months. When they reached the bottom, Sierra quelled the pain, and he firmly pushed it from his mind.

  In her tent, Mira had washed her tear-stained face and regained her composure. Sierra went to her at once. ‘Mira, I’m sorry for what I said, but I’ve never regretted anything as much as I regret surrendering to Kell. I thought it was the only thing I could do to save my family, but it was an awful mistake. They died that day, I’m sure of it.’

  Mira’s haughty demeanour softened with her words. ‘Sirri, I can’t imagine how awful it must have been,’ she said, taking her hands. ‘But this isn’t the same at all. This marriage is a wretchedly awful bargain to strike, but if it saves our people from being slaughtered, isn’t it worth the price? You survived two years in Kell’s dungeon, and while you’d never have chosen that fate, if you hadn’t been there to escape when you did, who’s to know if our menfolk would still be alive now? Who would have forced the Akharians to release their slaves and sue for peace? Good things can come out of bad — I’ve learnt that from watching Isidro these last few months. I’m not a warrior or a mage; I�
�m a politician, and I’ve been trained since I was a girl to bend and manipulate even those who despise and distrust me. I may not like it, but the truth is I was made for this, and I’ll be thrice cursed if I’ll shirk my duty when those around me face theirs.’ They shared a tearful embrace, and Mira turned to Cam.

  ‘Cam, my love …’

  With a sigh he scooped her up and buried his face in her red hair. ‘Mira, you’re braver than I am. Let me just say this — if you need to leave, send word and I’ll come for you at once.’

  Mira laughed, the sound muffled against his jacket. ‘Oh, Cam, don’t be a fool. If you show your face within a hundred miles of the court you’ll be killed in a heartbeat. I forbid it! You must stay away so we can be together once all this is over.’

  ‘Here now,’ Cam said, ‘you’re talking like you’re about to ride away, when you simply can’t go just yet. You’re our only advocate with the Wolf Clan — and while Ardamon’s a good man, he can’t fill your shoes.’

  ‘Mira, he’s right,’ Isidro said. ‘You’ll have to find us a replacement, someone we can trust.’

  ‘Oh, I know, and I’ve been thinking on it,’ Mira said. ‘I’d never abandon you to the Wolves without someone to speak for you. I will find someone to take my place.’

  ‘Impossible,’ Cam said.

  Later, Sierra curled up under her furs at Isidro’s side and worried in the darkness. How could she have failed to notice what her power was doing to Isidro? It was hard to focus on the outside world when the magic filled her head with its thrilling current, but the fact that he’d been unable to warn her was terrifying. She’d understand if he pulled away from her after that, out of wariness and self-preservation if nothing else, and yet he had forgiven her at once.

  Sierra laid a hand on his chest, savouring the warmth of his skin and the steady rhythm of his heart. Everything they’d gained was because of him. Issey, I don’t know what I’d do without you.

  In the morning she roused to muffled whispers and sighs, and the rustle of furs. Cam and Mira had put their argument behind them, it seemed, and were making the most of the time they had left.