by Lucinda John
“We can fix this.” She pleaded.
“Honestly, Xandy. I will always love you, and as I told you plenty of times, I will be here for you always. I am proud of you for changing and getting your life back on track, but at this point, I see myself moving forward.”
“I understand.” She sadly replied.
“Go home, and get some rest.”
“You do the same.” She said walking toward the car. She looked back at me one last time before getting in and pulling off.
Walking inside my house, I went over to the picture I found in my father’s hand the night he took his life. I had the picture blown up and placed over my fireplace in remembrance of my parents. As I stood there studying my mother’s beautiful features, I wished she would have listened to my father and got help. Now, it was too late, and she was gone, taking my father with her.
“Fuck!” I yelled wiping the tears from eyes.
* * *
When I made it to my brother’s house for his kick back, I was in awe. My brother at nineteen just purchased his first home, and I was very proud of him. Even though I kept him on a tight leash when it came to his occupation, he continued to prove himself. I knew he was capable of pushing more weight; however, I didn’t want him to limit himself as just a drug dealer. Yes, he was making good money, and the cut I was getting for him was nice, but what he didn’t know was that I was using the portion of the profits he was giving me and investing it in different stocks for him.
The streets didn’t love anyone, and that was why the life span of drug dealers was cut in half. I wanted my brother to know that he could make the money he was making plus more if he walked the straight and narrow path. It may sound hypocritical since I was in the organized crime business as well; however, I wanted more for my brother. I didn’t have a choice since I was forced to raise him at a young age, but he has one, and I want to make sure he’s making the right choice.
Since Sage was having the party at his house, the crowd was small and made up of only people he knew personally. Making my way to the backyard where the smell of barbecue was coming from, I stopped and made small talk with a few people I knew. I spotted Sage in the corner hugged up with that Naria chick, so I decided to chill out by the pool and wait until he was done before walking up on him. I knew Naria was going to give Sage a run for his money, but she was the type of women he needed. I was aware of their age difference, and the way I saw it, better he mess with a grown woman about her business than a little girl looking for her next come up.
My eyes were fixated towards the pool, as I watched Tyreema sit on the edge with a Mike’s Hard Lemonade in her hand. She had a blunt to her lips, which was a turn off to me. When it came to women I found attractive, I didn’t speak to them if they consumed any drugs, weed included. Going through what I went through with my mother and Xandy, I wanted the next woman I dealt with as sober as possible.
“Let me get that blunt; you don’t need that.” I said taking a seat next to her at the pool.
“Hey.” She smiled, looking up at me.” You tryna hit this?” She asked, taking a sip of her beer.
“Nah, I’m tryna finish it off. You too pretty to be smoking.” I honestly said.
“You think I’m pretty?” She blushed.
“I think you’re beautiful, and them sexy lips don’t need to be wrapped around a blunt.” I said taking a toke of her blunt. “This some good shit, too.” I said.
“You such a hypocrite.” She giggled.
“How?” I quizzed.
“You don’t think I should smoke but you inhaling the fuck out of my shit.”
“I’m a man, though.”
“Double standards.”
“Pretty much.” I chuckled.
“I don’t smoke that much anyways. I just been going through some things.” She said.
“How you feeling? I see you healed up well.” I said looking her over.
She was dressed in a gold, high-waist bathing suit with the matching crisscross halter top. She had a long, royal blue and gold sheer cover-up that outlined all of her curves. To say that Tyreema was pretty was an understatement; she was drop dead gorgeous. She had her hair braided back in Ghana braids, allowing her facial features to pop more.
“Physically, I’m feeling much better.” She sadly replied.
“Emotionally?”
“I’m still healing.”
“I don’t want to overstep my boundaries, but how is your husband treating you?”
“My fiancé… is… you know.” She shrugged.
“No, I don’t know. If I had a woman as beautiful as yourself pregnant with my child, there is no way you would still be my fiancé. You’d be my wife.” I honestly replied.
“Is that so?”
“Yes.”
“Does your girlfriend know you’re out here talking to me like this?” She asked.
“What girlfriend?”
“The girl I saw you rushing out of your brother’s party with.” She replied.
“Oh, Xandy? Nah, she’s not my girlfriend. Just an ex who had one too many drinks and needed a ride home.” I said.
“So you mean to tell me you’re single?”
“Like a dollar bill.”
“Why is someone as handsome and caring like yourself single?” She asked, causing me to smile.
“Maybe because all of the good women are engaged to the wrong guys.” I replied, looking deep into her eyes.
“I love your dimples.” She blushed.
“I love your spirit.”
For a few minutes, we just sat there in silence both gazing at the beautiful water that filled Sage’s pool. For some reason, I wanted to grab Tyreema and run away from our problems, but it was all easier said than done. It was something about her aura that had me drawn to and wanting to know more about her.
“What’s on your mind?” She asked breaking the silence.
“You.”
“Me?”
“Yes.” I replied.
“What about me?”
“How a person so beautiful could go through something so ugly but still remain poised.”
“I guess it’s in my blood.” She giggled.
“I know you have a fiancé, and I use that term loosely, but that don’t stop me from wanting to get to know you.”
“Get to know me?” She reluctantly asked.
“Not sexually or even romantically; just as friends.” I offered.
“Friends? You believe a man and a woman can only be friends?”
“Yes they can; we can be whatever you want us to be.” I boldly said.
I was never this forward when it came to women, but Tyreema had me wanting to break all the rules. I was stepping on her man’s toes, and at that point, I didn’t give a fuck. As far as I was concerned, she deserved a king, and he was just a joker.
“I’m in a relationship.” She flashed her ring.
“I understand that, and I’m willing to respect it.”
“I don’t know.”
“Take my number, and you decide if you want to use it.” I offered.
“Mmm.”
“Hand me your phone.” I replied holding my hand out.
I punched in my number and saved it under Sasha.
“Sasha.” She giggled.
“Yes, I ain’t trying to cause any problems.”
“Cool.” She replied standing up.
Got damn!
I screamed in my head as I got a full view of her voluptuous body. When she dropped her cover-up, I was sure I was sitting there looking like a thirsty dog. She smiled down at me then dived into the water causing some to splash on me. She came up and winked at me before she went back to swimming. I looked over at her phone and noticed the wallpaper of her, her handsome son, and the buster who must have been her fiancé. I didn’t know much about him, but I did know that she was suffering emotionally at the hands of this clown. I wasn’t the one to play Captain Sa
ve-a-Hoe, but Tyreema seems to be much more than that.
Chapter 13
Tyreema
Jerecho was still out of town, Naria was with one of her dips of the week, and Tyreek bailed on me to hang out with Chelly at Chuck E. Cheese’s leaving me home alone. Since there wasn’t much for me to do, I decided to log into Facebook and study a few eBook covers made by a graphic designer I followed. The way the images were well-blended together creating a vivid visual story had me drawn. After reaching out to a few helpful graphic designers and watching a few YouTube tutorials, I was able to basically teach myself the basic concepts.
I pulled an off guard picture of myself from my camera roll and uploaded it to Photoshop. Once I was done editing it, I placed it on my book cover template and went to work. I used a few book covers I downloaded as a study guide as I worked on my very own. I was focused as I used iPhotos to create the perfect backdrop and accessories that would make my cover grab the attention of the author’s audience.
Four long hours later of deleting and starting over I was finally done with my first book cover. I was excited and impressed all at once as I stared at the masterpiece I created. The cover looked so emotional that it could belong to a story of a girl going through the shit similar to myself. I thought about uploading my cover, but then self-doubt changed my mind.
Closing my laptop, I laid across my bed and thought of myself. I used to be so vibrant filled with joy and goals, but somewhere along the line, I lost it all. It was as if I was existing instead of living, slowly bringing myself towards depression.
I was doing the very thing Chelly warned me not to do and that was loving a man more than I loved myself. Jerecho didn’t have any real goals, forcing me to not want to have any for myself. He wasn’t the type to encourage me to work towards my dreams, which was why I couldn’t even upload the book cover I worked so hard to create. I was filled with so much talent, but because my fiancé would rather me sit home and cater to his every need, they went unnoticed.
As I fought with my emotions, my mind wandered off to Saire. For some odd reason, he was like a breath of fresh air. Since the day I met him in the hospital, I’d often daydreamed about him being my night and shining armor, rescuing me from the big bad wolf. I couldn’t explain why I was feeling this way towards a stranger, but it felt right talking to him.
Clicking the Sasha contact on my phone, I decided to call him, but then chickened out, and I immediately, hang it up. I didn’t know what I would say to him, because before him, I had never given my number to any other males. I was one hundred percent committed to Jerecho and had been for the last seven years.
I was on my Kindle app scrolling through more book covers when Sasha called. At first, I was startled and hit the declined button off of reflex. I laid there staring at the missed call contemplated if I wanted to call him back or not until an incoming call came through my phone again.
“Hello?” I answered.
“I knew it was you.” He chuckled in the phone.
His deep voice echoing through the phone gave me chills. He sounded as if he were sleeping or just waking up. I wanted to just lay there and listen to him talk to me for hours while I wore this goofy grin that was plastered on my face.
“You there?” He asked.
“Yes, were you sleeping?”
“Nah, just taking a power nap. Why did you call then hang up?” He asked.
“I guess I chickened out.”
“I see.”
“How did you know it was me?” I asked.
“That cute little baby voice you got. You sound like a kid.”
“I do not.” I giggled.
“You do. So what’s good? Your man ain’t around, is he?”
“No, he’s out of town on business.” I replied.
“How long will he be gone?”
“He comes back in three more days.” I replied.
“Meet me somewhere.” He said.
“I don’t know.” I replied, not wanting to risk any of Jerecho’s boys seeing me out with him.
“If you’re worried about your dude peoples seeing us, it’s cool. I got a few ducked off spaces.” He said reading my mind.
“Ummm. I don’t…”
“I’mma text you the location; it’s up to you.” He said hanging up the phone.
A few minutes later, my phone buzzed with a text of an address. I sat back contemplating my next move until I figured, what the heck. Jumping off my bed, I jumped in the shower and got dressed.
One hour later, I was pulling into the parking lot of a park. I’d drove by this wooded area numerous of times, and not once did I think this was a park. The only car that was parked in the parking lot was a sexy, all-black Hummer, so I decided to park next to it.
When I got out, I followed the path to the lake as I was instructed to. The inside of the park was discreet and quiet, with a laid back vibe. No one was really here except Saire, who was sitting close to the lake with his eyes buried in his phone.
“You made it.” He said, as I walked up on him.
“I didn’t want to have you looking crazy sitting here alone.” I replied.
“Glad to know you care.” He chuckled, pointing down to the seat next to him.
“This is beautiful.” I said.
“I come out here a lot.” He replied.
“You seem like you got a lot on your mind.” I said, looking over at his handsome face that was filled with worry lines.
“I do.” He said.
“You want to talk about it?” I asked.
At that moment, I wanted to be there for him just like he was for me.
“Can I trust you?”
“I can keep a secret if that’s what you mean.”
“I’m feeling you; your vibe. I like being around you.” He said, catching me off guard.
“Mmm… Really?” I cleared my throat.
“Yeah.”
“I like being around you, too.” I admitted.
“Talk to me about your fiancé.”
“What do you want to know?”
“Anything you’re willing to tell.” He answered.
“Only if you tell me about your ex.” I countered.
“Deal.” He chuckled.
For three hours, we sat by the lake and talked about Jerecho and Xandy. From what he told me about his ex, it had me respecting him as a man even more. He was so kind, gentle, and caring with a right amount of hood added. The way we were able to jump from topic and topic, engaging in stimulating conversations was mind-blowing. I couldn’t remember the last time I sat down with Jerecho and just talked about everything.
“This cover is dope.” He said, looking over at the picture of the book cover I designed.
“Thanks. Graphic designing is my passion.”
“Why don’t you pursue a career in it?” He asked.
My fiancé doesn’t think it’s wise.”
“So you mean to tell me that the man that you lay down with every night is against you following your dreams?” He asked, with a look of confusion on his face.
“Yeah.” I shrugged.
“I know that’s your dude, but you have to stop letting that man have complete control of your life. There is nowhere in life’s handbook that says you must give up on your dreams, because your mate doesn’t agree with them. If anything, he should have fronted you the money to get started. Women these days lack ambition, so when you find one that has some, as a man, you have to push her to her fullest potential.” He lectured.
“I wish he would understand that.” I sighed.
“I wish you could understand that you’re too good for him.” He said, catching me by surprise.
“Naria tells me that all the time.”
“Naria is a wise woman. A man should complement his woman, not tear her down. Based off what you’re telling me, and what I’ve observed, he ain’t a man yet.”
“I know.” I admitted.
&nbs
p; “You need a real man in your life.” He said, causing chills to run up and down my spine.
“It’s getting late, and I have to get going. My son should be coming home soon.” I said getting up.
“It’s cool, Ma. Hit me up and let me know you got home safely.” He replied.
The whole drive home, my conversation with Saire replayed in my head like a broken tape recorder. I could see the passion in his eyes when he spoke to me, and that shit was scary. I never had a manhandle me the way Saire did. He had me feeling as if the world was mine and I was able to conquer anything I put my mind to. A stranger that I just met was giving me more support than the man who claimed he was ready for me to become his wife.
Chapter 14
Jordynn
“Dick was good as always.” I purred.
“Remember, don’t bring your ass home until Sunday.” Jerecho snapped, as he pulled up his pants.
He lied and told Tyreema that he was flying out of town when, in reality, we both rented cars and came back home to chill with our son Jerry. It wasn’t often that we were able to hang out and spend family time together, but when we did, I cherished every moment of it. I hated how his relationship with Tyreema stood in the way of us having a real family, and I was patiently waiting for everything to come to light.
“You heard me?” Jerecho asked.
“Yes, Daddy.” I replied.
“Bring your ass home early if you want to, and I’ll fuck you up.” He warned.
“I hear you, dang!” I snapped rolling my eyes.
I watched as Jerecho walked around my room gathering his clothes and placing them in his duffle bag. He double checked my closet and made sure all of his things were packed before walking towards the bathroom to take a shower. His phone started to ring and a picture of Tyreema and Tyreek smiling popped up on his screen. I wanted to pick up the phone and blast his ass, but thinking of the consequences had me reconsidering. To piss her off, I did forward her to the voicemail.
“Iight, I’m out of here.” Jerecho said, walking into the room fully dressed.
“I’ll see you when I come home, I guess.” I rolled my eyes.