Out Of This World

by Annette Mori

  I kept my voice low so Greg wouldn’t be able to overhear. “Celeste is a little better, but she needs a lot more time in the sun, so we’re going to have to buy a little time. She has the ability to do some minor mind control. I think it works like hypnosis, but maybe a little stronger. We need to bring him to her because she doesn’t have a whole lot of excess energy right now.”

  “Well, that could be a bit of a challenge. In case you haven’t noticed he’s a big guy, and I don’t think he’s going to just let us move him without some resistance.”

  “Can’t you just knock him out or something, like you did before?”

  Sydney scowled at me. “What do you think I am, Rambo or something? I didn’t necessarily plan on knocking him out before, it just happened. I got lucky and probably hit him in just the right spot.”

  “Can’t you activate one of those pressure points? There are at least three that I know of—pushing against the windpipe, pressure to the vagus nerve, and pinching someone’s carotid artery.”

  “Mabs, this isn’t Hollywood, you know, and I’m not Jackie Chan. I don’t think that stuff really works in real life, and I don’t want to do something that would permanently harm him.”

  “The guy shot me and you’re worried about hurting him,” I shouted.

  I heard Greg grunt so he must have heard that last comment. Oh well, so much for not alerting him.

  “Good point, but I’m not an assassin you know.”

  “Listen, Sydney, you know I read a lot right?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Well trust me, I have a lot of useless information floating around in my brain and there really are these pressure points that I’m sure would work. Pick one and I’ll tell you exactly where it is and what to do based on what I read.”

  “Why in the world would you read about something like that, and how can you possibly remember everything you read?”

  I shrugged my shoulders, “Photographic memory. It comes in handy sometimes. I get bored and it’s amazing the stuff you can learn when you read unconventional material. I suggest the vagus nerve because it’s probably the most vulnerable pressure point. It connects the brain and the heart and a quick blow causes unconsciousness really fast. It’s also not one little spot, but rather a long nerve that runs down the neck starting about one inch below a person’s ear. I think you either have to put pressure on the nerve with your palm or forearm and bounce a few times, or a quick karate chop should do the trick. Don’t hit him too hard though or you can kill him. If his eyes roll up right after you hit him, then I’m pretty sure you did it right. Even if he comes to after a few seconds, he’ll be lightheaded and won’t have the necessary motor skills to fight. Not that I’m sadistic or anything, but he’ll also feel pretty shitty and I have to admit that I won’t feel bad about that. I’d watch out for vomit though, cause I read that it’s a pretty common side effect.”

  “Remind me never to piss you off.” She grinned at me.

  I blushed. “I could never get mad at you.”

  “Okay, I guess I better give this a try then. Maybe you can hold his head or something so I don’t miss. I suppose a chop to both sides of his neck would increase my chances of getting it right the first time.”

  I nodded and stood up straight ready to help her out. I didn’t even recognize this person I was turning into. If I really took the time to think about it, I probably would have retreated to my cozy little home and never come out. I was about to hold some guy’s head while my friend Sydney karate chopped him. Real life was stranger than fiction, you can’t make this stuff up. It was beyond absurd.

  Sydney brushed by me and I felt my breath hitch as her body brushed against mine. I couldn’t help myself, she still seems to affect me.

  She looked down at me and our eyes met. I couldn’t tell if she noticed my reaction or not, but when her pupils dilated, it seemed to convey something I didn’t think I’d ever seen before. Was it possible that Sydney had a similar reaction? I shook my head at what a ridiculous notion that was.

  I started to laugh when I saw Greg squirming around on the bedroom floor, like the snake he was, trying to find a way free. He snarled at us when we entered the room.

  “Okay Mabs, grab his head for me,” Sydney directed.

  I was tempted to yank his head up using his hair, but he didn’t have enough hair to hang onto. He was putting up a good struggle as I got behind him and tried to hold his head still. “I’d rather not hurt you, even though you did shoot me, you poser, but if you keep struggling I’ll suggest a less humane way to deal with you.” I boxed his ears as a warning.

  That seemed to stop his struggles and gave Sydney enough time to execute a perfect blow to each side of his head in the exact spot I’d described. I was so proud of her. She was a quick learner that’s for sure.

  He slumped forward immediately.

  “I’ll take his head if you get his feet,” I pronounced.

  “Okay. Let’s hurry and get him outside before he wakes up,” she agreed.

  We wasted no time in transporting him to the back yard. God, he was heavy. I noted that he could do with a few less desserts.

  †

  We unceremoniously dumped Greg on the ground next to the hammock. He hadn’t woken up yet and I took several paces back in case he started tossing his cookies all over my new shoes. I knew it was shallow of me to be thinking about my shoes, but in my defense, they were really expensive Mephisto’s. Sydney took a page from my book and took several steps back herself.

  Celeste looked even better than when I’d left her ten minutes earlier. She was starting to get a little color back in her face. I suspected after she performed her little mind manipulation, she might revert to her ghostlike appearance, but at least more time in the sun seemed to make a big difference.

  “You temporarily interrupted his energy flow,” Celeste stated.

  “Uh yeah, he wasn’t exactly in a cooperating kind of mood.”

  “We will need to wait until he is more alert and has recovered fully before I attempt mind control,” Celeste explained.

  “Will you be able to tell when he’s ready?” Sydney asked.

  “Yes, I will be able to determine the appropriate time frame,” Celeste answered.

  Sydney walked over to her back patio, grabbed two folding chairs, and brought them closer to the hammock. “Here, we might as well relax until sleeping beauty gets his energy groove back. I’d offer you a beer or some hard lemonade, but I think we should avoid drinking anything that might impair our reasoning until we can figure out how to handle this adventure we’ve all decided to take.”

  “Would I like this beer or hard lemonade?” Celeste asked.

  “Probably,” I giggled. “But I think that experience ought to wait for a little while.”

  “Ahhhh,” Greg groaned, opened his eyes and promptly vomited in the grass. “What the fuck did you do to me?”

  “Ew, I should get some of Gizmo’s kitty litter because that,” Sydney pointed to the fresh pool of vomit, “is definitely gonna stink.”

  “We should let him settle for a bit before we get Celeste to do her thing.”

  Greg got a wide-eyed look, and for the first time, I thought I saw fear in his eyes.

  “Wha…what is she going to do to me?” he stuttered.

  “Relax. It’s not like she’s gonna eat your face off or anything. Not that you don’t deserve it, you douche bag,” Sydney answered.

  I looked down at Greg and noticed the burn mark on his clothes, probably from when Celeste blasted him with her energy burst. I hadn’t spotted that before. No wonder he was nervous. I pointed at the scorch mark.

  “Oh,” Sydney muttered.

  Greg looked down at his shirt and I swear I thought he was going to cry. Men can be such babies. I smirked at him. Served him right for shooting me. I wasn’t above letting him sweat a tiny bit. What had come over me? All of a sudden I had this little evil streak running through me.

  Sydney glanced at me and I
thought that maybe she could read my mind or something because she laughed and blurted out, “Well, I don’t think she’s gonna have to eat your face, but I’m not sure exactly what she might have planned for you. She has become rather fond of Mabs here and you did shoot her. I suppose another burn mark is not out of the realm of possibility.”

  Celeste gracefully repositioned herself on the hammock so that she was sitting rather than lying down and cocked her head to the side. “You mentioned something called a prank, Bella. Is this what you are doing now?”

  “Not really,” I hedged, “and I suppose I should stop being mean. This is what you might call a cruel joke, letting Greg believe that you are planning to hurt him in some way.” I looked down. I felt ashamed of myself. All the times the bullies joked around at my expense should have taught me to be a bit more sensitive. Greg was, after all, another human being.

  I glanced at Greg. “Sorry. Fortunately for you, Celeste is a gentle and pure soul and doesn’t have it in her to intentionally hurt you. Violence is your thing, not ours.”

  “Can you please direct me in what specifically you would like to plant in his mind?” Celeste asked.

  “Well we briefly talked about leading Greg to genuinely believe that he couldn’t find you here in Cle Elum, but was able to determine that you were headed to Alaska. It’s a state that’s pretty far away from here up North. You’re going to have to really make him trust something different from what he experienced because he’ll be talking to his supervisor and he’ll need to sound believable. Maybe you can throw in some facts, like he tracked you here after he got credible information from Hollie that led him to the cabin, but he lost you, and then had to track down more information to determine where you were headed. You can suggest that Sydney gave him the new information.”

  I glanced over at Sydney who frowned at this suggestion. “Sorry, Sydney, but I don’t think it’s believable that I would give him information if he’s already made a report to his boss.”

  “Yeah, you’re probably right about that. I was initially sympathetic to his story,” Sydney acknowledged.

  I thought of something. “Can you get him to be calm while we search his pockets for a cell phone to hold up to his ear? In case this doesn’t work too well, we need to keep him restrained.”

  Celeste stood up and walked over to where Greg was half sitting, half slouched on the ground. She touched his arm and I saw the purple light leak out again. The lines on his face showing his stress and discomfort immediately evened out. He almost looked like he was in a drug-induced state.

  Sydney, bless her heart, went searching in his pockets for his cell phone. Once she located it, she held it in the air for us to see.

  Celeste continued her contact with Greg and his eyes began to flutter and twitch. I wondered if she was giving him instructions telepathically.

  She nodded at me as if answering my question.

  “You may put the phone to his ear after you select whatever button will retrieve the last call made,” Celeste directed.

  “Will you be able to hear who is on the other end, so you can direct the conversation?” I asked.

  “I am able to decipher what he is hearing as I probe his brain while I simultaneously suggest the correct response,” Celeste answered.

  Sydney hit the button on the iPhone, swiped the screen, and frowned. “Damn, it requires a code.”

  Celeste seemed to narrow her gaze at Greg as he blurted out, “Four, one, two, six.”

  Sydney swiped the screen again and punched in those numbers. “Voila and presto. Time to do your thing, Celeste.” She held the phone up to his ear after punching a few buttons on the phone.

  Celeste tilted her head and I hurried to clarify what ‘do your thing’ meant. “She means do the mind control thing and give him the right instructions.”

  Sydney shrugged. “Sorry.”

  I put my finger to my lips to gesture that we should all be quiet while Greg talked with his boss.

  “No, I don’t have her yet… Yeah, she was here in Cle Elum until a few hours ago… No, it was credible information… Don’t worry, I got another lead… Alaska… Yeah, you heard right, for some reason she’s headed to Alaska… the other dyke gave me that information… No, I’m sure she was telling me the truth. It was confirmed by another source… Don’t worry, I’m on it. They only have a two or three hour head start… No, you don’t need to send anyone else, I can handle it… Give me two days and I’ll have her secured for pick up… No, we don’t want to cause anyone to ask too many questions and if you send up more people, it will be overly suspicious. With her odd behavior, the cover story is working… Just let me do my job. I’ll be in touch.”

  “You may stop the communication device now,” Celeste informed.

  Sydney punched the end button and I relaxed a bit. The mind control appeared to work. Celeste swayed a bit and I jumped to her side to lead her back to the hammock. She had that pasty white complexion again and I worried that all the gains she’d made in the sun were once again depleted.

  Greg seemed to be in a kind of trance like state and I hoped he would stay that way until we had a bona fide plan for keeping Celeste safe.

  “Why don’t you rest for a little while longer while Sydney and I figure out what to do with Greg.”

  It was still relatively early in the day, with plenty of sunshine left for Celeste to be able to recharge. I worried that every time she appeared to perk up a bit, we had another task for her that depleted her energies. I didn’t think Earth’s sun was as effective as the three suns on her planet and we were definitely taxing her body.

  I glanced back at Greg while Sydney and I started walking back into the cabin. I wanted to make sure he was still out of it and wouldn’t be causing us any problems. Sydney followed my eyes and nodded, appearing to agree with my assessment that we could leave him on the grass. I wasn’t too keen on trying to drag him back into the cabin with us.

  †

  My stomach growled loudly and I realized that I hadn’t eaten since the night before with all the drama of the morning. I also hadn’t taken a shower, brushed my teeth, or washed my hair yet. Ew, gross. I probably looked a lot like Bozo the Clown with my hair sticking out every which way.

  Sydney grinned at me. “I hear your tummy talking. You haven’t eaten anything today, have you?”

  I shook my head. “No, been kind of busy, you know. Celeste hasn’t either, but I think rest in the sun might be more important than food right now.” I wondered how I would slip away for some personal grooming without appearing rude. I quickly smoothed my hair down in an attempt to look somewhat presentable in front of Sydney.

  “Well, I’m not a fabulous cook like you, but I think I can handle a couple of turkey sandwiches with a side of Tim’s Cascade chips.”

  “Um, Sydney, do you mind if I at least use your bathroom to brush my teeth?” I ran my tongue across my pearly whites. “They feel pretty grungy right now. I hate to leave all the work for you, but can you make one for Celeste and we can give it to her when she’s done resting?”

  “Of course.” She waved her hand at me like it was no big deal.

  While Sydney started making the sandwiches, I ran to the bathroom and quickly brushed my teeth. I didn’t have time to do a thorough job like I normally would. Usually, I made sure I brushed for at least two minutes because that’s what my dental hygienist always recommended. I didn’t want to impose on Sydney’s hospitality too much, so I just settled for having minty fresh breath after a cursory brush. I took one look at myself in the mirror and cringed. I found a brush in one of the drawers and tried to tame my bedhead. I didn’t even bother to change my blood-soaked shirt because I didn’t want to leave Sydney all alone in the kitchen.

  I walked back into the kitchen and watched Sydney lay out the lunchmeat, mayonnaise, mustard, and tomato on the counter.

  “Anything I can do to help?” I asked.

  She shook her head and grabbed a loaf of whole wheat bread from her
small pantry. She turned around and gave me a strange look like she had a question on the tip of her tongue, but didn’t quite know how to ask.

  “Go ahead, I know you’re just dying to ask me something.” I grabbed a knife and started to slice the tomato.

  “I know it’s not really my business, but do you see any kind of future with Celeste? I mean, she’s not from our world and eventually she’ll leave.”

  I know Sydney didn’t point this out to me to be cruel, it was a fact I hadn’t exactly absorbed. I frowned and felt like the elevator just dropped from a high rise. The knot in the pit of my stomach was probably as big as my fist. I knew at that moment that when Celeste left she would leave a huge hole in my heart. All the joy I’d been feeling over the last couple of days had an expiration date. I slumped on the stool in the kitchen. The balloon of happiness just whooshed right out.

  “I haven’t exactly been thinking too much about that. I was trying to live in the moment I guess. I’ll take whatever time I can get. It’s not like I’ll ever have an opportunity for this kind of happiness again in my lifetime.”

  “What do you mean, you won’t have an opportunity for this kind of happiness again?”

  “Oh, you know, someone who thinks I’m beautiful and wants to, uh, you know…”

  Sydney’s face scrunched up. “Are you crazy or something? Women would have been lining up in droves if they’d only known that you played for our team.”

  I waved her away. “Thanks, Sydney. You are a true friend and I appreciate what you’re trying to do, but I know what I am and what I’m not.”

  “You really don’t know, do you? God, Mabs, I’ve had the biggest crush on you since the first day I ever laid eyes on you. Why in the world do you think I got in all those fights? Hollie’s always known that. That’s the biggest reason why she hates you so much. She never lets me forget it either. Now that she knows you’re a lesbian she’s doubly dangerous. Before, she would just remind me how straight you were, but I guess I always sensed that you were gay and just not ready to come out to the world yet. I never knew how much she actually picked on you or I would have put a stop to it. She’s convinced that you are the reason we broke up this time. I’ll admit it was a factor, but this has been coming for a very long time.”