The Shocking Secret of a Guest at the Wedding (Millworth Manor)

by Victoria Alexander

  Teddy sighed in surrender. “I don’t know. I only know if I don’t try to succeed on my own, I’ll never know if I could. To thine own self be true and all.” She shook her head. “I don’t want to spend my life wondering what if. It’s not fair to me and it wouldn’t be fair to him.”

  “I suppose you have to do what you feel you must.” Dee studied her for a long moment. “I only hope, my dear friend, you won’t find the price for the life you’re choosing to be too high. Or too lonely.”

  “Goodness, Dee, this is an altogether too serious discussion to be having at the moment.” Teddy forced a light note to her voice. “After all, Christmas is nearly upon us and there are all sorts of far more delightful topics to be considering.”

  “Sugarplums and stuffed stockings and the like, you mean?”

  “Exactly.” Teddy nodded, took her friend’s arm, and started back for the stairway. “Now then, tell me what you have in mind for Sam . . .”

  It was far easier to distract Dee from the topic of Teddy’s future than it was to keep her mind off it herself because as much as she might try to deny it, Teddy was afraid she had indeed fallen in love with Jack.

  And didn’t that just complicate everything?

  “I like her, Jack.” Father paced the width of the library. “I didn’t expect that.”

  “Why not?” Jack sat on the library sofa and watched his father with a certain amount of amusement. He would have bet nothing could put his father in such a state. But apparently his mother could. “You liked her once.”

  “Well yes but that was different.” Father waved off the comment. “We were both young, swept away by the impetuousness of first love. We hadn’t known each other for long. It was all very romantic and passionate and intense. I’ve always credited the rashness of our marriage to impulse even though I’ve never been an especially impulsive man. We were in love and promised to love each other forever. Now, I can’t help but wonder . . . He paused and met his son’s gaze. “Did we keep that promise?”

  “Oh.” Jack stared at his father. “I don’t know what to say.”

  “Neither do I.” His father ran his hand through his hair. “When I learned about you and set off for New York I was furious with her. And well, frankly, I was hurt. Deeply hurt. Not merely by her deception but by her lack of faith in me. Of trust if you will. I thought I had put her behind me years ago but the pain I felt when I learned what she had kept from me all those years was as sharp as it was the day she left me.”

  “I see,” Jack said slowly.

  “It makes you wonder, doesn’t it? Why she never sought a divorce. Why I never married again. Or rather, why I never again found someone I wished to marry.” He resumed pacing. “We’ve spent a great deal of time together since she arrived at Millworth. She’s far more interesting now than she was when we first met but then I suppose so am I. And quite passionate, too, in her opinions about any number of things.” He shook his head. “There’s a great deal we disagree about but . . .” He stopped and looked at his son. “Oddly enough, I enjoy arguing with her. It’s rather a lot of fun. I find it most invigorating as, I suspect, does she.”

  “As neither of you has done the other in, you might be right.”

  “I know I said the whole idea of soul mates was absurd—”

  “Balderdash.” Jack nodded. “You called it balderdash.”

  “I’m beginning to think I might have been wrong.” His brow furrowed. “Don’t misunderstand me, I haven’t spent the last three decades thinking about her, longing for her, or missing her although now, upon reflection, I wonder if she was ever far from my mind. Oh, not consciously of course but there nonetheless.”

  Jack studied the older man for a moment. “What are you trying to say?”

  “I don’t know.” The colonel stared in astonishment. “I have no idea. I’m completely confused. We have gone our separate ways, lived our separate lives and it’s absurd to think we can find what we once had. We’re completely different people after all. I’m not sure we can go back. Or that we want to, either of us. Still . . .”

  “Still?”

  “One does wonder . . .”

  “Yes?”

  “No, we can’t go back. I’m certain of that. But perhaps . . .”

  Even though his father was addressing Jack, it was obvious he was trying to work out the answer in his own head. “Perhaps what?”

  “Perhaps we can go forward from here. Start over, that sort of thing.” He lowered his voice in a confidential manner. “I don’t mind telling you I still find your mother a most attractive woman. Most attractive.”

  “That’s nice,” Jack said weakly. While it was gratifying that his mother still held a certain appeal for his father, it was more than he really wanted to know.

  “I’ve always believed when you find what you want in life, your heart’s desire I suppose, you should let nothing stand in your way.” Father shook his head. “Admittedly I did not follow that precept when I first met your mother . . .”

  “But you were much younger then and not nearly as wise.”

  “I’m not sure I’m wise now but I am smart enough to know second chances are rare in this life. One would be a fool to ignore an opportunity when it comes along.”

  “It sounds to me as if you have made up your mind.”

  “It does, doesn’t it?” Father thought for a moment. “I suppose I have. I’m certainly not ready to let her go again.” He glanced at his son. “I think you should forgive her, you know.”

  “Why?”

  “Because as wrong as she was, I believe her actions were prompted by fear and love.”

  “Even so—”

  “Because she’s your mother, Jack,” Father said firmly. “And because it’s Christmas. This is the one time of year when one tends to realize what is truly important in life. Friends, family, love.”

  “Have you forgiven her?”

  “One makes mistakes in this life one can never make up for. I do think your mother regrets her actions.” He shook his head. “Although I can’t say she wouldn’t do the same thing again given the same circumstances. Nor can I say I wouldn’t make the same mistakes again. But she is my wife and I wouldn’t at all mind taking a crack at being a husband.” His brows drew together. “Do you think I’m too old for that?”

  Jack laughed. “I wouldn’t think so.”

  “What about you and Theodosia?” He studied his son closely. “Wasn’t your original plan to end this engagement before the New Year?”

  “That’s still the plan but . . .”

  His father chose his words with care. “But you’d like to make it real?”

  Jack nodded.

  “You’re in love with her, aren’t you?”

  “I’m afraid so.” Even as he said the words, he realized they were true.

  “And does she share your feelings?”

  “I think so but . . .” Jack blew a long breath. “I’m not sure she would admit it. She has set a course for herself that does not include marriage and unfortunately does not include me.”

  “I see.” Father thought for a moment. “Have you told her how you feel?”

  “Not yet.”

  “Perhaps that would be the place to start.”

  “Perhaps.” Jack arched a brow. “And have you told Mother how you feel?”

  His father winced. “I suppose this is a case of do what I say not what I do, isn’t it?”

  “So it would appear.” Jack chuckled.

  “Very well, then I shall make you a bargain.” Father squared his shoulders. “I shall tell your mother no later than January first exactly how I feel and you shall do the same with Theodosia.”

  “I can agree to that.” Jack paused. “And if this doesn’t end as we wish, what then?”

  “You mean if they don’t throw themselves into our arms and vow their undying love?”

  “Something like that.”

  Father thought for a long moment. “The benefit of growing older is that o
ne has hopefully learned a lesson or two along the way. I failed to fight for your mother once.” He shook his head. “I will not make the same mistake again. Even if the only one I have to fight is the lady herself.”

  Jack grinned. “That should be interesting.”

  “I don’t intend to lose.” Father eyed him firmly. “And neither should you.”

  “Theodosia has plans for her life that don’t include me.”

  “Change them.” Father nodded. “Love is a powerful force, Jack. You have that on your side.”

  “It might not be enough.”

  “I have faith in you, my boy.” Father studied him for a moment. “As I said, when you find your heart’s desire, you should let nothing stand in your way.”

  “Even the lady herself?”

  Father grinned. “Especially the lady herself.”

  Jack laughed. His father was right, of course. But Theodosia was a stubborn woman. While he was fairly certain her feelings for him matched his for her, there was always the possibility he was wrong. Just because he had fallen in love for the first time in his life didn’t mean she had. Her affection for him might go no further than friendship.

  No, Jack had always been able to judge the nature of a man. He was not wrong about this. The woman loved him whether she realized it or not.

  Now, he just had to convince her.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  “. . . and then, of course, the solicitor, being a solicitor,” Lionel continued, “could do little more but arrive at the obvious and yet completely far-fetched . . .”

  Teddy surveyed the faces gathered around the table for Christmas Eve dinner, all focused at the moment on Beryl’s husband regaling them with a humorous legal tale of a man discovered to have more than one wife.

  “. . . needless to say, wife number two was not at all amused by the . . .”

  As entertaining as Lionel’s story was, Teddy’s mind wandered. In all the years she’d known this family, she never would have imagined one day they would all share a convivial Christmas Eve together. Of course, there had been a few trying moments in the last few days.

  In spite of Dee’s observation as to the unexpected lack of friction at the manor, all was not perfect among the older ladies of the party. The first night of their arrival, there were tentative undercurrents among the three mothers. Silly of course. They were all of a comparable age and background and should have gone on quite well together. But as much as her mother and Lady Briston knew many of the same people and had similar interests there were still years of vague distrust to overcome. And while Mrs. Channing was cordial enough to Teddy, she had the distinct feeling that she was being evaluated and found wanting. It was obvious Jack’s mother preferred the annoyingly delightful Miss Merryweather as a more appropriate match for her son. Miss Merryweather—who had insisted Teddy call her by her given name—was as charming and lovely as everyone had said. Mrs. Channing’s preference for the young woman did not sit well with either Teddy’s mother or Lady Briston, not merely because Lady Briston was fond of Teddy but because Mrs. Channing’s preferences seemed something of a slap against the entire British Empire.

  Jack found it all most amusing. During the first night of their stay, while they were gathered to sing Christmas carols in the parlor, he’d nudged Teddy with his elbow when a politely phrased, but no less deadly, barb was thrown between the three ladies. One would have thought they were natural enemies confined together against their will. The other men seemed to find it amusing as well especially given that it was all Teddy, Dee, and Camille could do to keep them singing along. It was very nearly impossible to snipe at one another while singing one of the glorious carols each and every lady knew and loved.

  It might indeed have been the spirit of Christmas, or possibly each mother had decided, in the interest of the season, to make a concerted effort to get along with one another, but by the second day, overly polite comments had eased into genuine conversation. The ladies took part in an afternoon of skating on the frozen Millworth pond, admittedly with a fair amount of mutual trepidation. They put aside any reluctance to cooperate and worked together in finishing the decoration of the manor. And in an odd twist of fate that had the other members of the household holding their breaths, all three mothers ended up on the same team for an evening of games in the parlor. By the time they had soundly beaten the others at charades and tableaux and lookabout, their individual competitive natures had forged some sort of bond or at least an alliance. Now, one would have thought they’d been friends forever. Perhaps it was the inevitable result of compromise for the sake of their offspring. Or perhaps the ladies had at last recognized in each other kindred spirits. Or possibly it was indeed a true miracle of the season.

  By the time Christmas Eve was upon them Teddy had decided to simply enjoy the revelry and enjoy Jack’s company as well. It wasn’t much of a plan as plans went but it was all she had. She refused to consider the question of whether or not she was in love with him, although it did seem that her heart leapt whenever he was in the room, and her pulse quickened when he so much as brushed her hand, and the thought of living her life without him lay like a heavy weight in the pit of her stomach.

  “. . . and then of course wife number four—”

  “I thought you said there were only three?” Surprise rang in Camille’s voice.

  “Only in the beginning.” Lionel chuckled. “Our Mr. Benson was a bit of a traveling man, you see—”

  Lucy gasped. “And did he have a wife in every port?”

  “Very nearly.” Lionel chuckled. “And when wife number four was discovered, well, it led to . . .”

  Dinner was a festive affair with spirited debate, much mirth, and the kind of good-natured teasing that can only occur when people care for one another. Teddy marveled that this family that had spent years celebrating Christmas apart now seemed completely comfortable in each other’s presence. In the midst of laughter over a recollection of Christmas past when Lady Briston had typically filled the house with acquaintances and even strangers who had nowhere else to go for Christmas, Jack’s amused gaze met hers and for a moment . . . for a moment it was hard to remember that they weren’t really engaged. They weren’t planning to spend the rest of their lives together. And they weren’t in love. A twinge of what might have been regret or remorse or sorrow stabbed Teddy and she tried to ignore it. But every time his gaze met hers, the oddest thing happened to her heart.

  It was fitting that she and her mother were here, given Lady Briston’s history of welcoming those who had nowhere else to go to Millworth at Christmas. They had no family save Simon but they would not be here next year. While Teddy had spent a few Christmases here through the years, and was always made to feel like a member of the family, as were all the wanderers Lady Briston collected, she suspected they might not be welcomed back after she and Jack ended their engagement.

  Still, Teddy and her mother had each other now thanks to Cyril. Cyril’s threat had wrought an unexpected change in Lady Sallwick, and Teddy’s engagement appeared to have given her mother a measure of serenity as well. This was not the mother she’d known for the last four years nor was Mother the woman she’d been before their lives had altered irrevocably with her father’s death. No, this woman had a strength about her and a determination Teddy had never before seen, and she realized they were more alike than she had ever imagined. While Teddy was certain Mother would not be happy when she broke it off with Jack, nor would she be pleased about Teddy’s plans for her future, she suspected her mother would be far more accepting now.

  “. . . and of course, the rest of us agreed.” Lionel flashed an affectionate smile at his wife. “One wife was more than any man should have to handle.”

  The table erupted in laughter and Teddy joined in, even if she had no idea how the story had ended.

  Laughter and stories and the sharing of fond memories continued until at last Lady Briston declared dinner at an end. In the spirit of the evening, the gentlemen ag
reed to forgo their usual brandy and after-dinner cigars and joined the ladies in the parlor. Lady Briston’s special Christmas Eve punch was passed around and Lord Briston got to his feet.

  “It has been a long time, a very long time, since this family has been together under one roof for Christmas Eve. And of course this is Jack’s first Christmas at Millworth.” His gaze passed over the gathering, over all three of his daughters and their respective spouses or, in Dee’s case, fiancé, and settled on his wife. “I am most grateful to be here and most thankful for all of you.” He nodded at his brother.

  The colonel rose to his feet. “In the years my brother was away, Christmas was celebrated here without him and in spite of the sometimes crowded nature of the manor, thanks to Bernadette’s hospitality, there was still something missing. I suspect there always is when family isn’t together.” He paused for a long moment, then smiled wryly. “My brother knew what he was missing in the years he was not with us and tonight, for the first time, I know as well what it’s like to have your child and your wife together at Christmas. And our company is only enhanced by the addition of our very good friends, our dear Theodosia and Adelaide and Lucy. Thank you all for making this a Christmas Eve I will never forget.” He raised his glass. “To family and friends.”

  The toast and the sentimentality echoed around the room and Teddy suspected she was not the only one with a tear in her eye.

  The colonel cleared his throat. “Nigel and I would like to renew a Christmas Eve tradition we had as boys here at Millworth.”

  “Dear Lord, not a tradition,” Beryl said under her breath.

  “When we were children,” the colonel continued, “Christmas Eve was spent in the telling of tales of those who had gone before.” He paused in the manner of a master storyteller. “Those who are still with us.”

  Dee groaned.

  “Ghost stories?” Camille’s eyes lit with excitement. “I love ghost stories.”

  “As do we all, dear,” Lady Briston said with a smile. “Go on, Basil.”

  “Actually, we thought I’d begin,” Lord Briston said. “And we shall start with the story of lovers torn apart.”