My Insanity (The Insanity Series Book 1)

by Martin Länger

  The refreshed voice of a woman could be heard.

  “Hey, isn't that the daughter of Mrs. Jaeger? The little Emily? It feels like a small eternity since I've last seen her. I bet the little Lia has grown just as much.”

  “Didn't you hear it? Her sister died a few weeks ago in a horrible car accident,” another voice said.

  “Gosh, no! Even I've heard about that,” another female voice meddled. “My husband read about it in the papers, though he didn't tell me it was the child of the Jaegers.”

  “I would be cautious if I were you. My neighbors told me in confidence that Emily was supposedly responsible for the accident. Presumably even on purpose.”

  Emily felt small and insignificant as if her body had shrunk and she was once more the little girl that she used to be, all while the voices continued to chatter.

  “That sounds scandalous! Who is claiming such a thing?”

  “I didn't want to believe it myself, but they swear they have seen it with their own eyes. When you think about it, it makes sense. After all, it was her sister that was the more musically talented one.”

  “I don't even know what to believe anymore.”

  Their voices felt like they were getting louder and more agitated by the second.

  “Didn't the Jaegers say that they could only afford the apprenticeship for one of them?”

  “That's what I heard as well. It's been said that Lia had way more talent, which is why they chose her for the apprenticeship.”

  “Supposedly Emily was giving up her instrument by her own choice, but if you ask me, I'm not sure who would believe such nonsense. As if a child wouldn't be tormented by envy” The group started to condescendingly cackle.

  “Shh, not so loud. That little devil might hear us,” they added.

  “What a tragedy. I certainly couldn't go on like this.”

  “Lia was such a lovely and tender child.”

  “As a mother, I could never forgive the death of my child.”

  The voices raged on as their words got fiercer before the figures started to transform back into their gray, emotionless guises.

  A familiar voice started to catch Emily’s attention. It was the voice of her father. She felt him leading her away from the figures with his hand tightly wrapped around hers.

  “Don't listen to them, Emily. People like to talk about others, especially if their own life isn't fulfilling them. Don't give in to them. It's not your fault what happened. Your mother and I still love you more than anything else in this world. All of us will never forget and continue to cherish Lia. Together,” the voice of her father said, and little Emily nodded in response.

  Yet all the love she still received and all the understanding wasn’t helping it. Not once did the thought of guilt leave her mind. She started to close her eyes.

  “I will never forget as well. The day that my whole life changed,” she spoke, pressing her hands together, resting them on her chest as close as she could.

  “Lia, I'm so unbelievably sorry. I wish I could undo what happened. At times like these I even wonder what kind of aspect you would've brought forth…” She tried to hide her sorrow underneath her usual smile, but it didn't work.

  “Is that everything you can muster up?” exhaled an unexpected, ominous gestalt that appeared next to her. Promptly the darkness around her morphed itself into a strange room where she said on a morose, old stool in front of a piano.

  Its keys and appearance were already corroded, and tiny insects were starting to crawl all over it. Even some pieces were broken off, while mold and other greenish substances were growing at its feet.

  She started to have a look around through the room, but there was nothing except for ruptured concrete walls and broken windows around her.

  Slowly her eyes wandered to the side, looking at a large and inhuman figure that was waiting for her. It was dressed in a long coat with rose petals attached to its seam. While the head was covered by a wide hood in red, except for a spiky skull that poked out like some sort of beak. A long, scrawny arm raised itself from one of the sleeves and pointed at the instrument before them.

  “Play!” the monstrosity ordered her.

  She wanted to scream and stand up, but her body was unable to move even an inch. Her eyes were trembling as they watched the creature beside her. A resounding slap hit her face, ramming it almost into the keys of the piano.

  Blood was gathering in her mouth, overflowing from her lips and slowly dripping downwards to her ankles, crawling further until it reached the dull, concrete floor.

  Emily’s ears were still ringing from the impact, but even though she had trouble hearing, she felt its furious look resting on her. Something that was unnatural and terrifying.

  The creature stretched out its inhumanly long and bony fingers over Emily’s head until they had fully wrapped themselves around it

  “It's all your fault. Now, pay for your sins. There is only one reason to not deem your existence worthless,” it proclaimed.

  Its fingers were squeezing tightly around her head until its sharp fingernails started to claw into her flesh.

  Emily lost touch with all of her senses at once, as the terror grew inside her with every moment. Only once in her life had she felt the same fear and despair before. Tighter and tighter the hand squeezed her head, threatening to crush it.

  The blood ran down her chin, escaping the wounds the fingernails left.

  Without any life left in her, she stared at the instrument before her. Losing herself completely, while tears started to stream down her cheeks. Her tears of sorrow were mixing themselves with the red blood beneath the rotten stool she sat upon.

  “I never wanted to feel like this, ever again…” it went through her head.

  “I KNOW that it's my fault! I never forgot that, not even for one moment. I want to escape from here. I'm not as strong as you all make me out to be. PLEASE, HELP ME!”

  “Emily!” it echoed behind her, and someone grabbed her trembling fingers.

  It was Olivia, who looked over her with a concerned look on her face, as what seemed to Emily, must have been a miracle. She had returned.

  Back to the strange and cruel place where her heart was always beating twice as fast, for it not to break under the immense pressure and worries of the unknown.

  “I'm terribly sorry,” Balthasar sighed with his deep voice as he saw the sorrowful faces of the two young women.

  “It seems my foolish story reminded you of equally saddening events. That wasn't my intention at all.”

  Instinctively Emily felt a wake-up call as she looked at Olivia who seemed just as smitten.

  “Please don't bother yourself with us, Balthasar. Whatever lies behind us, I'm sure we'll overcome the path to the future together,” she tried to encourage them, though even her usual smile had not yet returned.

  “That's right. Always look forward!” Marion laughed next to them as she joined the conversation.

  “If it's not too much to ask I would you to continue, Balthasar. Any clues you might give us could help.” Surprisingly even Eveline followed suit as almost all of them were gathered together.

  “Hoho, that's very considerate of you, but I'm not sure there is much worth to an old man like myself,” he stroked gently over his round belly, as he looked upwards, reminiscing about his past.

  “I was married to my beautiful wife, Josefine, for almost forty years. We had both retired and bought ourselves a secluded piece of land, far away from all the noise. Enjoying the days in each other’s company.”

  “Tsk, sentimental bullshit. As if that brings us any closer to our goal,” it poured out of Darius who had fallen back a few steps, even though he would've never admitted it. Afterward he detached himself once more from the group with Gieldan and Willhelm coming along.

  Othilia looked timidly to the women and Balthasar as if she would've preferred to stay with them, but then decided to move closer to Willhelm’s side.

  Emily smirked as she observed
them because she got the feeling that Othilia had a far greater interest in humans, especially Willhelm, than anyone would've anticipated.

  With a small pause, Balthasar continued his story. “Every day we took out a few hours of the day to stroll over the wide meadows and fields, hand in hand. The fresh country air was blowing through her wonderful gray hair, and I knew, even though we were childless and the days not endless, that I was as happy as I could be,” he chuckled.

  “It was an almost youthful wish or hope that I would never have to miss this special time we had been graced with.”

  He sighed softly, while his eyes were getting watery. Though he held back any tears, with the rest of the group struggling with that as well.

  “Isn't it heartwarming how he still thinks about our feelings, even though we made him remember such sad memories?” Olivia whispered to the other women.

  All of them were oddly fascinated with the elderly man who captured their hearts as he reminiscent back to the wonderful days he experienced with his lovely wife. Even Othilia and Willhelm caught themselves slowing down occasionally just to be a part of it. Balthasar's head was downcast as he noticed the melancholic faces around him.

  “Old man!” shouted Willhelm in a manner that almost made Balthasar jump. Before he could even respond, he was vehemently hugged by the young man.

  “Stay strong, Balthasar! At first, I thought it wouldn't be appropriate to listen to your story, but now I understand. I get it now, how arbitrary and sickening all of it is. I don't hear any horror stories or features of ill-nature from your voice. You should’ve been the last person who’s trapped in here,” Willehlm said full of vigor, as he shook the surprised Balthasar.

  “The only place you should be at is the grave of your gallant wife, watching over your land, until you may return to her side,” he almost screamed in his outburst as he tightly clung onto him.

  “Ohohoho, not so adamant, my dear,” jolted the elderly man as he thanked Willhelm who had let go of him. He wasn't expecting such overwhelming warmth. Even Willhelm sensed a hefty pat on his back as he tried to turn himself around again.

  “So that giant stick up your arse is finally gone, huh?” Emily said with a big grin on her face and welcomed Willhelm with the others. Being put on the spot, he rubbed over his head and started to look away, most noticeably to Ludwig and Eveline, who had also gone silent.

  “Well…” He took a slight breath. “I just thought that we, as men, should show some composure and walk forwards with courage. In hopes that we find something that lets us escape from here, even if it's just the will to move on for the time being”

  Othilia’s eyes were getting bigger with every sentence that Willhelm spoke, even though she tried to hide it, she marveled at him at every chance she could get.

  Some mirth had returned to the group thanks to the story of one single person.

  Certainly, discontent, distrust, and fear were rooted deep within them, but they slowly realized that they were not alone with those feelings. With the exception of one single person who was still walking with Gieldan at the front.

  “Don't you think it's inappropriate to isolate yourself from the rest?” Gieldan coldly asked the lone wanderer.

  “And what do I gain from that? I'm sure every last one of us is here for a reason. Maybe you should look out for those other two,” Darius answered just as cold, as he pointed at the cautious Eveline and awkward Ludwig who were unsuspiciously avoiding attention. He looked into the demanding eyes of Gieldan and finished his sentence.

  “No one in this world is innocent.”

  Chapter 18 – Fog of Deceit

  “I'm honestly surprised that someone like you noticed them. Though, is ignorance and isolation really the right way?” Gieldan replied to Darius.

  “Pah, don't stress yourself with your fake friendliness. To bond with someone just ends in pain and destroyed hopes. Not that our suffering is of any concern to you aspects.”

  Gieldan began to smile and took a moment to answer.

  “It really is a shame that your aspect has been killed off. It would've been quite interesting to get to know him. Maybe then I could've told you a few things about yourself as well.”

  “Fortunately, we'll part ways soon enough, which is why I'm happy that I'm alone,” said Darius who tried to avoid Gieldan as best as he could.

  “Even your precious bird Emily will soon notice what all of this is about,” he paused. “All your lies will be laid bare for everyone to see,” he finished his sentence while whispering to himself.

  Even without seeing it, he could feel it without turning around. Gieldan’s indifferent gaze morphed itself into a focused and threatening expression.

  Almost, without him noticing, Ansia appeared next to Gieldan deriding the situation.

  “Kukuku, if you're not careful Gieldan, a human, of all things, will be the one to expose our secret.”

  “I don't remember to have asked for the opinion of a parasite,” Gieldan answered while wrinkling his nose, but the spiteful smile of Ansia remained and followed him.

  “Shouldn't you be more respectful to aspects who share the same goal as you? Kukuh,” she responded snarkily.

  Darius tried to leave the conflict of the two aspects to themselves just before Gieldan said his final words to him.

  “Well, young man, you should be careful, too. This place is quite dangerous without protection. I sure hope you won't be needing the help of us filthy aspects.”

  Darius knew it was a threat, while he already was shaken deeply to his core, he tried his best to not let them in on it. His steps took him further and further from the group as Ansia and Gieldan continued their discussion.

  “I'm deeply hurt that everyone thinks that I’m dead. Maybe I should start showing myself, after all,” a voice whispered into Darius' ear.

  “If you don't show yourself, you can at least shut your mouth, can't you?!”

  “As usual, I lose all interest in talking with you as soon as you open yours,” answered the voice in a derogatory manner.

  “I know I should be more motivated when I think about my heritage, but to be honest, I don't get what's so grandiose about it. Who gives a shit whether you or I die, isn’t that right, my dear Darius? I for one would even welcome your demise.”

  Darius acted like he didn’t hear the words of his aspect, and marched on while seemingly on edge. The rest of the group didn't notice any of the quips between the three at the front, still being occupied with their own conversation.

  “I bet you have many things on your mind as well, right Willhelm?!” suddenly Eveline took the initiative and put him on the spot once more. She was the only one who noticed how their eyes met with resentment.

  It seems like he really was taken by surprise and hesitated for a moment. All eyes were on him as Emily further encouraged him.

  “Come on, tell us!” Othilia requested as she closely pressed herself against his shoulder.

  “Ahaha, I don't think I can get out of this one.”

  “Not really,” Emily laughed with him.

  “Alright then. The last thing I clearly remember was me and my two sons playing in the playground. A loud roll of thunder resounded, and a downpour spilled itself over our heads. I rushed to my car with both of them in my arms, and after I closed the car door, everything suddenly fades to black.”

  “Do you believe that you…” faltered Olivia.

  “I don't know. If that was the case, it might as well be the worst joke I've ever seen. My little Joschua was six and my youngest son, Adam, was only five years old. They both need their father! I have to return to them.”

  For a moment nobody said a word until Emily stepped before the silent group.

  “Don't let your head down. I'm sure we'll find an answer together.”

  “You have my thanks. You are one hell of a tough lady,” Willhelm nodded.

  “Let me help as well, my dear Willhelm,” Othilia spontaneously followed up.

  Eveline
plods past Balthasar who saw how her face started to twist, as if she had seen something utterly disgusting.

  “Is everything alright Eveline? Are you not feeling well?” he worried as he got closer to her.

  “Everything's good. I just hope we find a way out soon,” she replied in a hasty tone, trying to evade his question.

  “Of course, all of us wish for that. Stay strong, it can't be much longer,” he answered full of compassion as they looked at the empty mountain scenery.

  “Tzitzitzi, the old geezer might not be so wrong in the end,” giggled Ansia who just had returned to Olivia’s side.

  As she said that, even Darius yelled from the front who started to sprint, followed by Gieldan and Willhelm. With incredible tempo, they followed them along the last yards along the cliffs of the mountain path.

  “It seems like we finally reached the end of the path,” Balthasar ascertained while looking upwards to wipe the sweat off his forehead before he suddenly noticed a shadow moving in the wide mountain cliffs.

  “What was that?” he asked Marion whom he stopped and pointed upwards.

  “What do you mean? It's just getting a little bit foggy, that's all.”

  “Fog?” He started to notice as well.

  They had been so focused on the everlasting scenery and their stories, that he hadn't realized that a thick fog had started to set in at the top. After a few more exhausting steps even the elderly man could see what had captivated the whole rest of them.

  Before them laid an old, worn down and depraved village, almost like the one they had just escaped with its nightmarish crypt.

  Destroyed houses were everywhere. Some burned down, some covered by swamp. It was almost as if they had never left the other village. Uneasy and cautiously they made their way through, closely keeping each other company through the ruins. The fog that had started in the mountains only got thicker by the moment, and a brutish stench irritated their sense of smell.