The Best Christmas Ever

by Cheryl Wolverton

  Justin seated himself next to her and willingly accepted Mickie’s squeezing in between them. A helpless smile filled his eyes, which were only inches away from her. His look said I tried.

  Sarah felt flattered. There was no doubt after today that Justin was acting more than just brotherly toward her. She had a feeling he had actually begun to like her. He might even be interested in her, if she wasn’t mistaken.

  She was surprised she didn’t think of André and miss him when Justin smiled at her. No, instead she thought only of how perfect Justin was for her and how wonderful it was to be out from under the constant strain of André being so passive and compliant whenever his parents had criticized her.

  She still hadn’t forgotten that Justin had let Drydan Watson go, after what she had told him. She felt a little guilty. After all, what had happened to her had nothing to do with the business end of Justin’s life; it had been strictly personal. And she would mention it to Justin—soon, because she didn’t want Drydan revealing anything if Justin truly was developing feelings for her. Yes, that was her task to do. Still, it was nice to know he had believed her and taken her side, even though she hadn’t asked him to.

  The stars twinkled brightly in the sky and the moon was almost full again. It was hard to believe she’d been at Justin’s over a month now.

  Speakers softly played Christmas music. Couples settled down in the hay, snuggling against the cool crisp wind. Funny that Mickie was the only child on the ride. Maybe because it was after dark and most families had already left the farm.

  Mickie wiggled between them. “This hay is poking me.”

  Justin reached to lift her onto his lap just as the ride started up. Mickie surprised them both by evading her daddy and crawling into Sarah’s lap.

  “I want Aunt Sarah to hold me.”

  Sarah’s heart expanded as the little girl nestled in her arms, resting her head against Sarah’s shoulder. She stretched her legs across Sarah’s lap, then frowned at her daddy.

  “She’s softer.”

  Justin chuckled. “I imagine she is.” But there was a tenderness reflected in his eyes from the small electrical lanterns overhead.

  Mickie found a strand of hair that was hanging over Sarah’s shoulder and stroked it with her tiny fingers.

  “She’s tired,” Justin murmured, though he sounded just a little choked up over his daughter’s need to be held by Sarah.

  “Am not!” Mickie piped up, then nestled closer.

  Sarah smiled and nodded slightly. She saw the gleaming moisture in Justin’s eyes and realized how much it affected him that Mickie didn’t have a mother. Sometimes a girl just needed a mom. She wondered how those many motherless children survived without the nurturing care of a mother. She thanked God she’d never had to find out, though she still missed her mom some now, then said a quick prayer that Mickie wouldn’t suffer from missing Amy.

  As the music of one of her favorite Christmas songs started, she began to hum along with it. The ride rocked them and in less than five minutes Mickie was slumped against her.

  “She’s asleep,” she said softly to Justin, who had been strangely quiet.

  “You have a beautiful voice,” he murmured.

  Sarah blushed and was glad it was dark. “Thank you.”

  “Please, go ahead, sing some more.”

  “Oh, I couldn’t,” she protested.

  “For me? You don’t have to sing loud enough for anyone else, Sarah. But please, do it for me.”

  How could she resist?

  The song “Away in the Manger” came on and she began to sing. “‘Away in the manger no crib for a bed, the little Lord Jesus lay down his swe—’”

  They hit a bump and she broke off, tightening her hold on Mickie. Justin moved his daughter’s feet and inched closer, then his arm encircled around her. He pulled her snugly against his side. His other hand came around and rested on Mickie’s leg.

  She continued singing softly, just so he could hear. On the second verse, Justin joined his voice with hers. He loved the feel of her against him, the protectiveness she brought out, the feelings of attraction. But most of all, he just enjoyed her presence. He couldn’t imagine his life without her.

  When the song was over, Justin turned toward Sarah. He wanted to ask her about coming to work for him, had thought to do it tonight. He knew he was enjoying her too much in his arms and that could lead to dangerous temptations at his house. After all, God had made man and woman to feel attracted to each other. But there were rules. And it was extremely difficult to follow those rules when the woman looked so longingly at him.

  So instead of discussing her future, he leaned forward and kissed her, tenderly, gently, a simple sharing. She’d been so tense the past week or so, but tonight Sarah was relaxed, not hiding anything from him. He liked that and wondered if she could read what was in his eyes.

  Seeing Mickie sleeping so contentedly in her arms, he remembered her outburst when Bill had shared the news about Marcy. He wondered how she really felt about André.

  Yes, that concerned him, because sitting here, looking at her like this, he realized he could give his heart to her—if she could simply love him back.

  Oh, he realized he was afraid to love again, but he didn’t know how to let go of that fear. Or if he should. Should he simply declare his feelings and not worry that she might feel obligated to accept anything from him because he had provided so much for her?

  No. He couldn’t do it. He needed to know that she had some sort of feelings for him other than gratitude.

  “Look, a meteorite!”

  He glanced up and saw a streak across the sky. It was gone almost immediately.

  “Do you suppose that’s what led the Wise Men to Jesus? That or a comet?”

  Justin shook his head. “I doubt it. After all, Jesus was almost two by the time they located him. Maybe it was a supernova.”

  “I guess the miracle wasn’t in what led them there, but that the Scriptures foretold it.”

  “Yeah, that and the miracle that Jesus was born into the world.”

  “And lived and died,” Sarah added, snuggling closer in his arms.

  He smiled warmly, thinking how wonderful it was to know true joy. “And that He rose again.”

  “And is always here for us. What love that is,” Sarah murmured.

  “How true. What love He had to provide such a plan of redemption.” Which reminds me, Justin thought, that even if Sarah never loves me I have a Heavenly Father who does. He knows my needs and desires and will fulfill them in the way He knows they should be fulfilled

  The truck slowed and they were back at the beginning point. Justin smiled at Sarah, lifted Mickie from her arms, then assisted Sarah in standing.

  “Thank you for the evening,” Sarah whispered as they walked toward the car.

  “Thank you, Sarah, for sharing it with us. I think Mickie really enjoyed not only the shopping and the tree but your company, as well.”

  “I enjoyed her, too.” She paused by the car door. “And being with you.”

  Potent words. He could easily picture the two of them together. He forced the thought away. “It was a very nice evening.”

  He walked around, strapped Mickie into her seat belt—Mickie simply sighed and continued to sleep—then slipped into his own seat.

  He turned on a music station that was playing Christmas music, then backed out of the parking place.

  “Why don’t you rest. It’ll take us at least forty-five minutes to get back.”

  “I’ll try,” she murmured, sounding sleepy.

  He shook himself, trying to get rid of the romantic thoughts going around in his head. They both needed time to let this relationship develop. And he’d make sure they had it. Control. He would just have to control his impulses until he was certain Sarah knew what she wanted.

  Whatever happened between them, he knew one thing: he wanted God’s will. That was the most important thing. He had to let God show him the answers.
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  Chapter Sixteen

  “Are you sure you want me going to the holiday open house?” Sarah asked Justin, pulling on her coat as she came down the stairs.

  Justin smiled. “I’d like you there as…protection.”

  “And just why do you need protection?”

  He gave her a look of mock outrage. “People like Stephanie,” he said. “There are three different ladies who have marked me single and seek me out any time I’m within two blocks of the school.”

  Sarah chuckled, and Justin smiled at the sound. He enjoyed listening to Sarah when she was happy. Her eyes sparkled and her whole demeanor radiated energy when she was in a good mood.

  “Daddy, I can’t go. I’ve got a tummy ache.”

  Justin turned at the sound of his daughter’s voice. Mickie, dressed in her red-and-green holiday outfit, had a hand on her tummy and stood near the hallway to his library.

  “When did this happen?” Justin asked, concerned, going to her and dropping onto one knee. He felt her head. It was cool. He checked her color, which was normal. Then he looked into her eyes. That was when he knew something else was going on.

  “A while ago,” Mickie mumbled.

  Sarah walked up and stroked Mickie’s head, going down on one knee by Justin. “I can stay home with her if you think this is serious.”

  Mickie’s eyes brightened.

  Justin’s suspicions deepened. Sometimes when Mickie didn’t want to go to school she said she had a tummy ache. But he’d thought they were through that stage.

  He wondered if maybe the teacher had sent home a note that he’d never gotten. He hesitated a minute, then made his decision. “Oh, I think Mickie’s well enough to go, aren’t you, sweetie? If you get sick then we’ll just stop by the doctor’s and see what he can do to help.”

  Mickie lowered her gaze. “Yes, sir,” she said, her mouth drooping.

  He stood and saw Sarah’s distress. Silently, he shook his head, indicating she shouldn’t say anything else.

  “Come on, pumpkin, let me carry you to the car. You’ve been running ahead of me lately and I still like to carry my little girl once in a while.”

  Mickie smiled, though she was still subdued. Walking toward the car, he placed a smacking kiss on her cheek. “Did I tell you today how much I love you?”

  “Maybe,” she replied, her eyes dropping.

  “No matter what, you’re the most important girl in my life. Nothing could ever change that.” He let her down and she climbed into the car.

  Sarah gave him a questioning look, but he didn’t explain. She decided to change the subject. “It sure is cold out tonight. Do you think it might snow?”

  Mickie brightened considerably. “Do you think we could make a snowman? Have you ever made a snowman, Aunt Sarah?”

  “Oh, my, yes. It’s been so many years, though, since we’ve had real snow around Christmas. You know what I wish? I wish we have a snowy Christmas so we can build a huge snowman.”

  “Well, we’ve got a couple of more weeks until Christmas, so you can keep wishing.”

  “So, Mickie, what do you want for Christmas?”

  Mickie suddenly quieted.

  “What? No wishes?”

  “Wishes don’t come true if you tell them, do they?”

  Justin saw Sarah smile, as if remembering her childhood. “Well, I know you’re not supposed to tell them, but sometimes it doesn’t matter. Besides, how are you going to get what you want if you don’t ask?”

  “I wrote a letter to Santa. He’ll know.”

  Sarah glanced at Justin. Justin shrugged slightly. He hadn’t known Mickie could write well enough to write an entire letter. He’d have to find it and see what he could do about fulfilling the list. He had to wonder if the Fashion Kathy Super House he’d bought might be on it.

  “Well, I know what I want,” Sarah announced.

  Justin smiled when Mickie asked, “What?” as if Sarah were getting ready to reveal some deep dark secret.

  “Actually, I bought it the other day. I wanted perfumed soaps.”

  “But, Aunt Sarah, you aren’t supposed to buy your own presents.”

  Sarah chuckled. “When you live on your own, you buy your own gifts.”

  “But you live with us.”

  Sarah blinked. “Um, well, actually, I work for you, sweetie. It’s a little different.”

  Justin was irritated by her explanation. He was also irritated that she obviously had lived alone so long that she’d forgotten what it was like to receive gifts. Or maybe she was just still so upset about André that she didn’t think anyone else would care to get her something special.

  “We’re here,” he said, glad to end the subject before they could ask him what he wanted. He was afraid he would end up saying what he wanted more and more since Sarah had moved in. He wanted a wife. And not just any wife. But he refused to face just who it was he wanted. He wouldn’t give up that last bit of fight and succumb to the emotions within him. Because if he did and he found out that Sarah couldn’t love him back, he wasn’t sure they would ever overcome the breach that would make in their relationship.

  Mickie was quiet again. When he stopped the car, she jumped out. “Come on, Aunt Sarah, I want you to see the playground first.”

  Yep, she was definitely in trouble, Justin thought. “Go on, Sarah. Meet me in the class in about five minutes.”

  She smiled. “Okay, Mickie, show me the playground.”

  He walked into the school and headed down the hall toward Mickie’s class. The first incident happened only twenty feet beyond the door.

  “Hey, great news. I’m happy to hear it.”

  The assistant coach slapped him on the back as he passed.

  Justin started to ask him what he meant, but the man was already talking with someone else.

  Great news?

  He continued down the hall. Two more people smiled and called out congratulations. Others whispered when he walked past.

  Had news of the merger and the additional two hundred jobs it would create for the local community leaked out already? He hadn’t wanted it out until everything was finalized, but maybe Phillip had let the cat out of the bag. What odd looks he was getting, he thought as he continued along the hall.

  The crowning incident came when the truth was finally revealed. A couple of parents with their children were just leaving Mickie’s class as he entered. There were other families around the different displays, but the teacher, Mrs. Bell, focused on him. Her long gray-and-black hair hung down her back, pinned off her face with two combs. Her skin was wrinkled, but her blue eyes twinkled with the joy that only a teacher who had spent thirty years teaching kindergarten and survived could possess. Her flowing floral skirt and long-sleeved white top perfectly fit the graceful, warm image she projected.

  “Well, congratulations, Mr. Warner. I was so happy when Mickie shared her news and…ah, well, this must be Mrs. Warner,” she said.

  Justin turned in surprise. Sarah was standing behind him, trying to cover her bafflement with a small smile. He glanced from Mrs. Bell to Mickie, who was studying the floor. A huge knot formed in the pit of his stomach. Not of anger, but of pain for what his little girl had done.

  He knew, he just knew what she had told everyone.

  “Did I say something wrong?” Mrs. Bell asked.

  But he ignored her, intent on his hurting child. Why hadn’t he realized she had been so affected by losing her mom?

  Kneeling, he tipped his daughter’s chin up until she met his gaze. Her eyes were already awash with tears. “Mickie, honey, have you been telling everyone that you have a new mommy?”

  He heard Sarah’s gasp, heard the teacher’s murmured, “Oh, dear,” but didn’t take his gaze off his daughter.

  “She makes me peanut butter-and-jelly sandwiches and fixes me cookies and comes to meet me after school.”

  “But there’s more than that to being a mommy, honey.”

  “And she hugs me and reads to me. And she smel
ls good,” the little girl said, her chin wobbling. “And now she’s gonna hate me, isn’t she?”

  Suddenly, as if it were too much for her, Mickie turned and ran off down the hall. Justin stood and started after her.

  “Let me,” Sarah said. “Give me a couple of minutes.”

  Then she was gone.

  “I’m so sorry, Mr. Warner. I had no idea. Mickie came to school one day and said that she had a new mommy, that her aunt Sarah was now her mommy. I just assumed that was Aunt Sarah and that you had married her.”

  “That was Aunt Sarah,” Justin said, “but I haven’t married her. I’ll check with you later about Mickie’s progress. Right now I need to go find her.”

  He pulled his coat around him and headed down the hall without a single word to anyone. His heart was breaking over the pain he’d seen in Mickie’s eyes. He wondered if Sarah was succeeding at removing that look.

  Mickie sat at the bottom of the slide, her face buried against her knees, when Sarah caught up with her. Sarah slowed to a walk. “Mickie, honey, may I sit down?”

  Mickie shrugged.

  Sarah took that as a yes. She picked up the girl and settled her on her lap, sitting on the swing instead of the slide. Mickie burst into fresh sobs. Slowly, Sarah pushed the swing back and forth, a gentle rocking motion as she let Mickie cry. She saw Justin in the shadows near the building but didn’t acknowledge his presence. He was staying put and allowing her to handle this, so he’d just have to wait. She was in no hurry.

  Finally, Mickie’s cries subsided. “I missed my mommy when she died,” Sarah finally said. “It made me very sad not to have someone around.”

  Mickie sniffled. “Daddy’s lonely.”

  “Ah, is that so?”

  Mickie nodded. “So am I.”

  “So am I sometimes. I miss your mommy, too, and wish she’d come back. She could make me laugh and make me mad. We had such fun.”

  “Did I have fun with her?”

  Sarah felt tears well. “Oh, yes, dear. She use to blow bubbles onyour tummy and hug you and love you, just as your daddy does now.”