Off the Record

by Rose, Alison

  This was so confusing. What was Johnson doing, singing about love to her mother?

  ‘Because you are my world

  And are my night

  You are my soft moon

  Shining so bright

  You are my sunshine

  Spread a glow across the sky

  And when I kiss you

  You will know why’

  Alex barely seemed to notice when Kate took her hand and gave her a tissue. She squeezed her daughter’s hand, letting her tears fall, her gaze never leaving Johnson’s.

  Is this what he wrote for her all those years ago? Kate felt cold. She suddenly felt frightened. I shouldn’t be hearing this. I don’t want to know that he loved her like that. And I can’t bear to see that she felt the same. Oh God! She closed her eyes, willing the song to end. But Johnson sang on, and Kate sat there, trying to block it out, feeling her mother’s hand trembling in her own.

  ‘When we’re free

  From all these expectations

  We will be together I know

  And as days fly by

  I want you by my side

  And we can let our feelings flow

  Because you are my world

  You are my life

  And we’ll stay together

  Through the pain and strife

  I’ll mend your heart

  If you mend my mind

  I love you so much

  And that’s not a lie

  So when I kiss you

  You will know why’

  As the final notes faded away, there was a moment of utter silence. Kate felt Alex began to rise. At that same moment, the whole arena rose, cheering, clapping, and whistling, bringing them all back to reality.

  Alex shrieked, startled. Johnson laughed. Kate jumped to her feet, opened her mouth and screamed with the crowd, releasing some of the hysteria that seemed to be suffocating her.

  On stage, Bob relieved Johnson of his guitar and the stool was removed as he stood and acknowledged the crowd’s adoration. When he bowed, he caught Alex’s eye and smiled. Kate shivered.

  The band had drifted back onto stage while the attention had been on the main man, and within seconds they had launched into the song that Kate had been expecting.

  Alex subsided back into her chair as the crowds around her cheered and yelled their approval of Johnson’s performance. She felt herself shaking, shocked that he had played that song – her song. He wrote it and played it to her in his parents’ basement just days before she left him all those years ago. She’d cried and told him it was the most beautiful song she’d ever heard. He’d told her it was for her and he wouldn’t sing it for anyone else.

  Had he really never sung it between then and now?

  The band had returned and were playing the introduction to one of Johnson’s biggest hits, a raunchy rock number that had everyone going wild again. Alex stayed where she was, watching Johnson, oblivious to the thousands of people around her.

  Jake, the security manager who had caught Kate and Paul kissing in the lift on her first day, came and got them before the end of the second encore and escorted them through the cordons of security guards and barriers protecting the band from the crowds. Kate was feeling oddly reluctant. She liked Johnson Brand, but she wasn’t sure how she felt about the song he had sung to her mother.

  She was beginning to realise that the emotions between the two of them ran far deeper than she’d imagined. She had always thought that her father was the love of her mother’s life, and Alex had never contradicted that assumption. But if she’d really loved her husband so much, why was Johnson having such an effect on her? That acoustic song had shaken her mother so much she had hardly noticed the final number.

  And of course there was Paul. Something had happened tonight. Obviously Greg had failed to turn up and Paul had taken his place. He’d been great – the sounds he produced were pure and faultless. But something wasn’t right. Paul hadn’t been happy up there. And the way he’d looked at her – and the way she hadn’t been able to look away – had unnerved her. It was as though he’d needed to focus on her to get through the show.

  She didn’t want to be needed by anyone at the moment. She just wanted time alone to think.

  As they reached the back stage area, the band came spilling off the stage for the final time. Johnson saw them and stopped, waiting. Kate watched helpless as her mother took a step towards him. Johnson opened his arms and she walked into them. He just held her, wrapped close to him, his head resting on hers. For a moment, she was lost in the memory of Paul holding her like that, and how wonderful it felt. Her heart sank.

  ‘Hey, Dad! C’mon! Let’s go!’

  Kate was distracted as Paul pulled his damp T-shirt off and reached for a fresh shirt being proffered by a waiting stage-hand. Memories of their first encounter and her first glimpse of his firm, broad, naked chest brought a flush to her cheeks.

  Paul grabbed Kate’s hand as he passed her and she found herself being dragged along as he headed for the exit. She knew they had a narrow window of opportunity before fans began gathering at the stage door, blocking the band’s escape route, so she gritted her teeth and ran with him, even though she’d rather be running in the opposite direction.

  They made it into a waiting limo as the audience began to swarm out of the arena. Johnson kept an arm around Kate’s mother, who laughed breathlessly, looking through the window at the people surging towards them.

  As soon everyone was seated, the doors were slammed behind them and the car moved off. Kate removed her hand from Paul’s grasp. He looked at her and frowned. She ignored him, turning her face to look out of the window too.

  With a sigh Paul sank back into the leather upholstery and tried to relax. It was over. He’d done it. He’d performed on stage – with the JBB no less – and nothing bad had gone down. Not even a bum note! He allowed himself a small smile and felt some of the tension leave his body. Life is good. He let his head drop back against the headrest and closed his eyes. I kicked ass tonight. He wasn’t stupid enough to think no one had noticed, but maybe his dad’s decision to play that extra number – a song even he hadn’t heard before – would take the heat off him. Either way, they were going to have to do some careful dancing with the press over the next couple of days. He hoped his dad knew what he was doing. He might as well have put a neon sign over Alexandra Armstrong saying ‘here she is – come see the Dream Woman’. Damn! Ah, hell, there’s nothing we can do about it tonight.

  Paul’s neck and shoulders felt stiff, and he shifted a little, trying to loosen some of the knots in his muscles. He wondered whether Kate would take pity on him and give him a back-rub.

  Next to him, Kate shifted away. Paul moved again, re-establishing contact. He liked feeling her warmth. It felt good to have her next to him. No matter how much he tried to treat her like the rest of the crew, she got to him. Kate Armstrong was driving him crazy. He wanted her, but he knew he shouldn’t do anything about it. But right now his hormones were drowning out his reason.

  She shifted again, although there wasn’t anywhere for her to go in the confines of the limo with the whole band crammed into the vehicle. Well, he figured she couldn’t read his mind, so she wasn’t trying to get away from giving him a massage. But she wasn’t her usual self tonight. Hell, neither am I!

  But Kate’s quiet mood was unexpected. He’d seen how excited she’d been about her mom coming to the show, yet right now she was acting like her parent wasn’t even there. She hadn’t even asked him why he’d been on stage instead of Greg.

  ‘You OK?’ he asked softly, leaning in to give them a little privacy. Something had spooked her, and he wanted to find out what was wrong.

  ‘Great,’ she responded, keeping her gaze focused outside the car.

  ‘You don’t look it.’

  ‘No, well, I don’t want to talk about it right now, OK?’ she whispered.

  So something had definitely pissed her off. ‘OK. Maybe later.’
/>   ‘Don’t hold your breath,’ she muttered softly, keep her attention firmly fixed on the window.

  Sensing that he wouldn’t get any more out of her right now, he turned his attention to her mother. ‘Mrs Armstrong. It’s nice to meet you, ma’am.’

  ‘Oh, Paul. Yes, it’s nice to meet you too.’ Alex took his proffered hand and smiled. ‘I enjoyed your playing this evening. It was all wonderful!’

  ‘Thank you. Glad you could make it. Dad was like a kid waiting for Christmas before the show. I hate to think what a grouch he’d be if you hadn’t showed.’

  Alex laughed and blushed. ‘Really?’ She looked at Johnson for confirmation.

  He nodded solemnly. She leaned closer to him. ‘I’m glad I came.’

  He smiled and kissed her temple. ‘Good.’

  Paul noticed Kate shift slightly against his side. Her face was still turned away, but he realised that she could see his father and her mother reflected in the tinted glass. The realisation that she wasn’t happy about the older couple’s physical closeness startled him. Is that what had gotten her rattled?

  He looked back at his dad, struck by how happy he looked right now. Whatever Kate’s problem was, he figured there wasn’t much she could do about it. If their folks wanted to get reacquainted, they were old enough to make up their own minds. Kate sighed and shifted her gaze from the couple reflected in the window to his own image. He grinned. She pulled a face at him. Paul leaned closer still and crossed his eyes, his tongue lolling to one side. Unable to withstand, Kate laughed.

  ‘Idiot,’ she said.

  ‘Hey, I didn’t start it,’ he smiled as he felt her body relax a little.

  ‘You were quite good tonight,’ she told him softly. ‘Why didn’t you tell me you were going to play?’

  ‘That’s because I forced him into it at the last minute,’ said Johnson. ‘Greg was a no-show, so Paul didn’t have much choice.’

  ‘Well, you were great,’ said Kate. Her mother nodded in agreement, smiling at Paul.

  ‘You have been honoured, ladies, by my one and only public performance,’ he replied solemnly. And by way of celebration I am most definitely going to have to kiss Kate before the night is out. Right now, anything is possible.

  She looked like she didn’t believe a word he said, but before she could say any more, Paul turned to her mother. ‘So, Mrs Armstrong. Do I call you Reverend, Alexandra, or Sandy?’

  ‘Oh I think it’ll save confusion if you all call me the same thing, don’t you? I haven’t been called Sandy for years, so Alex would be easier.’

  ‘OK Alex. Welcome aboard the JBB tour.’

  As Paul, Johnson, and Alex carried on a conversation about the gig and how the rest of the tour had been going, Kate made a deliberate effort to put her concerns aside and relax. Her mother was here, and she was happy. Kate would worry about the questions that rose in her mind later, when the Brand men were out of the way. Just as she would think about how Paul Brand made her feel later – much later! In the meantime, she wouldn’t do anything to spoil this for her mother.

  The car began to slow. Kate watched bemused as Paul ran his hands through his hair and checked his breath in the cupped palm of his hand.

  ‘OK, time to get going,’ he announced. ‘How do I look?’

  She gave him a quizzical look. ‘You look like a rock star that’s just finished a gig. Why?’

  He grinned. She tried hard not to grin back. She found his suddenly playful mood almost irresistible. She’d seen the others like this after a gig. It was pure adrenalin.

  ‘Great!’ The car stopped outside a night club. ‘C’mon! I wanna dance with the hottest chick in town.’

  Kate shrieked as he grabbed her hand and pulled her from the car. ‘Hey! Stop it! What’s going on?’

  The older couple joined them on the pavement just as Kate regained her balance.

  ‘It’s Jake’s birthday,’ he explained. ‘This place is ours for the next couple of hours.’

  ‘You might have told me,’ she sighed, as Paul urged her towards the entrance. ‘I would have bought him a card.’

  ‘No problemo. He hates cards. But he loves to dance. He can have you for one dance, but the rest of the night is mine, OK?’

  Kate glared up at him, annoyed by his proprietary tone. After a week of acting like a polite stranger, she wasn’t about to let him start throwing his weight about and getting her hopes up. A night dancing in his arms followed by more of the friendly treatment would be unbearable.

  ‘Oh, don’t worry, sweetie.’ she purred, patting his cheek. ‘If you want to dance with Jake that badly, I’ll pass and leave you two alone for the evening.’

  Behind her, their parents exploded into laughter. Paul blinked, his face a picture, as she stalked into the club, leaving him standing in the street.

  Chapter Fourteen

  She spent the next hour circulating, talking and laughing with the band. Various members of the entourage and crew arrived after packing up the tour trucks ready for the journey to the next venue. No one had seen what happened to Greg.

  ‘What a jerk,’ sneered Mick, the drummer. ‘If he doesn’t get himself straight, he’ll never work with a decent band again.’

  Kate frowned. ‘But he could have a good reason for disappearing like that. He might be ill.’

  ‘Ha! Sick with love, I reckon. Some chick has been callin’ him, and she ain’t his missus!’

  ‘How do you know it isn’t?’

  He gave her a narrow-eyed stare. ‘I like you, Kate, but sometimes I have to remind myself that you’re a journalist’

  She raised her eyebrows and gave him a haughty look. ‘And your point is?’

  ‘What are you aiming to put in your column this week?’

  She shrugged. ‘I thought I might concentrate on what rotten teases drummers are when they’ve had a beer or two. Come on, Mick, you’ve read my columns. I don’t do sleazy. I go for human interest. After that one I did on you the paper’s been snowed under with letters from drummers in the UK wanting masterclasses from you. There’s even been an offer for you to make your own training video.’ He nodded, a satisfied smile on his face. ‘Greg’s a great musician too,’ she went on, ‘and like everyone else on the tour he’s been pleasant and welcoming. Do you really think I’m going to do some sort of sleazy tabloid exposé?’

  ‘I guess not,’ he conceded. ‘But you wouldn’t be the first if you did. This business is full of sh … er … unpleasant people.’

  ‘So are you going to tell me about Greg’s girlfriend?’

  He shook his head. ‘Sorry, Kate. Nothing personal, you know? But I figure he needs to get his head together without having the whole world watching. And I reckon if he works it out and dumps her before his wife finds out, then no harm done.’

  ‘You are kidding, aren’t you? No harm done?’

  He shrugged again, looking more uncomfortable by the minute. ‘Some guys get tempted. If they can get it out of their system without anyone finding out, then they’ve got a chance to save their marriage. But if you write about it, he’s toast. He’ll lose his family and his job. Johnson won’t give him another chance if he finds out he’s been cheating on his missus.’

  Mick wandered off to get another beer, leaving Kate alone for the first time since she’d entered the club. She took a sip of wine and looked around. She’d concentrated on everyone she’d talked to, but she had always been aware of her mother and Johnson. And she’d known exactly where Paul was most of the time too.

  Johnson never left her mother’s side. The couple circulated, talking to people, laughing and smiling, always holding hands. Kate tried her best to ignore them, but the implications of it all were running around her head like a stuck record. When Johnson took her mother in his arms for a slow dance, she had to look away.

  ‘Gotcha!’ A strong arm snaked around her waist and she was lifted off her feet and spun round. ‘Now, milady. You are my prisoner, and your forfeit is to dance for my pleasure.’ Pa
ul’s soft voice in her ear, his warm breath on her neck, sent shivers racing down her spine again.

  ‘You really have to work on that accent. It’s terrible.’

  ‘Irrelevant. You’ve been on the run all night, and now I’ve got you. You and I are going to dance. Together.’ He pulled her close.

  ‘This number’s a bit fast for a smooch,’ she said, privately relieved that the tempo had just picked up.

  ‘Shut up and move, Armstrong.’

  ‘It’s not a slow dance.’

  ‘Isn’t it? Listen.’

  With a soft laugh she laid her cheek against his broad chest. She listened to his strong, slow heartbeat and began moving in time with it.

  ‘You really were good tonight. Why don’t you play in public more often?’ she asked a few minutes later.

  ‘I’m a writer, not a performer.’

  She looked up. His jaw was rigid with tension. She wanted to kiss it, soothe it. Taste it. Down girl, behave!

  ‘Why can’t you be both?’

  ‘Because I don’t want to.’

  ‘That’s crazy. Thousands would kill for the chance to play with the JBB – or any band for that matter. Why would you not want to do it?’

  He flinched, his hold tightening perceptibly. For a moment Kate thought he was going to thrust her away and leave her standing in the middle of the dance floor. Instead he took a deep breath and visibly relaxed. The tension remained in his eyes, though.

  ‘I told you, I don’t do interviews. And I don’t perform. So quit it already.’

  She wanted to argue, but realised it wouldn’t do any good. ‘OK, Mr Grumpy,’ she sighed, resting her head on his chest.

  They danced for a while, Paul holding her close, no matter what the tempo of the music. It meant dodging others who were throwing more energy into their moves, much to everyone’s amusement. Finally, Kate managed to persuade him to get her a drink and they left the others to it.

  They found a relatively quiet corner and sat down. Kate sighed and relaxed.

  Bob, the guitar technician, walked passed and Paul jumped up to speak to him. Kate didn’t know what was being said, the music was too loud to hear anything else. When Paul returned to her side, he took a long draught from his beer.