Though it would’ve been good if we had just gone away, no matter what kind of sleight of hand I use, it would just be a matter of time before Haruhi assaulted the Student Council room. No doubt she’d leap into action before the day is over. And I’m certain she’d be dragging me by my necktie as she went.
“But of course, not everything can be called a Literature Club activity. Holding a reading circle in the clubroom, writing book reports on the chosen book for the day―――copying grade schoolers won’t make the cut. I, at least, wouldn’t allow it.”
“So what would you do?”
The glint in Haruhi’s eyes didn’t fade as she inclined her head a little.
“Kyon, aside from reading books, what does the Literature Club do around here? Any ideas?”
“Not one.”
What I said had come from deep within my heart. You should ask something like that from Nagato.
“There is only one requirement.”
The President said, ignoring our conversation.
“You have to publish an organ. According to our records, even though the past generations of the Literature Club were always stricken by a shortage of members, they were still able to issue one volume every year. This activity is most likely to give you exposure. The Literature Club, self-explanatorily, is a club that infuses art into the creation of sentences. You don’t get a story from just reading.”
So that means Nagato hasn’t been doing what a club member is supposed to at all for the last year. She’s done nothing but read since whenever. ……Oh that Nagato.
My head shook involuntarily. I did not want to remember that bespectacled Literature Club member who wore a troubled face in front of an outdated computer at a time like this. Seeing her in my dreams at night is enough.
“I disapprove.”
Seeming to misunderstand my behavior, the President wore an even more disapproving face, himself.
“Do not forget that this is the minimal concession. By all rights, we could have announced this plan during the Culture Festival. I want you to feel a little obligation to me for waiting so long. Then again, if it were anyone other than me, you would probably go on free interminably.”
Setting myself and Nagato aside, only Haruhi would want to go on free.
“I cannot let that happen. I won the election for President of the Student Council by pledging for school reformation. As you have known, the Student Council then was just the Student Council in name, and there was no room for student independence. Following the plans that had been drawn up in the staff room, I made serious on what I had said like a body of air.”
The President delivered such a rousing speech indifferently.
“I wished to break away from that situation. Students wanting more items to be added to the cafeteria menu while getting better value for their purchases; even such trivial matters have to be discussed, and I thought that by negotiating on the side of the school, the way to realization would follow.”
Though I’m grateful that he’s working so hard for the sake of the students, how about listening to a single student’s wish to be recognized as a Club or Study Group instead of a Brigade?
“I am making ‘serious reformation’ my slogan. If I formally approve such an unserious brigade, my reputation would crash to the earth. I will not accept it.”
Said The President, after rejecting my request,
“The term is one week. One week after today, you must finish publishing two hundred copies of the Literature Club magazine. Otherwise, I will recommend that the Literature Club be suspended, and you must surrender the clubroom. No complaints will be considered.”
Anyway, about that journal. Is it something like an anthology?
“Fine, then.”
Haruhi accepted simply. Nagato should be the one saying that, not you.
Nagato would speak nothing, of course, but even if it might’ve been better for Haruhi to respond since there was nothing more to say, I feel that Nagato’s silence here was different from her usual, taciturn disposition.
“…………”
Nagato had been staring at Kimidori-san the whole time, and they both did not turn their eyes away at all. Nagato was expressionless, and Kimidori-san had on a weak smile.
Looking happy for some reason I didn’t understand, Haruhi didn’t seem to recognize Kimidori-san, the SOS Brigade’s first and only client, at all. It seems like she’s been so busy glaring at the President, that her thoughts hadn’t even turned to the secretary. Maybe she doesn’t remember her face. She never saw that kamadouma.
Haruhi, with a face like a mathematician that had just proven a proposition,
“A journal, a club journal, huh? Is it something like a doujinshi? People writing stories, essays, columns, poems, and stuff?”
“The contents are not of my concern,” the President said. “You may use the printing room as you wish. You may write whatever you wish. However, there is a second part to the requirements. We will establish a time table for the production of the journal, and you must follow it. And though it should go without saying that distribution will be free, you must follow this as well. Promotional activities and personal deliveries are not allowed. That includes going out as bunny girls, among other things. Not one person should stubbornly neglect this, because if all copies are not out within three days, a penalty will be imposed.”
“What kind of penalty?”
Haruhi, who was a sucker for penalty games, leaned forward with glittering eyes.
The President, in an annoying manner,
“When that time comes, we will inform you. But you will want to be prepared. We can start with performing volunteer activities, indefinitely. As I have repeatedly said, this is a concession.”
The arbitrary destruction of a home giving way to conflict would be unfortunate, the President seemed to be thinking. Even if you haven’t read the history of the Akou clan, it’s easy for anyone to guess. Furthermore, the opponent was Haruhi. I can’t think that the President is pleased with himself even in his own head. The pitiful school itself would run away.
Although I’m leaving whether this is submission or a concession to future judgment, this “Organ Publication” is just a way of evading the matter on the Student Council’s part. And even if you call it an organ, it’s in no way related to Koizumi’s background, so it should just be a journal. Or maybe Literature Club publication. You say you’re seeking the fruits of artistic writing borne of our club activities, but just how are we to do that? Who’s going to do the writing? Even more, why do I see Haruhi looking strangely delighted?
“Well, isn’t that interesting!”
Haruhi showed a smile like a child who had just learned a new game.
“An organ, a journal, or a doujinshi is okay. We’ll do it even if you say there’s no use in trying. For Yuki’s sake. She’ll be troubled if the Literature Club is no more. That room already belongs to me, and what I hate more than anything is when something of mine is taken.”
Haruhi’s arm wasn’t on me, but was stretched around the nape of Nagato’s neck.
“Well then, if that’s been settled, we will go into a meeting without delay. Yuki, I’ll credit your name as publisher in the copyright page. I’ll be taking care of everything else, of course, so don’t you worry. First things first, let’s all go and investigate how to publish an organ!”
Haruhi held the back of Nagato’s collar,
“…………”
She lightly pulled on Nagato, who had been standing quietly, as if Nagato were a balloon, opened the door with a bang, then started running with a force like the initial velocity of a rifle bullet.
Though I saw Nagato floating on only her tiptoes when I looked over my shoulder, the sight disappeared in an instant; Haruhi, who had come bounding into the Student Council room like the wind, grew into the power of a typhoon before she passed.
“Such a noisy girl.”
The President, who had spoken such a sensible
impression, shook his head, and swung his eyes to the nearby table.
“Kimidori-kun, that is enough for you as well. You may leave.”
“Yes, Mister President.”
Kimidori-san meekly bowed her head in assent, closed the minutes, and then quietly stood up. After returning the notebook to the bookshelf, she nodded lightly to the President before starting to walk.
As she passed by, she gave me a quick bow. Without meeting my eyes, she exited through the door that Haruhi had flung open. From that last, soft flutter of her hair, came a most wonderful smell. It was gone before I knew it.
As I was thinking about the connection between Nagato and Kimidori-san, the President snorted through his nose and spoke.
“Koizumi, close the door.”
Sensing the complete change in tone from a while ago, my eyes went back to the President. Koizumi closed the door, and the President, after confirming that it had been locked, pulled a nearby pipe chair to himself and sat down roughly, then threw his legs over the table.
What?
However, it was still too early to act surprised. The President frowned while searching around in his uniform pocket, and just as I was thinking, he was bringing out a cigarette and a lighter, put it to his lips and lit it, and did he just start puffing out smoke?
It was an act that you’d never think the President of the Student Council would do. As I was feeling like I had discovered the scene of an arson that was committed by a fireman,
“That’ll do, Koizumi.”
The President left the cigarette in his mouth as he took off his glasses and brought out an ashtray he had been keeping in his pocket
The President left the cigarette in his mouth as he took off his glasses, and, instead of a cell phone, brought out an ashtray he had been keeping in his pocket,
“Even if the plans changed a little, it happened just as you said. But it is a real pain, having to act like an idiot. Put yourself in my position. Talking continuously in that damned serious voice is tiring.”
Tapping the ash from his smoldering cigarette into the ash tray, the cool expression that the President had maintained until then changed completely.
“What’s with being Student Council President anyway. I don’t want to be something like that. It’s nothing but trouble. Moreover, all I’m doing is making an enemy of that girl with the over-active brain. Talk about a stupid job.”
The President, who, in an instant, had completely turned prickly, pushed the cigarette, which was giving off some nasty fumes, to the side of the ash tray to put it out, then he pulled out a new stick and turned to me.
“Do you smoke?”
“I’ll pass.”
I shook my head, and as I finished, I took the opportunity to give Koizumi’s smiling profile a stabbing look.
“Is the President one of your associates?”
Probably, I thought. I tried to make a strange sort of eye contact; if you’re going to talk about the Literature Club, you shouldn’t go through Koizumi and company and just go straight to calling on Nagato. I don’t have to think much; there should be no reason for me to take the Student Council’s side.
Koizumi caught my look, and showed off his smiling face in reply.
“If you call him an associate then he is an associate, but he’s an associate in a difference sense from Arakawa-san and Mori-san. He isn’t necessarily a part of the ‘Organization’.”
Koizumi glanced at the President, who had been puffing the smoke of his second cigarette up to the ceiling,
“He is our agent within the school. To talk a little bit about his motives, he provides us assistance in exchange for certain conditions. If Mori-san and I are part of the inner sanctum, then he is of the nave.”
It’s okay no matter how many you people are, but how’d you get the President of the Student Council to do that for you?
“You could say that it is the result of tremendous effort on my part. I made him, half-hearted as he is, stand for candidacy, strove to make him the leading contender with the recommendation of the previous Student Council President, and gain the favor of the constituency, and after getting the votes of the majority, we worked on our electoral campaign to get an even bigger advantage, until finally we succeeded in putting him up as president. It was rather laborious work.”
What an appalling story.
“For his success with the presidential polls, the necessary cost was about the same as the expense for a trifling political party to run in the snap elections for the House of Representatives.”
The story went beyond appalling, and was now causing the life to drain out of me.
“According to Koizumi’s story.”
As the President coughed up smoke in irritation,
“Before that idiot girl Suzumiya thinks up something strange or something like that, it was deemed necessary for me to become president. Because of this, I was made to take on this role and wear a face suitable for the Student Council President. Could there really be a story so ridiculous? I was even made to wear those glasses for show.”
The story had become even more appalling than before.
“After comprehensively investigating the image of what Suzumiya-san pictures the President of the Student Council to be, we found him to be the one most fitting in this school. Under the circumstances, we did not consider his nature. Looks and atmosphere alone were material.”
And he was also careless enough to be convinced by Koizumi’s explanation.
Tall, handsome, and bespectacled; it was irrelevant that he was a pompous upper-classman. He was also taking the unpleasant duty of filling the Haruhi-type bad guy position as the Student Council President that was using his station to charge a bevy of false accusations on a tiny cultural club.
Indeed, that is what Haruhi has been waiting for: a quick and easy villain.
However, the fact that you went to all that trouble to produce a Student Council President to Haruhi’s satisfaction, means that Haruhi isn’t so omnipotent after all. If she really was an almighty and all-knowing god, you wouldn’t have to work so much or anything. And working hard for all that maneuvering; isn’t that exactly what you did?
“But because of our exertions, a president that suited Suzumiya-san’s wishes was produced as a result, and since that was still her desire, can you not say that it was realized through her being almighty? Since, consequently, that is still what happened.”
He’s rationalizing again. Only Tsuruya-san can outrival Koizumi’s mouth.
The President put out his cigarette in irritation,
“Anyway, Koizumi. Next year, you better declare for candidacy and become Student Council President. If you’re saying you want to prevent a situation where Suzumiya or someone declares for candidacy, this time you should just do it yourself.”
“Well now, what shall I do? I’ve been relatively busy, and I’ve got a feeling that the Suzumiya-san of these days wouldn’t be a problem even if she became Student Council President.”
More like a big problem. If Haruhi personally sets out to subjugate the school, what are you going to do? I have a premonition that we’re going to be dragged into a troublesome situation somehow. She may be planning to SOS Brigade-ize North High’s entire student body. That girl, she might just assume that every student is the Student Council President’s subordinate. The whole school will become alternate space.
Well, I don’t think Haruhi’s going to get the seat of the President of the Student Council as long as the voting is done honestly, so I guess it’s okay. I still believe that North High students have common sense, if not good sense. Unless Koizumi does something strange, no matter what kind of election activities are done, Haruhi probably won’t get to reign at the top of the whole school.
As I let out a sigh,
“In other words, Koizumi, this is another one of your scenarios. The Student Council plotting to scrap the Literature Club―――or pretending to be, you have again sowed the seeds for that girl to kill some ti
me.”
“But it is only a seed.”
Koizumi blew into the smoke that had been hanging in the air,
“What happens from here on is unknown. If we get to the settlement date for the club journal, and we haven’t finished, or if we are not able to meet the requirements…….”
He nimbly shrugged his shoulders.
“When that time comes, we’ll just come up with another game. Your brain alone would suffice.”
Participating as an observer is okay, but if it’s a position where I have to question myself on problems that I’ve been saddled with, then I’m sorry. Generally, how will doing such a thing benefit me?
“About my acting as the Student Council President,” said the delinquent President. “I do it because it is delicious. First is the grades. That was the biggest incentive that Koizumi used to persuade me. And you said that I’ll have an edge on my college exams. You better not forget that.”
“Of course I remember. Naturally, we are making arrangements for this to happen.”
The President turned to Koizumi with eyes that looked like they were interrogating a suspicious person and, hfff, let out a breath through his nose,
“I should hope so. Being the President of the Student Council is just too much work, but I’ve come to understand a few things these past few months. The Student Council from before was really just a bunch of useless suits. It didn’t matter if they were there or not. Meaning, we can play around with things as much as we want.”
That was the first smile the President had shown. Though it seemed to have a bit of vileness, it was a much more human expression than his calm and cool mask.
“Respect student independence; that’s such an empty slogan. Just how do you interpret that? My interest is particularly piqued by the budget. Now that is yummy to lay your eyes on.”
The President was getting more and more surprising. That’s just like what Haruhi would expect. He’s a villain, all right.
Volume 8 - The Indignation of Suzumiya Haruhi Page 4