Time for Raine

by C. Barry Denham

  He couldn’t stop admiring the special little girl who snuggled next to him on the couch. Eddie Murphy’s antics brought giggles and laughs, but the distraction of the movie also bought him some serious thinking time to digest what the events of the last few days had brought to them.

  He fought to stay focused on the mindless movie for most of the early evening. Raine was exhausted. As the night and movie pressed on, her eyelids drooped. She nodded and was soon asleep, as cute as a bug in her long pink princess gown. He carried her into her bathroom, sat her on the toilet, and prepared her toothbrush. She flushed, stood, and staggered, while he brushed and flossed laboriously. She let out a big sigh and a “Daddy, I love you,” and was asleep before Sean laid her between Ariel and Belle. He kissed her rosy cheek and watched her for a moment before turning out the light.

  As always, standing for a moment next to her bed, he thought of her mother. Patty was always there in spirit, sharing every part of his day, every thought in his head. He thought of her countless times during the day, and often found himself thinking, What do you think about that, Patty? or Can you believe our daughter, sweetheart? Raine grew and changed every day, and he had to remind himself that most of the memories Raine had of her mother were the ones he had shared with her. Raine remembered nuances from looks Patty gave her, and time spent during midnight feedings. Yet with the recent parade of events, all the memories seemed more elusive of detail. Sadly, it was becoming harder and harder for him to picture Patty. Her image had blurred, especially in the past few weeks.

  He always tried to keep the memories alive, yet in perspective. Strangely, his daughter aided in that process. Although he continued to answer the many questions concerning her mom, Raine asked them with less frequency now. As much as Sean missed Patty, it was better not to dwell so much on the past. Except for a small, framed photo of her mother, which sat on the bedside table in Raine’s room, there was little indication of her in the house. He felt guilty. Had he removed most of the mementos because they made him miss her more? Maybe, or was it because they reminded him how lonely he was?

  There were times when he dwelled on his need for a woman. But never so much as he needed one at that very moment, alone with his thoughts and the darkness of Raine’s room. This thought, in itself, represented a big change for his life, one he hadn’t felt during the last two years. But he didn’t need just any woman. She would have to be a very special one to fill the void left by Patty.

  In spite of his efforts to divert them, his thoughts drifted immediately to Noelle Victor. Of all the beautiful and successful women in the world, why was he dwelling on the very one who could damage his relationship with Raine the most? Her excitement and reaction to Raine’s answers that last day of testing made him question what she hoped to learn or gain from his daughter’s gifts. Although his initial doubts concerning Noelle had faded, he still wasn’t sure what her motives were. And why were some of the things Derek related, concerning Patty’s desire for him to love again, surfacing in his thoughts?

  Never mind what anyone said. It wasn’t time to move on. It was too soon to think about loving someone again. Raine was still the only person who mattered. He would continue to remind himself of this each time he looked into the doctor’s hypnotic blue eyes.

  ****

  There was no use lying in bed any longer; the battle for sleep was lost. Might as well get up and get going. The unseasonably cool, late April morning dictated indoor work. Sean resolved to bury himself below deck in the Morgan and attack jobs put off far too long. Most of the chores entailed work on the Yanmar inboard engine. Raine brought a few books to pass the time. She expressed a desire to help but, when faced with the prospect of icky grease on her hands, chose to read instead. She yawned and settled in below deck with Sean and Mark Twain, as cute as a doll in her jeans and sweater, red socks, and boat shoes.

  Sean was astounded by her insatiable thirst for reading but remained vigilant in filtering what she read. He begrudgingly relented to her requests to read about a variety of topics, including high school math and science books as well as an occasional medical journal. She also loved the classics—at least the ones Sean allowed her to read. Trips to the outlet mall in the nearby town of Foley were more frequent now, simply because she had read her way through every allowable book in the house. To save money, he took her to the library. The increasing frequency of the trips and size of the stacks of books she blazed through soon required a different tack. After some thought, and despite the strain on the budget, he bought her a laptop and Kindle, albeit after paying extra to have the proper restrictions installed. It was worth it for the peace of mind alone. The last thing he wanted for her was to get the wrong education from the vastness of cyberspace.

  All throughout changing the oil in the Yanmar, the house phone continued to ring. The thin hull of the boat did little to drown out the shrill of the outside bell. The caller or callers were persistent and weren’t giving up easily.

  “Let’s take a break, sweetie.” He stepped from the engine room into the main cabin, where Raine lounged on a settee. She closed the book she was reading.

  “Daddy, it’s sad what Mr. Twain said about the people in India,” she said and sat up. “Do the people in China have the same kind of problems they have?”

  “Ah, from Following the Equator. How do you mean, sweetheart?”

  “Well, it seems there’s nobody to take care of them,” she said. “A lot of people don’t have enough food and stuff.”

  “Unfortunately, sweetie…” He caught his breath and sat next to her. “A lot of countries, including China and India, don’t value life like we do here in America, and don’t have a lot of the things we take for granted here.”

  “We’re very lucky, aren’t we, Daddy?” she asked, nodding. “And I can’t wait to help them all.”

  “Help who, my little one?”

  “All the people of the world.”

  Sean thought for a minute and resolved that her pledge was generic, somewhat like a child wanting to be a fireman. Still, his curiosity was piqued.

  “How do you mean, my little fix-the-world girlie?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Well, I think that is a very nice wish you have.” He smiled. “But before we go off saving the world, how does a snack sound? Somebody keeps calling the house phone, and I think we should maybe check out who’s calling.”

  “Yeah, I heard all the ringing.” She hopped up and took Sean’s hand. “Wonder who it is?”

  “Let’s go see.”

  The phone rang again, as they reached the kitchen door. Sean grabbed a juice and water as he picked it up. He handed the juice to Raine.

  “Sean,” Noelle sounded frantic. “I’ve been trying to get you all morning. I tried your cell phone, too.”

  “Sorry, we were out on the boat,” he said. “My cell phone is charging in my bedroom.”

  “Are you sitting down?” There was an excitement in her voice that made him smile, in spite of his apprehension.

  “Should I be?”

  “Guess who called the office this morning?”

  “I give up, who called?”

  “World Cable News,” she said. He could have sworn she giggled.

  “Serves you right,” he said and winked at Raine. “You should’ve paid your bill.”

  “Very funny,” she said.

  “So, I have two questions,” he said. “First, did they call concerning my brilliant and lovely daughter? And second, how did they know about my brilliant and lovely daughter?”

  “Sean, the test results have been out over a month now. Not specifics, just generalities,” she replied. “It was bound to leak out to the media sooner or later. I don’t know, maybe some friend of a friend of an employee of the testing agency has a friend who has a friend who works at a network. You have to understand, this kind of news can’t be contained for very long. Word had to leak out eventually.”

  “So, what happens now?” he asked. He ignored
the signal that another call was waiting. He looked at the display but didn’t recognize the area code or number.

  “Nothing.”

  “Nothing?”

  “I can’t and won’t divulge anything concerning Raine, although Connie said most of the callers knew a lot about her and you.”

  “Callers, as in more than one? Who called besides World Cable News?”

  “I think an easier question to answer would be who hasn’t called. After all, the test scores are quite a story. You should prepare yourself to be bombarded by the media. It won’t take very long for all these callers to find your numbers.”

  “Cell phone too? Even though all my numbers are unlisted?”

  “Of course. They’ll find a way. I want you to know I’m doing what I can to deflect them. Besides, you know I wouldn’t or couldn’t give out any information anyway, not without your permission.”

  “Are you asking for my permission?”

  A short silence followed.

  “Quite honestly, I don’t know,” she admitted. “I’m not sure I know exactly how to handle all this newfound notoriety. So I can imagine how you’re feeling. I’m not sure what happens next.”

  “Thank you for that.”

  “For what?”

  “Never mind,” he said, relieved she was trying to temper the newfound fame. “Look, I know it’s Saturday and you’re off the clock, but I was wondering if you might be free for dinner tonight? Maybe we could talk more?”

  Another short silence.

  “Noelle?”

  “I’m sorry,” she said. There was an immediate change of tone in her voice. “I…can’t. I have other plans. Maybe some other time?”

  “Okay, sure,” he replied. “I understand.”

  He didn’t understand. What had happened? Why had her tone changed? It was as if someone had walked into the room, surprising her. As if she was trying to cut the conversation short.

  After he hung up, he thought about the conversation for a long while. He felt terrible. Had he said something wrong? The suspicions again surfaced. What were her motives in evaluating Raine? What did she hope to gain from all this? Would she put her own aspirations above the interests of her patient? That’s what Raine was to her, wasn’t it, just a patient? No more, right?

  There was so much he didn’t know about Noelle Victor. And the more he thought about it, the more he wondered if the kiss had been just another strategic move to her. Was it a ploy to reel in his trust? No doubt, Raine could be a feather in her professional hat. The doctor could stand to profit greatly from the notoriety, not to mention draining him dry with her fees.

  He had never felt so vulnerable. Why was he so drawn to her, given all his suspicions? With that one kiss, he had allowed his heart to venture out onto his sleeve. Now it was being slapped around by someone he hardly knew. All the bells of alarm were sounding loud and clear. And yet one fact came into crystal clear view.

  He was falling hard for her.

  ****

  Noelle hung up the phone and cried. She had willed the tears away during the conversation with him, but after hanging up they flowed.

  How could he be so insensitive as to ask her to dinner after prefacing it with I know it’s Saturday, and you’re off the clock? Just like a man. How impersonal. What must he think of her? Was she also off the clock at Raine’s party when she kissed him? And why had he not said anything about that since? Did the kiss mean that little to him? Apparently, at least not as much as it had meant to her. Yes, it was true; she was embarrassed. At first she considered what happened to be highly unprofessional. She certainly had no intention of becoming attracted to Sean, especially since his daughter was her patient. That didn’t make her a bad person, did it? She thought not but still had a measure of doubt. Was her attraction to him having an effect on her professional judgment? How quickly she had grown attached to Raine! So many questions swirled around in her head about them both. She couldn’t seem to make sense of any of it.

  And if this notoriety of Raine’s played out as she suspected, it could monopolize more of her time than she could afford, given her goal of growing her practice. Yet she was drawn to Raine and Sean like a fly to honey. Why was she allowing herself to get so involved?

  That kiss. Understand it or not, it had happened. One thing was for certain—it wasn’t a casual kiss, at least not to her. It had meant so much more. It seemed so right. She hadn’t seen it coming, yet when it happened, she had absolutely no control over stopping it. At first, she thought it was something that was going to happen and then be done with. A kind of celebratory kiss of relief that Raine’s fall had resulted in only minor injuries. Frankly, she wasn’t expecting much from the kiss, given that Sean didn’t seem to show much interest in her. What harm could it do? And then when his lips crushed her mouth, she was lost. Lost in another world she had been unaware of. The kiss had possessed her and made her so willing to be dominated. Her arms grew weak around his muscular chest, and for a moment she had felt faint.

  Had a kiss ever done that to her before? She would be fooling herself if she thought so. Scott certainly never made her feel that way. Sure, Sean was bigger and stronger, but it was more than that. There was gentleness in his hands as he took her face and drew her to his lips. It was an urgent yet gentle need she had never felt from, or for, any man before. And then he had pressed her against his body. She was on fire as she felt his body react. What would have happened if they had been alone? She had fantasized about that. It was like a scene from a movie. Would she have been able to temper her passion? Would he? Did he harbor the same passion?

  Other plans. Why had she told him that? Why hadn’t she told him right then and there how she felt? With that thought, she admitted she wasn’t quite sure how she felt.

  And what do you know about him, Noelle?

  Plenty, yet nothing. Just that he was a loving father who adored his daughter. But with adoration came his exclusivity. He was solely intent on protecting his daughter and had little interest in anything or anyone else.

  God, he was gorgeous. Was that the only thing behind her desire for him? She refused to believe she might be that shallow. What she felt had to be deeper than that. He seemed to be so much more than a pretty face and body. He was successful and intelligent. He was the strong, silent type, and one of his best attributes was humility, something she hadn’t seen in many single men. Instead, most eligible men were more concerned about the level of testosterone they could display than anything else.

  Could she trust him?

  She hadn’t a clue. Something had to give. Her nerves and well-being depended on resolution concerning this matter of Sean Sampson and demanded it fast. Her desire to help Raine had to trump everything. And that meant having to keep her romantic interest in Sean at bay. She had known Raine a matter of weeks, and she was so attached to her, more than to any other patient she had treated. The little girl displayed a great many of the positive attributes her father possessed. She was very well adjusted, considering being separated from her mother and being raised by a single parent. Sean had truly worked miracles.

  She thought long and hard about his wife. Or ex-wife. Or whatever she was to him. Had he ever actually been married? Did she live close by? Why did Raine live with Sean and not her mother? Did she ever talk to her mother, or visit with her? Noelle found herself wondering what she looked like. She would bet she was a beautiful woman, although he didn’t seem to be the superficial type. Then again, he was extremely attractive and might demand that in a woman. Noelle was sure they made a beautiful couple.

  How could she compete with that? She couldn’t get her head around it all. She was having severe feelings of inadequacy and was not at all prepared to deal with them. Not with all that remained to be accomplished with Raine.

  Chapter Seven

  Three major cable networks, seven universities, including two Ivy League schools, and several corporations and foundations left messages on Sean’s land line voicemail. Messages and
texts piled up on his cell from various magazines, research institutions, and one think-tank, scattered among those from friends.

  He had no clue what to do next. If he had his way, he would do nothing at all, but that didn’t seem like a viable option. He doubted any of the callers would simply give up.

  He tried to shield Raine from most of it. He returned the calls from friends and acquaintances, including Elaine and others from the beach bunch. Most seemed genuinely interested in Raine, with the possible exception of Elaine. Sean was sure she had ulterior motives for her calls, but she held no interest for him. He politely and diplomatically fended off her invitations and innuendoes.

  Parks, the guard at the bridge gate to Ono Island, handled the local traffic. Sean called him immediately with a warning, after hanging up with Noelle. Sean hated to think what the situation would be without the security provided by Ono. He couldn’t imagine what a nightmare he would be facing otherwise, from news vans, reporters, and TV stations, all parked outside his home. Thank goodness none of them would make it that close! Living in a gated, island community did have its benefits.

  Nothing, however, could compare with an incident that occurred at the Sampson household. It stirred a hornet’s nest of speculation on how smart Raine was. A couple of weeks after the news leak, when Sean was helping his daughter develop the motor skills necessary for faster Internet surfing on her new computer, he left her to practice, while he took a quick shower, confident the restrictions built into the device would render the situation safe for the few minutes needed for his shower.

  He hadn’t thought about restricting the house phone.

  After his shower, he returned to the den and found Raine talking away with someone, her little face plastered to the receiver. At first, he refused to panic and was confident the call was from someone she knew, maybe Derek or Noelle, both of whom routinely called. It soon became apparent, as he finished towel-drying his hair, that the call was from persons unknown. Before Sean could ask, Raine noticed him and told the caller she was sorry, she had to go. She abruptly hung up the phone.