“Who are you?” I cry out, as I feel the bones in my body breaking. The sound alone is enough to make me scream, picturing how horrible my body must look as I snap into different angles.
“My name is Faith, I’m your wolf,” she says, keeping her tone calm and gentle.
I scream and continue to cry out. “Please help me, make it stop….please,” I sob.
My vision pulses and when it clears I see the trees thrashing from side to side, some of the thinner ones on the verge of snapping.
“You were a strong human. You will be an even stronger wolf. Fate sent me to you because she believed you were special just like me. My spirit is very old my love. I’ve been around for many years jumping from one great master to the next. Fate was saving me, she has been keeping me for you… I know it! You my dear…you are very rare. You don’t realise how powerful you truly are…the power that resides within you is pure…white…like magic. I’ve never seen such a thing,” Faith says, and I feel her happiness and awe.
“Faith, can we please do this whole introduction thing another time? Maybe when my bones aren’t snapping? I promise if I live through this I’ll tell you everything you want to know, but right now I need you to focus and walk me through this whole fucking thing,” I say through gritted teeth, the pain making it hard for me to even breathe.
“Don’t cuss my dear, it isn’t very lady like,” she scolds.
“Faith!” I yell.
“All righty then.” She lets out a deep sigh. “Try getting yourself onto your hands and knees first.”
I roll over. My first two attempts at lifting myself up fail and I fall face first with a mouthful of sand. Faith giggles.
“I would totally slap you right now if I could,” I tell her through my cries, making her giggles louder in my head. I manage to get onto my hands and knees and try to catch my breath, calming my breathing.
“Just like that,” she encourages.
The pain is still unbearable and I’m just so exhausted I want to fall down, rest my head and go to sleep for a little while.
“No my dear, you better not do that. You may not wake up if you fall asleep now. You can do this, stay strong,” she says softly, as if reading my mind.
I look down at my hands, crying out as another crack echoes into the woods, only to be swept away by the wind as I watch the tears fall into the sand below me.
My vision starts pulsing again.
Clear. Unclear. Clear.
I see glimpses of my forearms and the little hairs that rise from beneath my skin. I squeeze my eyes shut as the bones in my hands and arms crack and bend.
For the next twenty minutes I scream and cry out in pain; my throat raw and dry from my screams. The sound of material ripping and bones cracking finally come to a halt and all that can be heard is my deep panting.
Panting?
I open my eyes and jump back as I see pitch black paws.
I hear Faith’s light laughter in my ears. “You did it my dear. You’re beautiful!” I can feel the affection radiating in her voice.
My senses are clearer. I can see every single little detail, every little grain of sand beneath my paws and my hearing is magnified too. Suddenly I hear shouting and yelling in the distance, but I’m too focused on what I look like and feel like to even think about any of that. Faith’s voice tells me to go look at my refection in the lake.
I finally find my rhythm as I walk on all four paws. I quicken my steps and then full out run and head to the little docking platform. I lean over the side and look into the water.
The first thing I see are my eyes. Long gone are my bluey-green ones, in their place are the silver flame like ones that I have when my magic needs to be freed.
My coat is pitch black and shiny.
My father and Jax have black coats, but theirs are not nearly as dark as mine. I’ve never seen anything as black as the colour of my fur.
I hear rustling and immediately a few people walk out of the bushes on my right near the forest. All eyes are on me. Amongst the group are Talon, Tyler, their girlfriends and my parents.
“Shift!” Johnny growls out.
“They think you’re a rogue,” Faith says.
“Who are you and why are you on my land? Where is my daughter?” Johnny growls out again. I look at the rest of the crowd, they all look uneasy, as if they’re about to jump me at any second.
“Speak to them, tell them who you are,” Faith says, sounding nervous.
“And how am I supposed to do that? Bark? I haven’t exactly had time to figure out how this whole wolf thing works Faith.” I saunter cautiously down the wooden dock toward the shore.
“Yes right, sorry. Okay just look at your father and think about what you want to say to him. Focus.”
“Do you not hear me rogue? Speak!” Johnny roars, making me step back afraid.
I watch as Alex looks at me, her eyebrows furrowing.
“Johnny wait!” She whispers, but I still hear her clearly from where I’m standing. She steps forward and picks up my torn clothes lying on the ground.
Johnny looks at the shredded material then back at me, his stance relaxing somewhat.
“Angel?” He asks, using a caring and less domineering tone.
I watch Tyler and Talon gasp. Tyler tries to take a step forward, but Talon grabs his arm quickly.
The bond that is between us is making it hard for me to focus on anyone other than the two of them. I can almost feel their beating hearts in my own chest, feel every breath they take as if it’s my own and I can even hear their thoughts.
“She’s beautiful…” Tyler thinks sounding out of breath.
“Amazing….” Talon thinks.
Then I look to the girls on either side of them and the spell breaks.
I growl and force my eyes to look at my parents.
Turning fully towards them, I focus all my attention on Johnny then Alex.
“Mom?” I say in my head, hoping it works.
Alex and Johnny both take off running in my direction across the sand.
They come to a skidding halt at my side, Alex immediately stroking my back. “You did it. All on your own sweetie. I’m so proud of you.” She smiles lovingly at me as she wipes a tear away.
Johnny bends down and pulls me against him nuzzling my neck and scratching my head.
That feels really good. Hmmm….
“You’re perfect baby girl. Perfect.”
“Boys? Aren’t you going to congratulate our girl?” Johnny lifts his head to the twins. I turn to see them standing a couple metres away staring at each other.
They both turn to head in my direction.
“No Dad, it’s cool. Leave them. They’re busy.” Talon and Tyler immediately stop, looking at me with shock and what seems to look something close to hurt. They have no reason to feel hurt, especially after how they both treated me this evening.
Guess I was projecting my thoughts to them also.
“Nope, that was me projecting your thoughts to those bloody fools,” Faith tsks.
Johnny looks down at me confused as if he’s trying to understand whats going on between the twins and I. I know he’ll be asking questions later when we’re alone; I just hope he can wait till then.
“Race you back to the house?” I say, immediately bolting past the twins and into the woods. I hear Johnny chuckling behind me. I may not be as big as my father but It seems that I am super-fast in my wolf form.
The wind in my coat is exhilarating. My body aches, but it is so worth all the pain if I get to feel this free and independent whenever I want to. The sun has started to rise as I reach the porch to the pack house with Johnny hot on my heels.
“I knew it! You’re an even faster wolf. I knew you were going to survive the shift, I just knew it!” He says proudly, catching his breath.
“Go on upstairs and change. Don’t think you’re quite ready to shift in front of people just yet,” he chuckles, opening the door for me.
I don’t thi
nk I will ever be ready to be naked in front of anyone.
“You must be exhausted baby girl. How about you take the rest of the day to recover and I’ll move the ceremony to tomorrow night?” He says, patting the top of my head.
“Good idea.”
I run up the stairs and into my room thankful that no one’s around. I nose my door closed.
“Now what?” I ask Faith.
“Just think of your body when it’s in its human form and think of changing back to it,” Faith says.
I do as she says and I feel my body shifting. I collapse naked on the floor and stretch my stiff aching muscles.
“It will get better my dear. Your body will adjust,” she says.
“That was exhausting,” I sigh, letting out a deep breath.
“You better get dressed, our mates are on their way to see us.”
I force my stiff body to stand up and quickly head for the bathroom locking myself in there. I ignore the boys at they knock on both my bedroom door and bathroom door.
“Angel…” It’s Tyler. I pause in the shower, listening as he rests his head against the other side of the door. “I’m sorry about earlier… I’m so proud of you, for shifting.” I stand silently for another minute before I finally hear his footsteps as he starts walking away.
I take my time having a steamy hot shower contemplating everything that has happened over the past twenty four hours. Once I’ve washed the emotion of the day away, I change into a pair of shorts and a comfortable shirt.
These days I’m barely able to look at myself in the mirror. I keep imagining seeing my beaten broken face when I look at my reflection. Instead when I look in the mirror today, none of the scars can be seen, my eyes are back to their normal shade of bluey green. I brush my wet hair and stick it into a bun, preparing myself to head downstairs to await all the questions that I know will be coming my way.
I leave my room, looking left and right. I don’t sense the twins anywhere near; I’m thankful that the bond we share enables me to tell if they’re near or far. I do however smell something in the air. I raise my nose to try and catch the delicious scent.
Pancakes.
My stomach growls as I smell the yummy goodness. I follow the scent towards the kitchen, noticing how quiet the house is all of a sudden. I find a plate of freshly made pancakes covered in cinnamon on the counter and grab one.
Hearing a noise coming from the back of the house, I make my way down the passage towards the humming sound. I step out onto the porch and there sitting on the steps sits a familiar face.
“Greg!” I yell with a mouth full of pancake. He turns his head around then stands up. I smile as he jogs up to me, pulls me into his arms, then swings me around chuckling against my collar bone. I know I’m stiff in his arms; I’m still not too comfortable being touched. But I manage to hold on as he does his thing, hoping he doesn’t sense my discomfort.
“Lexi! I was wondering when I would see you. I’ve been here for some time now,” he says, still holding me tight.
“Put. Her. Down. Now!”
Greg drops me and I stumble turning to face a scary looking Tyler glowering at Greg. Greg is a big guy, but the twins are much taller and broader than him. He tries to pull me behind him in a protective stance but stops suddenly when he hears growling behind us.
“Touch her again and I’ll rip your god damn hands off,” Talon spits.
Greg immediately pauses, looking down at me with uncertainty.
“What the hell is wrong with you two?” I ask.
“No Lexi!” Talon spits my name. “What is wrong with you?”
I growl at the use of my old name. Greg backs away and raises an eyebrow in confusion. I don’t ever want to be referred to as Lexi again, but I’ll have to explain that to him another time.
“You want his hands all over you, is that it?” Talon asks through our mate link still glaring at Greg behind me.
I need to learn how to control our link, I don’t want anyone inside my head; I have too many secrets I need to keep hidden.
“I will teach you everything you need to know, Angel. Don’t let their words hurt you. They’re in pain and their wolves are punishing them, they’re taking it out on you.” Faith’s voice echoes reassurance.
“He’s probably one of the many men you’ve been stringing along. Isn’t he?” Tyler links back in disgust. I can hear my wolf whimpering from within me because of the way our mates are speaking to us.
“Out of interest, just how long is this list Lexi? What number were we?” Talon continues. Greg obviously isn’t included in our link, but he stands perfectly still watching as we communicate to each other without actually saying the words out loud.
“Remember when you told us that we needed to start treating people better? You said that one day we’d meet our mate and she probably wouldn’t like the people we were. Guess you should’ve listened to your own advice,” Tyler sniggers.
Since when did Tyler turn into such a dick? He was always the sweet one, I inwardly think.
I don’t bother to respond, truth is I have nothing left to say. Maybe I do deserve all of this, maybe I don’t… I don’t know. What I do know is that I’ve never been this harsh to either of them. I would never want to cause them pain, I would never intentionally do anything to hurt them.
“Yeah... I should’ve…” I whisper out loud, forcing myself to calm my anger. I look back up between the two boys and give them a sad smile. “You two better get back to your girls.”
Both faces turn pale and Talon looks as if he’s about to reach out for me, but I don’t give him the chance.
I turn to Greg. “How about we get outta their way for a little bit?” I beg him with my eyes. He looks down at me then at the twins behind me.
“Yeah sure, babe, we can do that.” He smiles, grabbing my hand and pulling me into his side as we walk away. I don’t look back at the twins, but I feel the sadness radiating from behind me through our bond.
Their growls don’t deter Greg from his mission as we make our way to his motorcycle. Greg doesn’t ask questions, he hands me a helmet, settles on the bike before taking off towards the exit of the woods.
He drives us to the edge of town before turning off onto another dust road. There are no cars around and even though I know Greg doesn’t exactly have the greatest track record when it comes to girls, I needed to get away from the twins; I’m going to have to give him the benefit of the doubt. He did see me in action when I took out those two rogues back in Point Bright, so hopefully he won’t be stupid and try hurt me. I really need a friend right now and I think Greg knows a thing or two about what I’m going through.
He stops the bike under a big tree and I jump off. We leave our helmets resting on his motorcycle and he sits down on the ground leaning against the tree. It’s a sunny day outside but it’s cool under the shade so I bend down and sit next to him, leaning my head against the tree. Greg doesn’t say anything, he just sits there looking out into the grass field that surrounds us. I let out a deep breath, feeling the tears that start to fall. I lean my head back closing my eyes, letting the tears flow freely.
I feel a big rough hand take mine and hold it tight. I bite down at the uneasiness his touch causes, relishing instead in the comfort it brings. He doesn’t say a word, just sits there waiting. I don’t even know what to say. I can’t find the words to explain why I’m so upset. Where do I even start? His thumb gently strokes my hand; his gentleness makes me cry harder as I lean my head against his shoulder.
I use my other hand to wipe away the tears. When I feel his eyes looking down at me, I look up to him; his eyes are moist but no tears fall. Why does he look so sad?
“You’re a wolf now, Lexi. Because of your relation to the Alpha of this pack I practically feel your sadness and hurt within me. You need to keep up those walls darlin’. Some wolves are strong enough to feel what you’re feeling and hear what you’re thinking without you even knowing.” He gives me a sad smile. Seems to me li
ke this whole wolf thing has more flaws than perks.
“Angel,” I say, looking out into the green field
“What?” He says, raising an eyebrow confused.
“I’m Angel now. Angel Blackwood actually. Alexia Eden is long gone,” I say flatly.
“And what happened to Alexia?” He asks curiously.
“She was a horrible person who played games with people’s emotions without caring for the consequences. She was a naïve confused girl; I left her behind in Point Bright. I need to get the new life I’ve created here sorted and forget about that silly girl.”
He looks at me with a raised eyebrow. “I thought that girl was pretty fucking amazing.”
I let out a small laugh, shaking my head. I don’t have a response for that because I simply don’t believe it.
He’s quiet for a few seconds before continuing.
“Well in that case, if you’re Angel then I’m Nixon,” he says casually, leaning his head back against the tree looking into the distance.
“Nixon?”
“Yeah, my birth name is Nixon. Everyone at Point Bright called me Greg though. Long story,” he says in a softer tone. He keeps his eyes focused on the scene in front of us and away from me. It doesn’t seem as if he’s keen on explaining so I don’t ask questions; he will tell me when he’s ready.
“What happened to you Angel? You know you can trust me, you saved my life and brought me here; I owe all my happiness to you. Talk to me, let it all out, you may think you’re all alone but you’re not. Talk to me.” He turns to face me as he pleads with eyes so sad. He feels my pain and I know he’s been through rejection, at least we have that in common. I really need someone to talk to, but I don’t want to deal with any judgement right now.
It takes me a few moments before I can say the words. “He rejected me.”
“Who? Drake?” he asks clearing his voice.
“No. That ass found his mate. I caught them in bed together; even that idiot didn’t reject his mate.” I hear Nixon inhale next to me but I continue, “I’m talking about Jax. He was my mate, I knew it the second I touched him but he didn’t even give me a chance… he just rejected me.” He squeezes my hand with not one bit of judgement in his eyes.
Angel Blackwood Page 3